It's all the fault of literary agents, who are single-handedly destroying literature everywhere!

Excerpt:

The substantial and nearly unassailable wall that separates you from us has been under construction for decades. You can find the names of its architects and gatekeepers on your telephone-callers list, and in your email in-box. They are the literary agents—that league of intellectual-property purveyors who bring you every new manuscript you ever see, those men and women who are so anxious to gain access to the caverns of treasure they believe you sit upon like some great golden goose that they would likely hack one another’s heads off were they not united by one self-serving mission: to ensure that quality fiction never hits your desk.

Just a tiny bit of entitlement, elitism, and self-delusion.

And some responses...

Over on Dear Author, Jane posts about an author overreacting to bad Amazon.com reviews

The author's fans are quick to point out that Jane is just jealous, a meanie, has no life, etc. And the author herself responds. The comments have been deleted, but breecita saved them

( Pro making ass of herself under the cut )

Whiny pros! Whinier fans! Passive-aggressive smilies!

All we need is a flounce, a sobbing vow to Never Write Again, and/or a pseudocide.

ETA: Thanks to carlanime, a prequel of sorts.

ETA2: Crap, wrong link, wrong potential post. If anyone wants to write up about possibly fraudelent conniving, lying, soul-bonding-is-my-religion! roommates from hell, drop a line.

One of those things where it's really just one person (er, possibly two?) being wanky, but if you love a good plagiarism scandal as much as I do -- most particularly when the accused follows the script so familiar from fandom to the letter -- it's pretty entertaining.

So, Slate writer Jody Rosen is made aware that one of his articles has been plagiarized in a small Texas weekly called the Montgomery County Bulletin, under the byline of one "Mark Williams." Further digging (detailed in that link) turns up many, many Bulletin articles plagiarized from sources ranging from USA Today and The Guardian to (*snerk*) customer reviews on Amazon.

After this draws some attention from Gawker and the Houston Press, plus some sniffing the air catching the scent of a story by NPR and the New York Observer, Bulletin publisher Mike Ladyman is shutting down the paper, taking his toys and going home! That meanie Rosen "truly acts like the rock-and-roll or the music critic" and is guilty of "an attack, an attention-grabbing hatchet job." Even though Ladyman doesn't really deny the plagiarism. It was just inadvertent. Mark Williams meant to be copying press releases, or something.

He does, however, deny the Houston Press's insinuations of sockpuppetry shenanigans. Ladyman insists that Williams is a real person.

Indeed, Williams is real enough to have his feelings hurt, and this is where the plagiarist's script so familiar from fandom gets whipped out:

( Some highlights )

So, this Jody Rosen -- a mean girl (despite being male) in the world of journalism, Y/Y?

(But it can't make him use the shift key consistently.)

Giles Coren would like you to know that "a" is very srs bsn:

3) And worst of all. Dumbest, deafest, shittest of all, you have removed the unstressed 'a' so that the stress that should have fallen on "nosh" is lost, and my piece ends on an unstressed syllable. When you're winding up a piece of prose, metre is crucial. Can't you hear? Can't you hear that it is wrong? It's not fucking rocket science. It's fucking pre-GCSE scansion. I have written 350 restaurant reviews for The Times and i have never ended on an unstressed syllable. Fuck. fuck, fuck, fuck.

I am sorry if this looks petty (last time i mailed a Times sub about the change of a single word i got in all sorts of trouble) but i care deeply about my work and i hate to have it fucked up by shit subbing. I have been away, you've been subbing joe and hugo and maybe they just file and fuck off and think "hey ho, it's tomorrow's fish and chips" - well, not me. I woke up at three in the morning on sunday and fucking lay there, furious, for two hours. weird, maybe. but that's how it is.

It's just his letter, but oh, it's so tasty and I love "academic" wank on a Sunday, don't you?

It's already on clairvoyantwank, but with 1000+ BoingBoing comments and half the blogosphere a-titter, this wank has matured.

