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El Juno ([info]eljuno) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2004-05-05 13:57:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Current music:KMFDM - Dogma

Wank in Christianity Sex

We start with this posting...

That "Mayday for Marriage" rally made the news:

http://www.cnn.com/2004/US/West/05/01/rally.gay.marriage.ap/index.html

SEATTLE, Washington (AP) -- Thousands of people protested gay marriage at a rally Saturday, but they faced hundreds of chanting, shouting counter-protesters in the city's baseball stadium Saturday.

... "This is a place where we're taking a stand," said James Dobson, founder of the evangelical Christian group Focus on the Family, told the crowd. "If this happens, the culture war is over and everything associated with it is lost."

Wow! Such drastic terms! So if gays are allowed to marry, civilization as we know it is at an end!

... "We believe marriage was designed for a man and a woman," said Bill Hanford, 46, of Redmond. "We think the biblical concept of marriage is important and people should take a stand on that side of the argument as well as the one that's in the media right now."

That's terrific! I'm glad he's standing up for what he believes in and refusing to marry someone of the same sex. I just hope he doesn't take his "I think"s and his "I believe"s and try to force them on other people.

... "Unfortunately religion has often been a tool for hatred," [Jeffrey Steinberg] said.

Amen to that.
-----------------------------

Main problem? The first comment was this.

I'm going to start a new gender that eats by shoving food up our butt instead of putting food in our mouth. That way I can get some tax breaks meant for people to raise children. I mean, why should I be descriminated against for wanting to marry someone who wants to shove sammiches up his ass? It's not only our eating preference but we were born this way. You can't control how you like to eat!


"Butts were made for pooping and that's just what they'll do. One of these days these butts are going to poop all over you." -me

605 comments later...

Don't miss the declaration that Texas is bigger than India or the Giant GIF war. There's probably more greatness, but my head hurts too much to keep wandering.


(Post a new comment)


[info]geekmagirl
2004-05-05 07:04 pm UTC (link)
...I need a nap now.

(Reply to this)


[info]shoiryu
2004-05-05 07:23 pm UTC (link)
I hate people.

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[info]lurker32
2004-05-05 08:50 pm UTC (link)
*seconds that and shares a stiff drink with you*

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]smo
2004-05-06 03:26 pm UTC (link)
I'll have what y'all are having.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]tempslut
2004-05-05 07:25 pm UTC (link)
I'm going to start a new gender that eats by shoving food up our butt instead of putting food in our mouth. That way I can get some tax breaks meant for people to raise children. I mean, why should I be descriminated against for wanting to marry someone who wants to shove sammiches up his ass? It's not only our eating preference but we were born this way. You can't control how you like to eat!

Way to rip off "South Park", Batman!

(Reply to this)


[info]sagralisse
2004-05-05 07:39 pm UTC (link)
9whatever: "Texas is bigger than India."

voz_guy: "so's your mom."

Hee!!

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]ecchaniz0r
2004-05-05 10:50 pm UTC (link)
AAAAAHAHAHAH YES!

YOUR MOM* RIDES AGAIN!

*Not your mom specifically but 'your mom'.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]rann
2004-05-05 11:14 pm UTC (link)
Your mom's so wanky, Japanese artists ask her to spray the models for their doujinshi.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]ecchaniz0r
2004-05-06 03:16 pm UTC (link)
May I have your babies? *sparkulu*

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re:
[info]rann
2004-05-06 07:34 pm UTC (link)
Yes, yes you may.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]smo
2004-05-06 03:27 pm UTC (link)
*SPORFLE!*

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]sagralisse
2004-05-05 07:43 pm UTC (link)
There's this: http://www.livejournal.com/users/9chambers/178039.html#cutid1

It's like they took the Man Show and sandblasted away all traces of the funny. :-/

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]llama_treats
2004-05-05 07:49 pm UTC (link)
Sandblasted? He napalmed the freaking show.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]sagralisse
2004-05-05 08:08 pm UTC (link)
Adam! Jimmy! Ahhh!

