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seiberwing ([info]seiberwing) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2011-11-18 18:05:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:bad service, education

Customer service: You are doing it so, so very wrong.
Meet The Extra Reading Company, a "library of unique and amazing educational documents to which users can subscribe for access." Unique would indeed be the word, as Bridget Scanlon recently discovered (note: contains ableist slurs). Her price offer for a subscription to their website was met with ruder and more bizarre responses that probably took far more effort to write than a simple 'no. thank you' would have.

Bridget doesn't take this unprofessional behavior well, and word spreads. A post about the issue is made on Reddit, where it is discovered that the company has also been taking artwork from DeviantArt to use in their content. Joshua Mason, head of the company and increasingly suspected to also be the entirety of its staff, makes a post to the thread in an attempt to justify himself. It...does not so much justify as explain a few things about this company's PR policies.


This is the founder of The Extra Reading Company, Joshua S. Mason.

I'll tell you guys and gals like it is. Bridget lied to us--saying she couldn't afford to pay a measly $15 more for her YEAR'S subscription to our website and then, when we gave her some straightforward financial advice based on her lie, she reacted in an overly-emotional fashion. In response to that, we mocked her. She deserved it, on account of her bitchiness. End of story.

When we have customers who react STUPIDLY by making INCORRECT ASSUMPTIONS to our attempts to help them, and then REFUSE TO LISTEN to us telling them that they inferred the "tone" of the message incorrectly, they no longer deserve respect. We reserve that for customers, and prospective customers, who are capable of discussing an issue with logic and reason, as opposed to "menstruating all over the place" emotion (my wife especially loves this comment :)Authors of messages are in the VERY BEST position to tell you if you are wrong about the tone of written communication. BRIDGET stubbornly refused to heed this little nugget of truth. Why? She let her emotions control her response like a less-evolved person. Truth be told, I pity this sort of response.

I mean, can you believe the baseball bat that must have been stuck up her ass to make her demand we refer to her by her formal title of "Mrs. Henne." What a pissed-off little fruitcake! BRIDGET, lighten-up, sister, will you?

Now, I'm VERY surprised that BRIDGET decided to come to some craptastic online forum and bitch further about this issue. I mean, she claimed we were "harassing" her by not providing her with a name of a supervisor in our company. So, what does she do? She turns around and tries to get others to harass our staff. WTF? Is this chick out-of-her-mind with hypocrisy, or what?

What she failed to consider, in her revenge-seeking mode, is that I, and my staff, never type any words we fear will be regurgitated elsewhere. So, you can post my thoughts in 100-foot-tall letters on a billboard in Times Square for all I care. If we lose customers because of it, so be it. I'd trade a BILLION dollars to retain the ability to tell a patently WRONG customer that she needs to take a hike. However, in this case, the increased traffic to our website makes us A LOT of income. We have a deal with a major publishing company that gives us revenue based on how many hits the site receives. We feature some of their work in the members' area of the site, and they, in turn compensate us for the added exposure. So, is BRIDGET'S attempts here at teaching us a lesson an ABSOLUTE FAILURE? Answer: definitely.

Now, as I read your comments, I'm surprised to see "Deborah Markus" among them. This is a batshit crazy homeschool parent we dealt with years ago. She got overly pissy one day because we posted a message on her shitty homeschool Yahoo! group that informed them about our new business (this was years ago). This is one terribly jaded old woman. I was really hoping she'd be dead by now. Damn. Maybe someday soon, eh? We all have dreams.

Also, I LOVE the "memes" that people are creating with my picture. That is just pure awesomeness. Love it. Keep it up. E-mail them to me so that I can get a good laugh. Easier to get through the day at work when I'm laughing, that's for sure.

If you want to E-mail me accolades, or present me with an award for handing a nonsensically cranky customer her ass, here's my personal address: jmason@extrareading.com. But, please only do so if you agree with me. All of you reactionary morons that support this wayward non-customer with her misplaced outrage and ignorant sense of entitlement, please don't. I honestly couldn't care less about your support for her sheer stupidity in this matter.

