So today marks the 20th aniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall. What this means for me is that I've been alternatively blubbering and feeling really old whenever I watch the news, which is usually three to four times a day, sigh.

I have a very vivid memory of watching the wall fall, live on the news. It wasn't the first time I became aware that the world was bigger than, like, my immediate family (that was Chernobyl, which I don't recall seeing on the news, but I do remember my mum and gran talking about the potential fallout), but it was the first time I felt actually connected to current events. It's also one of the few really vivid memories I have from before I was about ten -- I can still easily recall sitting crosslegged on the floor in front of the couch, watching the telly.

(I actually spent years convinced this had to be an inaccurate memory, because the wall fell around 10 PM, which was way past my bed time, surely? Except it was a Thursday, so I would've been up late to watch Dallas anyway, and my parents confirmed that they'd have let me stay up to watch something this historical if I wanted to.)And then I became a news junkie in the worst way for the next decade or so, until 9/11 somewhat overdosed me on it and the subsequent Bush shenanigans forced me to put myself on a restricted news diet for a while, sigh.

But to return to my orginal point: Yaye 20th anniversary of the fall of the Wall! Excuse me while I go be easily manipulated and blubber some more.

Dear Television Advertising,

Why was John Lydon trying to sell me butter last night? I mean, I'm not one to get all "OMG SELLOUT!", because whatever, but ... butter? What? My flabber is officially gasted, here, people. o_O

Also, what the shit is this? Are you serious?

Now I'm boggled and despairing for humanity. Thanks a lot, douchebags.

Going back to her NaNovel,
Melle

Title: When Zombies Attack: A Dark Comedy In Three Acts
Author: Sofie K Werkers
Fandom: ThatGuyWithTheGlasses.com/cinemassacre.com
Pairings: Many, both explicit and implied.
Warnings et. al.: Some death. Also, zombies!

Summary: The Mad Scientist community cordially invites you to attend the Zombie Apocalypse.
Date: 1 August 2009, 2 September 2009 - 24 September 2009
Wordcount: 20,150
Archive: Please ask.
Email: femgeek@gmail.com
Feedback: If you like this story, please let me know. If you don't, please let me know why not.

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters in this story; they belong to their creators/actors/whatever at thatguywiththeglasses.com and cinemassacre.com. Also, none of this actually happened (as should be obvious to you since I assume you’re not currently hiding from the slavering zombie hordes, and if you are, don’t you have better things to do than read fanfic?), and none of it is intended to be taken overly serious.

In other words, if you’re reading this and getting angry at the very concept of fanfic about internet personalities, just close the tab, move on, and repeat to yourself: "It’s just a story, I should really just relax."

Dedication: To Amy, for beta services and putting up with my flailing panic about this damn story.

Overture: Back To The Future
Act One: One Year Later
Intermission: Strange Things Afoot At The Circle K
Act Two: Welcome To The Special Hell
Intermission: Do Not Feed After Midnight
Act Three: Don't Look Back
Epilogue: Round Up The Usual Suspects

I HAS A FLAT!!!!1!one!!

THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE WORLD RIGHT NOW, PEOPLE! \o/ regular access to a computer -- my computer! Quite possibly proper internet access again! Not to mention all my stuff! I could cry right now, honestly.

The one downside -- well, okay, there's a couple, like that everything including cooker and heating is electric, but whatever. The one thing that currently makes me flail is that I'd be moding in during the second half of November, so right during NaNo crunch time. Because I wasn't already flailing hard enough about NaNo, obviously.

But: FLAT! \o/

... Excuse me while I go and make lists of things I need to do and get and fill out before then, argh.

So after like a week of trying dozens of shops from various PoundSavers to expensive little boutique stationery shops with no result other than some strange looks when I asked for refill pads without a margin ¹, I finally found what I was looking for ... at Tesco's. Where I go get food pretty much every day, and where it apparently never occurred to me until last night to look for a refill pad.

