![[icon]](http://www.journalfen.net/userpic/67365/9138) |
The HMS STFU -
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| I just saw this on ![[info]](http://www.journalfen.net/img/community.gif) wank_report.
Behold the Slytherfen whining on http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/WarpThatAesop/Literature:
Harry Potter
Ambition equals lust for power equals The Dark Side, which probably also equals race hatred and usually comes accompanied by physical unattractiveness and/or massive stupidity. People tainted with this can be identified by not liking you. The way to deal with people who begin to show signs of this taint is ostracism at an early age.
◦While it is wrong to show hatred and prejudice for a certain group, no-one will object if you use that group's derogatory nickname at every available opportunity - you know, as, say, a replacement for 'normal people' or 'humans'.
◦It's wrong to discriminate against people. Unless they have no way to fight back, in which case you should ignore them completely or crush them under your boot like the Always Chaotic Evil vermin they must be.
◦It's a good idea for an abused child to follow a seemingly kind stranger who then brainwashes the child into being part of a cult where people believe they can make "magic" with sticks.
◦When all your efforts towards a goal fail (not that you should try really hard in the first place), apply a mind-altering substance - it will give you all the correct answers, direct your actions along the only right path (don't bother to question either of those) and will even alter reality for your good.
◦Do not be afraid to underestimate your enemy - he's most likely a bumbling idiot without a trace of imagination and possesing a plentiful bunch of delusions and complexes that makes all his actions (both past and future) totaly predictable and completely strips him of the ability to learn from his mistakes.
◦Prejudice is wrong and bad - unless it's against Slytherins, because they're evil and deserve to be hated, even the little eleven-year-olds who haven't done anything to anybody.
◦Give children weapons that can kill/torture/maim people instantaneously. Just tell them not to. It'll probably be fine.
■If a schoolyard brawl does happen to result in the maiming of a fellow student at your hand, then you can expect several hours of detention, causing you to, at worst, miss an intramural sports match. Your team wins the cup in your absence anyway, however, and you can still share in the celebrations, including a public make-out with your best friend's younger sister. The whole episode of the maiming is soon forgotten.
◦(Books only, they left Marietta out of the movies, probably out of shame) Loving your family is wonderful, unless you report an illegal secret society to the proper authorities in order to protect them. If you do that, you deserve to walk around with a disfigured face for the rest of your life.
■There's actually a perfectly good Aesop for that situation, and it's "good people break bad laws". Marietta could have quit the society and kept her mouth shut. Who cares if the society is illegal when its goals are noble (save innocent lives), while the law is meant to protect the corrupt ambitions of politicians without regard for innocent lives?
◦Torturing a bad guy is 'gallant'.
◦If your parents are an inconvenience, it's totally okay to destroy their lives to get them out of your way.
◦Hey Girls! The guy who sexually humilates your best friend in front of the entire school to blackmail you into dating him will be an excellent husband to you.
◦You are a girl from a random, poor family, and you want to marry the boy who save the world every five minutes? Not that hard: just find the right dosage of stupid choices that make you always require to be save, and date random boys before him.
◦Journalists are jerks. Except those who believe in all conspiracy theories.
■While we're at it: a bastard journalist you blackmailed is more reliable to transcript a story you dictate word by word than writing it by yourself. | comments: Poke a delusional shipper     |
| (Anonymous) | | Link: | (Link) | | Time: | 2011-01-05 10:02 pm (UTC) |
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| Hey Girls! The guy who sexually humilates your best friend in front of the entire school to blackmail you into dating him will be an excellent husband to you.
Ehm, this is referred to what, exactly?
Captain_PeperHook | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| Isn't Warp That Aesop supposed to be a joke?
I mean, the moral listed for the film version of Watchmen is "You can't make a movie without someone falling to his knees to deliver a gratuitous Big No." | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| I'm very tempted to add this:
Meta-Aesop: Never write anything that might become popular, unless you want multiple Hate Dumbs to accuse you of perverting the young on the flimsiest of premises. | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
bellomee13 | | Link: | (Link) | | Time: | 2011-01-05 10:16 pm (UTC) |
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| | More proof that TV Tropes is increasingly run by the Fun Police | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| (Anonymous) | | Link: | (Link) | | Time: | 2011-01-05 10:42 pm (UTC) |
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| so Snape is a paragon of Verchoo while Harry is EVIL INCARNATE!
(and Delores Umbridge was looking out for the good of mankind too!)
Snape was okay with MURDERING AND INFANT, but he's a innocent ickle victim of hatered?! He basically only did what he did because he loved Lily. That's it. He didn't care about anyone or anything but her. Not even the good of his fucking WORLD. He was just like "You, you're going to kill a baby? Sure. As long as Lily doesn't die."
