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John Barrowman (![[info]](http://www.journalfen.net/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} anything_goes) wrote,@ 2005-12-20 15:43:00 |
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John and Ben - Kinks And Discoveries
(players only, takes place the night of December 16, follows this)
"God," John says as they make their way outside. "I don't know if I was as ready for this as I thought I was. But I'm glad I came. I got to meet you," he smiles at Ben, leaning on him just a little. He signals for the car and sinks into it gratefully when it gets there.
"Sorry, give me a few minutes," John murmurs, rolling his head slowly, trying to work the kinks out of his neck. He pours himself some water from the bar and swallows a pill. "Should be better in a few," he murmurs. "Have a drink if you like."
Instead of reaching for a drink, Ben shifts on the seat and raises his hands to gently massage John's neck. "Take as much time as you need." he says softly. "While I'm glad you were there tonight as well, it seems like that was a lot of pressure to put yourself under so soon after being sick." He continues massaging gently, working out each knotted muscle as he finds it. While he is enjoying touching John, his main intent really is to ease his discomfort and Ben can only hope John sees it that way as well.
"Oh, Ben... god, that's amazing," John says, just as softly. "I maybe did overdo things. I thought I was ready, but... still, I will not regret it. Not a bit." He relaxes under Ben's touches. "You're better than the pills," he says. "Natural high, maybe." He's enjoying the touches, but it's that Ben would do this for him that's really wonderful. "You know, no one's ever..." he is surprised as he realises this. "I don't think anyone outside of my family has ever touched me for non-sexual reasons. Maybe some of my friends, but not like this..."
He thinks about it for a minute as he continues to massage John's neck, sliding his hands down enough to include his shoulders as well. "I'm glad it's helping you to feel better." he says thoughtfully. "I'm also glad you're enjoying it and not offended. I probably should have asked you before I touched. I do apologize after the fact. I hope you know all you would have to do is tell me to stop and I would."
Ben is silent for a minute longer as he continues to contemplate John's words. "I think most of us are so busy with our jobs and obligations that we forget just how important a simple touch can be. I also think most of us are afraid of offending others if we do touch them, even if it's not sexual in any way."
"I don't think you could do anything to offend me," John says. "And it is wonderful... don't you dare stop," he grins. "I don't want you to. I'm glad you felt able to just... do it." He thinks on the other things Ben said.
"I know what you mean, about possibly offending people," John says after a pause. "Sometimes all I want is to be held and I don't think I've ever had that, except after sex. Like I had to have sex to get to that point. And I'm sure you've met the gay guys who think fucking is just fine but anything else is too un-manly?" He tries not to sound bitter at that.
"Yeah, I've definitely met those guys. I think I went through a period where those were the only guys I met in fact. It almost made me want to try women again. Almost." he grinned before getting serious. "I've always wondered if those were the so-called normal gay men and I was the weird one who actually enjoyed being held or holding someone or even kissing for the sake of kissing instead as a sort of 'hello, want to fuck.' kind of thing."
Ben shifts a little more on the seat even as he continues to massage the muscles under his hands. "Let me know if I push too hard." he leans his head down just a bit to whisper softly.
"I think those guys are responsible for half the stereotypes out there," John says. "And yeah, I had that period too. Like they were all that was out there for a while. Though I have to admit, I didn't get quite desperate enough to consider women. But I've been lucky. I never had to." He arches a little into Ben's touch. "Mmmm. Those guys don't know what they're missing if you ask me."
"And if you whisper like that again," he says, unable to stop the words. "The only thing too hard will be me."
Unable to resist temptation, a problem he's always had, Ben leans just the slightest bit closer and whispers again. "Promise?" He knows he should pull back again but instead takes a moment to just enjoy being so close he can feel the warmth of John's skin radiating up. His hands have slowed to a very slow massaging motion but they haven't quite fallen to the point of caress instead of massage. Yet.
On cue, John's cock starts to fill and harden. "You can feel if you want," he says, daringly. "But remember, I did warn you..." He leans back, pressing a soft kiss to Ben's neck. "And another warning, we only have a few blocks to go." He presses closer to Ben, making it clear that any further exploration is very welcome.
With a low moan, he gives in and slides his hands slowly from John's shoulders and trails them down his chest. "I was going to be good and not make this sexual yet. I was going to be good, but you're just too much to resist." he whispers now because he's not sure he can get his throat to work any better. Watching his hands as they move further down, he takes his time and his fingers just barely brush along the fabric of John's shirt.
"So was I," John replies, "but you're too tempting...." he can't help it, a low chuckle comes out, imagining Ben as temptation itself, which wouldn't be so far from reality. "And being good is *highly* overrated, don't you think?" Finally, he turns, claiming Ben's lips with his for the first time, unable to resist any longer.
He doesn't know why he's surprised that things ratchet up another notch when he feels Ben's lips open under his.
Ben can't help it, as soon as he feels John's lips on his he opens to him. Suddenly his entire attention is on the wet heat of lips and tongue. A small whimper escapes even as he tries to hold it back, but it's been so long since a kiss has felt this good. His hands are now firmly planted in the optimal position on John's head to make sure the kiss will last at least a little bit longer.
Kissing back, his tongue moving into Ben's mouth without a moment's thought, John wishes this could last forever, this moment of pure and complete happiness as he kisses Ben. Ben's whimper stirs one of his own as he tries to press himself into Ben even more.
That's when he realises that the car has stopped. And almost regrets having to stop the kiss so they can get out. But he moves back. "Car's stopped," he says, low and husky and full of promise.
He nods, hoping he doesn't look as shocked as he feels. What started out as a typical charity event had certainly taken a turn Ben never expected. Even though he felt an immediate attraction to John, he would've never guessed it would be this strong this quickly. With another nod, he licks his lips to get a small example of how John's mouth tastes as he tries to straighten any of his clothes that were displaced by their movements.
"You learn something new every day." he says lightly. "Like how many positives there are to having a car and driver so you can ride in the backseat."
"Oh, it has more advantages than that, some of which I might have shown you if the trip had been longer," John says. He makes up his mind that if things progress, one day he'll show those advantages to Ben. "Not that I have a car and driver all the time like some people get to, but it does have many positives." He opens the door to let Ben get out first. "Would you like the car to wait?" he asks, feeling he should give Ben that option. He doesn't want to presume that Ben will stay all night, and though he could always get a cab or even lend him his own car, he feels that kind of decision should be Ben's.
Ben looks at John for a moment and then smiles as he shakes his head. "No. I can call a cab if it's necessary later. Although right now I'm thinking I won't be needing a ride back to my hotel for awhile." He suddenly realizes he's being very presumptive. "Unless of course you've changed your mind after the car ride?"
He stands outside the car studying the other man as he waits for his answer. He really wants to see where this could lead them, but he doesn't want to pressure John into something that isn't right for him.
"No, not at all!" John moves closer again. "I'll call you a cab when," and if, he thinks to himself, "necessary. Just wanted to be sure you were where you wanted to be. Strange city and all that."
Shaking his head, he lets the driver know he can leave for the night and leads Ben into his house, fumbling just a bit with the keys. "This is a bit awkward," John says. "I don't know...how to act in this situation. But I'm trying."
"It is a little awkward." he agrees. "You're doing fine though. Just be yourself and it will all work out like it should. Or at least that's what I'm trying to tell myself. Besides the hardest part is already over, we've met and did the weird is he or isn't he interested thing. You already know I'm interested and now it's just talking and seeing if we have chemistry. Or are you holding back on some huge secret that will change everything?" he asked teasingly.
"I can't think of anything," John teases back as he locks the door behind them. "You already know how I feel about men, and that I've been in hospital, and that hasn't chased you off." He does wonder, a little, if his slightly more exotic tastes could put Ben off, but that's not likely to be an issue tonight. His current wish is to just fuck Ben through the mattress, plain and simple, though he's willing to go with other places or acts, depending on how it all goes. And maybe with not having sex at all tonight, though that is considerably less an option now than it had been earlier.
"So, what do you want to know?" he asks as he leads Ben into the living room. There are posters and photographs of him in various places, though not all over. He's not vain, but he does like the record of his work.
"I'm not easily chased off once I decide I want something." he flashes a grin as he stops to examine each poster or photograph he sees. "What do you think I should know? Besides how you feel about men and that you were in the hospital. Neither of which seems like an offense so great as to chase me off. In fact, the first one is definitely a major positive in my mind. If you didn't like men it would've made the whole kissing thing a lot more awkward I would think."
He turns toward John and gives him a slight smirk that would be a warning to John if he knew him better. "Any dark secrets or skeletons in your closet you want to discuss? You don't pick up guys from charity events and hold them hostage in your basement do you? No wife tucked into an upstairs bedroom? Secretly prefer sex with horses over men?" Ben manages to keep his same expression throughout all the ridiculous questions and waiting for John's answers.
John laughs at Ben's questions. He's got an even worse sense of humour than John's. Or better, depending on the perspective. "Yes, the liking men is very definitely a good thing. Or just liking you might have been enough, because I do. Like you. Beyond anything else, I like you, Ben," John says, softly.
"No pick ups, and anyone I hold in the basement wants to be there," he replies. "And no wife. I've never even touched a woman, sexually, and if I were to get married, I'd have to go to Canada - or back to England. Horses? No, really. That's a hard limit." He bites his lip at the use of the term, but it really is.
