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platedlizard ([info]platedlizard) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2010-12-07 14:21:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:food, trolls

That's not frosting on the cinnamon buns!
Since tetradecimal took the bullet for me, AND my finals are over, I bring you beautiful, wonderful, lovely Cinnabon wank.

Over on Bad Service unbrokenwings posts a recent story about running into a debit card minimum at Cinnabon while purchasing a drink. She works under hot lights and gets thirsty, and Cinnabon has the biggest, cheapest drinks. unbrokenwings usually only purchases drinks there because she has a wheat allergy and cinnamon buns make her want to hurl. Fair enough, right?

Well, sjaustin is not going to let that stand! How dare unbrokenwings go into a place that sells products she finds nauseating to buy other products she likes! Even after unbrokenwings says she finds most other places that sell food to have the same effect on her, sjaustin is still unrepentant!

I'm arguing with you because you're contradicting yourself all over the place. Slow day? No, it's called "lunch." Most people who work those cushy office jobs get a whole hour in the middle of the day to do with as we please.

Gosh, you would think the food at every place being nauseating would be more motivation for you to bring your own drinks. Maybe you're exaggerating just a bit?

darsynia tries to use logic, but it is of no use!

Dear God this is so beautiful, I think I might cry.

And then, to add a beautiful wank topping to the wank-cake, the wank is posted to SF_Drama and sjaustin shows up in the comments!

And then I dance around in circles because I know a wank like this mean CINNAMON BUN RECIPES IN THE COMMENTS AND ALSO I GOT 20 OUT OF 19 ON MY ENGLISH FINAL YAY!!!!
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[info]moonjaguar
2010-12-08 07:17 am UTC (link)
The stench of cinnamon makes me feel like hurling (gross story behind it, in three words: Servicemaster's hazard team) so even though I don't have wheat issues, I can sympathize with not wanting to buy a bunch of cinnamon rolls.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]komorebi
2010-12-08 07:29 am UTC (link)
I Googled 'Servicemaster' and got a lawn care website. Since cinnamon supposedly repels ants, I imagined some sort of spice-related bug kill gone horribly wrong.

... yes, you totally needed to know that. Exactly. Um. Hi.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]moonjaguar
2010-12-08 07:57 am UTC (link)
I WISH IT WAS A BUG KILL GONE HORRIBLY WRONG!! (it wasn't a dead bug).

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]platedlizard
2010-12-08 08:56 am UTC (link)
Apparently that type of learning (eating something, getting sick, and vomiting, and then hating that food forever even if you liked it before) is actually the strongest type of learning we have. It only takes one exposure to learn that lesson.

Although, fun fact, vampire bats are incapable of learning that way.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lied_ohne_worte
2010-12-08 10:00 am UTC (link)
Apparently that type of learning (eating something, getting sick, and vomiting, and then hating that food forever even if you liked it before) is actually the strongest type of learning we have

Doesn't surprise me at all (and probably makes a lot of sense evolution-wise, too). I had one of these with salted peanuts, and while I can eat the peanuts again, I can't eat the small bits that fell off into the tin. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even the peanuts at all, but rather an actual infection that broke through at the same time, but my body doesn't care at all.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]bitca
2010-12-08 01:44 pm UTC (link)
Took my YEARS before I would touch shishkabob again, after getting sick afterwards as a kid. No relation to the food, just flu.

