I'm going to have to assume Butcher (who I don't know squat about) has a history of being clueless, because coming to this cold, it isn't precisely a steaming pile of Fail.

I'm also kind of bothered by the current meme that "the tone argument", when flipped on its head, means any angry or insulting behaviour from an oppressed person is acceptable, and that oppressed people can never in the course of fighting that oppression legitimately hurt privileged people. No, in fact, privilege doesn't make a person emotionally invulnerable, and oppresion doesn't make you always morally right.