Oh wait. They aren't on anymore. Carry on then!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]smo
2004-05-06 03:28 pm UTC (link)
There's funny on the Man Show?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]sagralisse
2004-05-06 04:13 pm UTC (link)
I think a guy eating an entire stick of butter on national television is funny. YMMV

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]smo
2004-05-06 09:31 pm UTC (link)
Ah so. I must have changed the channel during the "girls on trampolines" segment and missed that bit.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]nicolae
2004-05-06 09:09 pm UTC (link)
This is kinda funny.

http://www.livejournal.com/users/9chambers/178039.html?thread=590711#t590711

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]melange
2004-05-05 07:47 pm UTC (link)
I'm not the kind of person who assumes that every homophobe is secretly gay. But after hearing this guy wax obsessive about buttsex, and talk about how he had to be 'forced' to like girls, I think that in a few years, we'll be seeing him trolling this very community, preaching the virtues of sticking things up your ass.

God, I hope I have the right community this time

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[info]crickets
2004-05-05 08:38 pm UTC (link)
I found a link to the RETROSEXUAL MOVEMENT. Named with not a lick o' irony intended. Ow.

Every time my TV is on, all that can be seen is effeminate men prancing about, redecorating houses and talking about foreign concepts like "style" and "feng shui."

Real men of the world, stand up, scratch your butt, belch, and yell "ENOUGH!" I hereby announce the start of a new offensive in the culture wars, the Retrosexual movement.

Did I mention he doesn't know irony from stainless steel? And he's just getting started.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]alpheratz
2004-05-05 09:00 pm UTC (link)
*facepalm*

Although, this made me giggle:

und1sk0
2004-05-05 04:08 (link)
the guy has a point.. fuck queer eye for the straight guy.. i want my chest hair and bad habits! i dont want a bathroom stocked with hair products.. i want to fart a burp.. and dammit, i want to buy my date's dinner and drinks!
(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


auntiesiannan
2004-05-05 05:21 (link)
*dips you in Nair*
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[info]rann
2004-05-05 11:18 pm UTC (link)
You know, I always want to ask these oh-so-manly men who brag about all their body hair and deride those who remove it, "If you wouldn't want to sleep with someone with a bristly black forest growing on their legs and chest, what makes you think the woman would?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


meshou
2004-05-06 04:38 am UTC (link)
... I like hairy men.

*hides*

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re:
[info]rann
2004-05-06 04:43 am UTC (link)
Well, yeah, everyone is someone else's fetish. n.n I think it's mostly this sense on the guy's part "I'm a MAN! Oh yeah, I'm MANLY! That automatically means everything about me makes a woman lust and lust hard!"

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]teratologist
2004-05-08 05:32 pm UTC (link)
While you're over there, would you ask the guy why he thinks women are turned on by stench and T-shirts that have been worn so long that there are holes rotting out of them?

I'd ask myself, but I'm afraid to get in shouting distance.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]smo
2004-05-06 03:31 pm UTC (link)
I'll bet he wants to keep his skanky old tightie whities with the skid marks, too.

And here he wonders why women never accept his dinner-and-drinks offers. It's not about whether you're hairy or not, it's about whether or not you're willing to make that extra effort to look good for someone. If this dude won't bother, what's to stop his date from showing up sans makeup, hair unwashed, in ratty old sweats, burping like an Animaniac?

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]rann
2004-05-05 11:17 pm UTC (link)
Every time my TV is on, all that can be seen is effeminate men prancing about, redecorating houses and talking about foreign concepts like "style" and "feng shui."

Maybe you should change the channel to something other than "Lifetime for Gay Men", then, Charlie.
"Every time I turn on the TV, it's just people getting naked and going 'ooo-oo' and 'ah-ahhh' and it's disgusting!"
"Well. I guess this explains our NINETY dollar cable bill this month."