I think God might be fucking with me again. *eyes the sky warily*

^{1 Because apparently I'm the only person in the world neurotic enough to resent it when the paper tries to tell me how wide or narrow a margin should be, or indeed that I should have one at all. Okay, so I am weird about this, a bit, but dammit, I'm a writer, we're allowed to be weird and neurotic! Hell, I use index cards, even, which definitely puts me in the "weird and neurotic, possible loony" bin.}

Today in pre-NaNo panicking: my writing brain is apparently in a handwriting mood, which is fine as far as I'm concerned, but I don't have enough writing paper left for 50,000 words, and I cannot for the life of me find writing paper without a bloody margin in this country. Hell, it was difficult enough to find it in Belgium, anymore. Augh!

And yes, dammit, I am that picky about my writing implements and accessories. I've been using the same fountain pen for over eight years even though the wood on the handle is starting to crack, because I can't find one that fits my hand as well, and ideally would have a wood handle as well, or at least not a metal one.

*goes to flail at edinburgers and Google about conundrum*

... And while I'm flailing, I should probably go and make sure I'm registered for this year, shouldn't I? (If I'm not back in two days, send help. The NaNo boards have a tendency to be second only to TV Tropes when it comes to sucking one in for days and countless open tabs. Sob.)

I'm still wavering a little about what to write, as well. Probably self-indulgent fantasy fluff, because that was how I won the one time I actually finished NaNo, but there's a couple of other ideas floating around my brain that I'm poking at to see if they want to go anywhere. Watch this space for further updates, I guess?

So after, um, several years of vague hip trouble, I finally went to the doctor about it, and now I have a referral for an X-Ray (just in case) and physiotherapy. Official description of the problem, as written by the doctor on the form: "Bilateral clicking hip trouble". (What, I don't even warrant some gratuitous Latin? Pft! Doctors these days, honestly.) I also got a mole check, which was all clear, yaye!

... And then I (slightly) sprained what I presume to me my gluteus maximus. That's right, people, I sprained my arse. Because I'm just that special. *facepalm*

Today in Melle's Hair Experiments: French braid! Because I was too busy last night to do the rag curls. The braid part is doing okay, bu the tucked-in bit is looking/feeling a bit suspicious. Hrm.

Today in the Zombie Apocalypse: First draft is FINISHED! \o/ Word count comes in at just over 20k for this draft. (... That's almost half a NaNovel, dear god.) Next up: editing, and then it goes off to beta tonight.

So with my hair now officially well past my shoulders, I decided it was time for a little experiment with rag curls. I think I need to put them in earlier in the evening so my hair's completey dry by morning, and I should probably put in more rags with smaller chunks of hair, especially near my neck, but overll, I'm declaring this experiment a qualified success.

(Yes, Anna, there will be pictures as soon as I can, once I've tweaked it to my satisfaction. :D )

It still feels really weird, though, but that's probably just because my hair's not been this long since was, like, fifteen, and this is the first time I've had my hair actually loose -- I've been putting it in a pony tail since it was long enough, and even before that I tied it up to avoid any resemblance to a mullet. I'm sure I'll get used to the feeling of having OMGhair, though. (It feels so girly, OMG!)

(Other things about having OMGhair I'll have to get used to: having to adjust it when turning over in bed to avoid getting a face ful of hair, and finding long hairs everywhere, my god but I forgot how much I shed. D: And of course, as mentioned above, I'd forgotten exactly how long my hair can take to freaking dry, so now I'm trying to readjust to keeping it dry during my morning shower so I don't end up with a head cold. Sigh.)

Okay, I need some help from the gamers out there. That's video games, by the way, and preferably more recent ones than, er, the NES era.

Without going into unneeded detail, I need a game title/reference/quote/whatever for a chapter title for this zombie apocalypse story I'm writing. This would be the chapter where the characters gear up for (and fight, kinda) the "final battle" type ... thing. It's not quite that, not some sort of Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny, but it's close enough for titling purposes.