"Well since I happen to truly like you as well, I'd say we're already off to a good start." he smiles, glad his humor was well accepted instead of scaring John off. "I am intrigued by this basement idea though and how many people who would want to be are there." He takes a minute to look over John again, his approval evident. "Because from my perspective you could definitely have a huge group of men who would willingly worship you. Sexy and nice is definitely an appealing combination after all. And I suppose I'll just deal with my disappointment about the horses." he says, having to add a little of his humor at the end.
"No one's there right now," John says. "I have a very empty basement. But it's okay. It's warmer up here," he laughs softly. "And I appreciate the compliment." He doesn't mention the horses, they're definitely not what are on his mind right now. He presses a button on the remote and soft music comes from the stereo. "Hope you don't mind, I like music," he says, simply.
He shakes his head and smiles. "I don't mind at all. I've always loved listening to music. Unfortunately, I've never had much luck with making it myself." Ben finishes up his circle around the room and examining all the posters and such. "You obviously don't have that problem from what I see here. I'm feeling more and more like I should have known who you were when I first met you. My lack of culture is definitely showing I'm afraid."
Ben smiles a little wider and moves until there's only a foot or so separating them. "I guess I'll just have to get the crash course in all your talents." he adds softly.
"Music has always been in my life. My mum had a record shop back in Glasgow, and she tells some rather embarrassing stories about what I used to get up to - and no, I will not repeat them before you ask," John grins. "Not on our first date, at least. And I still don't think I'm that well known. It's not like I'm Elvis. You just haven't been exposed to the right culture, that's all."
Finally, John starts to move closer to Ben. "I have plenty of talents I could show you..."
Completely serious now, Ben watches John closing the remaining distance between them. "I have to say I'm definitely looking forward to every thing you want to show me." he replies softly. He slowly licks his lips as his eyes fall on John's lips and he remembers what it felt like to kiss him. Instantly, he feels the immense desire to have a repeat performance. He leaves his expression open so John can see the desire as well.
All John is aware of is the soft jazz music and Ben as he moves closer and takes Ben in his arms. He seems to fit there, very well. "I have so many things to show you," John whispers before his lips touch Ben's again, this time harder than in the car.
Just like in the car, Ben immediately opens his lips to John. Sliding his hands around John's waist, Ben trails his fingers along the waistband of John's pants. He wants the contact with skin, but is concentrating for the moment on the contact between their mouths. The hardness of the kiss is so good and makes him want more. Using his hands on John's back, Ben presses his body forward to show just how much he is enjoying this.
Ben's mouth is hot and wet, and John wonders briefly what it would feel like in other places, but for now, just the kiss is enough exploration. He opens his mouth more and traces Ben's teeth with his tongue as he feels Ben press against him. He wants more, but he wants this to last forever, too. "Ben..." he whispers into his mouth, soft and hot. "Ben."
His body shudders just a bit at his name being whispered. Meeting John's tongue with the tip of his own, Ben teases and tastes and still doesn't get his fill. He's torn between impatience, wanting everything now and wanting to take it slow, explore every bit of the experience. He fists his hands in John's shirt and lets the other man lead him wherever John wants to go. Even with the brief time they've known each other, Ben can already feel the need to submit that he's pushed back with every relationship so far.
"Ben... god," John moans his name as he moves back. "I want you, so much..." he presses against Ben again, letting him feel how true that is. "But I need to know..." he takes a deep breath. "Do you..." he really hasn't ever had to deal with something this new, this potentially fragile, in far too long. The few times he hasn't been with people he worked with, he took advantage of the in house boys at Citadel. "What don't you like?" he finishes, unable to think of any other way to put it.
With eyes already dazed just from their kissing, Ben looks at John. He's a little confused with the question as he senses even through his substantial arousal that there is more to the question then it first appears. "I'm not . . .I'm not sure what you mean." he says softly as he finally gets his gaze off of John's mouth and up to his eyes. "I can't think of anything I don't want to try with you." He hopes that was a good enough answer or that John will at least explain what kind of answer he really wants so nothing can get in the way of this moment and what Ben thinks could happen.
"It's okay," John says, softly. "I just..." he's trying to find the words. It's not difficult because of shame or anything of that nature, it's just not easy to find the right words. "I have what some might call... exotic tastes when it comes to sex," he says. "Nothing like the horses," he tries to lighten the moment a little. "I don't know how far it's likely to go now, but it's probably something you should know for later, because there is going to be a later...I hope. Nothing heavy, exactly, just..." he trails off, thinking he's probably confused Ben even more.
"Exotic tastes?" he asks, licking his lips and looking intrigued. He appreciates the lightening of the moment, but chooses to ignore the horse comment and focus on what really interests him at this point. Ben has been with other people who have mentioned different tastes in sex, but usually it ends up just being something as simple as wanting to try different positions or do it somewhere besides a bedroom so he's trying not to get his expectations up. Still, this feels different then it has before. "What exactly do you consider exotic and what part do you see me playing in it?"
"To start with, I don't see you doing anything you don't want to do - ever," John says, needing to say this first. "Beyond that... I want to explore with you." He smiles. "And I thought I'd done everything... yet here I am as nervous as if it were my first time. Have you ever... been tied up?" he asks, gauging things with a fairly mild - as far as kink goes - activity.
He shakes his head and whispers "no, but I always wanted to try it." It's easier then he thought it would be to admit that, so he decides to try admitting more. It doesn't seem fair that John has to be the only one putting himself on the line after all. "Everyone I've been with has went for fairly basic sex with a couple changes in location or position. I never quite knew how to bring up the idea of trying something more adventurous with the few people I thought I could even trust doing something like tying me up or even whipping and spanking."
The silence is heavy and anticipatory. John can't believe his luck, that Ben has an interest in this kind of thing at all is more than he could have hoped, but to get to be the one to introduce him to it...
"You... would like to try that kind of thing?" he asks, needing to hear it directly from Ben. "I don't know how far I'd want to go right now, but like I said, I see this being more than just now..."
An image of Ben, tied to his bed, ass reddened by his hand comes into his mind and he has to bite back a moan at how much just the thought turns him on.
"I was never the most social person even in college." he says in a round about way of answering the question. "When I knew people or had a few drinks I could be engaging but never really outgoing to where I would be the one to introduce myself to strangers and such. I guess that carries over because while I bought my first book about fetishes and such my first year of college, I never brought it up with anyone. Part of that is probably because I've only had one really serious relationship and a lot of one-night stands, but I think a lot is because I might have had the courage to buy several more books on the subject, but none of them suggested how to get started."
He takes a deep breath before looking into John's eyes. "So yeah, I would love to try that kind of thing. Just from what I've done alone I would say that I would definitely enjoy the chance. Especially with you."
"You know, while books are a good theoretical resource, they do tend to not have much advice on actually finding someone," John says. "There's a reason I was a virgin until I was nineteen - and that's as in not doing anything beyond a few drunken, experimental on the other guy's part kisses, virgin." He doesn't mind admitting this to Ben, it feels right. "You aren't the only one who's had one night stands, but we went over that."
Brushing a finger softly over Ben's cheek, John smiles. "So, what have you done alone?"
Ben smiles a little shyly as he realizes how much he's already revealed that he's never told anyone else before and how much more he'd willingly say if only asked to. "I've tried different dildos and vibrators. Kept myself from having an orgasm for a bit until I just couldn't push it back any longer. And I've . . .uh . . .tried some hot wax and stuff that caused a little pain." His face is definitely redder then normal when he finishes talking but at the same time he's really happy he's taking this chance. Besides, it doesn't seem like that big of a gamble when John already seems to accept him as he is so far.
Oh, fuck... just thinking of Ben trying those things is doing dangerous things to John's control. But this is a good thing. "Experimentation is good," he nods. "How much pain?" he asks, curiously. "I have different levels of comfort when it comes to pain, but I don't do the heavy stuff and I rarely draw blood, intentionally or otherwise. How far can you see yourself going with that?" He wants to know everything, even though he really just wants to feel Ben this first time. Still, knowing what Ben likes - and he's already picked up on the cues that he's submissive - will be helpful for them both.
"I don't think I'd like going so far as blood being drawn, at least not intentionally." he admits. "I really liked the wax though and it left marks and I've always been into biting and kind of rougher then normal sex when I could find someone who didn't mind doing it. As for how far I'd go, I'm not sure. I know every thing I've done so far hasn't felt like nearly far enough. But if you aren't comfortable with the pain thing I understand completely." He doesn't want to push for too much and alienate John when they were first getting started, but at the same time he is already hoping to experiment and see just how far he can go.
He looks down for a moment before looking at John with a questioning expression. "What do you consider the heavy stuff and which side do you prefer to be on during it?"
"Marks," John whispers, liking that idea a lot. "I like wax, yes..." and he knows biting will happen, he might even have to lean over and sink his teeth into Ben's neck to relieve some tension. "I think pain needs to be built up to, on both sides of the whip, or whatever else you're using to inflict it. It's a trust issue, and while I'm trusting you with a great deal, it will take time to get there."
John pauses, giving Ben a chance to take his words in.
"Heavy stuff... beatings so intense the recipient can't walk for a week after, drawing blood enough to stain, permanent marks or injuries that aren't intentional. I will not do any of that, ever. Pain is a pleasure when it's done the right way, not a chore or an injury. And I prefer to be the one wielding the whip, but I think... with the right person, I might be able to think about going under the whip some of the time." He is surprised he can admit the last, but it's Ben. And he knows he can trust him that far. "What about you?" He has picked up the cues, but it would be good to hear Ben's own thoughts.
