Entry tags:

defensiveness ahoy, food, it's not easy wanking green, let them eat cake, otf_wank's thoughts on weight

The Serious Side of Salad
Once upon a time, someone in facebook posted a "Why Geeks Make Better Boyfriends" list. Britney St. Patience felt the need to point out its inaccuracies. She prefaces it with "Sure there are geek guys out there who are great partners. But being a geek does not guarantee that a guy will be a great boyfriend."

It's a pretty standard 'Nice Guy' deconstruction.

The main highlights are:

Myth #3: Geeks are low maintenance
Supposedly geek guys make great boyfriends because they can subsist on pizza, Mt Dew, and your affection. Just wait until you meet one who will ONLY eat pizza and maybe 3-4 other foods, like some sort of overgrown five year old. It took me nearly a decade to get my computer programmer ex husband to eat salad. My Star Wars obsessed ex boyfriend could not be taken to nice restaurants because he refused to wear anything except ripped jeans and nerdy tees and would not eat anything he could not pronounce. LOW MAINTENANCE MY ASS.

and

Myth #6: Geeks appreciate women
This one is, by far, my favorite geek guy myth. The myth of the guy who spent all of high school playing D&D but secretly wanting someone to love and when he finally gets a girl he imprints on her and covers her in puppy-like devotion. OMG WHERE DO PEOPLE GET THIS SHIT? You know what really happens when guys don't get laid in high school or college and spend all their time reading coming books and filling their spank banks with Buffy the Vampire Slayer fanfic? They fill their little nerd brains with unrealistic expectations, waiting around for what one of my gamer friends calls a "magical pixie girl". An unattainably hot woman, who will love the nerd boy not in spite of his nerdiness but because of it and somehow his life will be transformed by her love. And he shall get a job. And he shall move out of his parents basement. And he shall cease to be whatever it is he dislikes about himself because the magical lady doth love him. But woe to any girl who does not live up to his fantasy. She will be treated with the same regard as yesterday's Mt Dew cans.

So, a little harsh, but all in all not a matter for anger, right? Wrong!

It gets posted to Metaquotes, and it starts to get weird.

First, the appetizer of rebuttals that only confirm the post.

The myth of the guy who spent all of high school playing D&D but secretly wanting someone to love and when he finally gets a girl he imprints on her and covers her in puppy-like devotion. OMG WHERE DO PEOPLE GET THIS SHIT?"

They get it from reality. That described me perfectly. It happened. It still happens. She completely ripped out my heart and shit in the hole eventually, and I got over this pattern... but it happens. That's where people get the idea.

The OP is demanding, high maintenance, dissatisfied with all the men out there... and yet continues to put herself into relationships with people SHE DOESN'T LIKE in some misguided attempt to make them into something she does like.

Of course it doesn't work, millions of people can tell you that (and probably did), and now she's bitter as a result of her mistakes, and is shifting the blame onto a large and diverse demographic that, in the aggregate, does NOT actually fit all the stereotypes she is perpetuating about them.

But then Candidgamera shows up and he Does. Not. Like. Salad.

If the girl I was dating was bizarrely fixated on me eating a salad, it wouldn't take me ten years to dump her sorry ass.

Making your husband eat a salad makes you a controlling harpy.

What follows is an extended debate over whether asking your spouse to eat salad is controlling, an act of deepest love for your dearest one, or something in between. Over salad.

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	anthologia 2011-10-13 07:42 pm UTC (link)
	I keep reading about this wank when I'm hungry/trying to decide what snack to have before my class-which-takes-place-during-dinnertime. THIS POST NEEDS A RECIPE THREAD. (Reply to this)(Thread)

anthologia
2011-10-13 07:47 pm UTC (link)

Oh, also, because the links upthread have reminded me: once upon a time, I was browsing the journalfen comms and I found a link to an awesome collaborative blog thing about people who have had serious issues with the medical industry because of their weight (like having their actual problems go undiagnosed because JUST LOSE WEIGHT AND YOU'LL BE BETTER AMIRITE?). And then, like an idiot, I lost the link. Does anyone know where/what this was? :|a

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	brennalarose 2011-10-13 07:58 pm UTC (link)
	Sounds like http://fathealth.wordpress.com/ (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	anthologia 2011-10-13 11:37 pm UTC (link)
	Yes! Thank you! \o/ (Reply to this)(Parent)

ekaterinv
2011-10-14 05:00 am UTC (link)

My back problems went undiagnosed for a while because the first doctor I went to said my real issue was that I was depressed because I was fat. My BMI was in the low end of the "overweight" category. When I finally found a doctor who would send me to get an MRI (after my back problems got so bad that I ended up on the bathroom floor, screaming in pain and unable to move), they found that I had 3 herniated disks, two digging into my spinal cord.

