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Subject:Annual Birthday Music Offering
Time:10:45 am
So, my birthday is this Sunday. In the interest of making sure people see this post, and because I am going to be drinking most of the night, I am opening up my yearly music offer now.

My playlist which does not include these OST(s) in my possession: Metropolis, Samurai Champloo, Cowboy Bebop, Big O, Gundam Singles, Brain Powered, Windaria, Wolf's Rain, Spirited Away, GitS S.A.C., Lensman, .hack//SIGN, Princess Mononoke, Studio Ghibli's THE BEST (mostly Ghibli movie theme songs), Arion, Galaxy Express 999, and various anime theme tracks.

I strongly suggest using the Find function - it's 5275 tracks long, and some of them are duplicates. If you're looking for something specific, ask - I may have it, but it's not listed. I will host/MU .zips of requested files.
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Subject:Because I feel this post is very germaine to recent wanks
Time:01:31 am
Title: Dazzled By Love
Fandom: (In)Famous Vampire Authors
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 748

“Well, would I retain my virginity if it was psychic?”
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Subject:A walking cellphone ?!?
Time:04:41 pm
I love my new icon.

That is all.

EDIT: Okay, no it's not because Keitai Sousakan 7 is hardcore awesome with a dash of literal too-cool-for-school. *writes love letters to Takahashi Miike*
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Time:11:48 am
So, my Iron Man review will not exactly be everyone else's. Mainly because I went with a group of people who had just finished watching Gurren Lagaan.

Needs moar drills! )

Yes, we totally spent the entirety of Iron Man going, "All you need is a bigger drill!"
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Time:12:02 am
What do I do to unwind when I've had a bad day? (Go go skirting with another panic attack in a week.)

Parody awful fanfic. I'm pretty sure most can guess the "author" I'm imitating. (Hint: She's the star of most of my badfic posts). Bruce/Clark, fucking on dinosaurs kink.

Bruce’s head thrown back with a dying capybara’s moan, struck with the poacher’s bullet of love, willingly giving his life to this masterful hunter. )

However, today was offset by getting the internship with Audacia Ray, which is pretty much monumental for me, so. Fuck you Dr. Keller and your insinuation that I am clearly lazy and I am not trying to, y'know, balance an pretty hectic life.
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Time:06:08 pm
Current Mood:triumphant
I FART GODDAMN MIRACLES AND PUPPIES OF JOY. IN KITTEN UNITS.
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Time:08:30 pm
MST of NC-17 Joker/Batman. Joker is a woobie of misunderstood love! )
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Subject:Judged by parents and the public...The Fingers pointed at them...Well I'll point mine right back...
Time:12:04 pm
Because LJ's posting servers are down...

Picked this up from Box Turtle Bulletin; they speak with an Ex-Gay Watch representative, and it's well worth listening to. I literally cannot speak, I'm so offended.

Not suggested reading unless you want to get your rage on. Government lobbying organization uses the term shemale to describe transgender/genderqueer people. )
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Time:11:59 pm
This comment is pure love. It's even more love when it's in film form.
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Current Music:Joe Walsh - The Confessor
Subject:Shamless Fic MST
Time:11:15 pm
Current Mood:Contrite
This is mainly to make up to Kat, because I'm very talented at being oblivious and an asshole.

Cliche Fic 5: Sex Pollen )

Cliche 6: Hooker )

Cliche 7: Mpreg )
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Time:10:31 pm
Sometimes, an MST is required. )
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Subject:I think this is the part where I make a cliche Hulk anger joke.
Time:12:13 am
So, I've been considering reading the Midnighter/Grifter mini on the strength of the cover, which is fabulous. I was going to tolerate the Chuck Dixon because hey, sometimes you can't always win every battle, but now...

Oh, hell. Will someone just shove a vodka-doused sock in Chuck Dixon's mouth and light it, please?

This is the part where I say irritated, mean things about Chuck Dixon. )
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Current Music:Soul Asylum - Twiddly Dee
Subject:Ain't worried about the dumb things I've done...
Time:11:04 am
Some random babbling on the distractions.

How does one solve a bout of self-pity and bad night at work?

