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	anarchicq 2010-01-20 06:49 pm UTC (link)
	...On the bright side, at least the bibles are in Creole, as opposed to Scientology's pamphlets which will undoubtedly accompany their e-Meters? (Reply to this)(Thread)

	darksumomo 2010-01-20 07:49 pm UTC (link)
	Hah, beat me to it! Co$ might have them in French, but not Creole. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	telegramsam 2010-01-20 08:39 pm UTC (link)
	Maybe they can sell the bibles and e-meters for food and water. O.o; Also, Scientology needs to just go DIAF. See, this is why I prefer the Salvation Army as a faith-based charity - at least they show up with food and water before passing out the Bibles. You know, the RIGHT way around instead of ARSE-BACKWARDS? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

amadi
2010-01-20 11:06 pm UTC (link)

From what a friend told me a couple of weeks ago, during his stint with Salvation Army Disaster Services, if someone wanted a Bible from them, they had to specifically ask for it. They weren't even offered. Counseling, which was religiously toned was offered (because the counselors were trained that way and/or were pastors, not shrinks) but they weren't handing out Bibles after (or with) the box lunches.

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	telegramsam 2010-01-21 02:31 am UTC (link)
	I don't have a problem with that, personally. They seem a fair sight better than a lot of the "charity" organizations out there, religious or otherwise. My donation went through them for Haiti. I tried Red Cross first, admittedly, but their website was down at the time. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	kookaburra 2010-01-21 01:37 am UTC (link)
	Is it terrible of me to wonder what the hell Scientology wants with Haiti? Are they going to swindle the Haitian people out what little they have left?! (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	freezer 2010-01-21 03:33 am UTC (link)
	Paving the way for a refuge when their inevitable coup attempt inevitably fails horribly. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	eisoj5 2010-01-20 09:34 pm UTC (link)
	ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME (Reply to this)

	snarkhunter 2010-01-20 10:10 pm UTC (link)
	If ya pray hard enough, God'll make it rain. Of course, if it floods, it's your fault, you pagan devil-worshipper, you. (Reply to this)

tachikoma01
2010-01-20 10:18 pm UTC (link)

This strikes me as a bad idea. "God knocked down all your houses and killed all your neighbors... but he still loves you. Unless you're gay. He's just all mysterious and shit."

(Yes, I do understand that many people find comfort in religion in times of strife. But this seems more a conversion effort than a comfort effort. And as a conversion effort, particularly misguided.)

How about sending them bread with edible bible verses printed on it or something? They might actually appreciate that. (Yes, I HAVE seen such a product!)

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snarkhunter
2010-01-20 10:23 pm UTC (link)

The conversion element is particularly disturbing since Haiti is, generally speaking, a deeply religious country. But I really don't think most of them are going to be like, "Awesome! A talking Bible! That'll make it so much easier to die of thirst and septicemia!"

How about sending them bread with edible bible verses printed on it or something?

Or, you know, just bread. :D

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	tachikoma01 2010-01-21 04:03 pm UTC (link)
	In my brain I was thinking "If you HAVE to send them the Jesus, can't you send them the Jesus on food and medical supplies? Where it will be useful?" (Reply to this)(Parent)

	tetradecimal 2010-01-20 10:24 pm UTC (link)
	Hilariously, the majority of Haitians are already Christian. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	airawyn 2010-01-20 10:40 pm UTC (link)
	Nah, they're Catholics. That's even worse than being ignorant pagans.* *No offense, Pagans. (Reply to this)(Parent)

selene_avis
2010-01-20 10:48 pm UTC (link)

I think it's an excuse not to do anything. I'm not Christian, but I understand and accept that many Christians believe that it's important to spread the word. Which, fine. But the Bible said that Christians are supposed to do a lot of other things, too. Only those other things - clothing the naked, feeding the hungry, caring for the prisoners, helping countries repeatedly screwed over by the United States build up their infrastructure so they can deal with natural disasters - are a lot harder to accomplish than spreading the word. But spreading the word is also important, and, after all, no one can do everything.

These people with their solar powered Bibles have enough empathy to know that Haiti is in need right now. But if they accepted that no, actually, Haiti doesn't need the Word, specifically, as they already have it, then they'd have to work toward all of the other stuff. Much easier to ignore reality and insist that their souls are in need of saving.

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Also...

selene_avis
2010-01-20 10:54 pm UTC (link)

I think there's some Just World Hypothesis involved. If you (general you) are a Christian who somehow skipped over the Book of Job (just to start) and believe that good things happen to Christians and bad things happen to non-Christians (to put it roughly), then ignoring the existent Christianity in Haiti allows one to - unvoiced - put the devastation from the earthquake up to the Haitians still being in need of saving rather than to Haiti not having the needed infrastructure to deal with natural disasters.