Ben is definitely getting flashes of images of what all this talking could lead to. He's trying hard to seem cool and under control when all he really wants to do is give up all this talking and see what happens when they just let go of everything. "It's definitely a trust issue which is probably why I've never brought it up to anyone else. I do trust you though. I want to try whatever you're comfortable with and find what I might enjoy. I want to know how it feels when they pain and pleasure get mixed up. I want you to show me, teach me."
"For tonight," John says, "I think I just want to feel you, fuck you... oh, god, do I want to get inside you, you have no idea how much..." he's breathing shallowly, trying to restrain himself from leaping on Ben just yet. "But I would be very honoured to teach you, help you in any way I can." He already knows that he's going to be bringing Citadel up as soon as it feels right, though that won't be tonight, he has other plans for them tonight. "But we can do a little... experimenting in bed. Will you put yourself in my hands?"
"Your hands and whatever else you want." Ben agrees with a smile that says he's pretty much done with talking for the moment. Instead, he slides one of his hands slowly up John's chest until it hooks around the back of John's neck and then tugs until he can feel their lips meet. "Oh yeah." he breathes out with relief and pleasure. "I want you to fuck me. I want to feel you so far inside of me that I feel it everywhere."
"We probably need to go somewhere else for that to happen," John says, but he kisses Ben long and deep before he moves at all. There's one last question. "In your reading, I'm presuming you came across the concept of a safeword? Do you have one? It wouldn't be a bad idea to have one, even though I hope you won't be begging me to stop. Mine, in case I need to use it, is Titan." He stands up, his pants stretching across his hard cock, and reaches a hand down to Ben.
"Safe words? Yeah, I've heard about them. Although I can't see me needing it tonight, I always thought I'd go with something simple since I tend to get pretty mindless during sex." he admits as he takes John's hand and stands up. "The book I read first suggested going with red since we tend to associate it with stopping."
He bites into his lower lip a little nervously. "Anything else we need to cover before you fuck me?"
"Sounds good for now, we'll revisit it later if needed," John nods. "And mindless is a really good way to be during sex," he adds. "I'm going to enjoy seeing you that way... and no, we've covered everything. Come upstairs with me, Ben." He leads him through the house, as quickly as he can. Ben doesn't seem to mind that.
Ben definitely doesn't mind the quickness or being led. He takes a moment to enjoy watching John moving directly in front of him before he forces himself to pay attention to house around him in an effort to keep from going after John now and having them end up on a couch instead of a comfortable bed. Until they reached the bedroom or wherever they were headed, at least Ben had a very enjoyable view directly in front of him.
It seems to take longer to get to the stairs, but John knows it's just because he wants this part to be done. He's looking back and smiling at Ben, then he turns, leading Ben up the stairs, then to his bedroom at last. He can't help it, once the door closes, he pushes Ben against it, unable to resist touching him any longer. He presses Ben into the door, thrusting against him, kissing him deeply, softly biting his lip.
What a reward for patience, Ben thinks, sliding his hands around and burying one of them in John's hair. His tongue immediately starts exploring, tracing over John's teeth and then beyond. His free hand is sliding down and enjoying the feel of contact even if there is a layer of shirt between them. As soon as his free hand reaches the waistband of John's pants though, Ben begins working to get the shirt pulled up enough to erase any barrier between his hand and the skin he so wants to touch.
"You know," John murmurs softly against Ben's skin. "I never have liked formal wear..." He's struggling as much with Ben's clothes as Ben is with his. "Even if you do look absolutely edible in it." He nips Ben's ear lightly, as he rubs Ben's cock through his pants.
"Fuck." he presses into John's hand with a low moan. "Just want it all off, want to touch you." He reluctantly slides his hand out of John's hair and decides in a brief moment of clarity that he needs to start with the buttons on the shirt or getting off the jacket. If he starts with the pants there's no way he'll make it back to the shirt before he gets distracted. "Why couldn't we have met at a nude beach or something." he mutters as he pushes off the other's jacket while trying not to take too many detours to explore.
John laughs. "I'll take you one day," he promises. "But yes. I know what you mean..." He wants to encourage Ben's explorations but then that would mean... so he doesn't, he helps Ben and it's going okay. Really okay. He wishes for a moment that they wouldn't need to use condoms, but he knows better than that. So instead he licks down Ben's chest, following the path of the open shirt. "Mmmm," he hums against him. He knows he's being distracting but he has a bit of a problem caring about that right now.
The mouth on his chest is definitely a distraction, but somehow Ben manages to get John's jacket and shirt off. The problem then lies in getting off the other's pants without dislodging the mouth he's enjoying a lot. He manages the button and zipper before getting distracted himself after sliding his hand down inside to find what he really wants. "You feel so amazing. Can't get enough of you."
"God, Ben!" John cries out at the first touch, then he bites, harder than he'd intended. He licks it to soothe the pain, while he's... getting incredibly turned on just by Ben's hand on him. "Ben..." he whispers again. "Do you know what you do to me? Do you know how much I want you?"
He groans at the harder bite, turned on even more by the pain and just having John here. "Hopefully I do something close to what you do to me." he manages to say before pushing into another kiss. "Show me how much you want me." he whispers into the kiss. "I want you so much."
John grins, giving a little twist of his hips, and as he'd planned, his pants fall right off. "You asked me to show you?" he grins. "I don't pull that particular little trick out for just anyone...in fact, only the person who taught it to me and you..." he kicks off the pants and shoes and stands, naked, regretting only that he's had to stop touching Ben briefly. His hands move toward Ben's belt.
Ben stands shocked for a moment after the move, his eyes naturally drawn to all the wonderful bare skin. As soon as John is close enough again, Ben reaches down and encircles him again. It's still not enough contact for him though and so he lowers his head and starts exploring John's neck and shoulders with his mouth and just the slightest amount of teeth. "You're so amazingly sexy." he says against John's skin.
"You think so?" John teases, pushing Ben's pants down. "I think you're... oh, fuck, that's...yeah, there... pretty sexy too..." he arches his neck for Ben's teeth. "You know, there's a nice big bed, just a few feet across the room," he says, hands moving over Ben's skin.
Ben licks the spot on John's neck again before biting a little bit harder. He really does love teeth a lot, biting and being bit and it shows. "Bed would be good." he agrees but doesn't stop his exploration with his mouth or his hands. If anything, he increases his focus on the task in front of him.
While it is tempting to stay here, very tempting when Ben bites him again, John thinks now might be a very good time to assert himself a little. "Bed. Now." he says, and moves out of Ben's reach. "Trust me, it'll be more comfortable." He walks the few feet, feeling Ben's eyes on him as he pulls the covers down. "Get over here, Ben."
Responding to the commanding tone and the fact what he wants is by the bed, Ben moves quickly. What is a little surprising to him is that when he gets there he doesn't immediately start off where he was interrupted. Instead, he stands about a foot for John and waits to see what he wants now.
"Come closer," John says. "I want to see you lying across my bed. I can't promise this will be slow," he says. "I'd like to, and I won't hurt you, but I need... I want you so much, Ben. I want to feel you around me, I want to be so deep inside you that I feel like I'm a part of you." He moves to the bedstand for condoms and lube, but before he does, he whispers. "I want to see you across my bed when I turn around, Ben."
"It doesn't have to be slow." he says softly as he moves slowly closer. Only when he hears the command in the whisper does he hurry his movements more. Within a second he's on the bed but quickly realizes he doesn't know exactly how John wants him. "Um . . ." he says a little bit nervously, not wanting to mess this up before it's even really begun. ". . .how exactly do you want me on the bed?"
"I have to remember how long it is since I've really done this," John answers. "On your back, Ben. I want to be able to see you." He waits a moment, giving Ben the chance to get settled, before turning to see him. "Oh, that's perfect," John says. "You're... gorgeous." It's the only word to describe Ben.
He blushes. Actually blushes which embarrasses him more and causes his face to flush even more. He looks to the side as he tries to regain at least a little bit of composure. "Thanks." he says in a whisper that is barely audible. He wants to be that guy who is confident in how he looks and doesn't get flustered with compliments, but he knows that will probably never be the person he is so he tries to fake it as much as he can and get through the moments when it becomes apparent that he isn't sure of himself.
He's even more beautiful when he blushes, but John knows better than to say that aloud. He wonders why Ben seems to have so much trouble accepting simple compliments, but that's a question for another time, another place. He joins Ben on the bed, kissing him again. "I could just kiss you all night," he murmurs into Ben's mouth. "Kiss you until we both come, all over each other."
"I'm not sure I'd complain about that." he says with a smile, relieved John didn't push for an explanation of why he had problems with compliments. "Although the idea of having you buried deep inside of me is certainly appealing as well. In the end though, I guess it's up to you how you'd like to come. I'd like to add another option for your enjoyment though -- you could always try it buried deep in my mouth if my ass isn't appealing enough."
"If I were up for it, I'd go for all three," John answers, biting Ben's neck, not quite enough to leave a mark. "But once is about my limit right now. Still, soon... this is going to happen again, you know. Again and again and again if I have anything to say about it. And how could you think your ass is unappealing?" he looks at Ben, shaking his head. "You have an incredible ass. And an incredible mouth. Both of which I fully intend to explore at my leisure." He cups Ben's ass, pulling him nearer.
"I'd like this to happen a lot more." Ben nods with a small smile. "But even once right now sounds really, really good. Once with you sounds like it would be heaven." He mentally makes note of the compliments for his ass and mouth but doesn't respond, still a little off kilter from the previous compliment and not wanting to make a big deal over any of it. "You haven't told me yet how you want to come though. I want to make you come so hard that you forget everything but the two of us and how good it feels between us."
