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	masterofmidgets 2009-02-01 06:16 am UTC (link)
	I'm not sure whether that is horrifying, or the greatest thing ever invented. But I think it would be even better if you seasoned it with bacon salt. (Reply to this)

thespie
2009-02-01 02:32 pm UTC (link)

As someone who's spent a decade and a half in the meat industry in quality and regulatory issues and worked at plants that produced bacon and sausage, I can inform you of two things:

1. The Bacon Explosion is what meat industry QA people see in their nightmares. I don't even want to think about having to set up a HACCP plan for it.

2. My mental framework has been so changed by my work experience that I can't understand why they're wanking about nutritional value rather than food safety concerns.

Sometimes interrogating the wank from the wrong perspective cannot be avoided. This is one of those times for me.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	llama_treats 2009-02-01 03:40 pm UTC (link)
	You're such a fucking downer. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	seiberwing 2009-02-01 04:31 pm UTC (link)
	I take it you don't eat much sausage anymore? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	thespie 2009-02-01 04:40 pm UTC (link)
	Frankly, I don't eat much of anything anymore. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	dragonfangirl 2009-02-02 08:38 am UTC (link)
	I got that way for years after I took a Microbiology course in college. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	tehrin 2009-02-01 07:29 pm UTC (link)
	Be funny. We don't need your thoughts on ~~yaoi~~ sausage. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	rotten_fish 2009-02-01 08:36 pm UTC (link)
	But, mom, everybody else is doing it! Like, everybody. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	tehrin 2009-02-01 09:24 pm UTC (link)
	I know. But they should know better. He could have had a recipe at least. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

thespie
2009-02-02 05:27 am UTC (link)

You don't get it, do you? To me, this wank is not funny. Bacon and sausage to me are SERIOUS BUSINESS. My paycheck for me, and literally life and death for you if I don't do my job. And, frankly, right now, I'm not in the mood to joke about this subject due to a few Georgia crackers who've given my field a major black eye over the past couple of weeks due to a complete lack of ethics and concern for the consumer.

But you want a recipe? Fine.

ARBY'S PEPPER BACON

1 pound uncut slab bacon, preferably Armour or Eckrich
18 ounces coarse-ground black pepper
2 ounces sugar

Preheat oven to 250 degrees F. Take a cookie sheet or large pizza pan and line with aluminum foil. Mix pepper and sugar together and spread the mixture over a flat surface (not the cookie sheet or pizza pan from the last step). Remove slab bacon from package. Wet slab thoroughly under cold water. Roll wet slab in pepper/sugar mixture until slab is completely coated. Place on cookie sheet or pizza pan, then place in oven. Bake at 250 degrees for six hours. Remove from oven and let cool for thirty minutes on the sheet/pan. Wrap slab in the aluminum foil from the baking step and place in freezer (not refrigerator) for at least 24 hours. Bacon will be messy when you cut it into strips.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

white_serpent
2009-02-02 06:06 am UTC (link)

And, frankly, right now, I'm not in the mood to joke about this subject due to a few Georgia crackers who've given my field a major black eye over the past couple of weeks due to a complete lack of ethics and concern for the consumer.

Your options in this situation:
(a) Use the damned scroll bar
(b) Read the wank and don't comment
(c) Read the wank, and comment about massively serious business, draining all the joy out of life for everyone else.

You chose option c!

Consider the advantages of options a or b in the future.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	thespie 2009-02-02 07:06 am UTC (link)
	Shouldn't you should have thought of options A and B when you sent a little missive to ff.net back in 2001 regarding certain Serious Business in re Pamela Dean and plagiarism? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

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ashenmote, 2009-02-02 02:07 pm UTC

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cmdr_zoom, 2009-02-02 08:01 pm UTC

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white_serpent, 2009-02-02 08:47 pm UTC

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napalmnacey, 2009-02-04 02:40 am UTC

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napalmnacey, 2009-02-04 02:38 am UTC

	llama_treats 2009-02-02 03:14 pm UTC (link)
	Click here. (Reply to this)(Parent)

evilsqueakers
2009-02-03 02:43 am UTC (link)

Actually, I do get it. I live in Georgia and Kroger's called to warn me I might have stuff made with the salmonella. And I still don't see how bacon=peanut butter unless the Doctor has been using his screwdriver all over the place and peanut bacon's been invented because of an overabundance of resources in the year 5 billion on New New York.

Actually, peanut bacon sounds really good right now.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

	tehrin 2009-02-03 07:37 am UTC (link)
	Yes, I do get it. OTF=/= your personal soap box. But thanks for the recipe. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	ara 2009-02-03 04:35 am UTC (link)
	Sometimes interrogating the wank from the wrong perspective cannot be avoided. Have you tried not hitting the "Post Comment" button? Works for me. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	kefanii 2009-02-01 08:30 pm UTC (link)
	Soooo... probably shouldn't ask them their thoughts on genuine maple and bacon lollipops, huh? (Reply to this)(Thread)

	demonbean 2009-02-02 09:40 pm UTC (link)
	http://www.teeandcakes.com/ Maple, bacon, and chocolate cupcakes! (Reply to this)(Parent)

	damien 2009-02-01 11:11 pm UTC (link)
	Not only did the members of THAT comm get a bacon tag, but we apparently have one too! Ask and you shall receive. In abundance. ~~Now nobody ask for bacon...~~ (Reply to this)(Thread)

	cmdr_zoom 2009-02-02 08:04 pm UTC (link)
	iiiiit's BACON! (Reply to this)(Parent)

	demonbean 2009-02-02 08:59 pm UTC (link)
	musicgoddess917: O HAI GUYZ, BACON! Various: Oh, lord, not this same bacon roll for the fifth time this month. musicgoddess917: FUCK YOU ALL I HATE YOU AND YOU ALL NEED TO GET A LIFE YOU PIECES OF SHIT. I mean, seriously. Just say "whoops" and move on? (Reply to this)

	feenix 2009-02-03 04:43 am UTC (link)
	So, uh...OTF...what are your thoughts on ~~yaoi~~ bacon? (Reply to this)(Thread)

	vzg 2009-02-03 01:42 pm UTC (link)
	The crispier, the better! Wait, no, I retract that. I've said that before and it lead the cookers of said bacon to believe that crispy = burnt. There was no bacon left, only char. :[ (Reply to this)(Parent)

	deviantdesade 2009-02-03 06:54 pm UTC (link)
	Reasons this wank rocks: 1) Bacon is yum. 2) Massive tantrums are funny. 3) In house wanking made me go googly-eyed. (Reply to this)

	napalmnacey 2009-02-04 02:35 am UTC (link)
	If I were a member of that community, and I saw that asplosion of wank, I'd be posting pictures of the cat with bacon taped to it. (Reply to this)

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