BRIDGET would have rather we spoon-fed her falsely sugary-sweet customer service mumbo jumbo, than deal with her MISTAKE in an honest, straightforward fashion, as we did.

What would you rather have, dear reader, brutal honesty or a lie to PLACATE your insecurity?

That's what Bridget was after. She should really be ashamed of herself.

Other responses to comments posted on this thread:

"This conversation, is over." Totally Fight Club. Right on. Way to spot the subtle reference.

"You're mad as a hatter." I take this from an episode of Boston Legal. James Spader speaks it. Absolutely brilliant television.

I was NOT the author of the initial customer service messages to Mrs. Henne. But, I stood behind our rep and motivated her to start mocking BRIDGET for the latter messages. So, in a way, I am certainly responsible for some of it. *pats himself on the back. What can I say? I thoroughly enjoy antagonizing people who deserve it.

Although I am not autistic, nor do I have ASS BURGERS, I am most definitely narcissistic. Spot on!

Finally, as for the concerns of some of you that we are pilfering artwork for use in our materials, DON'T BE RETARDED. We take our work from many different sources and commission exactly ZERO of it. What does this mean? Well, for the most part, it means that we secure the rights to use images from artists by either asking to use them for free, or through purchase agreements, and THEN write materials to accompany said image. It's FAR CHEAPER to do this than to commission original work. We do not, and never have, credit individual artists, or writers. That said, the site is offline, and will be for a bit, as we make absolutely sure that we have the rights to all artwork being used. As the stellar executive that I am, I have directed our staff to take this very seriously. So, all of you who think you spot images we use on other websites, of course you do! We don't ask that the artists not show their work as part of their portfolios, even after we're using them. Don't be ridiculous!

Sincerely, Joshua S. Mason Founder / CEO The Extra Reading Company



It's very, very hastily deleted. But who is this fearsome hag they call Deborah Markus? She's the editor of the magazine Secular Homestchooling who's been the target of both insults and bizarre paranoia by ERC, to the point that they vandalized her magazine's Wiki page (note bottom paragraph). That saga could be a FW post in itself, but she's summarized the matter nicely. It seems they've got a habit of posing on message boards as enthusiastic teachers who talk up the company.

An anti-ERC facebook page is formed. Further plucky girl detective work turns up at least two more blatant self-promotions by alleged teachers who are most likely Joshua Mason in a flowered dress and sunhat.

The company website itself is down for about 48 hours after the story breaks, but when it returns it reveals even more problems with their idea of customer service. The only content is image files (even of their text, no idea why), but I've helpfully transcribed some of their Q&A section to demonstrate their dedication to customer service.


What is your refund policy?

All sales are final. Absolutely no exceptions. Since we offer a free document from each category of materials we publish, there isn't a conceivable reason why you would be unhappy in the slightest with your ExtraReading.com subscription after your purchase. [...] This is why we never process refunds. There's simply no need if you do your due diligence in terms of thoroughly previewing what we offer before subscribing.

"We don't offer refunds because you're stupid if you want one."

Can you re-send me a digital purchase I ordered previously?

So, if you lose your file, delete it, or your computer has a meltdown, your only option is to purchase the file again if you'd still like to use it with your students. To some, this may seem harsh. But our company is not in the business of protecting your possessions. Would you expect a publishing company to refurnish you with a copy of a hardback book when your house burns down? Of course not!

Do you align your documents with my state's learning standards?

Even with the ever-increasing adoption of the Common Core Standards, this isn't really necessary for our website. Primarily, what we offer are primary source documents. As such they can be used to toward [sic] achievement in virtually any of the standards directly related to literature. In other words, is it really necessary that we list the Common Core Standards for Literature that correspond to each document we offer? Almost all of them apply in one way or another. With this in mind, it shouldn't be too difficult for you to glance at your standards manual and quickly decide which of them are satisfied by using our documents in a particular way with your students. After all, it is our view that, as the professional teacher, you should already have a firm grasp of the learning standards under which you teach. Thus, it should not be any great hindrance for our materials to not be identifiably labeled with the multiple Common Core Standards any one document could be used to satisfy.

