Otherwise known as "When you've nothing left to be proud of, be proud of being proud".

Last night a special edition of Location, Location, Location aired in the UK. Special because it showed the UK's top ten best and worst towns.

As you might imagine, people feel passionately about such things. And the "worst town in Britain" Middlesbrough would like the country to know it is VERY UPSET.

It starts with a Rebuttal on the BBC

( And the voices start rising )

Of course, the Beeb moderate comments which make it hard to find real wank there. No matter though, because it's hardly going to stay there.

The Middlesbrough Mayor demands that the entire North East boycott Channel 4. Also he thinks the producers should crawl to Middlesbrough on their hands and knees to beg random members of the public for an apology.

Move on to the forums of the locl paper, and folk are getting more upset.

( When Angry Northerners Fight Back )

Excitable? Pissed off? Indeed!

But it's not until you hit the Channel 4 message boards you'll see them really losing it.

( And the North and the South meet with a clang )

The UK: A very small country that spends most of its time seperating into even smaller parts so they can shout at each other.

ETA: New news links!

If you're not Nelson Mandela your opinion doesn't count anyway!

WE WILL BURN YOU IN EFFIGY!

And it's not even from Cute Overload. Sadly, this means there are no boobies involved. First off, though:

Background Info 1 - Over the past couple of years there's been a number of scandalous about shenanigans in the operation of various premium number phone-ins attached to various British TV shows, mainly on reality TV shows and quizzes.

Background Info 2 - Blue Peter is a long-running and highly respected children's programme produced by the BBC. It has winsome fresh-faced presenters, adorable pets, a garden, and regular features on how to make your own model of Hogwarts out of toilet roll tubes and sticky tape. It occupies the same place in the hearts and minds of the British public as Sesame Street does for Americans.

Got that? Good. So, Blue Peter acquires a new kitten, always a cause for celebration, and opens a phone poll for children to vote for their favourite name for the her. The kitten is subsequently named Socks, and all appears well.

BUT WAIT! Things all start to get a bit murky when it turns out that Socks was not the name chosen by Blue Peter viewers. Yes, the BBC chose a different name and fibbed about it. The producer of Blue Peter is suspended, while the British press goes into overdrive re 'Cat Flap' (as the scandal is nicknamed) and makes more pussy jokes than you could shake a catnip mouse at.

Meanwhile, over at the Guardian's ever-wanky blog section, readers slug it out over whether or not the naming of cats is serrius bizness.

( Think of the children! )

It is still unclear whether 'Socks' ought to have been named 'Pussy' or 'Cookie'. So she has three names, which should at least please Old Possum.