Since my development as a (console) gamer is stuck in aforementioned NES era, I'm having to rely on google and wikipedia to help me out, and my google/wiki-fu is failing me. So far, the best title I've come up with is Don't Look back, which is ... meh.Suggestions? Anyone? Bueller? Anything? D:

And now, in Concepts That Make Me Lose Faith In Humanity: Skinny Water. I cannot even, people. *throws hands up in despair* It's water. Water! For the love of god! The diet industry has now officially jumped the fucking shark.

Excuse me, I'm going to go back to writing. The zombie apocalypse is less depressing than this shit.

To: Auntie Beeb
From: Melle
Re: Being Human

Dude. Dude. Way to serve up the OTP up to me on a silver platter, with a generous side dish of OT3. I mean, really. Wow. I've only seen one episode and this is approaching Guy/Alan levels already.

Well done!

Love,
Melle

Since Anna is off having fun in Montreal and left me all by my lonesome with no one to bounce rants off off, I'm afraid it's time for the rest of you to step up to the plate and listen to my rants on Sexism On TV.

So, here's a little thought exercise. Imagine you're a police type person, and you're investigating a case that involves a guy being stabbed to death while handcuffed to a hotel bed and a woman found sleeping next to him with no idea what happened. She tests positive for GHB.

(Note: for the purposes of this show exercise, we're apparently assuming GHB knocks you out seconds after taking it. I know, I know: GHB Doesn't Work That Way, as far as I know, but we'll go with it, because this is seriously the least problematic point in this entire scenario.)

In the course of the investigation, you somehow (I had a hard time paying attention to the actual plot through the red haze of anger) find a) another woman this bloke picked up, and b) evidence that at least some of the women weren't drugged before they went up to his room, at least. So you interview this other woman, and she tells you what happens: she met the bloke in a bar, she went up to his room with him, voluntarily, he gave her a vial of what he claimed was absinthe, and then it's heavily implied the next thing she remembers is waking up and finding her money and jewelry stolen. She ends her statement with, "I cheated on my husband, but that's not a crime, is it?"

Pop Quiz! What do you do/say?

a) You make some noncommittal noises, or acknowledge that no, it's not a crime. You then thank her for her time, finish the interview, and continue trying to find who killed this guy.

b) You try to gently point out that whether or not she voluntarily went to his room doesn't really matter, because the moment he took away her ability to consent (or withdraw consent) by drugging her, any sexual contact he had with her would be rape, although it would've been difficult to prosecute. You then give her contact details for a rape counsellor or similar, finish the interview, and continue trying to find who killed this guy.

c) You gravely intone, "Not yet," and then just ... stand there.

Click me, I'm rage-filled!

LIEFEEEEEEEEEEELD!

Everyone: "OMG THE INTERNET^* IS DOWN!"
Melle: *has noticed nothing, as was off swimming*

^* For values of "the internet" that mean "LJ, twitter and Facebook".

Clearly, this proves I should not be allowed to have a life. Or something.

Offered without comment:

Who is going to want to see Downey Jr. and Law make out? I don't think it would be appealing to women.
- Former Post movie critic Michael Medved, re: rumours that there's a fair bit of subtext in the new Sherlock Holmes movie.

• Things I Do Not Like On a Sunday Morning: Waking up at ass o' clock 6AM and being unable to go back to sleep.
• Things I Really Do Not Like On a Sunday Morning, Especially at Ass O' Clock 6AM: Turning on the telly for the early morning news and having Sarah Palin blither at me about seeing Russia from her house.
• Other Things On My TV This Weekend: Tom Felton on some game show, talking in his own accent and weirding me out by doing so. o_O
• I'm trying to finish a Firefly fic I haven't touched in nearly two years. Cover me, I'm going in.

So. Er. This is the risk of writing fic about internet personalities: sometimes, they find out. (I've yet to receive any comments myself, thankfully. BUT STILL!)

I'm oddly torn between feeling incredible calm and zen-like about the whole thing on the one hand, and giggling uncontrollably on the other. Either way, I suspect the solution here is more caffeine and pretending it never happened.