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	ninwhore 2011-10-13 08:07 pm UTC (link)
	RECIPES YOU SAY In keeping with the season of fairly cheap pumpkins, I offer you pumpkin curry. It's more sweet than spicy though, so if you're a fan of spice you're going to need to add something to give it that real kick. It's really good though. This is the second year I've made it and everyone (Aside from dad who hates gourds) really likes it. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	yomikoreadman 2011-10-14 02:45 pm UTC (link)
	Thanks for linking that! I was just wondering what I was going to do with all the pumpkins in the front yard. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	footsie 2011-10-13 08:26 pm UTC (link)
	A recipe thread with SALADS in it. I have an easy one. It involves tomatoes, whole basil leaves, wet mozzarella, and really good olive oil. Slice, layer, drizzle, eat. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	visp 2011-10-13 08:58 pm UTC (link)
	Add some balsamic vinegar and a little garlic to the olive oil. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	footsie 2011-10-13 09:10 pm UTC (link)
	I think it's traditionally only the four ingredients I named... but screw tradition, that sounds really good too. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	ladyvyola 2011-10-13 11:38 pm UTC (link)
	My neighborhood Italian place does the balsamic and sliced artichoke hearts. It is <3. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	rosehiptea 2011-10-14 03:33 am UTC (link)
	I wonder if I could put in the artichoke hearts and skip the mozzarella... (Reply to this)(Parent)

	footsie 2011-10-14 04:30 am UTC (link)
	Ooh, must try that! (And completely unrelated, but I made Peach Melba for the first time recently. It's amazing, and not difficult to make.) (Reply to this)(Parent)

	cygnia 2011-10-15 01:22 am UTC (link)
	I put a dash of sea salt on that as well. :) (Reply to this)(Parent)

undomielregina
2011-10-14 12:29 am UTC (link)

Larb (salad for the carnivorous)

2lbs ground chicken
1c chicken broth
A few shallots, sliced thin
a few Thai chiles, sliced (you can probably substitute serranos, but I think jalapenos would throw off the flavor)
the white and pale-green parts of a bunch of scallions, sliced thin
3-4 cloves garlic, minced
lemongrass, if you have it, if not it's no big deal

heat the broth in a skillet, add the other ingredients, cook until the chicken is cooked through and there's very little liquid left in the pan. Be sure to break up the meat into small bits.

add any combination of the following to a bowl:

cashews or peanuts, about 1/2c
fresh ginger root, julienned, about 1/2c
cilantro, roughly chopped, about 1c
fresh mint, roughly chopped
1 red onion, sliced fairly thick
the dark green parts of the bunch of scallions
a few more sliced Thai chiles

I would never make it without the cilantro, onion and chiles, but that's largely personal preference.

in a separate container combine

1c lime juice
about 1/3c fish sauce
1Tbsp plus 1 tsp sugar
about 1 to 1 1/2 Tbsp Thai red chile paste.

add meat mixture to the bowl of raw ingredients and stir. pour dressing over the salad and stir again to make sure everything is coated.

This should serve about 4 as a main course although my husband and I often eat it all in a sitting if I don't make side dishes. It also makes an excellent appetizer before curry (see next recipe).

Thai Red Curry

(this recipe makes a ton, because I like to have leftovers.)

3-4 Tbsp red curry paste
4-6 cloves garlic
2 cans low fat coconut milk
1 can full-fat coconut milk (I find using all full-fat makes it too creamy)
3 bouillon cubes (adding broth makes it too watery, so this adds flavor)
2-3 Tbsp. fish sauce
1 handful chopped cilantro
2 chicken breasts sliced, the smallest you can find -- usually, this is about 0.75-0.8 lbs. if you want to use other meat
1 c sliced yellow onion
sliced or chopped vegetables (I use mushrooms, bamboo, zucchini, snow peas, green beans, and red bell pepper, but almost anything will taste good.)

add a little oil to a saute pan, then add the curry paste and garlic. and cook for a while on medium-high.

add the coconut milk, bouillon cubes, and fish sauce and heat at medium until bubbling. You can add lemongrass as well if you have it

add the chicken and cilantro and simmer until chicken is cooked through

if you're making extra, this is where I usually ladle out some of the broth, since re-heating the finished curry overcooks the vegetables.

add the onions and vegetables. Onions and anything else that requires longer to cook like bamboo should go in first. I usually add things in three stages, finishing with the pepper which I only let get barely warm.

