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The Great Internet Bra Debate
How dirty is your bra?

Someone sent a letter to Dear Prudence asking if his girlfriend was normal because she's worn the same bra every day for two weeks. Prudie gives her usual inadequate and perplexing answer, starting with:

Perhaps your worries about hygiene arise from watching too much soft-core porn in which women get in the shower and soap their breasts for extended periods.

Reader comments range everywhere from ick:

I always wear a clean bra each day, just like I wear clean underwear EACH DAY. I've never heard of such a thing in my life as wearing the same clothes every day for weeks on end, especially not undergarments. And no, I'm not "filthy" rich. I grew up in a single wide trailer with extremely poor, hardworking parents, who taught me the value of SOAP and daily bathing.

to double standard!

Am I the only perosn who sees the endless gender-based double standard in society today? If this question was posed by a woman with a boyfriend who wore the same boxers for a week, the response would have centered around the boyfriend's level of evolution.

to several comments about how bras are expensive and wear out in the wash, bras don't get as dirty as undies, several comments asking how the guy knows she doesn't wash it, maybe she has several bras that look exactly the same, and there's even an informal poll asking how long people wear bras between washings. One of the best answers to the poll:

15 minutes. i have to take it off before me wife comes back

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quartz
2009-09-09 05:38 am UTC (link)

Virginia's Feminine Boutique says they're custom fit, however the reviews I've seen for them say that it's far more like a custom made bra than a custom fit. They also seem to have experience in larger sizes, both cup and band.

A bit closer to you is Judy's Intimate Apparel, however I haven't investigated them yet.

Darlene's is another option, though they're in Gig Harbor. I'm a bit skeptical of them since their website is riddled with typos, but at least they're up front about the styles they offer.

There's a lot of custom fit places around, but they seem to be more like the stereotypical Bellevue boutique or Nordstroms; lots of tiny expensive bras for tiny expensive women. I can't find it now, but I know NWSource had an article about some of the local bra boutiques because of an Oprah show that featured a Bellevue bra boutique. Argh, this is going to drive me nuts because I can remember at least two more places, one in Tacoma and another in University Place, that were advertised as true custom made shops, but I can't find my notes on them and Google keeps giving me car bras instead of women bras.

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tez
2009-09-09 05:54 am UTC (link)

Hoshi--Judy's is A MILE AWAY. I know exactly where the Olympia store is, it's across the street from my hairstylist. (This proves, once again, that you really CAN get anything in Olympia if you know where to look. Dear god.)

I think I'll be paying them a visit soon. My bra trauma isn't anything compared to some people, but I'm an obnoxiously in-between band size and it inevitably translates out into 'okay that bra was just fine two weeks ago WHAT HAPPENED WAAAAAAH'.

If Judy's turns out to be made of win, it will be worth reporting on. I have no problems driving for a good bra, but if I don't have to drive? Bonus. I swear I remember hearing about something in University Village up in Seattle, but hell if I know what it was called. I just vaguely remember it in that 'this place exists I think' way.

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quartz
2009-09-09 06:14 am UTC (link)

Isn't that annoying when you know you've heard of it, but can't remember enough of the details to look for it?

I don't have bra trauma, just a really hard size to find without underwires. Technically I should be a 4D or higher, but I have yet to find a decent bra that doesn't have half a yard of wire per cup in a cup size larger than 3D.

Sometime in the next couple of weeks I'll be making my bi-annual pilgrimage to the Lane Bryant Outlet Store in Chehalis for bras and clearance work clothes simply because they're the only place around that has wireless bras (now that's a mental image, bras zipping freely through the air between laptops) without horribly placed seams in anything resembling my size. I'll try to stop by Judy's and check them out too.

There is one thing that I have never been able to find in Olympia: Decent Chinese food. Not the greasy fried serve-over-white-rice stuff, but proper noodles, egg foo yung, and meat dishes that haven't been coated in a sugar based syrup. My co-workers used to go on hunts for decent Chinese at lunch and no one ever succeeded. :(

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tez
2009-09-09 06:40 am UTC (link)

Yea, verily. Usually when I find something, though, it's because I accidentally stumbled on it in some random, out of the way shop -- and then I squeak and flail and generally make an idiot out of myself.

...oh my god, I would like...kill for a properly-fitting non-underwire bra. I'm not huge, but I swear my band size is 35. 34s throttle me, 36s I almost always have as tight as they'll go and then when they stretch out a little bit it's all she wrote. Sigh. I need to go root around in the outlet stores more often; I get down to Chehalis pretty much never, though. I'm more inclined to go north.

Hm. You know, I never thought much about it but I think you're right. I've found killer good Thai, good Japanese, Vietnamese, Mexican, Korean BBQ, gastropub...but no Chinese. I think I might have to go out on a mission to find some decent Chinese food; nobody's topped Yen Ching's on South Tacoma Way for me yet.

...mmm, dry braised beef...

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quartz
2009-09-09 07:00 am UTC (link)

I'm amazed at the outlet stores in Chehalis. They're some of the better ones I've ever found. Plus there's the added bonus that I get to hit ShopKo on my way south. Ah ShopKo, bringer of cheap shirts and bedding, how I wish you were closer.

South > north! Far less traffic, better parking, better prices, less gross commercia lism* (until north of Everett at least). I may be biased though since I'm Tacoma born and raised and currently working in Seattle while living in Federal Way. Ugh, Olympia was so nice when I was working there, even if I did have to deal with base traffic coming back north.

Oooo Yen Ching's you say? *makes note to visit* Anywhere else you'd recommend?

*This is apparently a JF flagged spam word, hence the extra space

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tez
2009-09-09 07:18 am UTC (link)

I LOVE the Chehalis outlet stores, I just rarely end up leaving the city unless I absolutely have to. So that means I don't get to Chehalis as often as I get to Tacoma or Seattle; I have relatives up there so I end up making the trip north far more often. I PREFER to be down here for living purposes though. I hate commutes; I was commuting from Oly to Tacoma for a while and that? Sorta blew.

Yen Ching's. South Tacoma Way, in the Korean part of town; it's across the street from the shopping center the old Pal-Do World market was in before they moved to that HUGE new building a mile or so down the street. Little strip mall, tucked off to the side, you'd totally miss it if you didn't know what you were looking for, and I could seriously devour their Chinese food all damn day long. Served family style too which is the only good way to do it.

(If you're up north, I HIGHLY recommend Snappy Dragon in Northgate if you haven't discovered them already. One word: POTSTICKERS.)

Those are my two favorite Chinese joints, no contest. I just wish they were closer; there's no good Chinese within walking distance of work and that's where I'd expect it to be since I'm downtown. I can get everything BUT the Chinese. Wah.

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quartz
2009-09-09 07:31 am UTC (link)

Ah, yeah, visiting people always seems to have a higher priority than just going shopping or sightseeing. The Chehalis outlet stores were unknown to me until I was down there getting half a pig this spring and happened to glance out the window and see the Lane Bryant store sign.

Olympia always seems to be much more laid back and friendly than the Tacoma/Seattle area. I think it has something to do with the (relative) proximity to the soothing ocean and its vast beaches. It was always pleasant to drive down there for work or visiting even though I drove from Tacoma and not once did I ever come back more stressed than I left because of bad traffic or rude jerks. Too bad I've pretty much worked myself into a career that'll keep me in the Seattle/Kirkland area and there's no high-speed mass transit rail line planned from Oly to Seattle. An hour commute now is bad enough, I can't imagine a 2/2.5 hour each way commute!

Yay! New food places to try! Thank you thank you!

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