"Yes, once, right now, does seem like an excellent idea. And I want your ass, tonight, Ben." John kisses him again. "The rest will wait." He's plastered against Ben, feeling all his skin as he kisses down to lick one of Ben's nipples, then biting it softly. He reaches for the condom and lube as he nibbles, his teeth playing with Ben's nipple.
"Oh." he gasps at the teeth playing with his nipple. He's always loved teeth but no one he's been with has done more then a brief bite here or there. To have his kink used again and again is just pushing every button including some he didn't know he had. "More ... please." he almost begs. "I want you inside of me so much."
"That's good, because I want to be inside you," John raises his head to whisper the words. As he returns to the nipping and biting, he opens the lube one-handed and slicks his fingers so he can prepare Ben. He pushes one in, slowly, feeling Ben open around him as he does. "Oh..." he says quietly, pressing in deeper.
Ben works to try to relax around the finger when the rest of him is so tight with pleasure from what John is doing. "More please." he asks even though he knows he's probably a little tight since he hasn't had a lot of practice doing this lately. Once or twice over a month ago doesn't help to loosen him after all. "So good John. Please more."
"There'll be more," John promises, moving up so he can whisper into Ben's ear. "You feel so hot, Ben, so tight and hot around me. So good..." his finger goes deeper and he moves around, searching for Ben's prostate, as he presses another finger into Ben. "How many fingers have you taken?" he asks, and that's when he finds the nub and presses, hard. It's probably not fair to ask something just before then, but John has never said he wasn't a tease in some ways.
Ben was planning on answering John, really he had every intention, but then his world seemed to turn on its axis. Suddenly everything seemed a lot less important as long as that finger continued doing exactly what it had begun. So instead of an answer to John's question, Ben let out a long and deep moan. There were probably several curses in there as well but luckily it was pretty much incomprehensible.
"I asked you a question," John says, his tone slightly serious, though honestly he'll be surprised if Ben can answer him yet. "Do you think you can answer me?" Another finger moves carefully inside Ben. "I really do need to know," he says, kissing Ben's neck. "I might give you another if you can take it..." He moves his fingers inside Ben, twisting them slightly.
He tries to speak, really he does but he's still gasping at how incredible the fingers feel. So instead of words, he presses down against the fingers trying to get more inside of him. He also tilts his head to the side giving John plenty of room to do whatever he wants to the skin being offered. Ben can only hope that John can understand the sounds he makes enough to never stop.
Laughing, John bites down, and figuring that Ben would have said not to, because even in the throes of pleasure, he would have found a way, if he didn't want another, a fourth finger moves inside Ben and stretches him more. He's not going to stop, his cock is demanding that it replace his fingers yesterday, he wants Ben so very much. He would ask Ben if he's ready, but he figures he can tell. Then he realises he can't unwrap the condom one-handed and curses himself for not doing that before. But he has to take his fingers out, slowly, one at a time. Then he moves back and rips the foil packet almost brutally, slicking his cock and rolling it down. "I'm coming, Ben," he says.
Ben was extremely happy that John continued what he started despite the fact he himself wasn't able to vocalize what he wanted. The biting and the fingers stretching him out were so incredible and he felt like he was floating until it all started to withdraw. He still wasn't quite up to talking yet, but he did try to get his point across by trying to get those fingers back in where he thought they belonged. Unfortunately, as much as he tried to get the fingers back they were gone and a whimper left his throat in protest of the fact. He heard John promising he was coming but even that didn't quite make sense when he was balancing on the edge of pleasure like this.
John moves down to kiss Ben again, lining himself up to move into him, slowly, pushing against his hole with the head of his cock. He pushes, and is in, just the head, and even through the condom Ben is so hot and he hopes he can last long enough to make this as good as everything else has been for them both. He's looking down at Ben, taking it slow, giving him a chance to get used to it. He knows if it isn't okay, Ben will let him know, so he stays silent but for the moans coming from his lips as he eases into Ben.
Ben looks into John's eyes with a mixture of awe and need. It all feels so incredibly good and intense in a way that he's not sure he's prepared for but wants just the same. "John . . ." he manages to whisper hoarsely. "Please." He slides his hands slowly up until he can hold onto John's shoulders for the anchor he needs to reality. "More. Good. Not going to last." He hopes he's making at least enough sense so John is aware he's okay and enjoying this more then he thought possible.
He has to move, even though he feels he could stay here, inside Ben, forever. "Yes, Ben. More. Me either..." his words a jumble but the intent should come across if the words themselves don't. He moves almost out of Ben, and plunges back into him, liking the noises Ben makes when he does. "God, so good, want you, need you," John mutters senselessly.
Ben is definitely not quiet as he feels John almost leaving him completely before plunging back inside. His hands on John's shoulders dig in with the slight edge of pain that is mixed with so much pleasure. He fights to tighten around John as he withdraws, wanting nothing more then to keep him inside of him forever. He can only hope his whimpers and moans are enough to convince John of it.
"God, Ben," John moans, thrusting shallowly, wanting to be inside Ben for as long as possible. He knows this is coming to an end, more quickly than he'd really like it to, but the slow movements seem to stretch it out a bit. "Getting, oh... close..." He wraps a hand around Ben's cock, stroking slowly. "So good, your cock in my hand..." He rubs the head of his cock over Ben's prostate, over and over.
His ass tightens around John's cock with pleasure at the dual stimulation. He's gasping for air a little from what they're doing. Somehow despite the ever-increasing pleasure he feels he manages to hold onto a slight bit of his control. "You're so sexy like this." he says as he gazes at John. "I don't know how long I can hold on."
"Then don't," John manages to say. "Come for me, Ben." He's still moving, slowly, but increasing his speed slightly, feeling his orgasm rise inside him. "I want to see you come, I want to know I did that," John finds the words, though they sound a little harsh through his heavy breathing. "I want to see you lose it for me, Ben."
He was barely hanging on to his control and being given permission to come is all it takes to snap that fragile control. Ben feels a couple more thrusts pushing into him before everything seems to explode. His ass tightens with the power of his release as does the rest of his body. With his head tilted back in pleasure, Ben moans low in his throat. He tries to keep his eyes open wanting to see John coming. "Please." he pleads. "Let go for me."
He's only been waiting for Ben to come first, and with Ben's plea, John does let go, his cock stiffening even more, impossibly he thinks, then he comes, his cock buried as far inside Ben as it will go, only the condom between them. He knows he wants it to be without a barrier one day. He throws his head back and a long moan comes from him, before he collapses forward onto Ben, still inside him though he's softening now.
Once he's recovered a little bit more, Ben slides his arms around John to hold him close, wanting the reassurance that it wasn't all just a dream that skin on skin contact could give. "Wow." he whispers as he nuzzles his face into John's neck until he's as wrapped around and in John as he can possibly get.
"Yes, wow," John agrees, liking the feeling of their skin taught. "My god, Ben..." he's in pleasure shock, still, it wasn't just good sex - he's had that before. There's more here, hidden for now, but he knows it's here. "That was..." he doesn't even have the words to say.
"Mmmm." Ben hums in a sort of agreement against John's neck. He's firmly entwined and has no immediate plans to move until absolutely necessary. He can't remember the last time he felt this comfortable and at peace. He knew it was ridiculous considering they just met, but there was definitely something there between them that he wanted the chance to explore if possible. So until John forced him away or another need became pressing, he was going to soak up the feel of bare skin sliding against bare skin and the slight burn of being stretched around John's cock.
"You're staying," John says, not even a question. "I'm too tired to get up and make a call for a cab and I don't want to let you go." He will let him go if Ben really wants to go, but he has the feeling he doesn't. He stops talking and just holds Ben. It's enough. More than enough. He could do this forever too. He realises that word keeps coming up, but it doesn't bother him at all. Not like this, not with Ben. And that feeling of "Ben" is at once new and familiar. He smiles against Ben's hair.
"Of course." he nods slightly in agreement. He doesn't want to leave, certainly not to get in a cab that would take him back to another hotel room. What he considered several hours ago to be an incredible existence filled with travel and art now seemed empty when he compared it to what he just experienced or even how it felt to just be held as if he was something to cherish and protect.
"I want to wake up holding you," John says. "I want to know what you look like when you sleep..." he cuts himself off, a moan escaping as his cock softens enough to slip out of Ben. "Just a second," he murmurs, reaching to slip the condom off his cock and tie it. He throws it carelessly into the wastebasket beside the bed and comes back to Ben in a matter of a few seconds. "I don't think I want to let you go tonight..." or ever, but he doesn't know if he should say that. Even with how it is, it might not be right yet. He just doesn't know.
For the couple of seconds John releases him to throw away the condom Ben feels bereft. It's only once he's back in the warmth of John's arms that he relaxes again. "Please don't let go." he whispers. He knows that he is giving a lot away about how important this was to him but figures out it's worth the risk to him. John needs to know that this was more then just sexual gratification to him although that part was incredible. It's the connection Ben feels growing between the two of them that is what Ben wants to encourage and hold onto.
"I won't let you go," John promises as he tightens his hold on Ben. He's so tired, but he wants to assure Ben, let him know. "I'll hold you all night and I'll even cook breakfast," he smiles. "How does that sound?" He's trying to stifle a yawn, but not doing very well at it. "Sorry," he apologises.
"Don't apologize." he says softly. While he's not yawning, he feels completely exhausted and the idea of just going to sleep wrapped up like this is suddenly all he wants. He places the softest of kisses on the skin he's nuzzled into and whispers again. "Go to sleep and we'll figure everything out tomorrow. Good night John. Sleep well."
