(But it can't make him use the shift key consistently.)

Giles Coren would like you to know that "a" is very srs bsn:

3) And worst of all. Dumbest, deafest, shittest of all, you have removed the unstressed 'a' so that the stress that should have fallen on "nosh" is lost, and my piece ends on an unstressed syllable. When you're winding up a piece of prose, metre is crucial. Can't you hear? Can't you hear that it is wrong? It's not fucking rocket science. It's fucking pre-GCSE scansion. I have written 350 restaurant reviews for The Times and i have never ended on an unstressed syllable. Fuck. fuck, fuck, fuck.

I am sorry if this looks petty (last time i mailed a Times sub about the change of a single word i got in all sorts of trouble) but i care deeply about my work and i hate to have it fucked up by shit subbing. I have been away, you've been subbing joe and hugo and maybe they just file and fuck off and think "hey ho, it's tomorrow's fish and chips" - well, not me. I woke up at three in the morning on sunday and fucking lay there, furious, for two hours. weird, maybe. but that's how it is.

It's just his letter, but oh, it's so tasty and I love "academic" wank on a Sunday, don't you?

It all started with a list - a list of questionable literary agencies and agents. Unfortunately, someone named Barbara Bauer was on this list. This made her very, very, very, very unhappy. (So unhappy, in fact, she demanded A BILLION DOLLARS from several bloggers for her pain and suffering.) Why, oh why won't they fork over the dough? And why are they laughing? What's a poor, maligned literary agent to do? SUE WIKIPEDIA AND THE BLOGOSPHERE!, that's what. Hmmph. That'll show 'em!


Oops...DISMISSED! Wikipedia, you bastard!

(SRS BZNS ETA: I've received some additional info about the court cases that are still pending, which can be found here)