(I like how I'm locking this entry's crosspost on LJ, but my actual fic is still right there in the open.)

I can't vbelieve I wrote this. I'm not sure what's more embarassing: the fandom, the hetsmut (...ish), or how pleased I am at the number of injokes I've managed to get into the fic.

There is at least vaguely amusing wank about vanilla in one of my snark comms, and I can't post it to otf_wank because it's locked. DAMMIT!

I was meaning to post about my primary school reunion, which I went to yesterday, but I came down with a horrible cold that's trying to morph into bronchitis. Augh. OTOH, it's a good excuse to indulge in childhood cold remedies inviolving copious amounts of sugar and alcohol. Grog: the cure for what ails ya. Arrrrr!

Ohjesusgodno.

( Cut for incoherent rage and wibbling. )

Also incredibly annoyed with this bullshit -- specifically, PJ's "modding". I'd forgotten either that I was still a f_d member, or that PJ was the mod there, or possibly both, but damn, woman, take off the powercrazypants. *leaves*

So I was reading a whole mess of fic yesterday, and came across a meme that I’m going to viciously steal in an attempt to get back to writing. Because I have a block right now about writing, but that doesn’t mean I can’t tell stories, because lord, can I ever. So.

Ask me to tell you a story. Any of my fandoms, crossover, or AU will work, pretty much — like, “Tell me about that time MCR were actually all girls and Frank Iero was the hottest lesbian ever,” or “Tell me about Legolas and Gimli sailing off into the sunset together,” or “Tell me about that time Lee Jordan became Minister of Magic,” which is technically Jezz’s story, but whatever. Hit me!

(Fandoms I’m in/have been in, for reference and in no particular order: Harry Potter, Buffy, Metallica, Guns ‘n Roses, Popslash, My Chemical Romance, Firefly, Lord of the Rings, the new BBC version of Robin Hood, (World of) Warcraft (it is too a fandom, hush), Space: Above and Beyond, assorted comic books, mostly X-Men and Cable&Deadpool, plus some Boostle, new Who, and, um, several I’m probably forgetting. And hell, I can probably tell you a non-fandom story too, if you want. Seriously, hit me!)

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

Melle: I am having some very random but intense fandom-love. Like, love for fandom at large. I do not know where this came from, but I keep wanting to write it a love letter.
Anna: DO IT!

So, yeah. Blame Canada for this:

Dear Fandom,

Hi, you probably don’t really know me, because I tend to just kind of hover around at your edges most of the time, lurking in the shadows, but after more than ten years, I figured I should actually come out and tell you how much I love you.

You’ve made my life so much better, given me so much — the ability to actually socialise, a ton of friends, language skills, EVERYTHING. I would not be the person I am today without you, so yeah. Thank you!

I hope we get at least another ten years, me in the corner and you doing your awesome thing, with your porn and your smarts and your PEOPLE who are AWESOME and your community and your wank and your LITTLE FACE! :D

I am so looking forward to growing old with you, I can’t even tell you.

Lessthanthree,
Melle

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP AAAAAAAAAAA!

AND YOUR LITTLE DOGGIE TOO!

Just yesterday I told Anna, “Hey, there’s actual funny on Fanom Wank! :D” I think I may have jinxed it. *headdesk*

I knew I should have asked for a bannination coupon for my birthday. :(

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

(Note: I know Emma Goldman didn’t actually say that exactly, but that’s not gonna stop me from using it. I like the sentiment anyway.)

I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but I think I kinda love 4-chan right now. They’ve demonstrated the organising power of the internet, and hopefully will show a whole generation that protesting and activism can be not only fun, but even damn hilarious. (In some cities, they rickrolled the Co$, people! Awesome!)

Some related links:

• Wikipedia explains 4-chan — scroll down to section 2.1 and beyond for info relevant to this whole thing.
• Wikipedia explains Project Chanology for an explanation of what went on yesterday.
• Wikinews article on yesterday’s protests.
• Photos and reports, in which, unfortunately, the words “fag” and “gay” are liberally strewn around as slurs. This would be the part of this that makes me hideously uncomfortable, yes.
• Cleo has a sampler of the above.