"Tomorrow," John murmurs, eyes drifting closed, arms wrapping tighter around Ben. "Together..." he whispers. "Good night, Ben, and thank you." He's asleep a moment later.
(players only, takes place the night of December 16, follows this)
"God," John says as they make their way outside. "I don't know if I was as ready for this as I thought I was. But I'm glad I came. I got to meet you," he smiles at Ben, leaning on him just a little. He signals for the car and sinks into it gratefully when it gets there.
"Sorry, give me a few minutes," John murmurs, rolling his head slowly, trying to work the kinks out of his neck. He pours himself some water from the bar and swallows a pill. "Should be better in a few," he murmurs. "Have a drink if you like."
Instead of reaching for a drink, Ben shifts on the seat and raises his hands to gently massage John's neck. "Take as much time as you need." he says softly. "While I'm glad you were there tonight as well, it seems like that was a lot of pressure to put yourself under so soon after being sick." He continues massaging gently, working out each knotted muscle as he finds it. While he is enjoying touching John, his main intent really is to ease his discomfort and Ben can only hope John sees it that way as well.
"Oh, Ben... god, that's amazing," John says, just as softly. "I maybe did overdo things. I thought I was ready, but... still, I will not regret it. Not a bit." He relaxes under Ben's touches. "You're better than the pills," he says. "Natural high, maybe." He's enjoying the touches, but it's that Ben would do this for him that's really wonderful. "You know, no one's ever..." he is surprised as he realises this. "I don't think anyone outside of my family has ever touched me for non-sexual reasons. Maybe some of my friends, but not like this..."
He thinks about it for a minute as he continues to massage John's neck, sliding his hands down enough to include his shoulders as well. "I'm glad it's helping you to feel better." he says thoughtfully. "I'm also glad you're enjoying it and not offended. I probably should have asked you before I touched. I do apologize after the fact. I hope you know all you would have to do is tell me to stop and I would."
Ben is silent for a minute longer as he continues to contemplate John's words. "I think most of us are so busy with our jobs and obligations that we forget just how important a simple touch can be. I also think most of us are afraid of offending others if we do touch them, even if it's not sexual in any way."
"I don't think you could do anything to offend me," John says. "And it is wonderful... don't you dare stop," he grins. "I don't want you to. I'm glad you felt able to just... do it." He thinks on the other things Ben said.
"I know what you mean, about possibly offending people," John says after a pause. "Sometimes all I want is to be held and I don't think I've ever had that, except after sex. Like I had to have sex to get to that point. And I'm sure you've met the gay guys who think fucking is just fine but anything else is too un-manly?" He tries not to sound bitter at that.
"Yeah, I've definitely met those guys. I think I went through a period where those were the only guys I met in fact. It almost made me want to try women again. Almost." he grinned before getting serious. "I've always wondered if those were the so-called normal gay men and I was the weird one who actually enjoyed being held or holding someone or even kissing for the sake of kissing instead as a sort of 'hello, want to fuck.' kind of thing."
Ben shifts a little more on the seat even as he continues to massage the muscles under his hands. "Let me know if I push too hard." he leans his head down just a bit to whisper softly.
"I think those guys are responsible for half the stereotypes out there," John says. "And yeah, I had that period too. Like they were all that was out there for a while. Though I have to admit, I didn't get quite desperate enough to consider women. But I've been lucky. I never had to." He arches a little into Ben's touch. "Mmmm. Those guys don't know what they're missing if you ask me."
"And if you whisper like that again," he says, unable to stop the words. "The only thing too hard will be me."
Unable to resist temptation, a problem he's always had, Ben leans just the slightest bit closer and whispers again. "Promise?" He knows he should pull back again but instead takes a moment to just enjoy being so close he can feel the warmth of John's skin radiating up. His hands have slowed to a very slow massaging motion but they haven't quite fallen to the point of caress instead of massage. Yet.
On cue, John's cock starts to fill and harden. "You can feel if you want," he says, daringly. "But remember, I did warn you..." He leans back, pressing a soft kiss to Ben's neck. "And another warning, we only have a few blocks to go." He presses closer to Ben, making it clear that any further exploration is very welcome.
With a low moan, he gives in and slides his hands slowly from John's shoulders and trails them down his chest. "I was going to be good and not make this sexual yet. I was going to be good, but you're just too much to resist." he whispers now because he's not sure he can get his throat to work any better. Watching his hands as they move further down, he takes his time and his fingers just barely brush along the fabric of John's shirt.
"So was I," John replies, "but you're too tempting...." he can't help it, a low chuckle comes out, imagining Ben as temptation itself, which wouldn't be so far from reality. "And being good is *highly* overrated, don't you think?" Finally, he turns, claiming Ben's lips with his for the first time, unable to resist any longer.
He doesn't know why he's surprised that things ratchet up another notch when he feels Ben's lips open under his.
Ben can't help it, as soon as he feels John's lips on his he opens to him. Suddenly his entire attention is on the wet heat of lips and tongue. A small whimper escapes even as he tries to hold it back, but it's been so long since a kiss has felt this good. His hands are now firmly planted in the optimal position on John's head to make sure the kiss will last at least a little bit longer.
Kissing back, his tongue moving into Ben's mouth without a moment's thought, John wishes this could last forever, this moment of pure and complete happiness as he kisses Ben. Ben's whimper stirs one of his own as he tries to press himself into Ben even more.
That's when he realises that the car has stopped. And almost regrets having to stop the kiss so they can get out. But he moves back. "Car's stopped," he says, low and husky and full of promise.
He nods, hoping he doesn't look as shocked as he feels. What started out as a typical charity event had certainly taken a turn Ben never expected. Even though he felt an immediate attraction to John, he would've never guessed it would be this strong this quickly. With another nod, he licks his lips to get a small example of how John's mouth tastes as he tries to straighten any of his clothes that were displaced by their movements.
"You learn something new every day." he says lightly. "Like how many positives there are to having a car and driver so you can ride in the backseat."
"Oh, it has more advantages than that, some of which I might have shown you if the trip had been longer," John says. He makes up his mind that if things progress, one day he'll show those advantages to Ben. "Not that I have a car and driver all the time like some people get to, but it does have many positives." He opens the door to let Ben get out first. "Would you like the car to wait?" he asks, feeling he should give Ben that option. He doesn't want to presume that Ben will stay all night, and though he could always get a cab or even lend him his own car, he feels that kind of decision should be Ben's.
Ben looks at John for a moment and then smiles as he shakes his head. "No. I can call a cab if it's necessary later. Although right now I'm thinking I won't be needing a ride back to my hotel for awhile." He suddenly realizes he's being very presumptive. "Unless of course you've changed your mind after the car ride?"
He stands outside the car studying the other man as he waits for his answer. He really wants to see where this could lead them, but he doesn't want to pressure John into something that isn't right for him.
"No, not at all!" John moves closer again. "I'll call you a cab when," and if, he thinks to himself, "necessary. Just wanted to be sure you were where you wanted to be. Strange city and all that."
Shaking his head, he lets the driver know he can leave for the night and leads Ben into his house, fumbling just a bit with the keys. "This is a bit awkward," John says. "I don't know...how to act in this situation. But I'm trying."
"It is a little awkward." he agrees. "You're doing fine though. Just be yourself and it will all work out like it should. Or at least that's what I'm trying to tell myself. Besides the hardest part is already over, we've met and did the weird is he or isn't he interested thing. You already know I'm interested and now it's just talking and seeing if we have chemistry. Or are you holding back on some huge secret that will change everything?" he asked teasingly.
"I can't think of anything," John teases back as he locks the door behind them. "You already know how I feel about men, and that I've been in hospital, and that hasn't chased you off." He does wonder, a little, if his slightly more exotic tastes could put Ben off, but that's not likely to be an issue tonight. His current wish is to just fuck Ben through the mattress, plain and simple, though he's willing to go with other places or acts, depending on how it all goes. And maybe with not having sex at all tonight, though that is considerably less an option now than it had been earlier.
"So, what do you want to know?" he asks as he leads Ben into the living room. There are posters and photographs of him in various places, though not all over. He's not vain, but he does like the record of his work.
"I'm not easily chased off once I decide I want something." he flashes a grin as he stops to examine each poster or photograph he sees. "What do you think I should know? Besides how you feel about men and that you were in the hospital. Neither of which seems like an offense so great as to chase me off. In fact, the first one is definitely a major positive in my mind. If you didn't like men it would've made the whole kissing thing a lot more awkward I would think."
He turns toward John and gives him a slight smirk that would be a warning to John if he knew him better. "Any dark secrets or skeletons in your closet you want to discuss? You don't pick up guys from charity events and hold them hostage in your basement do you? No wife tucked into an upstairs bedroom? Secretly prefer sex with horses over men?" Ben manages to keep his same expression throughout all the ridiculous questions and waiting for John's answers.
John laughs at Ben's questions. He's got an even worse sense of humour than John's. Or better, depending on the perspective. "Yes, the liking men is very definitely a good thing. Or just liking you might have been enough, because I do. Like you. Beyond anything else, I like you, Ben," John says, softly.
"No pick ups, and anyone I hold in the basement wants to be there," he replies. "And no wife. I've never even touched a woman, sexually, and if I were to get married, I'd have to go to Canada - or back to England. Horses? No, really. That's a hard limit." He bites his lip at the use of the term, but it really is.
"Well since I happen to truly like you as well, I'd say we're already off to a good start." he smiles, glad his humor was well accepted instead of scaring John off. "I am intrigued by this basement idea though and how many people who would want to be are there." He takes a minute to look over John again, his approval evident. "Because from my perspective you could definitely have a huge group of men who would willingly worship you. Sexy and nice is definitely an appealing combination after all. And I suppose I'll just deal with my disappointment about the horses." he says, having to add a little of his humor at the end.