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Re: Also...

silrana
2010-01-21 02:10 am UTC (link)

You'd be surprised how many people who call themselves Christians haven't read much of the Bible, and I say that as a Christian. I think a lot of it has to do with the different denominations' internal cultures. Some churches have a 'the minister/pastor/priest will interpret it for us' attitude. In my church, we believe it is not only the right but the duty of our members to read the Bible and come to our own conclusions.

So, yeah, Job. Crap happens to nice people. And people into the assorted versions of the prosperity gospel need to be locked in a small room and have the Book of Job read to them over and over until it finally sinks in.

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Re: Also...

telegramsam
2010-01-21 02:42 am UTC (link)

Or just be bashed over the head with the Book of Job until they are concussed into forgetting what they were doing in the first place.

It really astounds me how many people can just COMPLETELY dismiss the message of Gospels and focus purely on all the smiting and retribution parts.

Do they really think God is going to care how many Gay people they prevented from getting married if they turn away from another human being who is crying out in dire need?

Frankly I think a lot of it just stems from this idea deeply, deeply ingrained in the collective American psyche that if something bad happens to you, it's because you MUST have done something to deserve it. Poor? You're lazy, or stupid. Sick? You didn't eat right or exercise enough or take the right vitamins or whatever. Got mugged? Well you shouldn't have gone out after dark. Got raped? Well it's your own fault for dressing "slutty". And so and so on, because Lord forbid any of us ever admit that something bad could happen to ourself.

< sarcasm>So of course Haiti must be a bunch of backwards heathens, and that is why a natural faultline that's been beneath Hispaniola for millions of years did what faults occasionally do - move, and cause an earthquake. But no, it's all those silly heathens' fault!1! < /sarcasm>

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	Re: Also... silrana 2010-01-21 04:20 am UTC (link)
	Actually, I think that has less to do with religion and more to do with human nature. "It can't happen to me because I don't..." is a wall people put up to make themselves feel safe from life's risks. That's not unique to American society. I haven't heard of a culture yet that doesn't indulge in finding ways to feel superior to others. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: Also... telegramsam 2010-01-21 04:35 am UTC (link)
	That's true to a degree. But I think the issue is just exacerbated in the US by the whole "pull-yourself-up-by-the-bootstraps" mentality, this country highly prizes people who do everything on their own and devalues anyone who requires aid for whatever reason. I think there's just that extra bit of shame and blame dumped on people in need of help in these parts. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: Also... ekaterinv 2010-01-21 04:56 am UTC (link)
	I disagree. More "traditional" cultures blame the victims by saying they stepped out of bounds, they weren't filial or obedient or honorable whatever. I really think victim blaming is a human constant. Actually, I believe the U.S. is better about it than a lot of other societies, though we certainly have a long way to go. (Reply to this)(Parent)

Re: Also...

ekaterinv
2010-01-21 04:20 am UTC (link)

I went to "Bible study" with a friend at a Pentocostal church once. We just read the section of the Bible the pastor had chosen out loud, and told us what it meant. What he thought it meant, that is, which is very much not what I thought it meant. It was such a small passage, too, completely out of context. As someone from a liberal Lutheran tradition, I was very WTF the whole time.

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	Re: Also... seiberwing 2010-01-27 04:11 pm UTC (link)
	I'll up you one. When I went to 'Bible Study' with Campus Crusade all they did was talk about how this verse means Jesus died for us and this verse means we're going to heaven. I was very distraught at the lack of study. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	tachikoma01 2010-01-21 04:07 pm UTC (link)
	It still read to me as a 'conversion effort', I guess. Perhaps I'm tainted by my own experiences with the kind of people who give out bibles in this area. In addition to the Giddeons, we've got some real 'A winner is you' ones that skulk around downtown. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	tetradecimal 2010-01-21 04:13 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, I'm sure it is. Either because they don't know anything about Haiti and just assumed everyone there is a godless heathen, or because Catholics are totally not Christians. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	lyssa 2010-01-21 12:02 am UTC (link)
	What annoys me more about this shit is that it is taking up limited space that could be used for things like food, water, and medical supplies. Unless the airport and water ports are better than they were at the beginning of relief efforts. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	hallidae 2010-01-21 01:49 am UTC (link)
	There's a couple of naval ships working to clear out the ports for incoming supplies, but it's still very slow going. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	redwarrior 2010-01-25 07:36 pm UTC (link)
	I agree with you. It's kind of like a double passive-aggressive bitchslap that way. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	kyabetsu 2010-01-20 11:12 pm UTC (link)
	Oops. Wrong box. We meant to send the 600 solar-bibles that turn into loaves and fishes. (Reply to this)

