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Below are the most recent 25 friends' journal entries.

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    Saturday, March 20th, 2010
    daily_snitch
    [ furiosity ]
         		12:04a
    Friday, March 19th, 2010
    deathwatch
    [ _deadleaves ]
         		1:46p
    RIP: Nujabes
    Nujabes, Underground Hip Hop Artist, Dead at 36

    Samurai Champloo would have not been the same without you.
    fandom_lounge
    [ phosfate ]
         		12:42p
    breaking news: snapefan does something creative, delightful
    http://blog.craftzine.com/archive/2010/03/professor_snape_car_seat_cover.html
    the_hms_stfu
    [ farmercuerden ]
         		4:52p
    Canon 200, #128, "Spicy"
    ETA: ...Well, just edited. Added some more jokes, tightened up some of the lines. I'm particularly pleased with the new bit beginning "Though some may see..." in the Snapefen's first chorus. I've been thinking about this for literally months, and when I finally wrote it down, I kept getting or remembering ideas. Should be done now, though. =)

    Title: All Round Hogwarts
    Author: Farmer Cuerden
    Fandom: Harry Potter
    Fic: The Snapefen edition of Harry Potter
    Prompt: #128, "Spicy". Like Snape![citation needed]
    Rating: 15: References Marionros' bizarre ideas.
    Summary: Fandom Snape tells us about himself.
    Author’s Notes:
    The song this is based on is "All Down Picadilly", from Lionel Monckton's The Arcadians one of the huge hits of the early 20th century. It's now (undeservedly) rather obscure, so here's a link to a recording of the original. It's maybe a little faster tempo than is ideal, but that's older recordings for you (they sped things up until they fit the space on the record). I'd provide a MIDI like I have with other filks, but, unfortunately, I don't own the sheet music for this one.




    1.

    FANDOM SNAPE:

    You've heard of me, of course:
    I'm fandom's latest whim.
    I've made a hit, in fact I'm it -
    Or, rather, I am him.
    The fangirls chase me round
    I've not an hour to spare
    They love the way that I atone
    And seek me out when I'm alone
    Within my dungeon lair!

    SNAPEFEN:

    Your naughty dungeon lair!

    FANDOM SNAPE:

    Detentions they all want to share
    Within my naughty dungeon lair!


    FANDOM SNAPE:

    All round Hogwarts, Hogsmeade, and where'er there's Snapey
    All round the school!
    You'll see fangirls running after me all gapey -
    They think I rule!
    Sometimes, in their fanfic I'll get rapey-rapey
    Why not? It's me! [*]
    And though they try to win and woo me;
    Astral planes use to pursue me
    They can't catch me!

    SNAPEFEN:

    All round Hogwarts, Hogsmeade, and where'er there's Snapey
    All round the school!
    You'll see all us fangirls chasing you all gapey -
    We think you rule!
    Sometimes, in our fanfic he'll get rapey-rapey
    Wish he'd rape me!
    Though some may see a mean and sick man,
    Still, he looks like Alan Rickman -
    He's our woobie!

    2.

    But all the Hogwarts crowd
    Could not see that I'm great
    And Lily Evans, mudblood,
    Wouldn't have me for her mate!
    How dare she like that James?
    Reject me - how absurd!
    And then their son dares me abuse
    Because, in response, I did choose
    Lord Voldemort to serve!

    SNAPEFEN:
    Ooh! What a shocking swerve!

    FANDOM SNAPE:
    And all you know mudbloods deserve
    What happened, and so he's some nerve!


    FANDOM SNAPE:

    All round Hogwarts, Hogsmeade, and where'er there's Snapey
    All round the school!
    You'll see fangirls running after me all gapey -
    They think I rule!
    Remus with me tried to get all rapey-rapey -
    Why can't you see!?
    If Sirius sent me to Remus
    It was for some werewolf penis
    Monstrous is he!     [**]

    SNAPEFEN:
    All round Hogwarts, Hogsmeade, and where'er there's Snapey
    All round the school!
    You'll see all us fangirls chasing you all gapey -
    We think you rule!
    Remus with him tried to get all rapey-rapey
    We clearly see!
    When Sirius sent him to Remus
    It was for some werewolf penis
    Monsters they be!