With tandoori chicken, long grain saffron rice, spiced black chai, dark chocolate with marzipan, and spending money one really doesn't need to. However, the new sheets are nice, I do now own a proper sake set, and...

Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane is, quite possibly, one of the cutest things I've ever seen, besides puppies. I can't pet and snuggle a book as well as a puppy, unfortunately. The high school angst-drama factor is through the roof, but I just can't help but love MJ's earnestness and Peter's passive-aggressive tendencies. Seriously, showing up as plain Peter when MJ is going to go out with Spider-Man? Way to set yourself up to fall. SMLMJ is the comic book analog of that sappy "popular one hooks up with dork" movie you'd never admit to liking, but still watch on occasion when you may catch playing on television.

Also bringing the cute, high school drama is Kamen Rider Hibiki. Despite how the fandom wants to paint it, Hibiki is the best-acted, most emotionally honest KR series made in recent memory. Tendou may have memorized every word out of his Grandmother's mouth, but he's a crappy concept played by a bad actor. (Me, sick of hearing about how he's so amazing? Nah...) Admittedly, I've been trying to share the gospel of Hibiki with those who would rather slap me than hear about it anymore.

Wherein I bitch about why toku fandom drives me crazy. )

Now, to see if I can resist really breaking the bank at Kentuck. I've been tempted every year, and this one I very likely won't have anyone with me to remind me to be sensible or responsible. Fall is my second favorite time of year, and Kentuck is how I really get into the season, browsing the art and being awed by some of the raw skill on display. And they do bring some serious skill, along with some not-so skilled.

In reality, though, it's all about the alligator and fried twinkies. And the Silver Age GA vibrator jokes.
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Current Music:Parliment Funkadelic - Atomic Dog
Time:11:41 am
Disclaimer: I don’t regularly read Ultimate Fantastic Four/Ultimate Power. These scans are credit to [info]consummated, who posted them at [info]scans_daily.

I have a highly flexible sense of humor, which loves the absurd, unusual, and absolutely terrible. I am a b-movie collector, a purveyor of crap in all forms. This tends to annoy other folks, understandably; I got a great laugh out of the Super-Skrull “stretching” Reed, when all that got stretched was my tolerance for Land’s art and a photo of someone yelling.

Upon wasting the time viewing this utterly ridiculous piece of Land porn glory, though, I simply could not laugh off.

Realism is for sissies. )

Of course, this is Greg Land. The last realistic woman he drew was his mother in first grade, and even then she had pornface.
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Time:02:05 am
This just pounced on me while brushing my teeth and I couldn't stop it. This scene is actually one of the very last scenes. By this point it's only Hermine and one other person left, who is, of course, the first Agent she encountered. Most of it really needs context, but the most I can give is that they both meet at the ruins of a rest stop and talk; he's taken on the guise of James Dean.

Admittedly, a lot of it is what I love to write for long pieces: lots of unnatural, humorous back and forth with revealing passages and not actually discussing an issue. Also, since DOTH is a huge amount of meta on the idea of the hero, what it means, and how one chooses to use it, along with the idea of being trapped in mortal godhood his speech really sums up the final point I want to get across, that every person she meets exists on this plane that is outside the normal experience, and they have to in order to do what they do: ensuring universal peace exists at all costs while acting as the god of their planet along with the Representative.

---

“I really don’t know. It’s been long, but good.” She said the statement simply, with a shrug. “I mean, there was sex. Alien sex.” )
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Subject:You will jog for the master race...And always wear the happy face...
Time:12:12 am
Current Mood:*thud*
So…it's been about a year and a half since I did a good, solid MST. Then again, I haven’t had material so willing to slap me in the face with a fish and leave its stench behind, material that begged like a wholy inappropriate sexual metaphor. Source remaining nameless at the moment.

Assbaby: Always a good choice )
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Time:11:04 pm
First, as promised.

Tim Drake on a teddy bear, no context. )

Mainly, though...this fabulous Greg Land piece is making me want to punch babies when I should be reading Journalism. Excuse me, but my spine? Not made out of silly putty. I might 'come hither' for Strawberry Shortcake, if only to give her the number for a detox institute. Dinah!Rainbow Brite next to the Ulti!Sue!She-Ra just add to the total lack of sexiness.
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Current Music:The Academy Is... - Black Mamba (Teddybears Remix)
Subject:Venom in their eyes!
Time:12:18 am
Current Mood:*drool*
I'll say: I don't like horror movies. I've seen American Werewolf in London. That's as horrifying as I get. However!

