Entry tags:

authorwank

His reviews, let him show you them
Courtesy of @has_bookpushers:

On first glance, this looks very similar to the YA author anti-reviewer meltdowns of last week. However, if you keep scrolling down, it becomes so much more.  

Jane Smith reviews Mike Coe's Flight to Paradise ("On the whole then, a disappointment. The hints that I saw of the writer’s talents were outweighed by his clumsy mistakes and his apparent discomfort within this genre, and I read just four pages out of three hundred and thirty five"). Mike Coe begs to differ--and according to him, so do 40+ other five-star reviewers. Let him show you them, his reviews:

Mike says: January 1, 2012 at 3:53 pm: Harvey Stanbrough (whose work has been nominated for a National Book Award, a Pulitzer Prize, a Pushcart Prize, a Frankfurt Book Fair Award, and the Inscriptions Magazine Engraver’s Award) had this to say about “Flight to Paradise”. “I’ve told only two unpublished novelists (from well over a hundred novelists and short-story authors) their work was excellent–you are the third.”

Mike says: January 1, 2012 at 3:53 pm: “…this debut novel carries the promise that another Wiregrass native is poised to become an important part of the contemporary fiction landscape.” Wiregrass Living Magazine, January/February 2011

Mike says: January 1, 2012 at 3:54 pm: Jeffrey from GEORGIA writes: “I just finished “Flight to Paradise”!!. Amazing writing and a great twist. Took me on an emotional roller coaster for sure. Loved it. Thanks so much. Can’t wait to read “Flight into Darkness”.

Mike says: January 1, 2012 at 3:55 pm: Gail from VIRGINIA writes: “I VERY much enjoyed your book. You left a lot of food for thought. I sat in silence after finishing it. I awoke the next morning still—— chewing on “thoughts” It’s that kind of book! I believe a good author will do that to you with his writings. YOU sure HIT the nail on the head with this one! Your writing is so creative and quite exciting, too. Mike, Henry Ford, said…” THINKING is hard work…that is why most don’t do it” I love that you make me think…I look so forward to watching you grow each character in the next book! GREAT JOB!!!!”

This continues for more than forty comments. I mean, according to Jane ("So you don’t consider posting over forty comments on my blog in the space of half an hour to be harassing? Hmm"); my eyes glazed over after twelve. Jane then does a little digging and confronts Mike with the fact that 1) his book only has seven reviews on Amazon; 2) Googling does not substantiate that most of the reviews he posted even exist outside his own website (or at all); 3) two of them, by his own admission, are by his mother and father-in-law; 4) at least one of them was in exchange for a good review for another writer; 5) at least one of them, he posted himself under a pseudonym. Having finished spamming the blog with individual reviews, Mike proceeds to explain himself with deer so teal that he has to preface each paragraph in his comments with "Mike:" or "Jane:" just to clarify whether he's quoting or speaking. And there are multiple comments of epic length. A teal stampede, if you will. And while he is outwardly polite, Jane points out that he keeps projecting anger issues onto her ("Here is where I detect some of that frustration and anger"; "But to be so vindictive only shows that you have anger issues over this"). Also, he keeps insisting that she should meet him in real life:

At this point, based on the frustration and touch of anger I detect in your comment, I’m afraid it would take a face-to-face meeting to FULLY dissolve your belief that I am some sort of dishonest, rebellious malcontent.

You seem to be having trouble believing me or accepting my honesty—something I’m certain a face-to-face meeting would resolve.

Finally, people other than Mike show up:

crimeficreader says: January 8, 2012 at 4:55 pm: Hello. I just thought I’d populate the comments with another new name for some variety.

Mike has not responded to any of the new commenters. He has to sleep sometime, I guess.