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From the department of LOLWUT? ([info]theelusiven) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2010-03-16 19:08:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Current mood:*sporfle!*
Entry tags:community: customers_suck, food

In France they call it a Royale with Wank....
An afternoon snack in miniwank form from [info]customers_suck, courtesy of a mousie from [info]wank_report , from whom the writeup is copypasta'd because journalfen ate the writeup I was working on. There's pedantry here to rival the Buttercream wank from awhile back. Thanks, mousie!

Over at [info]Customers_Suck, [info]haine_otomiya86 posts about a particularly irate customer who - among other things - was unclear about whether he needed a "McDouble," which costs $1.00, and a "Double Cheese Burger," which costs $1.19. The story goes on to describe how the poster had to double check which one the customer actually wanted, as well as a quick mention as to what the difference between these two sandwiches are. Answer: the $1.00 one contains two patties and one slice of cheese, and the $1.19 contains two patties and two slices of cheese.

However, for one [info]magickcat, bothering a customer for clarification is apparently unacceptable.

Okay, seriously?
The customer was a jackass, I will give you that.
HOWEVER, your fussiness here about the McDouble/Double Cheeseburger thing is beyond ridiculous.
I don't mean in dealing with this guy- you did the best you could with an idiot like that, but for YEARS there was a dollar menu double cheeseburger.
Just because they took out one slice of cheese last year and decided to call it a "McDouble" doesn't mean that you shouldn't know what the heck someone is talking about when they specifty the "dollar menu double cheeseburger" which is EXACTLY WHAT A MCDOUBLE IS. There is a bun, there are two burgers, and there is cheese. I don't care how much you charge for it, its a freaking double cheeseburger. When someone specifies the "dollar menu double cheeseburger", if you don't know what they are talking about, well.... yeah.


As the thread unfolds, the reason for such an outburst is soon explained... [info]magickcat is in fact a Cheeseburger Master!

I understand the math of the cheese, I really do.
What I am saying in that it is still a double cheeseburger, because it is...get this... two burgers.. WITH CHEESE.
I don't eat at fast food restaurants, as a general rule, and we don't have In & Outs here, so your reference means nothing to me. It certainly isn't rocket science. I know a few rocket scientists, and they know that a sandwich with 2 burgers and cheese is a double cheeseburger. ;)

"I understand the math of the cheese" may be my new favorite phrase.

Cue rabid dogpiling and unsuccessful attempts to reason with Earth Logic and first grade math. Unfortunately it is all for naught as even [info]magickcat does not seem to know what exactly the point of the argument is. Depending on which thread you visit, it waffles from "they're both cheeseburgers; it's all the same" "Oh, you misunderstood: I wasn't talking about this customer at all, only a theoretical situation where everything was described perfectly," to the cost difference is all a conspiracy by McDonalds":

NO, it costs more because McDonalds saw a way to make more money by adding another burger. They are all "meat"burgers, if you can legally call whatever they put in those things "meat"... I know damn well what is in each one because it was in the news and whatnot about what the change would be. My case is correct, and it stands.


And the arguments just keep coming...


(Post a new comment)


[info]jkefka
2010-03-17 04:23 pm UTC (link)
...Jinx?

I have no idea what's going on here. Should two of us dump our posts or just wait for the mods to sort it out?

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]derumi
2010-03-17 04:27 pm UTC (link)
Wow. Just, wow. x_x

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]jkefka
2010-03-17 04:36 pm UTC (link)
I e-mailed the mods. They gave me the OK to get rid of my post so I'm just going to dump it and reduce confusion.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]theelusiven
2010-03-17 05:00 pm UTC (link)
I'm so sorry! I've been back and forth from in front of the computer all morning; I thought I'd replied to you on wank report in time. Sorry about that.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]jkefka
2010-03-17 05:07 pm UTC (link)
No worries! Yours is cleaner anyways. I just wanted to tidy it up quickly and save people (and mods) trouble. Besides, you got to it in W_R first.

Though if you want I can go on about a conspiracy of mods and how there's no real difference in our wank reports but one costs more electricity or something.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]missdaisy
2010-03-18 01:15 pm UTC (link)
Do you even understand the math of the wank?

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]youngcurmudgeon
2010-03-18 02:35 pm UTC (link)
No no no, it's not a conspiracy. All three posts used different amounts of cheese, thus making them completely different posts!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]grrliz
2010-03-17 05:27 pm UTC (link)
I agree with the person who wondered what the point of having two near identical sandwiches was in the first place.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]sarracenia
2010-03-17 06:29 pm UTC (link)
To confuse people into accidentally spending 19 cents on a single slice of cheese?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]theelusiven
2010-03-17 06:42 pm UTC (link)
Isn't that less than the going rate Vork was charging, though?

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]lady_ganesh
2010-03-24 07:03 pm UTC (link)
This is my guess.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]worstangel
2010-03-17 10:03 pm UTC (link)
I WORK at McDonald's (hey, it's a job =/) and I don't get it either. I hate the whole damned idea, to be honest.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]atreyu
2010-03-17 10:37 pm UTC (link)
So do I! It's amazing how plus or minus one piece of cheese can trip you up so much.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]deconcentrate
2010-03-18 09:02 pm UTC (link)
MICKEY D'S EMPLOYEES UNITE. \o/

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]atreyu
2010-03-19 12:10 am UTC (link)
We can discuss how disgusting the Mac Wrap is to make and in looks, and yet how tasty it turns out to be!