Spoilers On A LJ-Cut! )

Remember, kids, don't talk like Samuel L. Jackson or Mom'll have to wash your mouth out with some SoaP.
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Current Music:Nujabes + fat jon - how you feel
Time:10:33 pm
Huh, I thought I had posted this over here, but looks like I didn't...

This was a comment to an OTF_Wank post, but I like it so much I was a whore and copied it to my LJ. So to the JF it goes!

I despise chick-lit. It's just the Wal-Mart romance novel no one actually admits to buying, but with a cover some graphic designer trained in the fine art of vectors and cliche instead of a Fabio reject with pecs that sweat unnaturally.

So here you are. Chick-lit back blurbs, Mad-Libs style!

Imagine your mother ________ (verb) to _______ (verb) a ______ (item) than ________ (descriptor).

When single-again ____________ (job)_________ ______ (name) announces ___________ __________ ________ ________ (divisive statement), ______ (age) divorcee _________ ______ (name) wishes she could trade her ______ (noun) in for a ______ (adverb) ________ (adjective) ________ (noun).

With only _____ (number that is impossibly short) weeks of left, _____ (name) is happy to try __________ (solution to problem) and starts __________ (solution to problem), a ______ (adverb) ________ (adjective) ________ (noun), ________ _________ _______ (divisive issue).

Her _______ (noun) hot on her __________ (adjective) heels, _______ (cute adjective for job) _______ (noun) breaks all the rules and _______ (verb) _____ __ _________(prepositional phrase). Guilty about _______ ________ ____ __________ (verb phrase), there's a ______ (adverb) _______ (adjective) ______ (noun) in store for ______ (noun) . . .

______ (noun) and ________ (noun) had _______ (adverb) ________ (adjective). Now they're about to ______ __________ (prepositional phrase). Forget about _______ (adjective) ______ (noun), welcome to the _______ (adjective) ______ (noun).

Bite me, publishing industry.
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Current Music:Cee-Lo Green - Ophidiophobia
Subject:Times are strange...We got a free upgrade for snakes on a plane!
Time:11:45 am
Current Mood:Fan-Fucking-tastic
Just really random musing on stuff.

Snakes On A Plane soundtrack is officially a huge bundle of cheesy remix love. As someone whose taste can by summed up as "is it listenable and not Nashville country or gangsta rap," I knew there was no way I could skip out on SoaP, and I am in utter love. While it is mostly remixes, each one is a little bundle of mindless fun with a great beat; even if one has more restrictive tastes, there's at least one song on the soundtrack he or she will be rocking to. Having never heard of Gym Class Heroes before, after "New Friend Request" I'll give them a try; they seem very akin to McChris, and more McChris is always good. Even if one is more exclusive in what they allow to get permanently implanted in their brain when they really need to remember the formula for sines, The soundtrack is still worth it for the random quotes, including the snakes with a MILF fascination and the classic "I dunno how I can say this, but is there anyone here who knows how to fly a plane?"

Finally got off my butt and finished Sh15uya (Shibuya 15). Overall, for a low budget series adapted from a manga, it was really pretty good. Not as much of a surprise as I'd expected, the end still satisfied and, more importantly, made sense. While a bit off-putting at first to see a female cast as the lead male, she really filled out the role admirably. Reading HJU's interview with Mark Musashi helped to shed a bit of light on the direction choices for the series; I was also amused to note that Mishicorp has indeed missubbed Piece as Peace, thus explaining the point of the "final version" of Piece and why each incarnation had a different symbol on his chest.

I am a sad human, however. The entire series I kept thinking, "Wow, if you cosplay Piece your f-ed up wig would be fine." (I seriously don't think they ever even bothered to make it look like anything besides a disused mop.) Plus, Piece really is a ridiculously easy yet recognizable cosplay.

Now, back to making this journal a series of nothing but pretentious sci-fi that tries too had to be funny.
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[icon] For Madmen Only!
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