    [*] And, as every fangirl knows, rape is love when the man's hot.

    [**] Poor people are never hot. Anyone worthwhile in a story will be rich and powerful.
    hot_daily
    [ puipui ]
         		6:12a
    Vintage Friday: Rosalind Franklin
    the_hms_stfu
    [ mariem_1 ]
         		12:56p
    Lupin was bribing people with food
    Snapefen on The Harry Potter Network are also wanking about Remus (I guess it's topic du jour or something).

    Excerpts:

    Silver Ink Pot

    I totally agree that Lupin wallows in self-pity.

    If JKR was trying to show someone who is stoical about a chronic illness, then she missed it by a mile.

    To me, Lupin is a quitter who takes the easy way out of things. Case in point - he only reluctantly teaches Harry how to make a Patronus, and even then he encourages Harry not to push himself too hard, and feeds him chocolate by the ton. Perhaps bribing people with food/gum/candy was the way Lupin learned to make friends in the first place?

    On Harry's sixteenth Birthday in HBP, Lupin comes in talking about how they found some dead bodies, and he even brings up Sirius and Regulus! It's crass and thoughtless of him. No wonder he is described as "gaunt and grim." Maybe Lupin has become the "new grim" of the story?

    This is the man Tonks is weeping over?

    To Mrs. Weasley’s displeasure, Harry's sixteenth birthday celebrations were marred by grisly tidings brought to the party by Remus Lupin, who was looking gaunt and grim, his brown hair streaked liberally with gray, his clothes more ragged and patched than ever.

    "There have been another couple of dementor attacks," he announced, as Mrs. Weasley passed him a large slice of birthday cake. "And they've found Igor Karkaroff's body in a shack up north. The Dark Mark had been set over it — well, frankly, I'm surprised he stayed alive for even a year after deserting the Death Eaters; Sirius's brother, Regulus, only managed a few days as far as I can remember."

    "Yes, well," said Mrs. Weasley, frowning, "perhaps we should talk about something
    diff—"

    Nyctalus

    I really think Sirius and Lupin must have been two of the most reluctant Order fighters Dumbledore had, even if they’re supposed to appear something else. In fact, I believe the only one who beats them to it is Dung (who, by the way, wakes up to simply “agree with Sirius” in the Order meeting we see in OotP, even though the meeting is over and he’s still asleep …) I can’t remember ever seeing these guys contributing with some creative or positive input regarding how to win the war against Voldemort; they’re much too occupied whining and wallowing in self pity…

    Indeed, I think “Bad News Lupin’s” appearance at Harry’s first ever birthday party was just… well, how shall I put it… heartless? Inconsiderate? Immensely clumsy? He doesn’t even take Molly’s hint… Do these guys lack every fragment of subtlety and tact? I remember feeling very disappointed on Harry’s behalf when I read that part; couldn’t the poor guy at least be given a break for once?

    And I think you're quite right,SIP; both Lupin and Sirius seem characterized by being in some way bad omens; if Sirius is the Grim, Lupin is actually the same species… And then there’s Tonks – a character I still had good hope for in OotP, since she seemed pretty lively. But then in HBP, there’s Lupin’s doom & gloom taking over her as well… Come to think of it, I believe Dumbledore’s most admirable trait was actually not wisdom nor tolerance – it was patience…

    SIP also found [info]ravenstar84's essay about Lily and misogyny. See also Misogyny is the New Godwin.
    Thursday, March 18th, 2010
    daily_snitch
    [ vitalitat ]
         		4:40p
    fandom_lounge
    [ braisinhussy ]
         		1:25p
    Comic-Con and the AHA
    This is hilarious. I hope Al Gore comes to the Futurama panel! (Oh jeez, I can't imagine what this is going to do to security.)

    News here and here.

    In short: the American Hospital Association is holding a leadership summit in San Diego. The same weekend as Comic-Con. Two blocks from the convention center. In a hotel that, up until yesterday, was on SDCC's official list of con hotels.

    Guests include Al Gore, Newt Gingrich, DeeDee Myers, Ken Burns and Freakonomics author Steven D. Levitt.