In conclusion: I don’t agree with everything they do or say, and again, the “fag” slurs make me not want to participate, but the effective use of the internet as an organising and focussing tool for activism? Awesome.

In conclusion:

[ETA] Via Cleo: deathboy says:

I can’t remember the source, but there’s some sci-fi story I’ve read where the conclusion reads along the lines of “They could withstand the fiercest of our weapons, they could defeat us intellectually, but in the end, I think they died of sheer culture shock” - the looks on the faces of the scientologists when faced with a crowd in which a lone voice shouts:

“I HEAR TOM CRUISE HATES MUDKIPS!”

(all) “NOOOOOOOOOOO!”

… how do you fight that?

How do you, ideologically speaking, defeat a crowd that is enthusiastically demanding that you “DO A BARREL ROLL! DO A BARREL ROLL!!” ?

Which is sort of what I was trying to get at, really. It needs balancing with actually getting one’s message across, but announcing you’re gonna protest for a specific reason will make it clear to the target/audience what they’re there for, and every protest I’ve been to has had its share of cryptic signs — the message still came through. Sure, the rickrolling and the Fresh Prince rap will confuse people, but they’ll be more likely to come and ask if thge protesters are obviously having fun. (And no, I don’t get the Fresh Prince thing either. Huh?) [/ETA]

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

Dear Frank Iero,

Please cease and desist being a FUCKING HOT LESBIAN, you fucker, and UNHAND MAH GAY!

Distressedly yours,
Melle

(Seriously, that haircut couldn’t be any dykier if it put on a strap-on and fucked your girlfriend. Frank is pretty much my Ideal of Hotness in that picture and I WANT HIM TO STOOOOP! D: )

(Oh great, just when I could’ve really used my “inappropriate lusting” tag, I’ve gone and deleted it.)

(Oh hey, while I’m up, anyone want to point me towards a good starting point for finding Ray Toro and/or Bob Bryar-centric picspam and/or fic?)

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

I should probably find a more constructive outlet for my history geek tendencies, because right now I keep thinking someone ought to make a website or a wiki about the cultural history of the internet and/or fandom so I can go and get all nostalgic about it. Something like this, only more so, and mentioning things like “Remember when Hotmail wasn’t yet owned by Microsoft?” and stuff like that.

… I kinda can’t wait to be old and crab at the Kids These Days about how I remember an internet before LOLCats and say things like “Now, back in the days when YahooGroups was still eGroups, but after OneList …” I have issues, I know.

( Read the rest of this entry » )

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

My life feels all disorganised and argh. This is, I suspect, in large part because my flat is an unholy mess. I’ve been meaning to clean this weekend, but when I switched on the boiler yesterday, it quickly became apparent that there was something wrong. Normally, even in the coldest dead of winter, it takes an hour, max, to heat the water up to near-boiling. This time? Not so much. Three hours later, it was still tepid at best — warm enough that I can tell it’s doing something, too cold to take a shower with or do the dishes. And so i should call my landlady, except I need to clean first, before she comes out, because I can’t let her see the flat like this. O HELLO CATCH-22! *headdesk*

(Okay, I’ve been clearing up at least, and dusting and stuff, and will do the dishes by boiling water in the kettle, but it’s gonna take a while, and I’ve not been able to take a shower in two days now. I normally shower twice a day, so now I feel icky like whoa.)

In happier news, Gerard Way needs to be my secret gay boyfriend. (Starting at the 0:57 mark.) No, seriously. (Around the 1:50 mark especially.)

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

• LOL80’s: A Picture Thread
  (tags: funny 80s)
• LOLRockers?
  (tags: funny lolrockers)
• the Laugh-Out-Loud Cats - a photoset on Flickr
  (tags: lolcats funny)

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

Small housekeeping note: I’m no longer posting writing-related posts to mounthelicon, nor crafts-related posts to craftybrain, because I want to uniformise (shaddup, it is too a word) the “mirrors” at all four (… for now, until GJ goes down completely) LJ-clones.