	brennalarose 2010-01-20 11:45 pm UTC (link)
	What is this I don't even. GAH. This is why my friends think I'm Pagan, and I don't correct them. (Reply to this)

	kookaburra 2010-01-21 01:39 am UTC (link)
	According to their website, the Proclaimer is "self-powered and can play the Bible in the jungle, desert or ... even on the moon!" SOUND DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY! GOODNIGHT! (Reply to this)(Thread)

	sneer 2010-01-21 05:40 am UTC (link)
	Well, duh. Jesus will come and put air on the moon just so you can hear the talky bible machine. ...I have to joke about this or I will bash my head into the wall and not stop until my brain plops out on the floor (Reply to this)(Parent)

agent_hyatt
2010-01-21 03:07 am UTC (link)

My prediction is that the next unnecessary religious conversion tool sent to Haiti will be Chick Tracts. In particular, all of his anti-Catholic ones, with a new tract, written just for Haitians, about how Satan has double-crossed his church ('cause in the Chick-verse, the Catholic Church was founded by Satan) by creating the earthquake, but God has compassionately sent Jack Chick to save the survivors.

...this comment is meant to be humorous, but just thinking about it makes me depressed and angry.

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	kyabetsu 2010-01-21 03:29 am UTC (link)
	Chick tracts, much like real paper bibles, would be helpful. TP & fire-starting materials aren't as necessary as water and food, but they're still pretty damn handy. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	agent_hyatt 2010-01-21 03:39 am UTC (link)
	That salvages it a bit, though I don't think I'd want to use Chick tracts as TP, even if they are shit. Burning, though... would they make a holy fire or an unholy fire? And how many would it take to make the fire un/holy? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	kyabetsu 2010-01-21 03:59 am UTC (link)
	If it keeps somebody warm, boils some safe drinking water, helps heat non-potable water for bathing, cooks food, or gives light? I'd call it plenty holy. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	agent_hyatt 2010-01-21 08:27 am UTC (link)
	Yeah, but... It's amusing to think of them making an evil fire that can only be tamed by feeding/reading the Bible passages that Chick ignores. Or maybe they just won't light on fire at all, since fire has standards. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	snarkhunter 2010-01-21 01:39 pm UTC (link)
	I just want to say that the kitteh in your icon is superlatively adorable. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	kyabetsu 2010-01-21 06:40 pm UTC (link)
	All hail Snozberry Cat. thank you. :D (Reply to this)(Parent)

	tachikoma01 2010-01-21 04:11 pm UTC (link)
	I think it would depend on what kind of ink/paper they're made with to determine if they'd make good TP or not. Some inks are really bad for the skin, and I can't imagine Chick prints with soy ink unless his publisher forces him to. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	kyabetsu 2010-01-21 06:45 pm UTC (link)
	hrm. Hadn't considered the ink. Even rough paper is soft if you crumple it enough, but toxic inks would put a bullet in the idea. Let us have a Chick Tract Customer Service Representative for testing the effects of Chick Tract ink on delicate regions of skin! Can we arrange that? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	tachikoma01 2010-01-21 09:58 pm UTC (link)
	How would you phrase that in a way that isn't "take a tract and stick it up your ass?" (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	kyabetsu 2010-01-21 10:35 pm UTC (link)
	I think I prefer the blunt method to the overly-coy "Spread the pages. Now spread your legs. Caress your buttocks with the book. No. Deeper." Really. We've come to a very bad place on the Venn Diagram of Kink (the VDK) where scat-fetish, biblio-fetish, and extreme religious beliefs meet in a dark nexus of shame. And we came here via SCIENCE. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	khym_chanur 2010-01-21 06:24 am UTC (link)
	Damn, I wish I had a link to the Ghastly's Ghastly Comic which introduces Chick Boy. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	kyabetsu 2010-01-21 07:21 am UTC (link)
	For folk who are not khym_chanur and don't know Ghastly's Ghastly Comic... It's completely NSFW and wonderfully pervy. There. Now my conscience is clean when I link to Chick-Boy's first story arc with Freddy and Chick-boy II which is his first appearance, regardless of the roman numeral. Genki genki happy bum fun! ^-^ (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	khym_chanur 2010-01-21 08:33 am UTC (link)
	Oops, yeah, sorry, should have said it was NSFW. Also, I thought him throwing Chick Tracts like they were ninja-stars was his first appearance. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	kyabetsu 2010-01-21 06:51 pm UTC (link)
	The archive is not set up so well. So I ended up starting at the beginning and rolling towards the most recent. The very first one I found was "Chick Boy II." I may have missed one in my flipping, but if you can find one before 2004-04-18, that would certainly explain the roman numeral. (Reply to this)(Parent)