The Twilight Cornfield

What? No. NO!

We've waited years for this, for Twilight fans to finally be confronted with the true horror of this series... and now they're going to film it like a commercial for feminine products? The arrival of the new Sue-Queen of the Damned should be accompanied by blood and screams, not soft focus and blue Windex!

I want to see Skerrit and Cartwright Lautner and Pattinson spattered, spattered in gore! I want to see Twimoms vomiting in the aisles and teens walking out of the theaters with their legs welded shut, scared childfree!

From the comments:

Twilight was able to overcome her script's shortcomings through sheer force of its charm and the two leads' earnest performances

HAHAHAHHAHAHHA!!!!

Thank-you Ms. Rosenberg 4 standing up 4 female audiences.

*weeps*

Why or why does she continue to fail at showing the TRUTH in Edward and Bella's lovestory? Just because she is Team Jacob? Because she would chose Jacob? How selfish and rude to true fans. Melissa all but spit on the love Edward and Bella had in the book in exhange for the lie that was Bella loved Jacob as much as Edward.

LOL so melodramatic! She spit on their Pure And True Love, oh the horror.

...WHAT?!

That was the only part of these books I wanted to see brought to the screen in all its ridiculous gory glory.

Melissa doesn't seem to understand that "giving a girl a backbone" is different than re-writing a character to turn her into an insensitive witch with no regards toward her boyfriend's feelings. Judging by the clips we've gotten from Eclipse, Melissa doesn't seem to have capture the characters at all. She's changed everything around to make Edward look like a jerk and Jacob like the poor victim.

There's a certain beauty in this comment.

For me it's actually more interesting to not see it. You know, you can do childbirth without seeing childbirth ... it doesn't mean it's any less evocative of an experience.

You know what, honey?

I agree with you. It is always more horrifying when you DON'T see what it is that is so terrifying. Rosemary's Baby never let you see the baby, did it? Or even the birth. And it was still scary as balls.

You're just missing a huge point of that, my dear. Meyer didn't write it that way. We were shoved right there, in the middle of the whole scene. She may have cut away on the wedding night, but she sure as hell didn't for the Death Baby.

In other words, I am attempting to use the whole, "ZOMG STICK TO CANON, BIATCH!" scream so I can get my goddamn Death Baby birthing scene. The one time I ever WILL beg them to stick to canon, mind....

For me it's actually more interesting to not see it.

BOO, YOU WHORE.

In any other circumstance, ANY, I'd agree. But I think she just doesn't want to have to film this.

Oh, curses. That is the one horrible, horrible thing I wanted to see being filmed with all the gory details and giving a bunch of misguided tweens the horror of a lifetime.

*is sad* I wanted to hear about traumatized Twitlight fans, dangit! 38

This isn't normal childbirth, this is cesarean via vampire. How do you "do" that without showing it?

In what world is a dude tearing open his wife's womb with his venom-laced teeth just implied? I mean, human birth, I'm with you. It ain't my kid, I don't wanna see it. I get what happens. Even if it is my kid, I can wait until they clean it up. But how is it the same amount of evocative to not see the birth of the demon spawn?

Okay, forget my previous comment. This is the best comment ever:

MR gives him the Edward the worst lines and builds up Jacob to being the hero. She's rewritten the saga and it's so upsetting. I really wish more people would look into this, we have one last book and unfortunately SHE'S writing the script. I just know, I can feel it.. it's going to be horrible like the other movies.

If you are reading this MR, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASEEEE don't disappoint all the Edward and Bella fans that have made this series one the biggest in the world. Please I'm begging of you. I get it you don't care for Edward, but so many of us do. It's a fact that the Edward and Bella fan base is bigger that Jacob's. Can you try and please us just for once? Do you not see what so many of us do? That you've butchered their relationship and pimp out Jacob's existence like the second coming of Christ? It' exaggerated I know, but it's how we feel. Don't make Breaking Dawn all about the wolf pack and Jacob. You don't have to inject Jacob in EVERY Edward and Bella scene either. I almost feel like you do it out of pity for Taylor cause you like him so much. He needs to grow up and realize he isn't really Jacob and his feelings don't need to get hurt, he's acting. Anyway, please take all of our complaints into consideration. A HUGE amount of the fan base feels this way about you. You have to have noticed by now by you aren't changing are you? Are they paying you on the side? What is the problem?

I wish that I could have just two minutes with you. Just so I could get you take on this. Is it intentional or are you completely oblivious?

BIG FAVOR: Could you guys contact her and inform her of our complaints and get a response?

THANK YOU!

That is some glorious fanbrat whining, right there.

GO BIG OR GO HOME, MELISSA.

Well, there goes my reason for seeing this movie.

WHAT

NO

I HAVE BEEN WAITING SINCE BD CAME OUT FOR THE OMNOMNOMUTERUS SCENE AND SHE JUST YANKS IT AWAY FROM US?!

THIS IS ONE TIME THAT SMEYER HAS TO PUT HER FOOT DOWN AND SAY THAT IT SHOULD BE DONE EXACTLY AS IT IS IN THE BOOK

God, Melissa Rosenberg. Don't think of the children. Think of teh lulz. Think of teh dramaz. Think of the wankas. (Like the children, we also think of you naked. And covered in Bella's blood. Just like RPattz.)

GODDAMMIT. I wonder if they're going to keep Jacob imprinting on the Spawn.

Wait, they're making us sit through TWO of these movies, and we don't get a vamp-section birth to make up for it? What the hell are they going to fill the films with? It's not like there's a plot they can draw on.

For me it's actually more interesting to not see it. You know, you can do childbirth without seeing childbirth ... it doesn't mean it's any less evocative of an experience.

Has she actually read the book? Because Breaking Dawn is really not how childbirth usually goes down.

I'd love to see the Gory Discretion Shot of c-section by tooth. The silhouette or reactions would be awesome.

If this (http://twilightsource.com/2010/06/melissa-rosenberg-clears-up-rumors-birth-scene-will-be-in-breaking-dawn/) is true, she's actually going to include the birthing scene, just that there's not going to be "BUCKETS of blood" during the whole thing. Damn it, I want to see Bella puking up a fountain of blood!