"No one's there right now," John says. "I have a very empty basement. But it's okay. It's warmer up here," he laughs softly. "And I appreciate the compliment." He doesn't mention the horses, they're definitely not what are on his mind right now. He presses a button on the remote and soft music comes from the stereo. "Hope you don't mind, I like music," he says, simply.
He shakes his head and smiles. "I don't mind at all. I've always loved listening to music. Unfortunately, I've never had much luck with making it myself." Ben finishes up his circle around the room and examining all the posters and such. "You obviously don't have that problem from what I see here. I'm feeling more and more like I should have known who you were when I first met you. My lack of culture is definitely showing I'm afraid."
Ben smiles a little wider and moves until there's only a foot or so separating them. "I guess I'll just have to get the crash course in all your talents." he adds softly.
"Music has always been in my life. My mum had a record shop back in Glasgow, and she tells some rather embarrassing stories about what I used to get up to - and no, I will not repeat them before you ask," John grins. "Not on our first date, at least. And I still don't think I'm that well known. It's not like I'm Elvis. You just haven't been exposed to the right culture, that's all."
Finally, John starts to move closer to Ben. "I have plenty of talents I could show you..."
Completely serious now, Ben watches John closing the remaining distance between them. "I have to say I'm definitely looking forward to every thing you want to show me." he replies softly. He slowly licks his lips as his eyes fall on John's lips and he remembers what it felt like to kiss him. Instantly, he feels the immense desire to have a repeat performance. He leaves his expression open so John can see the desire as well.
All John is aware of is the soft jazz music and Ben as he moves closer and takes Ben in his arms. He seems to fit there, very well. "I have so many things to show you," John whispers before his lips touch Ben's again, this time harder than in the car.
Just like in the car, Ben immediately opens his lips to John. Sliding his hands around John's waist, Ben trails his fingers along the waistband of John's pants. He wants the contact with skin, but is concentrating for the moment on the contact between their mouths. The hardness of the kiss is so good and makes him want more. Using his hands on John's back, Ben presses his body forward to show just how much he is enjoying this.
Ben's mouth is hot and wet, and John wonders briefly what it would feel like in other places, but for now, just the kiss is enough exploration. He opens his mouth more and traces Ben's teeth with his tongue as he feels Ben press against him. He wants more, but he wants this to last forever, too. "Ben..." he whispers into his mouth, soft and hot. "Ben."
His body shudders just a bit at his name being whispered. Meeting John's tongue with the tip of his own, Ben teases and tastes and still doesn't get his fill. He's torn between impatience, wanting everything now and wanting to take it slow, explore every bit of the experience. He fists his hands in John's shirt and lets the other man lead him wherever John wants to go. Even with the brief time they've known each other, Ben can already feel the need to submit that he's pushed back with every relationship so far.
"Ben... god," John moans his name as he moves back. "I want you, so much..." he presses against Ben again, letting him feel how true that is. "But I need to know..." he takes a deep breath. "Do you..." he really hasn't ever had to deal with something this new, this potentially fragile, in far too long. The few times he hasn't been with people he worked with, he took advantage of the in house boys at Citadel. "What don't you like?" he finishes, unable to think of any other way to put it.
With eyes already dazed just from their kissing, Ben looks at John. He's a little confused with the question as he senses even through his substantial arousal that there is more to the question then it first appears. "I'm not . . .I'm not sure what you mean." he says softly as he finally gets his gaze off of John's mouth and up to his eyes. "I can't think of anything I don't want to try with you." He hopes that was a good enough answer or that John will at least explain what kind of answer he really wants so nothing can get in the way of this moment and what Ben thinks could happen.
"It's okay," John says, softly. "I just..." he's trying to find the words. It's not difficult because of shame or anything of that nature, it's just not easy to find the right words. "I have what some might call... exotic tastes when it comes to sex," he says. "Nothing like the horses," he tries to lighten the moment a little. "I don't know how far it's likely to go now, but it's probably something you should know for later, because there is going to be a later...I hope. Nothing heavy, exactly, just..." he trails off, thinking he's probably confused Ben even more.
"Exotic tastes?" he asks, licking his lips and looking intrigued. He appreciates the lightening of the moment, but chooses to ignore the horse comment and focus on what really interests him at this point. Ben has been with other people who have mentioned different tastes in sex, but usually it ends up just being something as simple as wanting to try different positions or do it somewhere besides a bedroom so he's trying not to get his expectations up. Still, this feels different then it has before. "What exactly do you consider exotic and what part do you see me playing in it?"
"To start with, I don't see you doing anything you don't want to do - ever," John says, needing to say this first. "Beyond that... I want to explore with you." He smiles. "And I thought I'd done everything... yet here I am as nervous as if it were my first time. Have you ever... been tied up?" he asks, gauging things with a fairly mild - as far as kink goes - activity.
He shakes his head and whispers "no, but I always wanted to try it." It's easier then he thought it would be to admit that, so he decides to try admitting more. It doesn't seem fair that John has to be the only one putting himself on the line after all. "Everyone I've been with has went for fairly basic sex with a couple changes in location or position. I never quite knew how to bring up the idea of trying something more adventurous with the few people I thought I could even trust doing something like tying me up or even whipping and spanking."
The silence is heavy and anticipatory. John can't believe his luck, that Ben has an interest in this kind of thing at all is more than he could have hoped, but to get to be the one to introduce him to it...
"You... would like to try that kind of thing?" he asks, needing to hear it directly from Ben. "I don't know how far I'd want to go right now, but like I said, I see this being more than just now..."
An image of Ben, tied to his bed, ass reddened by his hand comes into his mind and he has to bite back a moan at how much just the thought turns him on.
"I was never the most social person even in college." he says in a round about way of answering the question. "When I knew people or had a few drinks I could be engaging but never really outgoing to where I would be the one to introduce myself to strangers and such. I guess that carries over because while I bought my first book about fetishes and such my first year of college, I never brought it up with anyone. Part of that is probably because I've only had one really serious relationship and a lot of one-night stands, but I think a lot is because I might have had the courage to buy several more books on the subject, but none of them suggested how to get started."
He takes a deep breath before looking into John's eyes. "So yeah, I would love to try that kind of thing. Just from what I've done alone I would say that I would definitely enjoy the chance. Especially with you."
"You know, while books are a good theoretical resource, they do tend to not have much advice on actually finding someone," John says. "There's a reason I was a virgin until I was nineteen - and that's as in not doing anything beyond a few drunken, experimental on the other guy's part kisses, virgin." He doesn't mind admitting this to Ben, it feels right. "You aren't the only one who's had one night stands, but we went over that."
Brushing a finger softly over Ben's cheek, John smiles. "So, what have you done alone?"
Ben smiles a little shyly as he realizes how much he's already revealed that he's never told anyone else before and how much more he'd willingly say if only asked to. "I've tried different dildos and vibrators. Kept myself from having an orgasm for a bit until I just couldn't push it back any longer. And I've . . .uh . . .tried some hot wax and stuff that caused a little pain." His face is definitely redder then normal when he finishes talking but at the same time he's really happy he's taking this chance. Besides, it doesn't seem like that big of a gamble when John already seems to accept him as he is so far.
Oh, fuck... just thinking of Ben trying those things is doing dangerous things to John's control. But this is a good thing. "Experimentation is good," he nods. "How much pain?" he asks, curiously. "I have different levels of comfort when it comes to pain, but I don't do the heavy stuff and I rarely draw blood, intentionally or otherwise. How far can you see yourself going with that?" He wants to know everything, even though he really just wants to feel Ben this first time. Still, knowing what Ben likes - and he's already picked up on the cues that he's submissive - will be helpful for them both.
"I don't think I'd like going so far as blood being drawn, at least not intentionally." he admits. "I really liked the wax though and it left marks and I've always been into biting and kind of rougher then normal sex when I could find someone who didn't mind doing it. As for how far I'd go, I'm not sure. I know every thing I've done so far hasn't felt like nearly far enough. But if you aren't comfortable with the pain thing I understand completely." He doesn't want to push for too much and alienate John when they were first getting started, but at the same time he is already hoping to experiment and see just how far he can go.
He looks down for a moment before looking at John with a questioning expression. "What do you consider the heavy stuff and which side do you prefer to be on during it?"
"Marks," John whispers, liking that idea a lot. "I like wax, yes..." and he knows biting will happen, he might even have to lean over and sink his teeth into Ben's neck to relieve some tension. "I think pain needs to be built up to, on both sides of the whip, or whatever else you're using to inflict it. It's a trust issue, and while I'm trusting you with a great deal, it will take time to get there."
John pauses, giving Ben a chance to take his words in.
"Heavy stuff... beatings so intense the recipient can't walk for a week after, drawing blood enough to stain, permanent marks or injuries that aren't intentional. I will not do any of that, ever. Pain is a pleasure when it's done the right way, not a chore or an injury. And I prefer to be the one wielding the whip, but I think... with the right person, I might be able to think about going under the whip some of the time." He is surprised he can admit the last, but it's Ben. And he knows he can trust him that far. "What about you?" He has picked up the cues, but it would be good to hear Ben's own thoughts.
Ben is definitely getting flashes of images of what all this talking could lead to. He's trying hard to seem cool and under control when all he really wants to do is give up all this talking and see what happens when they just let go of everything. "It's definitely a trust issue which is probably why I've never brought it up to anyone else. I do trust you though. I want to try whatever you're comfortable with and find what I might enjoy. I want to know how it feels when they pain and pleasure get mixed up. I want you to show me, teach me."