    (And speaking of SDCC hotels, is anyone else pacing back and forth, waiting for their confirmation email? Last year's booking sucked, but at least I knew by 10am. Submitted my list by 9:05, still haven't heard anything.)
    fandom_lounge
    [ atanvarne ]
         		12:08p
    When you give a rocket scientist Photoshop...
    ...you get really cool stuff!

    There are more shades of awesome here than I can shake a stick at. Check out Expedition 16's Matrix-themed poster (huge pdf, takes awhile). For a quicker preview, Gizmondo has a good write-up. There's even a ST:XI themed poster in the comments.
    fandom_lounge
    [ j_crew_guy ]
         		1:14p
    hot_daily
    [ puipui ]
         		5:13a
    Ferdinando Valencia
    daily_snitch
    [ bewarethesmirk ]
         		1:09a
    Wednesday, March 17th, 2010
    fandom_lounge
    [ freezer ]
         		10:27p
    Make it a Blockbuster night? Might want to make it soon.
    Time to say goodnight to the Blockbuster night?

    I've heard from more person that game rentals are the only thing that have kept Blockbuster afloat for this long. Between Netflix, On-Demand PPV, and Redbox kiosks, Blockbuster's damn near obsolete in terms of watching the newest vid releases.

    I hope they can right the ship, if just to save what jobs are left in Blockbusterville.
    fwank_icons
    [ eilisliana ]
         		10:19p
    Some simple action icons, free to take. :)

    A preview:

    The rest are under the cut: ( Read more... )
    random_lounge
    [ inalasahl ]
         		1:54p
    the_hms_stfu
    [ mariem_1 ]
         		8:25p
    Remus-gate is now on fandom_wank.

    There is also new insanity from duj (posted by [info]oryx_leucoryx for her):

    The HIV analogy might be what JK intended, but it's up to the reader to decide whether to accept her intentions. And I don't.

    The main problem with smallpotato's pedophile analogy is that wereLupin doesn't specifically target *children*. But the HIV analogy only works if you're specifying those who knowingly wilfully or recklessly infect others with HIV. One might say that that's just a different type of sexual offence/crime.

    Lupin is not *only* a victim; he is an offender. In his teens, he repeatedly risks infecting others - as a teen, he even "plans" his potentially-infective outings between full moons, even after "many" near-misses, and as an adult, he continues to take risks with other people's lives and humanity.

    Lupin is a serial offender. It is *luck* (authorial contrivance), not care, that has kept him from infecting others. According to Muggle law, he acts with criminal intent; *pretending* not to know the likely result of one's actions is not a mitigating factor in a crime.

    (And to add insult to injury, he scoffs at his victim for being traumatised. And follows this by negligently - at best - endangering the victim when he is unconscious: failing to treat or even examine him, failing to revive him, lifting him without supporting neck and spine, leaving his transport to someone who's previously tried to kill him.)

    Snape believes that Lupin was in on the trick, BTW - and James and Peter too - and there's a strong case for that. There is no indication the Marauders *ever* split over Sirius's apparent betrayal of a friend, and James's trust in Sirius's secret-keeping ability remained absolute, despite a supposedly blabbed secret.

    While we supposed it was *Lupin's* secret under threat from Snape's nosiness, his collusion seemed unlikely, but it's now clear that it was the *other* Marauders' secret: their illegal Animagus transformations. *They* were at risk; Lupin was not. His motive for colluding to protect it is *very* strong; he says those outings were "the best times of my life" ... about a page before his revealing admission "every time we sat down to plan our next month's adventure."

    What is the evidence that Lupin was *not* involved? None. Lupin is adept at suggestio falsi - witness his confiscation of the Map chapters earlier. His elliptic account - "Sirius thought it would be - er - amusing ....your father, who'd heard what Sirius had done, went after Snape..." so cleverly diffuses suspicion that no one ever *asks* if he or James were complicit. His innocence is assumed. The corollary is that it is never stated either.

    http://asylums.insanejournal.com/snapedom/262649.html?thread=2052857

    Neville had a particular reason to put Snape at the top of his fear list in the Boggart lesson: it was the first DADA lesson after the incident in Potions where Snape had warned him that "at the end of this lesson we will feed a few drops of this potion to your toad and see what happens..." and immediately before dosing the toad, added, "If, as I don't doubt, he has done it wrong, his toad is likely to be poisoned."