San Francisco sex blogger Violet Blue used to be chummy with the folks at Boing Boing, and naturally, they linked her a lot. However, she recently discovered that they "unpublished" all posts that mentioned her, effectively excising her from the internet's most popular purveyor of wonderful things. Last week, VB wondered what happened (and note that all links to her blog are NSFW). Valleywag, "Silicon Valley's tech gossip rag" (must be thrilling) picked up the story, and promptly started sensationalizing the shit out of it: Did the Internet's free speech guardian try to hush up a girl-on-girl love affair?, they wondered, and speculated on How [Boing Boing editor] Xeni and Violet's Boing Boing affair went sour." It gets Dugg, of course, and pretty soon we're hearing about censorship, Trotsky and "strangely unethical" goings on. Violet posts a tiny-violin follow-up and people start pestering the Boing Boing editors in comments to unrelated posts.

So finally, Boing Boing responds. They say they did the "unpublishing" a year ago. They say they notified Blue. And then, in (*checks bottom of page*) 1100 comments and counting, the shit hits the fan. People accuse Boing Boing of hypocrisy, 1984 allusions fly all over the place, and the Boing Boing comment moderater completely fails to hold the moral high ground as she dances around explaining what Blue did that was so "evil." It's a huge game of they-said, she-said at this point, and figuring out what the hell is going on is frankly less interesting than tracking the endless comparisons to Stalinism. Nothing is like the gulags, people. Nothing.

Now with highlights!

Metafilter commenter sends BB a note from Winston Smith
Scalzi gets his teal deer on, defending Cory Doctorow from the mean metafilterians
Boing Boing's haters are worse than Donald Rumsfeld!
Whether it is redaction, bowdlerization, expurgation, or censorship I see no place for it here."
Boing Boing hates your freedom, just like the Republicans. :(
The OED doesn't deserve this kind of abuse.
BB Moderator Teresa COULD say something mean about that evil, lying attention-whore ... but she won't.

Taken from a mousie on wank_report, with some editing by me:

In August, Teresa & Patrick Nielsen Hayden's blog Making Light featured a story about an Australian book retailer whose management (one Charlie Rimmer -- insert Red Dwarf joke here) sent a ridiculously rude and potentially extortionate letter to a small Aussie publisher.

The small Aussie publisher responded with a whup-ass response and displayed both docs in a public forum. As the Nielsen Haydens are editors and a lot of their blog participants are writers, this created a lot of good and informative discussion about the book trade in general and the Rimmer's asshattery.

More than a month later, a "Chris Oliver" shows up in the comments to tl;dr defend and justify Rimmer's Ghengis Khan-style correspondence and management methods. When "Chris Oliver" is called on various asshatteries (sneering at the NH's "double-barrelled" name, for example) as well as his insistence that books are really no different than canned vegetables, he flounces and spawns sockpuppet #1. S1 doesn't fare well either, flounces, and sockpuppet #2 is spawned. By the end of the thread, "Chris Oliver" and sockpuppets are presumed to be Rimmer himself or someone very close to him. (And if he isn't, "Chris Oliver" is a prime example of making a side look more stupid than it did before.)

When Teresa posts an update here, "Chris Oliver" returns for a last pot-shot/flounce. Says Chris: "My cadding days with you are over but I shall possibly keep looking for chinks in some other mean-spirited site and post as TN-H to my heart's content." Oooh, he's going to pretend to be Teresa too! We'll have to keep our eyes open for that.

(I vaguely remember seeing something on the publishing extortion story somewhere on JF, but can't find it in the wank comms or in the lounges. Anyone know where it might be? ETA: found it, sort of. )


ETA: And speaking of Making Light, they've got a new story on a self-publishing plagiarist... only it seems like it's not the author's fault, but that of her scamming agent/ghost writer. More discussion in random_lounge...

ETA2: Good god, the mice on w_r are ridiculously bitchy.