Neil Gaiman is made of awesome:

When I’m not writing the novel I feel guilty. And even though blogworthy things turn up (I could write about the thaw right now, and the sunshine and the bees; three days ago a really funny entry on what to do when your assistant hands you twenty pounds of whole and uncut cow liver for your dog that she was given at the local meat packing plant didn’t get written, and yesterday I composed an entire thing in my head I didn’t write down about Why The People in Torchwood Season One Are All Too Stupid To Live — including the astonishingly puzzling incident where someone in 1941 has written something down on paper with black ink (a medium that will last legibly for centuries if kept out of the sun), and, unaccountably worried that ink on paper will fade and become unreadable in time, first she takes a prototype Polaroid photo of it, and then writes some of it in blood and puts it in a coffee can in a damp cellar, because these media will still be readable seventy years later. Why she didn’t make a model of it out of chocolate as well, I will never know.)

Dear Mr Gaiman: Please be my BFF and come for a sleepover with Anna and I? We’ll paint our toenails and braid each other’s hair and talk about boys! It’ll be ace!

In unrelated news, I should stop looking at baby!Metallica (and baby!GnR) pictures. I have ceased believing these people were born male. I sorry, but there’s long hair, and then there’s Farrah Fawcett hair, and baby!Lars has the latter. Also, I now have a theory that Axl Rose was raised in some weird-ass commune that shunned trousers, or something, and wasn’t introduced to the very concept of them until 1992 at least. (Thong-and-chaps, kilts, tight shorts, tights-and-red-patent-leather-codpiece — anything but trousers, apparently!)

(”Why were you looking at these pictures in the first place?” I’m having a fandom relapse, okay, shaddup. DUN JUDGE MEEE!)

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

• Morphases - More Faces
  Awesome tool for creating lifelike images of characters, etc.
  (tags: resources writing)
• McA direct
  Local yarn shop.
  (tags: knitting yarn)
• Fake LJ-User Tag Generator
  Always comes in handy.
  (tags: resources)
• Chocolate Fountains warehouse
  Online shop that sells Callebaut chocolate.
  (tags: stores)

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

My internet is being patchy, so I spent most of the weekend watching TV. I now remember why I don’t usually watch much TV. Gah.

(I was also reminded of how much I want fashion to go on a Sixties retro kick so I can rock outfits like this . I have legs to show off here, and I bloody well can’t do it in what passes for a miniskirt these days!)

So, uh, yeah, still playing catch-up on blogs and friendslists, but I will get there! I promise!

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

The thing about DMs is, because they last so damn long, some time between new pairs, I always forgot how painful it is to break in a new pair. Owie. :(

Work is busy. I’m nevertheless busy playing pretty flash-based games. My favourites are Winterbells (current high score: 2,845,220) and Bubble Bees (Current high score: 9,000-odd). Warning: do not click on that link if you don’t have at least an hour to lose.

Meme time! From Munchkinott:

• Leave me a casual comment of no particular significance, like a lyric to your current favorite song, your favorite kind of sandwich, or maybe your favorite game. Any remark, meaningless or not.
• I will respond by asking you five personal questions so I can get to know you better.
• Update your LJ with the answers to the questions.
• Include this explanation and offer to ask someone else in your own post.
• When others respond with a desultory comment, you will ask them five questions.

Answers behind the cut.

( Read the rest of this entry » )

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

Happy New Year’s! Mags got me dunk. Or at least her party did. I’m going to be so emarassed in the morning. And missing my tupperware. Um. I mean. HI! :D

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

Robin Hood double length finale intant reactions — spoilers behind the cut. Warning: Incoherent rambling ahead.

( Read the rest of this entry » )

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

Am home safe, despite Belgium’s apparent efforts to kill me dead. More details later, after I’ve unpacked, cleaned, watched Robin Hood and taken a bath.