    Chaos and others assume that Snape was *enduringly* Neville's worst fear, when perhaps he was only *transiently* in that position.
    fandom_wank
    [ snacky ]
         		12:12p
    MOD POST: Email problems and an interruption in the wank
    Dear people of the wank communities,

    Please allow us a moment for wank business.

    Your mods are not receiving any emails from JF letting us know that there are posts in the mod queues, awaiting approval. This leads to wank back up, something none of us want.

    Until JF's email issue is resolved, if you submit a post, please also submit an email to the Modsquad (mods @ thefannish.org), so we will know it's waiting for approval.

    Thank you kindly,

    Your loving Modsquad
    Monday, March 15th, 2010
    clairvoyantwank
    [ ruffwriter ]
         		3:55p
    Tiny literary agent wank
    Not quite big enough for [info]otf_wank at the moment, but it's a good side dish to all the entitled authorwank on F_W proper lately.

    It started off as a fairly typical agent-searching story: aspiring writer e-mails a query letter to a Big Time literary agent. The project piques the agent's interest, and she asks for the manuscript. Writer sends manuscript... and then hears nothing for seven months. Writer asks the agent what's going on, and still hears nothing.

    The writer, in an ill-advised move, decides to go over the agent's head and inform her boss that she's taking too long, and in the ensuing e-mails, withdraws his manuscript from consideration.

    How does Big Time agent react? By posting the entire chain of correspondence, including enough of the query letter that another agent would be able to identify the writer, on her blog to teach him a lesson.

    Tiny kerfuffles have broken out in the comments of her post, in which the agent argues with dissenters, and the Absolute Write Bewares and Background Checks forum, where one of the agent's clients shows up to defend her. (Discussion of the post starts halfway down page 14, and the client shows up on page 15.)

    EDIT: ... is it just me, or did we travel back to March 15th just now? (Okay, yes, apparently so. Carry on!)
    fandom_wank
    [ tetradecimal ]
         		9:55a
    I'M THE GODDAMN ADMIN
    Direct from the pages of wank report:
    "Sheezyart's (http://sheezyart.com) admins troll members who use Adblock by forcing a flashing red and yellow background and music to appear for anyone who uses Adblock on their site."

    "Comments with a star are Sheezyart staff/admins, who have been the epitome of class throughout...

    The flashing background and music have since been removed and replaced with a text banner, but not before someone actually had a seizure from it."

    720+ comments, including an appearance on page two by the Goddamn Batman. Yes, that one.
    fandom_wank
    [ kaen ]
         		4:57p
    Yesterday over at rvb_slash (a community for Red vs. Blue slash) one of the mods makes a post saying, basically, I know I don't do much active modding, so are there any suggestions you all have for improving the community?

    It should have been clear this wasn't going to go well when the first comment is from somebody saying how they've left the community because it's gotten so awful, and then snarking at the next commenter when she says she's happy with it.

    Other people show up agreeing that it's gone downhill and there's a decent amount of wank in the first post, but it really takes off when the mod makes a second post addressing some of the concerns that came up.

    So, what's made the community become so awful that it's apparently driven off a bunch of old-timers and made one of the biggest wanker in the posts "[decide] the fandom needed saving" and feel like he's been holding the fort until things improve? Have oodles of trolls shown up while the mod wasn't paying attention? Has the community been flooded with off-topic posts?

    No, it's because everyone who's joined since October '08's fanfiction is bad and they should feel bad. They don't say exactly why October '08 (mid-October '08 to get even more specific) is so clearly the start of it's downfall, but they're very certain that's it.

    While there's wank scattered all over the place in the two posts, my personal favorite part would have to be [info]lvsinsanity insisting that fanwork about Freelancers shouldn't be allowed in the community unless those Freelancers have been seen interacting with the Red or Blue team, because clearly "Red vs. Blue Slash" refers to the teams instead of the name of the series. When people point out that it is named after the series, and any character that appears in it is fair game, lvsinsanity's response is that they're interrogating the text from the wrong perspective her way of viewing things makes perfect logical sense and Freelancers still don't belong there.