"For tonight," John says, "I think I just want to feel you, fuck you... oh, god, do I want to get inside you, you have no idea how much..." he's breathing shallowly, trying to restrain himself from leaping on Ben just yet. "But I would be very honoured to teach you, help you in any way I can." He already knows that he's going to be bringing Citadel up as soon as it feels right, though that won't be tonight, he has other plans for them tonight. "But we can do a little... experimenting in bed. Will you put yourself in my hands?"
"Your hands and whatever else you want." Ben agrees with a smile that says he's pretty much done with talking for the moment. Instead, he slides one of his hands slowly up John's chest until it hooks around the back of John's neck and then tugs until he can feel their lips meet. "Oh yeah." he breathes out with relief and pleasure. "I want you to fuck me. I want to feel you so far inside of me that I feel it everywhere."
"We probably need to go somewhere else for that to happen," John says, but he kisses Ben long and deep before he moves at all. There's one last question. "In your reading, I'm presuming you came across the concept of a safeword? Do you have one? It wouldn't be a bad idea to have one, even though I hope you won't be begging me to stop. Mine, in case I need to use it, is Titan." He stands up, his pants stretching across his hard cock, and reaches a hand down to Ben.
"Safe words? Yeah, I've heard about them. Although I can't see me needing it tonight, I always thought I'd go with something simple since I tend to get pretty mindless during sex." he admits as he takes John's hand and stands up. "The book I read first suggested going with red since we tend to associate it with stopping."
He bites into his lower lip a little nervously. "Anything else we need to cover before you fuck me?"
"Sounds good for now, we'll revisit it later if needed," John nods. "And mindless is a really good way to be during sex," he adds. "I'm going to enjoy seeing you that way... and no, we've covered everything. Come upstairs with me, Ben." He leads him through the house, as quickly as he can. Ben doesn't seem to mind that.
Ben definitely doesn't mind the quickness or being led. He takes a moment to enjoy watching John moving directly in front of him before he forces himself to pay attention to house around him in an effort to keep from going after John now and having them end up on a couch instead of a comfortable bed. Until they reached the bedroom or wherever they were headed, at least Ben had a very enjoyable view directly in front of him.
It seems to take longer to get to the stairs, but John knows it's just because he wants this part to be done. He's looking back and smiling at Ben, then he turns, leading Ben up the stairs, then to his bedroom at last. He can't help it, once the door closes, he pushes Ben against it, unable to resist touching him any longer. He presses Ben into the door, thrusting against him, kissing him deeply, softly biting his lip.
What a reward for patience, Ben thinks, sliding his hands around and burying one of them in John's hair. His tongue immediately starts exploring, tracing over John's teeth and then beyond. His free hand is sliding down and enjoying the feel of contact even if there is a layer of shirt between them. As soon as his free hand reaches the waistband of John's pants though, Ben begins working to get the shirt pulled up enough to erase any barrier between his hand and the skin he so wants to touch.
"You know," John murmurs softly against Ben's skin. "I never have liked formal wear..." He's struggling as much with Ben's clothes as Ben is with his. "Even if you do look absolutely edible in it." He nips Ben's ear lightly, as he rubs Ben's cock through his pants.
"Fuck." he presses into John's hand with a low moan. "Just want it all off, want to touch you." He reluctantly slides his hand out of John's hair and decides in a brief moment of clarity that he needs to start with the buttons on the shirt or getting off the jacket. If he starts with the pants there's no way he'll make it back to the shirt before he gets distracted. "Why couldn't we have met at a nude beach or something." he mutters as he pushes off the other's jacket while trying not to take too many detours to explore.
John laughs. "I'll take you one day," he promises. "But yes. I know what you mean..." He wants to encourage Ben's explorations but then that would mean... so he doesn't, he helps Ben and it's going okay. Really okay. He wishes for a moment that they wouldn't need to use condoms, but he knows better than that. So instead he licks down Ben's chest, following the path of the open shirt. "Mmmm," he hums against him. He knows he's being distracting but he has a bit of a problem caring about that right now.
The mouth on his chest is definitely a distraction, but somehow Ben manages to get John's jacket and shirt off. The problem then lies in getting off the other's pants without dislodging the mouth he's enjoying a lot. He manages the button and zipper before getting distracted himself after sliding his hand down inside to find what he really wants. "You feel so amazing. Can't get enough of you."
"God, Ben!" John cries out at the first touch, then he bites, harder than he'd intended. He licks it to soothe the pain, while he's... getting incredibly turned on just by Ben's hand on him. "Ben..." he whispers again. "Do you know what you do to me? Do you know how much I want you?"
He groans at the harder bite, turned on even more by the pain and just having John here. "Hopefully I do something close to what you do to me." he manages to say before pushing into another kiss. "Show me how much you want me." he whispers into the kiss. "I want you so much."
John grins, giving a little twist of his hips, and as he'd planned, his pants fall right off. "You asked me to show you?" he grins. "I don't pull that particular little trick out for just anyone...in fact, only the person who taught it to me and you..." he kicks off the pants and shoes and stands, naked, regretting only that he's had to stop touching Ben briefly. His hands move toward Ben's belt.
Ben stands shocked for a moment after the move, his eyes naturally drawn to all the wonderful bare skin. As soon as John is close enough again, Ben reaches down and encircles him again. It's still not enough contact for him though and so he lowers his head and starts exploring John's neck and shoulders with his mouth and just the slightest amount of teeth. "You're so amazingly sexy." he says against John's skin.
"You think so?" John teases, pushing Ben's pants down. "I think you're... oh, fuck, that's...yeah, there... pretty sexy too..." he arches his neck for Ben's teeth. "You know, there's a nice big bed, just a few feet across the room," he says, hands moving over Ben's skin.
Ben licks the spot on John's neck again before biting a little bit harder. He really does love teeth a lot, biting and being bit and it shows. "Bed would be good." he agrees but doesn't stop his exploration with his mouth or his hands. If anything, he increases his focus on the task in front of him.
While it is tempting to stay here, very tempting when Ben bites him again, John thinks now might be a very good time to assert himself a little. "Bed. Now." he says, and moves out of Ben's reach. "Trust me, it'll be more comfortable." He walks the few feet, feeling Ben's eyes on him as he pulls the covers down. "Get over here, Ben."
Responding to the commanding tone and the fact what he wants is by the bed, Ben moves quickly. What is a little surprising to him is that when he gets there he doesn't immediately start off where he was interrupted. Instead, he stands about a foot for John and waits to see what he wants now.
"Come closer," John says. "I want to see you lying across my bed. I can't promise this will be slow," he says. "I'd like to, and I won't hurt you, but I need... I want you so much, Ben. I want to feel you around me, I want to be so deep inside you that I feel like I'm a part of you." He moves to the bedstand for condoms and lube, but before he does, he whispers. "I want to see you across my bed when I turn around, Ben."
"It doesn't have to be slow." he says softly as he moves slowly closer. Only when he hears the command in the whisper does he hurry his movements more. Within a second he's on the bed but quickly realizes he doesn't know exactly how John wants him. "Um . . ." he says a little bit nervously, not wanting to mess this up before it's even really begun. ". . .how exactly do you want me on the bed?"
"I have to remember how long it is since I've really done this," John answers. "On your back, Ben. I want to be able to see you." He waits a moment, giving Ben the chance to get settled, before turning to see him. "Oh, that's perfect," John says. "You're... gorgeous." It's the only word to describe Ben.
He blushes. Actually blushes which embarrasses him more and causes his face to flush even more. He looks to the side as he tries to regain at least a little bit of composure. "Thanks." he says in a whisper that is barely audible. He wants to be that guy who is confident in how he looks and doesn't get flustered with compliments, but he knows that will probably never be the person he is so he tries to fake it as much as he can and get through the moments when it becomes apparent that he isn't sure of himself.
He's even more beautiful when he blushes, but John knows better than to say that aloud. He wonders why Ben seems to have so much trouble accepting simple compliments, but that's a question for another time, another place. He joins Ben on the bed, kissing him again. "I could just kiss you all night," he murmurs into Ben's mouth. "Kiss you until we both come, all over each other."
"I'm not sure I'd complain about that." he says with a smile, relieved John didn't push for an explanation of why he had problems with compliments. "Although the idea of having you buried deep inside of me is certainly appealing as well. In the end though, I guess it's up to you how you'd like to come. I'd like to add another option for your enjoyment though -- you could always try it buried deep in my mouth if my ass isn't appealing enough."
"If I were up for it, I'd go for all three," John answers, biting Ben's neck, not quite enough to leave a mark. "But once is about my limit right now. Still, soon... this is going to happen again, you know. Again and again and again if I have anything to say about it. And how could you think your ass is unappealing?" he looks at Ben, shaking his head. "You have an incredible ass. And an incredible mouth. Both of which I fully intend to explore at my leisure." He cups Ben's ass, pulling him nearer.
"I'd like this to happen a lot more." Ben nods with a small smile. "But even once right now sounds really, really good. Once with you sounds like it would be heaven." He mentally makes note of the compliments for his ass and mouth but doesn't respond, still a little off kilter from the previous compliment and not wanting to make a big deal over any of it. "You haven't told me yet how you want to come though. I want to make you come so hard that you forget everything but the two of us and how good it feels between us."
"Yes, once, right now, does seem like an excellent idea. And I want your ass, tonight, Ben." John kisses him again. "The rest will wait." He's plastered against Ben, feeling all his skin as he kisses down to lick one of Ben's nipples, then biting it softly. He reaches for the condom and lube as he nibbles, his teeth playing with Ben's nipple.