I mean, we learn all of his actions are only tied to Lily in Deathly Hallows. He didn't do any of it for any other reason.
Yep, Snape has Verchoo pouring out of that gaping neckwound.
-EruditeWitch | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| | Ah TV Tropes. You won't find a more wretched hive of Snapedumb and Harmony. | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| If your parents are an inconvenience, it's totally okay to destroy their lives to get them out of your way.
What are they talking about? Voldemort and Fake Moody both kill their fathers. I can't think of anyone else who destroyed their parents.
You are a girl from a random, poor family, and you want to marry the boy who save the world every five minutes? Not that hard: just find the right dosage of stupid choices that make you always require to be save, and date random boys before him.
So horrible of Ginny not to be some big damn superhero who could see right through Voldemort's magic at age 11. Harry fell for the diary too, and unlike Ginny, he didn't suspect anything was wrong with it until it was spelled out for him in literal magic floating letters. Also, anyone a girl dates before the guy she marries (if she marries) is "random"? Her family is "random" -- because they're poor, apparently?
What do these people do if they crush on someone who doesn't like them back, take a vow of celibacy? | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| (Anonymous) | | Link: | (Link) | | Time: | 2011-01-05 11:46 pm (UTC) |
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| ◦When all your efforts towards a goal fail (not that you should try really hard in the first place), apply a mind-altering substance - it will give you all the correct answers, direct your actions along the only right path (don't bother to question either of those) and will even alter reality for your good.
... it's magic. Magic. For fuck's sake, it's not like Harry was snorting coke to get Slughorn's help! Do they think about what they write? | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| And this is some days after I delete more of tenderlumping's bullshit, this time in JerkAssWoobie where she bashed the living shit out of Ron and Harry while sucking on Snape's e-peen.
You can see it on the Discussion part, if you're intrested. Though I wouldn't be surprised if she put it back in the main page while wailing about how horrible people who don't agree with her are. | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| (Anonymous) | | Link: | (Link) | | Time: | 2011-01-06 12:05 am (UTC) |
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| This is a joke, right? Or is the wank that Snapefen wrote these and are completely serious?
-mollywobbles867 | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| It's a good idea for an abused child to follow a seemingly kind stranger who then brainwashes the child into being part of a cult where people believe they can make "magic" with sticks.
These folks really don't get the concept of "escapist fantasy", do they? | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
![[info]](http://www.journalfen.net/img/userinfo.gif) mcity | | Subject: | *repost | | Link: | (Link) | | Time: | 2011-01-06 01:50 am (UTC) |
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| The thing about Unfortunate Implications is that anyone can find them. All you have to do is take things out of context and/or turn them into generalizations. While doing it for fun, I once managed to find two entirely contradictory Implications on the same page of a book.
I recommend Sweeten That Aesop as a palette cleanser after you read this.
>If a schoolyard brawl does happen to result in the maiming of a fellow student at your hand, then you can expect several hours of detention, causing you to, at worst, miss an intramural sports match. Your team wins the cup in your absence anyway, however, and you can still share in the celebrations, including a public make-out with your best friend's younger sister. The whole episode of the maiming is soon forgotten.
Except for the part where it turns out to be a major bit of foreshadowing, sure. And the part where Harry is sincerely worried he accidentally killed Draco until Snape showed up. And where Draco tried to harm Harry first, IIRC. And it's not exactly a "schoolyard brawl".
>◦Prejudice is wrong and bad - unless it's against Slytherins, because they're evil and deserve to be hated, even the little eleven-year-olds who haven't done anything to anybody.
The eleven-year old who disliked other people just because of their blood purity, and was proud to admit it to a complete stranger.
>◦Torturing a bad guy is 'gallant'.
>◦(Books only, they left Marietta out of the movies, probably out of shame) Loving your family is wonderful, unless you report an illegal secret society to the proper authorities in order to protect them. If you do that, you deserve to walk around with a disfigured face for the rest of your life.
Just because protagonists do things doesn't mean that they're ethically correct. Though I do find JKR's comments on Marietta a bit disturbing.
>◦If your parents are an inconvenience, it's totally okay to destroy their lives to get them out of your way.
I honestly can't tell the difference between warped Aesops and delusional fans. "THIS IS WHAT SNAPEFEN ACTUALLY BELIEVE".
>◦You are a girl from a random, poor family, and you want to marry the boy who save the world every five minutes? Not that hard: just find the right dosage of stupid choices that make you always require to be save, and date random boys before him.