Then there was the time I ate potato skins and got drunk, and vomited up most of it. Yeah, I still have trouble with potato skins.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]blue_penguin
2010-12-08 02:17 pm UTC (link)
This ruined ramen for me when I was in college. ... Which was probably better for my health in the long run, come to think of it, even though the sick-getting was the result of a really nasty stomach bug and not the food itself.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]ecchaniz0r
2010-12-08 02:23 pm UTC (link)
I wish I was like a vampire bat thus; I could still eat Froot Loops if I was. *sigh*

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]librarianmouse, 2010-12-09 06:17 am UTC

[info]magnolia_mama
2010-12-08 02:44 pm UTC (link)
Yup. I haven't let rum past my lips in over 20 years, thanks to the night I spent hunched over in my friend's yard after one a dozen too many rum & Cokes.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]aaron_agonistes, 2010-12-08 09:58 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]grrliz, 2010-12-09 02:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]dejla, 2010-12-09 06:03 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]evil_kimba, 2010-12-13 02:27 am UTC

[info]snarkhunter
2010-12-08 02:48 pm UTC (link)
Crinkle fries (not all fries--just crinkle fries, thanks to a badly-timed bout of a 24-hour stomach bug after a dinner of crinkle fries in college) and Chardonnay. The latter because of something I only refer to as "The Chardonnay Incident." (To be fair, it was probably the subsequent tequila that did it, but it was the Chardonnay I remember vomiting up.)

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]jat_sapphire, 2010-12-08 10:34 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]frequentmouse, 2010-12-11 01:41 am UTC

[info]shinysandals
2010-12-08 03:35 pm UTC (link)
Twenty years later, if I even see a box of Basic 4 cereal at the store, I cringe away because of this very thing. Also too many tequila shots at my friend's house several years ago = no more margaritas ever.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]shinga, 2010-12-08 08:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]persona, 2010-12-08 08:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]queencallipygos, 2010-12-08 04:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]edelweiss, 2010-12-08 04:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]missdaisy, 2010-12-08 04:57 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mcity, 2010-12-09 06:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]thoms, 2010-12-08 06:54 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]persona, 2010-12-08 07:26 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]bienegold, 2010-12-08 08:39 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sgaana, 2010-12-08 10:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]persona, 2010-12-08 11:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]coffeebun, 2010-12-09 01:20 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]greenling, 2010-12-09 08:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]braisinhussy, 2010-12-10 07:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]empy, 2010-12-08 09:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ellensmithee, 2010-12-08 09:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]empy, 2010-12-08 09:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sleepyjean, 2010-12-09 01:33 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]empy, 2010-12-09 07:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sandglass, 2010-12-10 12:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]annabelle_lee, 2010-12-08 09:18 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sepiamagpie, 2010-12-09 12:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]risha, 2010-12-09 03:49 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]demonoflight, 2010-12-09 12:26 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ardath_rekha, 2010-12-12 07:37 pm UTC

[info]hysteria
2010-12-08 11:37 am UTC (link)
I thought I was the only one! People look at me strangely when I hold my breath around anything with cinnamon. :(

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]magnolia_mama
2010-12-08 02:42 pm UTC (link)
I can sympathize. When I was pregnant, I developed a powerful aversion to the smell of sugar. This might not have been a problem if I didn't live near a donut shop. I always knew when they were making a fresh batch, because I'd be clutching the commode.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]jaythenerdkid
2010-12-08 09:01 pm UTC (link)
Basic white toothpaste does that to me. I remember once when I was little, I tried to swallow it, and promptly threw it up (unbeknownst to me, I was coming down with a stomach bug). Now, the smell and texture of it make me cringe a little.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]jar
2010-12-08 09:28 am UTC (link)
I swear I know the name "sjaustin" from a previous wank or something. I call troll.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]ilinana
2010-12-08 04:49 pm UTC (link)
Here's a link sjaustin posted at SF_D.

And another

So maybe from either of those?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]persona, 2010-12-08 07:18 pm UTC

[info]wankaholic
2010-12-08 10:37 pm UTC (link)
She's a known troll, yes.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]brennalarose
2010-12-08 04:14 pm UTC (link)
All I could think of when I read this was Ax going, "Cinnamon bunnnnnz. BUNZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ."

(Reply to this)


[info]coquelicot
2010-12-09 06:27 am UTC (link)
I like my cinnamon rolls with just a drabble of frosting icing.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]mooncalf
2010-12-09 10:31 am UTC (link)
That had better be exactly one hundred smears of icing frosting, young lady.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]mcity
2010-12-09 06:12 pm UTC (link)
Can someone who is familar with bipolar disorder tell me if SJAustin matches the symptoms, even loosely? Or are they just kind of a jerk?

