Below are the 3 most recent journal entries recorded in Dingsi's LiveJournal:

Monday, July 28th, 2008
11:59 pm	So, about this hotties / drag / androgyny picspam thing... ... I've searched most of my image folders and now proudly bombard you with visual evidence of pretty men being even prettier with make-up. Or something. This was inspired by the Monthly Drag post over at hot_daily (Sigooouurneey ♥), and then I was very happy and said so and puipui asked for a picspam. Oh, and while we're at it, this comment amused me to no end. I'd watch unbearable drivel as long as Alan Rickman is in it (case in point: the Harry Potter movies). ANYHOW, lots of images behind the cut (i.e. death to dial-up), and at least one of them's not worksafe. ( I present: David Sylvian (duh!), Jaye Davidson, Eddie Izzard, and some unknown models. ) Also, I wanted to include Steve Strange, then remembered that I had already posted pictures of him to DivineAndrogyne on InsaneJournal. See tags page; hopefully it's after someone's liking. Oh, and is there any way to include Steve Jansen? Maybe? (Not mandatory. But at least Jensen Ackles? Please. I have such a Dean!crush, and I voted for him in the poll, but the other people all had no taste, waaah.) I'm rambling and slightly aroused. Help. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, May 5th, 2008
10:31 pm	Ache. I have issues. IJ does not update, in fact it's not accessible at all. Because of the server move, and some data / table optimization which, according to IJ's Twitter page, is a time-consuming process. It sucks, because most of the projects I've been working on are located on InsaneJournal, or rely on link roundups and other data I put there in private posts. But being honest: I'm not sure I'd have had any work done even if IJ was up and running. I'm not sure if it's solely due to the recent "Kristallnacht" RPG 'wank', which has been solved on the surface because the mods eventually changed the name and the images, but the fallout is happening still, including people on my friendslist who were involved or affected directly, and that's another layer of closeness making it hard to push the topic back and concentrate on something else. What gets me -- exhausts me -- is not that people are hurt and angry and annoyed, or even the people themselves. (Although the event in question is ugly enough, definitely.) It's how, suddenly, I see some arguments pop up that are pretty nasty, and nastily familiar from various -ism discussions I followed all over the net. Suddenly people say things like "Why don't you focus on something more important?" and "Can't you just get over it?" and "Tone, people, TONE!" and "Well, the [minority] have said mean things, TOO!" ... and all I can think is "Oh no, not again", and shut down. I keep imagining the events in a slightly different scenario -- with, say, an RPG title that was trivializing the murder of trans people -- and then I see myself in the place of the Jewish minority and imagine the things they got to hear being said to me, and I wonder how many people would tell me under those circumstances that I shouldn't be so upset, stop overreacting, stop being childish, and so on. Would it help if some of those people were mutual friends, making them more sympathetic towards my cause, as they already know me as a human being and someone they talked to on many occasions? Or would it make it worse -- because, looking at it realistically, it would not be the first time that friends revealed some unconscious bias or expressed opinions I perceive as deeply hurtful. What I take away from this -- now more so, that I am more familiar with how -isms and certain defense mechanisms work -- is mainly a deeply unsettling feeling of fragility. Vulnerability. Because it's not about the obvious nutjobs and assholes. It's about the fact that perfectly nice, well-meaning, intelligent, friendly people can still say or do something racist, sexist, transphobic, antisemitic, et cetera. Yes, that includes myself. It includes my family. It includes my friends. When you are part of the minority in such occurrances, the discussion is always draining. It's very personal, it's harder when you aren't backed up by privilege, it's harder when you have already established patterns and stereotypes working against you ("Those uppity PoC / angry feminists / greedy Jews / etc. are at it AGAIN!"), and when you have to withdraw or try to set boundaries because it's too much for you to deal with at the moment, it's often being held against you. I'm still thinking it over. I'm still wondering what the hell to do. Or how to put it. Or if I should write about it at all. This, here? Is just collecting a bunch of loose thoughts and putting the emotional belly ache on paper. If I didn't, I'd probably implode. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, April 27th, 2008
6:30 pm	O HAI UPDATE. Apparently I have no problems whatsoever with commenting on entries that are half a year old. Then again, hey, it's not like every community is super active anyway, and also, I shouldn't always worry so much. You know what I think? I totally WON'T be able to let this account go unused. I'm just not sure if I should finally try out Semagic for cross-posting, or make individual entries. In my experience, the virtual surroundings influence the content, and I have never felt at ease with the idea of duplicating entries, for some reason (but I am grateful that others do it, of course -- many friends on IJ do cross-post from LJ). We'll see. (7 Comments |Comment on this)