This on'e easy. It would be one of the Harmonian ones, since Ginny spent most of Book 7 being capable, offscreen. She certainly didn't require "saving". | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| (Anonymous) | | Link: | (Link) | | Time: | 2011-01-06 02:29 am (UTC) |
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| What's really warped here is their understanding of the situations they claim to be so mad about, or are clearly mad about. I mean, why even read the books if you want the bad guys to be the good guys and where did people get this stupid idea that somehow being evil is code for being sexy/cool. I like a well written villain as much as the next person and there are indeed some sexy female villains out there, but the fact of the matter that those things are sometimes cannon and here they're not is the problem. I don't remember Draco being classified as ugly, nor do I see how Snape being ugly is because he's evil. I don't see how they get so far into things and don't like them and keep on reading and keep going with all of this and feeling like they're stupid desires will play out.
I'm shocked the TV Tropes people haven't come in and picked this away. I mean they're typically pretty fair from what I've seen so long as you're not Dan Brown or something.
~Cardboard Tube Knight | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
imp | | Link: | (Link) | | Time: | 2011-01-06 07:13 am (UTC) |
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| I can never really fathon Slytherfen tinhatting, since Narcissa, Lucius, and Draco are some of my favorite characters, but their tendency to be snobbish and prejudiced is why I like them. There's something kind of amusing about their selfishness.
The Ginny one particularly irritates me.
1. Of course "poor" has to be brought up, because obviously we have to imply she's a gold digger. Never mind the fact that the Weasleys are embarrassed by the idea of people having to give them things.
2. Yes, Ginny got saved once. I can think of times most of the other main characters in their age group had to be rescued too. She was possessed by Voldemort when she was eleven.
3. GOD FORBID GINNY DATED BOYS. She's really damned if she moves on, damned if she doesn't, isn't she?
4. When was it ever implied that the reason Harry liked Ginny was because she had to be rescued or dated other guys? Sure, she had to stop pining over him for him to notice how she actually was, and the jealousy might've spurred him on, but with the first one, it's flatout stated that part of why Harry liked her was because "she rarely cried", and I generally got the impression that the reason they clicked was because they both preferred more independent people over their clingier (or, alternatively, less emotionally dense) previous love interests. | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| | Speaking of TvTropes, the Strangled By the Red String page is getting infuriating. One person keeps adding H/G as an example, even though the trope has shifted to non-subjective examples of pairings that literally have no build-up. The person re-added it right after another example was removed because the couple had a season's worth of build-up; yet somehow H/G and its book's worth of build-up qualifies? | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| (Anonymous) | | Link: | (Link) | | Time: | 2011-01-06 11:22 pm (UTC) |
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| It's wrong to discriminate against people. Unless they have no way to fight back, in which case you should ignore them completely or crush them under your boot like the Always Chaotic Evil vermin they must be.
Crush the defenceless underfoot? You mean like the DEs wanted to do to Muggles and unarmed Muggleborns?
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| (Anonymous) | | Link: | (Link) | | Time: | 2011-01-06 11:59 pm (UTC) |
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| | There is a reason why there is an entire page for Harry Potter in Ron The Death Eater. | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
major_dallas | | Subject: | Nothing To Do With Harmoanian Nonsense! | | Link: | (Link) | | Time: | 2011-01-07 12:57 am (UTC) |
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| | WHAT ARE YOU DOING LINKING TO TVTROPES? WE COULD GET LOST FOR DAYS IN THERE!GAH![/goofing] | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| You are a girl from a random, poor family, and you want to marry the boy who save the world every five minutes? Not that hard: just find the right dosage of stupid choices that make you always require to be save, and date random boys before him.
Always so classy.
How many times did Harry save Ginny again? | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| (Anonymous) | | Link: | (Link) | | Time: | 2011-01-09 10:45 pm (UTC) |
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| | There's a militant Gaston-fan in the Just Bugs Me: Beauty & Beast section who sounds a little Snapefen-ish with their arguments. I wonder if there's some overlap or if there's just one (or ten) in every fandom. | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| Hey Girls! The guy who sexually humilates your best friend in front of the entire school to blackmail you into dating him will be an excellent husband to you.
I always find this hilarious. "Oh, James would make such a horrible husband IRL!" Yet somehow, the guy that treats a girl like the exception to his bigotry? Totally cool! IDEK | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
| Ok, there was nothing sexual about what happened to Snape. Pantsing someone is a very old thing that has nothing to do with sex, and Lilly didn't date him untill after he had changed into the kind of person who wouldn't do that anymore.
Why do they never seem to realize any of that? | | (Reply to this) (Thread) |
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The HMS STFU -
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