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]persona
2010-12-09 08:09 pm UTC (link)
Because speculating about someone's mental state is totes appropriate. It's not even slightly relevant if she's bipolar or not.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]mcity, 2010-12-09 08:15 pm UTC

[info]aegflota
2010-12-12 10:27 am UTC (link)
How the fuck would we know? Trolling is trolling, not evidence of mental illness.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

Coming late to the party, but bringing recipes
[info]kelmendi
2010-12-14 08:56 pm UTC (link)
After making these, no other cinnamon roll can satisfy me.

Added advantage: it makes a metric shitload, and you can freeze them with little baggies of icing, thaw, warm in the oven, cover with icing, and presto - fresh cinnamon rolls! Mmmm!

Pioneer Woman's Cinnamon Rolls

Ingredients

* 1 quart Whole Milk
* 1 cup Vegetable Oil
* 1 cup Sugar
* 2 packages Active Dry Yeast
* 8 cups (Plus 1 Cup Extra, Separated) All-purpose Flour
* 1 teaspoon (heaping) Baking Powder
* 1 teaspoon (scant) Baking Soda
* 1 Tablespoon (heaping) Salt
* Plenty Of Melted Butter
* 2 cups Sugar
* Generous Sprinkling Of Cinnamon
* _____
* MAPLE FROSTING:
* 1 bag Powdered Sugar
* 2 teaspoons Maple Flavoring
* ½ cups Milk
* ¼ cups Melted Butter
* ¼ cups Brewed Coffee
* ⅛ teaspoons Salt

Preparation Instructions

Mix the milk, vegetable oil and sugar in a pan. Scald the mixture (heat until just before the boiling point). Turn off heat and leave to cool 45 minutes to 1 hour. When the mixture is lukewarm to warm, but NOT hot, sprinkle in both packages of Active Dry Yeast. Let this sit for a minute. Then add 8 cups of all-purpose flour. Stir mixture together. Cover and let rise for at least an hour.

After rising for at least an hour, add 1 more cup of flour, the baking powder, baking soda and salt. Stir mixture together. (At this point, you could cover the dough and put it in the fridge until you need it – overnight or even a day or two, if necessary. Just keep your eye on it and if it starts to overflow out of the pan, just punch it down).

When ready to prepare rolls: Sprinkle rolling surface generously with flour. Take half the dough and form a rough rectangle. Then roll the dough thin, maintaining a general rectangular shape. Drizzle 1/2 to 1 cup melted butter over the dough. Now sprinkle 1 cup of sugar over the butter followed by a generous sprinkling of cinnamon.

Now, starting at the opposite end, begin rolling the dough in a neat line toward you. Keep the roll relatively tight as you go. Next, pinch the seam of the roll to seal it.

Spread 1 tablespoon of melted butter in a seven inch round foil cake or pie pan. Then begin cutting the rolls approximately ¾ to 1 inch thick and laying them in the buttered pans.

Repeat this process with the other half of the dough. Let the rolls rise for 20 to 30 minutes, then bake at 400 degrees (see note below) until light golden brown, about 15 to 18 minutes.

For the frosting, mix together all ingredients listed and stir well until smooth. It should be thick but pourable. Taste and adjust as needed. Generously drizzle over the warm rolls. Go crazy and don’t skimp on the frosting.

Note: My rolls don’t work for me at 400 degrees anymore. I now bake them at 375 degrees.

(Reply to this)


[info]mochibuni
2010-12-24 05:09 pm UTC (link)
I can deal with trolls like sj here, but the fucking mods like manda babylon and silver dragon are a different story. Sj is shitty, but trolly mods put me off from those comms entirely, which makes me sad because I liked them for the most part.

(Reply to this)
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