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

Independent Soul: now with 75% more CMS! :D

I’ve made a CMS for my stories and one for the quotes, which will hopefully make it a bit easier to update those, at least, and a gallery so I can keep all of my photos and stuff together instead of trying to remember if I put a certain photo on my LJ gallery, my Flickr account, or my /random folder.

And, of course, happy birthday to me. :D

This is the time of year I usually get all thinky and stuff, and this year is no different. I’ve made a bunch of plans and resolutions for the coming year, and this time, I think I will actually keep them.

Resolutions, in order of how hard you’re all allowed to smack me if I fail.

1. Get a new job by May. I’m setting myself a deadline because it’ll be the only way to stick to this.
2. Get serious about freelancing as a webdesigner.
3. Do not start smoking again.
4. Crossdress when I feel like going into boymode, and let anyone who thinks it’s weird or stupid hang.
5. Draft a budget and stick to it for at least three months in a row.

I figure, if I stick to only five of them, that should be manageable. A theoretical sixth is “Write moar,” but like I said, realistic. I’ll try, of course, but I’m not setting myself any goals anymore. :/

(On the subject of #4, my birthday/Christmas present to myself this year is going to be a compression vest/shirt. Possibly one of these — they’re in the US, but I’ve heard good things about Underworks.)

Plans for today: go out to buy Christmas presents for the fam and Lush stuff for me, come home, have a long hot bath. Mmmm. :)

Crossposted from Sleepless in Scotland. Comment here or there.

Dear internet: Please don't conk out on me like that, it scares me. O_O

If you were paying attention earlier, you may have noticed that I got the LJXP thing working for multiple journals. Oh, yes. It works, bitches. ("What?") ALL TECH WILL FEAR ME AND DESPAIR! \o/ Anyone else want the scripts, let me know. :D

... Why is Richard Mately being really catty on HIGNFY? o_O

*whacks things with sticks* Okay, So. I'm trying to convince LJ-Archive to export my entries, with comments, to XML so I can upload them to my on-site blog. It does this without complaint for mounthelicon and craftybrain, and will happily do so for bubosquared without comments, but trying to export bubosquared with comments makes it crash on July 2002. Now, granted, this is seven years worth of entries, plus comments, so maybe it's just choking on the sheer volume, but it keeps crashing on the same month, which makes me think it's something specific in that month that's causing the problem. Anyone have any ideas?

( Error/crash message. )

I have no idea why the fuck I'm awake at this hour of the morning, but I've used my time productively, at least. "Story Management System": done, up, and working. \o/

Next up: image gallery software. Preferably one that doesn't take up 80 freakin' MB. And will let me play with the layout. *grabs stick, goes hunting*

[ETA] Anyone have any ideas on what to call a freelance webdesign business> dantesvendetta suggested Minerva (or Athena) Webdesign on Wednesday, but a quick google tells me someone got there first, woe. :( [/ETA]

One day of semi-intensice coding later, I have a system that more or less does what I want it to do. W00t! \o/ I'm still finishing up the last bits and pieces (setting up a page for editing stories, checking titles across FPS/RPS/Non-fanfic tables, allowing for banner/cover uploads), and generating the title pages the way I want them is going to take a bit more work (mostly because to fully automate them, I'll have to conquer the COUNT function, which, HATE!), but at the end of the day I'll have something that will let me enter information into a form and generate a php file for the story, and then automatically generate the index pages without me having to faff about with them. Plus, it allows for slighly more complex stuff in future. \o/ I say! :D

... Oh hey, I think I managed to find a way to check for duplicates without the count function. Success! Now to tackle the image uploading.

( Linkspam of the day. )

Customer quote of the day:

Customer: "Whenever I try and open the SatNav, some writing comes up, why?"
Melle: "I don't know, Sir,that depends on what the writing is. Can you try and open the software and read me the message you get?"
Customer: "I'm calling from the phone, so it's a bit difficult to check right now."
Melle: "... Right. Do you know what the icon says that you press to open the software?" [To make sure he at least has our software. -ed.]
Customer: "No, and I can't check, because I'm calling from the phone."