Or those frappes. @_@ They're an addiction.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]evilsqueakers
2010-03-19 02:34 am UTC (link)
Is the Mac Wrap that thing you get in the morning? I was flying from San Diego and needed to eat. I snagged a wrappy thing because it'd be easy to eat if I was on the plane and that shit was good. I was impressed since it looked so gross. First Mickey D's I've had in at least two years.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]dragonfangirl
2010-03-17 11:41 pm UTC (link)
Well, it makes sense to me. Different amounts of cheese to meat ratio makes it taste different.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]greenling
2010-03-18 03:39 am UTC (link)
The same reason why, back when the double cheeseburger was on the dollar menu, it was significantly less expensive than buying a regular single cheeseburger?

That is, I don't know, but that was certainly a strange conversation to have when I worked at McDonald's.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]loquaciousquark
2010-03-17 05:50 pm UTC (link)
Man, if this was three years ago, I could make a "can haz cheezburger" joke and still be amusing.

As it is, I know what I want for lunch today!

(Reply to this)


[info]sistercoyote
2010-03-17 07:22 pm UTC (link)
I think I'm sad that I know that $0.19 is actually a rather reasonable price for an additional slice of cheese.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]cmdr_zoom
2010-03-17 08:31 pm UTC (link)
Why? (honestly curious)

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]jupiterpluvius
2010-03-18 06:05 am UTC (link)
Yeah, that seems high to me for Kraft Singles even for buying them by the pack in the supermarket--obviously McDonalds should get a bulk rate.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]sistercoyote
2010-03-18 05:06 pm UTC (link)
Not really.

Base price of cheese + labor and overhead* + minimal markup.

*this includes but is not limited to: the minimum wage salary of the person making the cheeseburger and the person taking the order, the salary of the manager of the restaurant, facilities expenses (building maintenance, basically), and marketing.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]jupiterpluvius
2010-03-19 11:13 pm UTC (link)
Yes, but even including what would be the regular 300% per-unit restaurant markup (which is the markup ratio for a single restaurant, not for a giant chain), the variation in cost between the sandwich between the one with two beef patties and two slices of cheese and the one with two beef patties and one slice of cheese seems high.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]sistercoyote
2010-03-18 05:04 pm UTC (link)
Why am I sad? Because it means I haven't managed to completely kill off the brain cells that once learned that we should technically have been charging about six cents for extra lettuce on things, which means I still remember high school.

Why is it a reasonable price? Base price of cheese + labor and overhead + minimal markup.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]sparkthatbled
2010-03-18 12:21 am UTC (link)
Well, if the choice is between more cheese for twenty cents more, or a nice big round figure to pay for... No, that would still be ridiculous...

Or maybe the cheese ration on the McDouble is enough to cover the extra cost of a Double Cheeseburger, but I doubt it.

(Reply to this)


[info]willywanka
2010-03-18 01:47 am UTC (link)
Would APH's America argue for the employees and the difference between the two meals, or for the customer (on the basis of always having to please them)?

(Reply to this)


[info]varethane
2010-03-18 02:10 am UTC (link)
...

the math of the cheese.

the math of the cheese

That... that's gorgeous.

(Reply to this)


[info]puipui
2010-03-18 02:30 am UTC (link)
I understand the math of the cheese, I really do.

I love this sentence so much. *loves*

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]overlord_mordax
2010-03-18 03:34 am UTC (link)
Photobucket

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]puipui
2010-03-18 04:02 am UTC (link)
You were faster than me. :(

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]librarianmouse
2010-03-18 05:51 am UTC (link)
Why yes, I do believe I need this. :D

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]jkefka
2010-03-18 03:18 pm UTC (link)
*ker-gank*

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]theelusiven
2010-03-18 03:33 pm UTC (link)
And better than mine--I take it now.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]paladin
2010-03-18 09:51 pm UTC (link)
I couldn't get my idea to work...getting all of the image that I wanted rendered the text illegible. :(

A Beautiful Icon

A Beautiful Macro

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]innocentsmith
2010-03-18 04:19 am UTC (link)
It's a quote from the lesser known sequel to Catcher in the Rye in which Holden Caulfield pretends to know several rocket scientists and refuses to eat fast food because it's "phoney."

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]sistercoyote
2010-03-18 05:07 pm UTC (link)
"I do not wear the cheese. The cheese wears me."

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]keleri
2010-03-18 03:29 am UTC (link)
Is the math of the cheese similar to the heart of the cards?

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]cinnamonical
2010-03-18 05:10 am UTC (link)
You must believe in the math of the cheese!

I so want to see that on YGO Abridged now.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]spawn_of_kong
2010-03-18 03:43 am UTC (link)
I have nothing to say other than I love your Being Human icon.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]theelusiven
2010-03-18 05:22 am UTC (link)
Thanks! It came from here.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]chibikaijuu
2010-03-18 06:31 am UTC (link)
I wear the cheese, it does not wear me.

(Reply to this)


[info]trinka
2010-03-18 07:29 am UTC (link)
Behold, an offset thread of the wank that devolves into an argument about the realness of cheese~

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]lady_ganesh
2010-03-24 07:15 pm UTC (link)
That was pretty beautiful.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]phosfate
2010-03-18 02:44 pm UTC (link)
Psh. It's McDonalds. Like you're going to get the correct number of patties and cheese slices no matter which one you order.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]lady_ganesh
2010-03-24 07:16 pm UTC (link)
In this economy? The reliability of fast food burgers has risen dramatically.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


 
   
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