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Ilpalazzo ([info]ilpalazzo) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2009-08-18 23:53:00


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Entry tags:my kingdom for a link

Seattle vs. Bad PR: FIGHT!
Ah Seattle, my wanky home.

This one's just a little niblet, but it is a wank so perfectly formed in miniature that I can't help but show it off.

fuzzinit makes a post in the Seattle comm advertising his little home-based business featuring high-tech spy equipment and self-defense weapons and, apparently, chastity belts. Screencap here.  fuzzinit, in so doing, breaks a handful of comm rules and is told so, and begins deleting comments which harsh his groove willy-nilly. O noes! Post swiftly disappears.

Helpful community member creates second post where people can freely discuss fuzzinit. With breathtaking efficiency and elegance, fuzzinit goes through the Seven Stages Of Wank straight through I DIN' DO NU'IN to a really nifty double flounce in about five posts. But hey, despite doing everything wrong, he got hits! And hits are what's important, right?

...The Seattleites are still chewing on him a bit, since despite the fabulous flounce he's still trying to cling to the moral high ground. And on that moral high ground is a big ol' knife and night-vision goggles!

ETA: Huzzah, I post this and then go off hiking for a day and come back to discover I've completely failed! Links should be fixed, on the off chance that you have not already taken advantage of helpful commenters covering my ass.

ETA 2: HOLY CRAP THERE'S A SEQUEL! More like a parody. Maybe an homage. At any rate, stutts whips it out and the love flows like wine. Our city-hopping small businessman is revealed to be a true nationwide phenomenon!



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[info]dragonfangirl
2009-08-20 11:19 pm UTC (link)
Wait wait wait, cambler is on seattle? As in, he lives in Seattle?

AUGH.

BRB MOVING TO OTHER CITY NOW.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]frequentmouse
2009-08-20 11:48 pm UTC (link)
Well, Issaquah, I think. But, yeah, it's a rare [info]seattle post he doesn't step into.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]white_serpent
2009-08-21 03:34 am UTC (link)
He's too close. D:

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]frequentmouse
2009-08-21 05:05 am UTC (link)
Hey, I'm an extra sixty miles (and four rolling slowdowns) away, and even that feels ickily close.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]dragonfangirl
2009-08-26 02:02 am UTC (link)
Maybe he'll get eaten by a cougar. I can always hope.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


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