And the question which seems to support the one-man-company theory, How can I contact the Extra Reading Company by telephone?

You can't. There isn't a conceivable situation with regards to our website or materials that could require the immediacy of voice communication. As such, we avoid the expense of providing customer service by telephone altogether. Instead, our dedicated staff handles all inquiries exclusively by E-mail.


And they'd really like to help you nurture your beautiful young children's developing minds. Charming little business.



(Post a new comment)


[info]pulchritude
2011-11-19 02:30 am UTC (link)
What a smarmy douchebag. Those Q&A answers would immediately put me off buying from them, even before this wank.

(Reply to this)


[info]ekaterinv
2011-11-19 03:18 am UTC (link)
I think you need to add warnings for misogyny on this, for everything coming from the ERC person/people, but particularly the part where he talks about "bitchiness" and "menstruating all over the place". That first e-mail exchange -- I've never seen anything like it, on the part of the ERC person. Sexism, classism, anti-teacher bias, all wrapped up in one smarmy package. I never thought any actual person would be so like Buck from the Left Behind series. I'm depressed that I've been proven wrong.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]seiberwing
2011-11-19 03:47 am UTC (link)
The cut has been altered. Pray I do not alter it further.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]ghostmaster
2011-11-19 04:02 am UTC (link)
It reminded me of this one Bentley Little novel I read about an evil occult insurance company. Whoever was writing those emails sounded almost exactly like the insurance agent who kept harassing the protagonists.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]gertie_flirty
2011-11-19 03:27 am UTC (link)
What the actual fuck. How are they even a real company?

Listen, I know "the customer is always right" can be bullshit, but taking it in the exact opposite direction is also a bad decision.

I've never seen a company so willing to drive away customers.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]librarianmouse
2011-11-19 03:46 am UTC (link)
And what are the odds that he spends his free time complaining "Why don't people subscribe to my website? Are they stupid?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]notjo
2011-11-19 03:27 am UTC (link)
"primary source documents"

Do they actually offer primary source documents or does he not know what primary source documents are?

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]visp
2011-11-19 04:08 am UTC (link)
Somehow I'm guessing the latter.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]the__ivorytower
2011-11-19 03:58 am UTC (link)
Wooooooow that guy is an asshole. I just... I... having read the exchange, that woman was unbelievably patient and far more polite than I would have been.

(Reply to this)


[info]rosehiptea
2011-11-19 03:59 am UTC (link)
What the hell does this company actually do besides insult people? These e-mails read like a Monty Python routine.

They could be offering Shakespeare's secret smut diary and I wouldn't pay them money to read it.

(Reply to this)


[info]visp
2011-11-19 04:01 am UTC (link)
ERC: I think you GREATLY misunderstood the intent of my response. It was to be helpful, not “condescending.” So, this has been an incorrect inference on your part altogether. You were treated wonderfully.

I... just... what? "Wow, you thought I was condescending? Let me vomit condescending blather all over the place to show you how wrong you were."

That bit was funny. The rest got rage-inducing pretty quick.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]the__ivorytower
2011-11-19 04:10 am UTC (link)
The part that really gets me is the way he constantly types her first name, more often than I do in my RP dialogue, and a lot of the time it's in caps. It's like he's fucking *taunting* her with it. "Haha, you hate this don't you. You can't stop me from typing it."

People like him make me wish I could administer mild, dissuasive shocks through peoples' keyboards. Or, you know, punch them through my monitor.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]caffeine_fairy
2011-11-19 11:05 pm UTC (link)
I'm holding out for firing Lego with my shift key

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]seraangelus
2011-11-21 12:29 am UTC (link)
It's exactly what he's doing. Probably also trying to be intimidating as well, since a lot of people don't like their real names online.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]varethane
2011-11-19 04:30 am UTC (link)
If you want to E-mail me accolades, or present me with an award for handing a nonsensically cranky customer her ass, here's my personal address: jmason@extrareading.com. But, please only do so if you agree with me

I got to here and then became convinced that this dude was a troll.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]rosehiptea
2011-11-19 06:37 am UTC (link)
That occurred to me too.