    Another thing to keep an eye out for is [info]primalreligion insisting all over the place that a certain character (York) should never be in slash fic because even though it never came up in canon there was an interview somewhere, he can not remember where, that says he was married.
    Tuesday, March 16th, 2010
    fandom_wank
    [ mariem_1 ]
         		1:42p
    The terrifying story of Remus Lupin, cannibal and pedophile, and matricidal werewolf fetus
    Snapefen at Snapedom are engaging in their favorite pastime - abusing everybody who isn't Snape or at least a Slytherin. This time their designated target is Remus Lupin. Note that this wank started 21 day ago and is still going on.

    It all began when [info]terri_testing posted an essay Remus (and other Lycanthropes) as Parents, where she depicts Remus as bad and irresponsible teacher, husband and father. Some excerpts:

    ( Read more )

    The essay ends with a horror-novel scenario:

    But if my reasoning is correct, human mothers, in general, can only carry a human child to term. So Remus should have been angsting over the possibility that Tonks would miscarry her much-wanted child, not that it would be born a lycanthrope. But he wasn’t.

    Unless the only precedents Remus knew of involved werewolf mothers, who must always produce werewolf children if any. In which case Remus got Tonks pregnant while believing that any child he fathered MUST be born a lycanthrope.

    *

    But there’s a wrinkle thrown into all this by the fact that Tonks is a Metamorphmagus.

    She can alter her body—including, we have seen, taking on superficial bestial characteristics (a pig’s snout). Can she alter other organs to be bestial? Specifically, can she alter her uterus and the mother’s portion of the placenta, perhaps subconsciously, to be more lupine to save her changing child?

    If she can, that opens a truly chilling possibility. The metamorphmagus alters her uterus at the first full moon after conception, and manages to carry her lycanthrope fetus past the first full moon. And past the second, and the third….

    Over time her fetus’s nervous system develops, and with it its normal instincts. Human, for almost all of the month. Except for those few hours when the full moon is above the horizon.

    Her fetus will have no teeth, not before birth, unless that might be another point in which werewolves are unlike other canids, but it will eventually grow claws.

    And then will come another full moon, the last one, and the werewolf-fetus’s instincts will urge it overwhelmingly to rend, to tear, the nearest human.

    The one surrounding it.

    [info]terri_testing also posted a drabble Teddy’s Sister to go with her essay. I guess the name of Teddy's sister is Renesmee Lupin.

    [info]sailorlum, a sane Snape fan and Lupin fan, decided to argue, that Remus didn't completely suck. That caused a huge wankfest, where [info]terri_testing, [info]oryx_leucoryx, [info]00sevvie, duj and [info]oneadthetruth argued that Remus was a bad guy, that it was cruel of him to make Snape!boggart look funny and not to drink Wolfsbane Snape brought immediately ("HOW ON EARTH is that scene supposed to be FUNNY to anyone in a way that does not deny the validity of Severus' pain? HOW?", wondered [info]terri_testing), that Remus was hunting human prey with his friends the animals, that [info]terri_testing is Lizzie Bennett and Lupin is Wickham, that Remus was only kind to Molly because she cooked for the Order and that werewolf!Lupin was probably more aggressive than werewolf!Greyback. Several Snapefen were also pretty rude to [info]sailorlum. My favorite exchange is this one:

    ( Read more )

    After all that [info]00sevvie made a new Snapedom post, where she bemoaned supposed whitewashing of Lupin's flaws and lack of validation of Snape's pain and trauma from other HP characters, JKR and [info]sailorlum. [info]marionros/[info]smallpotato appeared in the comments to this post and proved how logical and reasonable she is by claiming that lycanthropy symbolizes pedophilia and that Remus metaphorically almost raped Snape while at school:

    ( Read more )

    ETA: Harry has no ability to love and Ginny reminds him of Bellatrix.

