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Warnings Wank In Bandom The matter probably should have ended there, but "The story is meant to be jarring; you are supposed to be upset. That's not irresponsible; that was the point.I'm not here to hold anyone's hand." A lot of the original discussion is in the comments to the fic, although she deleted a lot of dissenting comments, and more occurred here. Anyway, "Fandom has always played by two sets of rules, one for regular peeps and one for the popular peeps. This incident just shines a light on it." Also from "I've had cancer, but I know very little about the actual disease. Also, omg! Nobody should ever write a cancer fic without warning for cancer because what if it TRIGGERS ME???? Or, like, a fic with strokes!!! I MIGHT STROKE AGAIN. IT WOULD BE TRAGIC." Yeah, it may be harsh, but it's the truth." Another commenter, "Readers should take responsibility for their reading decisions. If they don't like it...stop. Move on to something else. It's that simple. I refuse to be responsible for someone else's emotional issues." An epic thread ensues, and she soon loses whatever civility she had; asking for warnings is 'bullshit' and emotional abuse, and everyone who disagrees with her is flaming. She also warns that by asking for warnings on rape, soon people will be warning for angry clowns and foot fetishes. Too much is being placed on writers, and too little responsibility being placed on readers! People with triggers have mental issues they need to see a therapist for, and they shouldn't be in fandom. Surely these people can click out of a post as soon as they hit a trigger, and suffer no ill effects? She knows how triggers work; she wrote a fanfic on someone with PTSD, and from this experience she is totally able to tell actual survivors of abuse what they're doing wrong. Her friend Once I don't quite see how this is different than if one is, say, allergic to citrus. If you buy a pre-packaged cake in the store, you have a reasonable expectation of being able to read the ingredients label and see that it does or does not contain a citrus ingredient. This is because, in the United States at least, commercial food products are required to list their ingredients by law. Of course, there are many food companies which don't wish to reveal their secret recipes, so they may just say natural ingredients instead of getting specific, and you, as a person with a citrus allergy, would know to stay clear because natural ingredients might be anything at all. But if you're at a bake sale, and there's a delicious looking confection called boom cake, which doesn't have a description or a list of ingredients next to it, wouldn't you, as someone with a citrus allergy, ask the person doing the selling, "What's in a boom cake?" You might even go so far as to say, "I'm allergic to citrus, is why I'm asking." And if the person doing the selling didn't know, or if you didn't feel comfortable asking the person doing the selling because you're afraid they might mislead you through ignorance or malice, wouldn't you ask your unallergic friend who had bought boom cake if she thought it had citrus? Or, perhaps, buy the red velvet cake instead, since you know that red velvet cakes are chocolate and not citrus. She also derails what had been a specific fandom conversation about warning for rape into a denounciation of warnings for things like cheating, 'et cetera'. Warning for rape is a slippery slope that leads into warning for ridiculous things! In the comments to this post, FAN 1 says, "Privilege: you're soaking in it." FAN 2 says, "WHY ARE YOU ACCUSING ME OF A CONSPIRACY TO HURT YOU PEOPLE?! THERE IS NO CONSPIRACY!! YOU ALL ARE JUST TOO DAMN SENSITIVE! YOU ARE HARSHING MY SQUEE GODDAMMIT!!" Also, it's appropriatory to talk about 'derailing' or 'privilege' if you're a rape victim rather than a POC. Triggers: serious business. Unless they're the same as red velvet cake, vicious attacks by telephone cords, or the color orange. ETA: "I'm wondering if what we're seeing here is a form of free-floating rage. It's not uncommon for survivors of trauma to manifest this. They've never been able to confront their abuser and direct their anger toward him or her. They may also experience self-hatred; it may not be appropriate, but many victims of rape, especially, have been socially conditioned to accept some level of responsibility for the horrible thing that happened to them, and women carrying that awful baggage around with them might well hate themselves for it on some level. All this externalization of blame seems to me a warping of the otherwise healthy process of letting go of any sense that they brought the abuse on themselves. There's some pretty serious pathology going on here on a community-wide scale. I wish I understood more about it, or that I had access to the therapist I can no longer afford, to get a better handle on it." "I am saying that, having suffered trauma, the victim is elevated to a privileged rank because of that trauma - the privilege would not exist without the trauma... one might make a case for the "privilege of the victim" here." She then makes another comment she later deletes, which Well, I don't quite know how to say this, but you weren't actually called a liar. According to what I read, two of those times you called yourself a liar because you were put in the unworkable position of having to figure out that pleasing your mother was what your survival depended on. You weren't called a liar when it first came up; you made a choice to survive and retracted your original statement. You went to your mom, she asked you in front of your abuser if you were lying, and then you *understandably* said you were. But she didn't call you a liar until (I assume) *after* the fact according to the timeline you supplied. Do you see why I am questioning this? You seem to look for the negative in any situation and to paint yourself as more of a victim (if you could be) than you already are. I found mara_snh's insights very helpful on that front. And as you show in your last paragraph, you know very well where the (false) claim of "privilege" could be said to elide. I'm not saying it *does*. But in the original comment, which was an outstanding use of hyperbole, when the privilege comparison was made, it seemed to me - given the way your bandwagon jumped on one person who disagreed with you in a dehumanising and unsettling fashion - that actually one *could* argue there was a weird kind of reverse privilege obtaining. If one wanted to. Which I do not. Just like cyatnite, I'm not a troll. I've been around fandom for 10 years. (And I do use warnings and have advocated for them in the past.) But I am one of those very few people in fandom who can follow a logic chain for more than three steps. The people who are shouting your rights from the treetops and using your pain and abuse to excuse and justify the oppression and verbal abuse of another WOMAN could turn around tomorrow and do the same to you if they disagree with you. And that is WRONG. If you, as a human, demand to be treated with compassion and respect then you have a moral obligation - no matter how much or how often someone disagrees with you - to treat others with compassion and respect. (It is clear - meaning no disrespect - that this behaviour was NOT modeled for you as a child and that it is something you are having to learn.) Allowing, encouraging, and even participating in the disrespect and oppression will not help you and will probably harm you emotionally. So if you cannot deal with people with compassion and respect - including me! - then you get yourself out of the situation. Just go away. But don't harm yourself any further." This is, of course, the same Not content with that, (This 'RPS is violation' argument is particularly hilarious given that ETA 2: ETA 3: Rape victims don't suffer a lack of privilege as they are not an involuntary group: "The use of the word "privilege" with the categories "reader" and "writer" doesn't make sense. Privilege is talking about systemic advantages accorded to one group of people over another group of people, where membership in either group is either involuntary, a source of a stable sense of identity, e.g. race, religion, gender, health status, age, class." The second post effectively shuts down all further discussion: "You do not have my permission to comment on any of my dreamwidth entries on these issues, you do not have permission to private message me on these issues, you do not have permission to e-mail me on these issues, you do not have permission to speak to me in chat about these issues, you do not have permission to talk me on the phone or in person about these issues, you do not have permission to send me physical mail about these issues." Post a comment in response: |
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