And then he got snippy when I asked to call back from another phone. PEOPLE! How does that make sense? *headdesk*

And I leave you with this inspirational message, which StumbleUpon wanted me to see just now. <3

Today's plans: try and write own code for story-management system. Also, porn. *cracks knuckles*

... You'll note that it's now noon and I've yet to do either, by the way. Stupid customers. Gah.

Before I end up pulling my hair out: any CSS gurus out there want to point me towards the best way to get a footer on a multi-column page? Because Google is coughing up a bunch of ways to do it and I can't seem to find one that works at least in FireFox and AUGH!

Linkspam of the Day, because I discovered Stumbleupon:

1. WinterBells -- Beautiful flash game, and the music makes it even better.
2. VisuWords -- An online graphical dictionary. Fascinating in that way that kinda fucks with my brain. (Double-click on some of the bubbles for more fascinatingness!)
3. Foodpairing -- Not just here because it's a Belgian website, but also because this comes in very handy for people like me who like to experiment with food but don't always have this kind of thing down as common sense.
4. Low Impact Woodland Home -- a.k.a.: Hobbit House built for £4000 in four months. We wants one, preciousss ....
5. The Effects of Drugs on Spiders -- Yeah, um, that spider on caffeine? That's so totally me. *hides in shame*
6. Hang Stan -- Hangman with a pig. And with answers that are much easier to guess than random words. :D
7. Programer or Serial Killer? -- I got 3/10. I'm pretty much fucked, then, aren't I?
8. LetterFu -- This just strikes me as kinda charming and awesome. I may actually start writing letters again with this. :D
9. Guerilla Gardening -- This is just all kinds of awesome and win.
10. Things Other People Accomplished When They Were Your Age -- In case your self-esteem needs punching.

My brain has had, alternatingly, Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny and Internet People stuck in it since yesterday. I've tried everything to make it stop, but even ABBA can't make this budge. Augh. This probably says something about me, but I don't know if I want to know what, exactly. (Note: This is not an excuse to start singing Badger Badger at me, nor the Hamster Dance song or any other internet meme jingle. This is bad enough as it is.

Am trying to re-write my CV into a more functional CV, focussing on skills more than pure work experience. I'm having trouble coming up with skills. Augh. Any suggestions? Anyone?

So, um. I ... seem to have quit smoking. By power of sheer laziness, mostly, so yeah. I'm a bit wibble abouthow I'll hold up at work today, but the physical addiction seems to be pretty much gone, and the habit is less of a problem here than at home, but on the other hand, there's the stress. Ho hum.

Also, my hair is now long enough that I can start slicking it back in classic '50s butch style. As evidenced last Saturday at Sarah's party, where I dressed up as James Dean. You heard me. I kinda liked the look, but not what the gel did to my hair. Still, if I can find a (preferably wetlook) gel that won't fuck up my hair, I've found a good inbetweeny hairstyle, huzzah!

(And yeah, I know I've been sparse lately, but it's winter, and I go a bt quiet in winter. Don't worry about me, I'll be okay.)

Today is made of tummy-ache and woe. :(

And in this week's Robin Hood: ( MORE gay! )

My NaNo procastination, let me show you it ...

(What? At least it's nominally productive, and it's something for my portfolio, if nothing else.)

1. The HP Lexicon wankerage is SO ENTERTAINING people! (If you donj't know, don't ask unless you really want to know. Warning: the management is not responsible for any unboggling your brain may need. Mine is still stuck in boggled from Friday.
2. I spent half the weekend getting increasingly desperate that I'd lost my silver crucifix. Could not find it, and when I checked the Lost and Found at work this morning as a last ditch attempt, I nearly broke down when it wasn't there. I just caught a glint out of the corner of my eye while changing, and there it was, hidden and wedged between the floorboards in my bedroom. Words cannot express my relief.
3. I had a third point, but I've lost it again. DAMMIT!