It would be a pretty funny story if this guy is actually some disgruntled ex-employee trying to make them look bad. I doubt it, though.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]phasmas
2011-11-19 03:15 pm UTC (link)
*stares*

...Wow. He really has no idea how life in general the internet works, does he?

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]risha
2011-11-19 07:25 am UTC (link)
I find it hilarious that he apparently at one point decided that everyone with a gmail address was in cahoots with Deborah Markus.

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[info]feenix
2011-11-19 03:53 pm UTC (link)
*looks at own GMail address*

Man, I can't keep up with this. Between being MsScribe, Caito, and Misha Collins, I can't be Deborah Markus too!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]karmyn75
2011-11-20 06:30 pm UTC (link)
But are you also Danneel Harris Ackles?

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[info]cmdr_zoom
2011-11-20 09:43 pm UTC (link)
bah, everyone knows she's just an actress hired to be Jensen's beard.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]feenix
2011-11-21 01:17 am UTC (link)
Actually, I'm Genevieve. But thanks for playing!

(By the way, the sex with Jared is fantastic, thankyouverymuch.)

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]sukeban
2011-11-19 11:16 am UTC (link)
Wow. What a prize winner.

(Reply to this)


[info]sepiamagpie
2011-11-19 02:45 pm UTC (link)
I'm sorta hoping their stolen deviant art images are Sonic vore porn.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]rosehiptea
2011-11-19 07:18 pm UTC (link)
I'm sorta hoping they belong to a couple of people I follow who have their stuff stolen a lot and would be prepared to give them massive shit over it.

(But yours is even better...)

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]jerel
2011-11-19 03:02 pm UTC (link)
I am currently on long term assignment at a middle school. I looked at one of the free documents with my Teacher Eyes. (My teacher eyes are different than my regular eyes, because my Teacher Eyes can stop misbehavior before it starts.) The story was okay. But this is marketed to 4th to 8th? No. Just...no. I would say it's a 2nd grade reading level, which yes, you have 4th graders reading below grade level. But the *sensibility* is low elementary. I know exactly what my ESE students would say: "That was dumb." [They wouldn't say "retarded," because they know that induces RAGE in Mrs. Jerel.]

Each story has 3 discussion questions. The questions were good. They were things like "if you were a character in this story, what would you do?" or in a story about a dinosaur "Would you want a dinosaur for a pet? Why or why not?" But frankly, most competent teachers would have come up with the same questions.

So, substandard materials and the "CEO" is a special brand of asshole. Okay!

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]caffeine_fairy
2011-11-20 09:11 pm UTC (link)
I now demand that you grade this company, using your teacher eyes and maybe a red pen.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]caitiedid
2011-11-19 03:26 pm UTC (link)
What she failed to consider, in her revenge-seeking mode, is that I, and my staff, never type any words we fear will be regurgitated elsewhere. So, you can post my thoughts in 100-foot-tall letters on a billboard in Times Square for all I care. If we lose customers because of it, so be it.

And then he deleted the post. OK!

Seriously, what is wrong with this company/this guy (I think it's safe to say that this guy is the company)? I've never seen such spectacularly awful customer service. Does he just have some compulsion to be rude?

(Reply to this)


[info]phosfate
2011-11-19 04:22 pm UTC (link)
"You're mad as a hatter." I take this from an episode of Boston Legal. James Spader speaks it. Absolutely brilliant television.

You have no business marketing educational materials.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]the__ivorytower
2011-11-19 05:02 pm UTC (link)
That upset me too. But I have beloved memories of the Alice books, though I liked Through the Looking Glass more than Wonderland.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]sepiamagpie
2011-11-19 05:32 pm UTC (link)
"Down the rabbit hole" I took this from the Sherlock Holmes movie with Robert Downey Jr. RDJ himself said it. Absolutely brilliant bit of filmmaking.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]sukeban
2011-11-19 09:12 pm UTC (link)
No, no, Morpheus said that to Neo in The Matrix.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]moongazingfae
2011-11-19 09:33 pm UTC (link)
brb collecting my eyebrows from the ceiling.