Serve with rice

Feed 2 hungry people for two days, probably three if they're more moderate eaters than my husband and I.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

undomielregina
2011-10-14 12:47 am UTC (link)

Oh, I totally meant to note but then forgot that these recipes are incredibly flexible. If there are things in them you don't like or can't get you should be fine substituting or leaving that thing out entirely.

Also, I noticed that neither of these recipes add salt or pepper -- pepper is unnecessary in both cases and I think the fish sauce and bouillon/broth add enough salt on their own, but the curry might need some extra.

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	ekaterinv 2011-10-14 02:57 am UTC (link)
	I have that with a balsamic reduction instead of the olive oil. So good. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	ekaterinv 2011-10-14 02:32 am UTC (link)
	Spinach, strawberries, almond slivers, fresh grated parmesan cheese (from a hunk of it), white balsamic vinaigrette (1/2 white balsamic vinegar, 1/2 extra virgin olive oil, a little dry mustard, a smidge of honey). Grate fresh pepper on salad after it's assembled. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	tehrin 2011-10-14 05:49 am UTC (link)
	No pizza or Mt. Dew. That's too high maintenance. (Reply to this)(Parent)

veneotaqueen
2011-10-14 11:52 am UTC (link)

A recipe, a recipe with salad? Patacones! Exotic to you, but exceedingly common here.

Patacón con Queso de La Guaira
INGREDIENTS
Green plantains (not bananas, plantains - say your Spanish-speaking grocer that they are for "Tostones") One big plantain can serve 2-4, depending on how big the plantain and how hungry the people.
Frying oil (corn or sunflower seed, as long as they have no strong flavor)
Coleslaw (or a mix of raw/al dente cabbage and raw carrot shredded very fine)
Chicken breast, grilled until white inside and cut in strips, kept hot (optional but not really)
White cheese (the exact kind of cheese I don't think can be easily obtainable abroad here. A pasteurized white cheese who doesn't melt easily and can be grated coarsely without resembling ricotta will do)
Mayo and ketchup.
Salt

PREPARATION
Peel your plantain and cut it on half longitudinally. If your pan is too small, you can cut those by halves.
Fry those in hot oil until it change color, then took them off and flatten them with a mace or anything heavy (a meat tenderizer can do the work), then throw the flattened plantain back to the pan and fry until golden and crispy in the edges. Drain the excess oil and salt lightly.
Now you have gigantic tostones!
Over each tostón, put a layer of coleslaw with a tiny bit of mayo for cohesion purposes, the grilled chicken strips, and finally cover it with cheese until it looks like it was snowed. Add as much ketchup and mayo as you like. Serve immediately.

Now you have a patacón as eaten in the beautiful Venezuelan beaches and Maracaibo street vendors! You can substitute the chicken with pulled pork and pulled beef, lettuce instead of coleslaw, add mustard and Golf sauce, add avocado and mojito sauce... You can even make the tostones smaller, by first cutting it in chunky slices and applying the same procedure (fry, flat, fry again).

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nifflet
2011-10-14 02:54 pm UTC (link)

Just made these last night in a "clean out my fridge" kind of mood:

STUFFED BABY PEPPERS

Assorted baby sweet peppers (I buy the kind that comes in a huge 2 lb. bag, they're red, yellow, orange, and about two inches long)

3/4 cup ricotta cheese (whole milk, please, or it'll turn out a little grainy and not as creamy)

1/3 cup grated mozzarella (my original recipe called for parmesan, but I'm a big fan of gooey)

3 slices of bacon, fried crisp and crumbled

1/2 cup frozen peas

1/2 medium yellow onion, chopped small

A tablespoon of bread crumbs (optional, but sometimes I just want to round out the food pyramid)

Fry onion in bacon drippings until acceptably soft. Off the heat, dump the peas into the pan. This serves the dual purpose of thawing the peas and cooling down the onion. While that's cooling/thawing, cut the stems off the peppers and remove the seeds and ribs. Depending on the size of your peppers, you'll probably need anywhere from 20 to 24 to use all the filling.

Combine everything except the peppers in a bowl and mix until combined. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Stuff the peppers (but go easy, because the filling tend to leak). Spray a baking sheet with cooking spray and arrange peppers on it. Place in the middle rack of a 325F oven and bake for 15 minutes or so until the peppers are soft. Serve!

On the less classy side of things, my favorite trashy snack in the world is popping a bag of popcorn and then, when it's fresh and hot, emptying a box of chocolate-covered peanuts inside and letting them melt. OM NOM NOM.

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	shark 2011-10-15 04:47 pm UTC (link)
	My LJ/RL friend linked me to http://www.chew.hu which has a large repository of Hungarian recipes in English and oh my god I am in heaven. (Reply to this)(Parent)

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