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ruslan ([info]ruslan) wrote in [info]unfunny_fandom,
@ 2010-09-26 05:05:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
A Turkish woman takes umbrage at the misrepresentation of Turkey in Christopher Pike's novel The Secret of Ka. She posts a review on Amazon (and another one on LJ at bookfails) talking about her complaints with the book.

Then, a man claiming to be one of Christopher Pike's editors shows up to westsplain her own culture to her. Also he decides that she's been threatening to cut off the author's hands.

Arguments include:

1) It's okay for a major character to have an Indian name! He started off being Ahmed but readers liked this other name better. Also, Amesh sounds a lot like Ahmed. Same difference! Although it turns out Ahmed isn't even a Turkish name and Turkish people will spell it Ahmet.
2) Turkish, Kurdish, Arab ... it's all a matter of perspective! Who's to say whether a Turkish person is Arab or not? (Not you because I know more about your own ethnic background than you do.)
3) But all those people he wrote about who dress strangely and have foreign names and address their grandfathers by unusual titles are supposed to be weird! We didn't misrepresent Turkish culture at all! It's just that all of those characters are supposed to be iconoclasts or hipsters or something. Yeah.
4) I totally saw a guy wearing a turban in Turkey once! Also, taxi drivers in London and New York wear turbans. (???)
5) All cultures even tangentially related to Islam and the Middle East are segregated, war-torn, and insanely conservative. It's illegal to swear and nobody sits near women and bloody wars are waged outside of the Hilton every night. :(
6) I'm just never going to address the fact that you're offended and feel that your culture was used like a dirty rag at all!
7) u mad :(

Ah, I remember well the Turkish capital, Istanbul, that desert city.

I nicked this from a mouse at wank_report (thank you mousey!)

ETA: A clever person on Amazon dug up proof that the "editor" Michael Brite is actually a sockpuppet of Christopher Pike himself. He seems to mostly use the account to leave worshipful reviews of his own books. Seriously:

Perhaps The Best Book I Have Ever Read
Christopher Pike's "Thirst" is a masterpiece. The book is not only a fantastic thriller, a mind boggling mystery, but a spiritual revelation. Alisa is a five thousand year old vampire who kills as casually as she makes love. Yet there remains deep within her a painful and yet abiding memory and love for a man she met when she was young, a man who may have been more than a man -- the mysterious Lord Krishna from the Bhagavad Gita, the equivalent of the Indian Bible. However, please do not get the idea this book is about religion. Pike's novel is totally free of dogma. He never says Krishna is God, and his heroine is never sure who Krishna truly is. Also, he is careful not to offend anyone's faith. But there is a heart breaking passage where two of the main characters debate the existence of God. They soon come to the conclusion that "God" is impossible to define or know, but whatever Krishna was, he was too powerful, and too beautiful, to disobey. And that leads to the crux of the story. The master vampire who has created Alisa must destroy all the vampires to gain salvation. Yet, ironically, Krishna has promised Alisa she will have his protection if she obeys him and never creates another vampire. It is the clash of these two contradictory vows that stands at the heart of this brilliant novel. Reading it, I felt I was given an insight into the mystery of life itself. Why, for every good impulse in the world, is there an opposing evil? Yet Pike tells this incredible morality play without preaching. In fact, I suspect most people who read the book will simply enjoy it because it is a kick-ass novel about the most intense character in all of modern fiction. I am trying to say "Thirst" is so much more than a vampire book. It is ultimately a timeless fable of how fear can change to hatred, and then to love, and finally mature into devotion. Pike has managed a small miracle by showing us that these emotion are not truly at odds with each other. For they all reside in every human heart, in the same way, perhaps, the divine does as well. I cannot recommend this book highly enough. It changed my life forever.

ETA again: Christopher Pike has now made an impressively paranoid post on a website of his accusing the original Amazon reviewer (caligirl_08) of posting negative reviews under multiple aliases, as well as claiming that [info]bookfails is a "livejournal community sponsored by someone of Turkish background who has taken things much too far and is trying to rob fiction authors of their artistic license".

Dear Author has also caught wind of this (last item on the page).

But wait, there's more!

caligirl_08 ([info]bs_08 on [info]bookfails) tackles Pike's aforementioned sexy vampire novel, Thirst. It ... well, I'm just going to leave this here:


Initial post: Nov. 7, 2009 3:08 AM PST
Michael Brite says:
It says clearly in the book that Sita was an Aryan, a well known group who invaded India five thousand years ago. They were all blond and blue-eyed.


(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)


[info]lyrangalia
2010-09-30 06:08 pm UTC (link)
Wow. Okay, Christopher Pike, you now have an invitation to the Crazy Vampire Author Fight. It's you, Anne Rice, Laurell K Hamilton, and Stephenie Meyer locked in an empty room. Door doesn't open until there's only one of you left.

Bring your own rusty spork.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]cyndra_falin
2010-09-30 07:05 pm UTC (link)
How about the door doesn't open until NONE of them are left?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]ladyvyola
2010-09-30 07:18 pm UTC (link)
You took the words right out of my mouth!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]cmdr_zoom
2010-09-30 08:01 pm UTC (link)
When there's one left, an actual vampire is let into the room.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lyrangalia
2010-10-01 07:14 pm UTC (link)
As long as the vampire isn't Lestat, Edward Cullen, Sita, or Jean-Claude, I am 100% okay with this plan.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]cleolinda
2010-10-01 07:48 pm UTC (link)
I'd like to see a vengeful Edward Cullen sent in there, actually. "YEAH, THIS IS FOR MAKING A MOCKERY OUT OF VAMPIRES TO THE ENTIRE WORLD. WHO'S SPARKLY NOW??"

"But mine are just illogically pale Mary Sues--"

"I'LL GET TO YOU IN A MOMENT, PIKE."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lyrangalia
2010-10-01 07:57 pm UTC (link)
I just tried to make a "WHO'S SPARKLY NOW??" vengeful Edward icon, but the number of angry Edward faces on Google Image Search is... less than satisfying.

Oh god ew no no more shirtless baby Rob pics either.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]cleolinda
2010-10-01 08:39 pm UTC (link)
oh god nooooo

I grabbed this one for the Eclipse thing I did.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]sequinedlizard
2010-10-01 09:24 pm UTC (link)
For popular fiction vampires, my vote would be to send in Eric Northman. This could simply be because of Alexander Skarsgard :)

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]everstar
2010-09-30 10:55 pm UTC (link)
Please tell me this will be on pay-per-view.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lyrangalia
2010-10-01 07:16 pm UTC (link)
Oh no, this will be made available for free. It will be too glorious to not share.

But if you get pay-per-view you get Splatter-Cam.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]everstar
2010-10-01 11:17 pm UTC (link)
I'm all over that. Much like the authors at the end of the fight.

I will also buy the special edition DVD.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lyrangalia
2010-10-01 11:24 pm UTC (link)
The special edition DVD will include a running commentary track by Alton Brown (who will wonder if he took a wrong turn heading to Kitchen Stadium) as well as colour commentary from the RiffTrax guys.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


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