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]crickets
2004-05-05 11:41 pm UTC (link)
Oops, this was the link mentioned above. *facepalm* Sorry, Sagra. D'oh!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]selene_avis
2004-05-06 02:19 am UTC (link)
Dude. I was reading that when I went, "It's Cledwyn. That describes him perfectly." (Cledywn is an antagonist from my story who holds similar, but not identical, ideals to those presented.) Except that Cledywn's gay. Oh well.</strike>

But the whole thing made me giggle, though.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]elkins
2004-05-05 09:13 pm UTC (link)
I was particularly fond of this exchange:

"Come, let us reason together" poster: Not so. India is 1,222,559 square miles. Texas is 267,277.

Silly Troll Man: Prove it.

Hee!

The bit where Silly Troll Man provides his "research" proving that women don't like anal sex as a Google search on "anal sex uncomfortable" was also a classic. This is made even more delectable by the fact that he claims in his LJ userinfo that he has "earned a BS in History."

A BS, huh? *snerk*

But really, why have I never thought of that? Just think of all of the fun things I could have "proven" back in college, utilizing this research technique!

(Now off to Google "space aliens caused fall of Roman Empire")

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]yadda
2004-05-05 09:42 pm UTC (link)
It was on The Tomorrow People! IT MUST BE TRUE!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]elkins
2004-05-05 09:54 pm UTC (link)
It was on TV!

That makes it even truer!

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[info]iczer6
2004-05-05 10:03 pm UTC (link)
Goddamn...

I think his ass has eaten his head!

Run for it!


Icz

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[info]oulangi
2004-05-05 10:23 pm UTC (link)
Fortunatly he had recently stuffed said ass with condiments and sandwich meat making his head a tasty snack that went down smooth.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]ecchaniz0r
2004-05-05 10:48 pm UTC (link)
SWEET JESUS AAAHAHAHA OW

*thonk*

Best GIF war ever.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]nicolae
2004-05-05 10:49 pm UTC (link)
Because, you know, FOOD is like PENISES.

Mmm, off to go enjoy a yummy VAGINA SANDWICH.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]llama_treats
2004-05-05 10:54 pm UTC (link)
I, for one, am offended that you didn't use the politically correct term "FISH TACO".

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[info]smo
2004-05-06 03:32 pm UTC (link)
I prefer "GOD'S LITTLE TACO," thank you very much.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]c_chan
2004-05-06 12:44 am UTC (link)
So if gays are allowed to marry, civilization as we know it is at an end!

I think civilization is already at it's end, since we let idiots like that run around.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]elkins
2004-05-06 08:19 am UTC (link)
Nah, civilization's already at an end because we allow precisely what this fuckwit's so terribly afraid of:

Should people who like to have sex with animals be allowed to marry other beastiality fans and adopt kids based solely on their sexual orientation?

Well, uh, dude, we *do* allow that. That's called "marriage for opposite-sex couples only." If the doggie lovers are a guy and a gal, they can wed. If they're a guy and a guy, or a gal and a gal, then they can't.

Nice to know that he doesn't approve of such crass heterosexism, innit? It's always *such* a pleasure when people break type.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]notjo
2004-05-07 11:08 am UTC (link)
*bangs head against wall*

I have a deepseated dislike for people who think they have some right to legislate everyone's lives. And who think they are making logical comparisons when they're not.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]theartema
2004-05-06 04:26 am UTC (link)
I'm going to start a new gender that eats by shoving food up our butt instead of putting food in our mouth.

Food like Jif?

Oh, and OP, your choice of music rocks. ^_^ -waves KMFDM banner-

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]smo
2004-05-06 07:47 pm UTC (link)
Or Vegemite. Whichever.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]greekhoop
2004-05-06 11:44 pm UTC (link)
Oh, and OP, your choice of music rocks.

Oh, it so does. Dogma's one of my favorite tunes, too.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]hylian_shadow
2004-05-06 08:10 pm UTC (link)
Hmm. Damn, I seem to have misplaced the number for the Gene Pool Cleaners... Shame. The pool has one very nasty floater in it right now...

(Reply to this)

  
   
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