I HAVE ACQUIRED SHOES.
I failed in a number of attempts I made today, but I have shoes. Nice shoes for work! Or, well, nice-looking black Converse for work, I'm going to work Tenth Doctor style. Anyway I now own six pairs of shoes, which is more than I've owned at one time in my entire life, I think. I'm not really a shoe person.
Every time I go downtown, though, someone says something questionable about my sexuality. This time I was in the Disney store looking at superhero action figures (shut up, action figures are cool) and a clerk in a headset walked up to me and said, "Hi! Are you a superhero fan? Do you have a superhero at home? Or maybe you just like strong men!" and I was like PLEASE WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO ME, WHY WOULD YOU THINK I HAVE A SUPERHERO AT HOME, THEY ARE NOT REAL.
So congratulations, Disney Store, your creeptastic store manager drove me hurriedly from the store with her remarks about superheroes. I went to the comic book store today and nobody there asked me if I had a superhero at home, though I did have a lovely conversation with the counter guy about X-Club, which is the fucking funniest comic book I think I've ever read. ("Oh! This has Dr. Nemesis, right?" "Yeah! He's hilarious." "I've never seen such a likeable character who hates everything. All I do is seethe in silence! I want hugs!" "I KNOW RIGHT.")
Maybe it's just Block 37. I was in the train station there the last time this happened, and they also house the Bakery Which Must Not Be Named.