"Oh." he gasps at the teeth playing with his nipple. He's always loved teeth but no one he's been with has done more then a brief bite here or there. To have his kink used again and again is just pushing every button including some he didn't know he had. "More ... please." he almost begs. "I want you inside of me so much."
"That's good, because I want to be inside you," John raises his head to whisper the words. As he returns to the nipping and biting, he opens the lube one-handed and slicks his fingers so he can prepare Ben. He pushes one in, slowly, feeling Ben open around him as he does. "Oh..." he says quietly, pressing in deeper.
Ben works to try to relax around the finger when the rest of him is so tight with pleasure from what John is doing. "More please." he asks even though he knows he's probably a little tight since he hasn't had a lot of practice doing this lately. Once or twice over a month ago doesn't help to loosen him after all. "So good John. Please more."
"There'll be more," John promises, moving up so he can whisper into Ben's ear. "You feel so hot, Ben, so tight and hot around me. So good..." his finger goes deeper and he moves around, searching for Ben's prostate, as he presses another finger into Ben. "How many fingers have you taken?" he asks, and that's when he finds the nub and presses, hard. It's probably not fair to ask something just before then, but John has never said he wasn't a tease in some ways.
Ben was planning on answering John, really he had every intention, but then his world seemed to turn on its axis. Suddenly everything seemed a lot less important as long as that finger continued doing exactly what it had begun. So instead of an answer to John's question, Ben let out a long and deep moan. There were probably several curses in there as well but luckily it was pretty much incomprehensible.
"I asked you a question," John says, his tone slightly serious, though honestly he'll be surprised if Ben can answer him yet. "Do you think you can answer me?" Another finger moves carefully inside Ben. "I really do need to know," he says, kissing Ben's neck. "I might give you another if you can take it..." He moves his fingers inside Ben, twisting them slightly.
He tries to speak, really he does but he's still gasping at how incredible the fingers feel. So instead of words, he presses down against the fingers trying to get more inside of him. He also tilts his head to the side giving John plenty of room to do whatever he wants to the skin being offered. Ben can only hope that John can understand the sounds he makes enough to never stop.
Laughing, John bites down, and figuring that Ben would have said not to, because even in the throes of pleasure, he would have found a way, if he didn't want another, a fourth finger moves inside Ben and stretches him more. He's not going to stop, his cock is demanding that it replace his fingers yesterday, he wants Ben so very much. He would ask Ben if he's ready, but he figures he can tell. Then he realises he can't unwrap the condom one-handed and curses himself for not doing that before. But he has to take his fingers out, slowly, one at a time. Then he moves back and rips the foil packet almost brutally, slicking his cock and rolling it down. "I'm coming, Ben," he says.
Ben was extremely happy that John continued what he started despite the fact he himself wasn't able to vocalize what he wanted. The biting and the fingers stretching him out were so incredible and he felt like he was floating until it all started to withdraw. He still wasn't quite up to talking yet, but he did try to get his point across by trying to get those fingers back in where he thought they belonged. Unfortunately, as much as he tried to get the fingers back they were gone and a whimper left his throat in protest of the fact. He heard John promising he was coming but even that didn't quite make sense when he was balancing on the edge of pleasure like this.
John moves down to kiss Ben again, lining himself up to move into him, slowly, pushing against his hole with the head of his cock. He pushes, and is in, just the head, and even through the condom Ben is so hot and he hopes he can last long enough to make this as good as everything else has been for them both. He's looking down at Ben, taking it slow, giving him a chance to get used to it. He knows if it isn't okay, Ben will let him know, so he stays silent but for the moans coming from his lips as he eases into Ben.
Ben looks into John's eyes with a mixture of awe and need. It all feels so incredibly good and intense in a way that he's not sure he's prepared for but wants just the same. "John . . ." he manages to whisper hoarsely. "Please." He slides his hands slowly up until he can hold onto John's shoulders for the anchor he needs to reality. "More. Good. Not going to last." He hopes he's making at least enough sense so John is aware he's okay and enjoying this more then he thought possible.
He has to move, even though he feels he could stay here, inside Ben, forever. "Yes, Ben. More. Me either..." his words a jumble but the intent should come across if the words themselves don't. He moves almost out of Ben, and plunges back into him, liking the noises Ben makes when he does. "God, so good, want you, need you," John mutters senselessly.
Ben is definitely not quiet as he feels John almost leaving him completely before plunging back inside. His hands on John's shoulders dig in with the slight edge of pain that is mixed with so much pleasure. He fights to tighten around John as he withdraws, wanting nothing more then to keep him inside of him forever. He can only hope his whimpers and moans are enough to convince John of it.
"God, Ben," John moans, thrusting shallowly, wanting to be inside Ben for as long as possible. He knows this is coming to an end, more quickly than he'd really like it to, but the slow movements seem to stretch it out a bit. "Getting, oh... close..." He wraps a hand around Ben's cock, stroking slowly. "So good, your cock in my hand..." He rubs the head of his cock over Ben's prostate, over and over.
His ass tightens around John's cock with pleasure at the dual stimulation. He's gasping for air a little from what they're doing. Somehow despite the ever-increasing pleasure he feels he manages to hold onto a slight bit of his control. "You're so sexy like this." he says as he gazes at John. "I don't know how long I can hold on."
"Then don't," John manages to say. "Come for me, Ben." He's still moving, slowly, but increasing his speed slightly, feeling his orgasm rise inside him. "I want to see you come, I want to know I did that," John finds the words, though they sound a little harsh through his heavy breathing. "I want to see you lose it for me, Ben."
He was barely hanging on to his control and being given permission to come is all it takes to snap that fragile control. Ben feels a couple more thrusts pushing into him before everything seems to explode. His ass tightens with the power of his release as does the rest of his body. With his head tilted back in pleasure, Ben moans low in his throat. He tries to keep his eyes open wanting to see John coming. "Please." he pleads. "Let go for me."
He's only been waiting for Ben to come first, and with Ben's plea, John does let go, his cock stiffening even more, impossibly he thinks, then he comes, his cock buried as far inside Ben as it will go, only the condom between them. He knows he wants it to be without a barrier one day. He throws his head back and a long moan comes from him, before he collapses forward onto Ben, still inside him though he's softening now.
Once he's recovered a little bit more, Ben slides his arms around John to hold him close, wanting the reassurance that it wasn't all just a dream that skin on skin contact could give. "Wow." he whispers as he nuzzles his face into John's neck until he's as wrapped around and in John as he can possibly get.
"Yes, wow," John agrees, liking the feeling of their skin taught. "My god, Ben..." he's in pleasure shock, still, it wasn't just good sex - he's had that before. There's more here, hidden for now, but he knows it's here. "That was..." he doesn't even have the words to say.
"Mmmm." Ben hums in a sort of agreement against John's neck. He's firmly entwined and has no immediate plans to move until absolutely necessary. He can't remember the last time he felt this comfortable and at peace. He knew it was ridiculous considering they just met, but there was definitely something there between them that he wanted the chance to explore if possible. So until John forced him away or another need became pressing, he was going to soak up the feel of bare skin sliding against bare skin and the slight burn of being stretched around John's cock.
"You're staying," John says, not even a question. "I'm too tired to get up and make a call for a cab and I don't want to let you go." He will let him go if Ben really wants to go, but he has the feeling he doesn't. He stops talking and just holds Ben. It's enough. More than enough. He could do this forever too. He realises that word keeps coming up, but it doesn't bother him at all. Not like this, not with Ben. And that feeling of "Ben" is at once new and familiar. He smiles against Ben's hair.
"Of course." he nods slightly in agreement. He doesn't want to leave, certainly not to get in a cab that would take him back to another hotel room. What he considered several hours ago to be an incredible existence filled with travel and art now seemed empty when he compared it to what he just experienced or even how it felt to just be held as if he was something to cherish and protect.
"I want to wake up holding you," John says. "I want to know what you look like when you sleep..." he cuts himself off, a moan escaping as his cock softens enough to slip out of Ben. "Just a second," he murmurs, reaching to slip the condom off his cock and tie it. He throws it carelessly into the wastebasket beside the bed and comes back to Ben in a matter of a few seconds. "I don't think I want to let you go tonight..." or ever, but he doesn't know if he should say that. Even with how it is, it might not be right yet. He just doesn't know.
For the couple of seconds John releases him to throw away the condom Ben feels bereft. It's only once he's back in the warmth of John's arms that he relaxes again. "Please don't let go." he whispers. He knows that he is giving a lot away about how important this was to him but figures out it's worth the risk to him. John needs to know that this was more then just sexual gratification to him although that part was incredible. It's the connection Ben feels growing between the two of them that is what Ben wants to encourage and hold onto.
"I won't let you go," John promises as he tightens his hold on Ben. He's so tired, but he wants to assure Ben, let him know. "I'll hold you all night and I'll even cook breakfast," he smiles. "How does that sound?" He's trying to stifle a yawn, but not doing very well at it. "Sorry," he apologises.
"Don't apologize." he says softly. While he's not yawning, he feels completely exhausted and the idea of just going to sleep wrapped up like this is suddenly all he wants. He places the softest of kisses on the skin he's nuzzled into and whispers again. "Go to sleep and we'll figure everything out tomorrow. Good night John. Sleep well."
"Tomorrow," John murmurs, eyes drifting closed, arms wrapping tighter around Ben. "Together..." he whispers. "Good night, Ben, and thank you." He's asleep a moment later.