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[info]sumire
2011-11-20 12:10 am UTC (link)
Ohhh... is Joshua S. Mason trying to emulate that awful eyeglass-frames guy from the New York Times?

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[info]seiberwing
2011-11-20 12:30 am UTC (link)
I had to Google the guy to find out if he ever got his.

Oh, rapturous day.

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[info]sumire
2011-11-20 03:58 am UTC (link)
Hurrah!

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[info]fools_game
2011-11-20 04:30 am UTC (link)
They made him pay for his own house arrest.

That is beautiful. Thank you, Judge Richard J Sullivan.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]kosaginolegion
2011-11-22 12:16 pm UTC (link)
Greetings fellow sufferer. You have my complete sympathy. Especially as I come out of my every four year flare-up.

*considers self fortunate that self is spared that particular bit of 'fun'*

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[info]also_not_a_pipe
2011-11-21 05:25 am UTC (link)
Each Story Survivor tale is a 35-page, non-sequential e-book that your students read while assuming the role of the main protagonist. These stories are written in a way that allows your students to become totally immersed in the story as if the events are happening to him or her. As your students read, they make choices in response to the plot of the book in an effort to survive perilous situations.

This is serious business, guys. No one will take his knock-off Choose Your Own Adventure stories seriously if he just lets her get away with talking smack about his company like that!

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[info]sepiamagpie
2011-11-21 06:10 pm UTC (link)
"Aw man, I got 'educated' with viking axes again."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]also_not_a_pipe
2011-11-22 12:18 am UTC (link)
The free sample was some goofy thing about accidentally stealing my dad's blimp (because, apparently where I live, everyone just happens to have blimps tethered above their houses and accessible by a hatch in the roof). After dying by pigging out for no obvious reason on a box of bird seed that just happened to be in the blimp, I feel like that story was worth every penny I paid for it.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]zara_zero
2011-11-23 02:53 am UTC (link)
Wow, this description was enough to make me check this free e-book out. It's... so terrible, haha.

The birdseed is explained later as being a rudimentary defense against some sort of lethal bird-creatures. Which doesn't work, and "the birds poke you to your demise with their pointy beaks. Ouch."

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]zara_zero
2011-11-23 03:10 am UTC (link)
Okay, I think the best death in there is possibly the one where a random old man somehow hypnotises you into playing "chesseckers" with him until you literally die of boredom. Or maybe the one where the mayor, who is an angel, throws her tea at you and you melt into goo. There sure are a lot of endings involving the mayor or the cops murdering you.

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[info]seiberwing
2011-11-23 04:01 am UTC (link)
Reality subtext?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]zara_zero
2011-11-23 04:17 am UTC (link)
That was actually crossing my mind as I was reading it. The general horribleness of the book made me suspect it wasn't deliberate, but considering like half the deaths in the book seem to be "Then the police-analogues show up and shoot you to death without just cause" this could potentially be a really depressing read for a child with connections to someone shot or otherwise mistreated by the police... although apparently the cops can also be defeated if you and a couple of homeless people raise your blimp at the right moment so they all shoot each other, and then somehow you won't get in any legal trouble whatsoever over the incident. You might still end up "poked" to death by birds, though (seriously, why not just say pecked?).

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]also_not_a_pipe
2011-11-23 06:17 am UTC (link)
I'm just impressed that you read that whole thing. I only got to the part where you get to the mayor's office before I gave up on it, and I was skimming by then anyway.

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[info]zara_zero
2011-11-23 06:21 am UTC (link)
I often find bad fiction hilarious, and that was definitely the case here. Even so, I was skimming by the end as well. Then, abruptly, it ended. It was only 35 pages all up. And what crappy pages they were.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]re_weird
2011-11-23 07:34 am UTC (link)
If this happened in a novel in a parody of horrible customer service, I'd say it was too over-the-top! I love it when reality is more ridiculous than fiction can get away with.

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