    ETA 2: [info]farmercuerden summarized the Snapewank in a song.
    otf_wank
    [ theelusiven ]
         		7:08p
    In France they call it a Royale with Wank....
    An afternoon snack in miniwank form from [info]customers_suck, courtesy of a mousie from [info]wank_report , from whom the writeup is copypasta'd because journalfen ate the writeup I was working on. There's pedantry here to rival the Buttercream wank from awhile back. Thanks, mousie!

    Over at [info]Customers_Suck, [info]haine_otomiya86 posts about a particularly irate customer who - among other things - was unclear about whether he needed a "McDouble," which costs $1.00, and a "Double Cheese Burger," which costs $1.19. The story goes on to describe how the poster had to double check which one the customer actually wanted, as well as a quick mention as to what the difference between these two sandwiches are. Answer: the $1.00 one contains two patties and one slice of cheese, and the $1.19 contains two patties and two slices of cheese.

    However, for one [info]magickcat, bothering a customer for clarification is apparently unacceptable.

    Okay, seriously?
    The customer was a jackass, I will give you that.
    HOWEVER, your fussiness here about the McDouble/Double Cheeseburger thing is beyond ridiculous.
    I don't mean in dealing with this guy- you did the best you could with an idiot like that, but for YEARS there was a dollar menu double cheeseburger.
    Just because they took out one slice of cheese last year and decided to call it a "McDouble" doesn't mean that you shouldn't know what the heck someone is talking about when they specifty the "dollar menu double cheeseburger" which is EXACTLY WHAT A MCDOUBLE IS. There is a bun, there are two burgers, and there is cheese. I don't care how much you charge for it, its a freaking double cheeseburger. When someone specifies the "dollar menu double cheeseburger", if you don't know what they are talking about, well.... yeah.


    As the thread unfolds, the reason for such an outburst is soon explained... [info]magickcat is in fact a Cheeseburger Master!

    I understand the math of the cheese, I really do.
    What I am saying in that it is still a double cheeseburger, because it is...get this... two burgers.. WITH CHEESE.
    I don't eat at fast food restaurants, as a general rule, and we don't have In & Outs here, so your reference means nothing to me. It certainly isn't rocket science. I know a few rocket scientists, and they know that a sandwich with 2 burgers and cheese is a double cheeseburger. ;)

    "I understand the math of the cheese" may be my new favorite phrase.

    Cue rabid dogpiling and unsuccessful attempts to reason with Earth Logic and first grade math. Unfortunately it is all for naught as even [info]magickcat does not seem to know what exactly the point of the argument is. Depending on which thread you visit, it waffles from "they're both cheeseburgers; it's all the same" "Oh, you misunderstood: I wasn't talking about this customer at all, only a theoretical situation where everything was described perfectly," to the cost difference is all a conspiracy by McDonalds":

    NO, it costs more because McDonalds saw a way to make more money by adding another burger. They are all "meat"burgers, if you can legally call whatever they put in those things "meat"... I know damn well what is in each one because it was in the news and whatnot about what the change would be. My case is correct, and it stands.


    And the arguments just keep coming...

    Current Mood: *sporfle!*
    Wednesday, March 17th, 2010
    fandom_lounge
    [ coffee_mug ]
         		4:20p
    TV.com picks TV's "craziest fanbases"...
    For those who enjoy "mainstream-meets-fandom" type of events.

    Quote/link: It's difficult to say why, but some shows simply attract a different breed of supporters. Creepy, scary, insane supporters. And so we present TV's craziest fans, who've taken their love of TV to the next, sick level.

    ..this article is seriously stupid.

    Highlights include "omg somebody made a Hurley fanvid, how bizarre" (awesome fanvid, and I'm not even a Lost fan!), fanfiction trailers (I admit these are weird to me but only because the fics I've seen have such are usually unbearably shitty), Supernatural fanfic (Wincest & Dean/Castiel) and "Mad Men fans aren't crazy because they're pretentious and that show's overrated, wahhh".

    Looks like the guy writing this googled and youtube searched a few shows and found some pretty average fandom-created materials and decided to label them sick and insane and gross and weird. Yaaaawn.
    hot_daily
    [ puipui ]
         		3:44a
    Anne Hathaway
    Tuesday, March 16th, 2010
    daily_snitch
    [ vitalitat ]
         		4:18p
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