ealusaid

ealusaid @ 2008-03-14T09:55:00

2008-03-14T15:55:43Z

Awesome! Is it down for everyone, or just me?

ealusaid @ 2008-02-14T22:04:00

2008-02-15T05:05:57Z

For your daily dose of win: all the Latin you ever need to surf the internets.

Multifandom Petit-fours

2008-02-01T09:13:22Z

I stayed up way too late and talked with a friend about how much I liked those mini-fics from the SG:A wank, and because of puipui I know the term "petit four" for them (mmm, delicious French snacks...) so we pulled some summaries off the Pit of Voles and wrote petit-fours on the same prompts. There are six of them. Her versions are f'locked, sadly.

Title: The Best Friend of All Holds the Key (To Your Cell)
Author: goldjadeocean
Length: 16 words
Genre: Humour
Summary: Hermione Granger thinks that she is in love with Draco Malfoy... but is she?

"Ron, how long until that love potion wears off? We can't keep her tied down forever."

Title:: The Touch of Loving Hands
Author: goldjadeocean
Length: 6 words
Genre: H/c, HG/SS
Summary: An Ex-Death Eater walks into a bar.

"Ouch!"

"Professor, are you all right?"

Title:: I Did Not Know the Road I Followed
Author: goldjadeocean
Length: 30 words
Genre: Gen, some violence
Summary: After being kicked out of Page training, something happens to Kel that will change her life forever.

As her husband's blood soaked through the mats on the floor, Keladry gripped her glaive even more tightly and wondered what the punishment for killing the Emperor's fifth cousin was.

Title: The Blood Will Out
Author: goldjadeocean
Length: 55 Words
Genre: Romance, angst
Summary: Sooner or later, someone was going to find out. K/D, K/J, AU

Joren winced again, looking uncomfortable. "Are you sure there's no cure for this affliction?"

The Healer shook his head. "I would advise you to find anyone who might have given it to you, to prevent it from spreading."

He would. But what he especially wanted to know was who had given it to her.

Title:: I Love You Like It's a Disease
Author: goldjadeocean
Length: 12 words
Genre: BDSM, questionable non-con
Summary: Spike is in an abusive relationship with Buffy, which is swiftly escalating to a very dangerous place.

Spike pulled vainly at the handcuffs, desperately trying to remember their safeword.

Title:: And Some Are Nightmares
Author: goldjadeocean
Length: 21 words
Genre: My fiction transcends your petty boundaries!
Summary: Buffy tells Xander about kissing him in her dream

"And then you started eating me."

"Oh. That's... kinky."

"No, I mean with fangs. And not the good kind, either."

ealusaid @ 2008-01-03T09:43:00

2008-01-03T16:52:22Z

I am sick and I was planning on going to the University bookstore to pick up my textbooks today. :( I could just sew instead and order the books online for slightly more money which doesn't really matter anyway because my grandmother pays for my books.

I've been working on a Firefly fic despite the fact that I have eighty jillion other pieces of work to do.

Title: Chief Cook and Bottle-Washer
Rating: PG-13
Length: 1,566 words
Summary: Mal pounded down the hallway from the bridge, making it to the kitchen in about ten strides, fetching up on the door with a little bounce on the balls of his feet. Kaylee knew he was happy about something, but from the pulled-tight serious look on his face, he'd set it by 'till he could spring it on somebody. It was just her and River right now; she'd been up since before breakfast, chasing a series of minor electrical outages back to a nest of mice they'd picked up by accident on Osiris. One of the first things anybody'd noticed was down were the heating elements in the kitchen, and the first that Kaylee'd fixed by rerouting it, but then while everybody ate she had to see what else was wrong.

Jayne was off killing the rats now. He was going to stir-fry them for dinner, since her Cap'n had put his foot down about keeping them as pets, seeing as there wasn't much for the people on board to eat, much less rodents. Simon'd tried to back her up, since rats were lucky, but nobody else was behind the idea.

So Kaylee was wondering if maybe he'd tell her they had a cage all set up ready in her room, but instead he said, "River," all serious-like, and River put down her reader and got up, like she'd already got her orders, and pushed past him up to the bridge.

"What is it?" Kaylee asked, not really liking them sharing secrets plain as day, and the smile broke over Mal's face.

"Your old man called. He's got a job for us, if we head over his way."

Kaylee stood stock-still for a moment, as her blood dropped out and ice flushed through her system for a moment, then everything clicked back over to normal again; then she pushed away from the table and took three steps to wrap her arms around Mal and land a kiss on his cheek. "Oh, Cap'n! I ain't never seen him in years!"

She managed to bounce back, since he was being all standoffish, and River said from the top of the stairs to the bridge, "You'll have to introduce him to Simon."

She started to grin, but got cut off by an impending sense of doom, namely that of Simon on Beylix; and then Jayne came up the stairs from the cargo bay, holding a bunch of dead rats by their tails. Kaylee reached out to squeeze Mal's arm, then turned around to grab her breakfast and head into the engine room with it.

It was still overpowering force of habit to inventory the infirmary every day; it stood at the centre of ever-widening rings of chaos. Simon was more than aware that as a castaway in this ship, it was the only real power he had. Money and resources, influence, friends, were all gone, and he'd finally stopped running into the mental wall in his plans or daydreams that said he couldn't do such-a-thing because he no longer had an ident card or credit chip, necessities of life until you suddenly didn't have them, because he'd stopped daydreaming about things that would require them.

But if he was slowly making the mental transition that left him permanently rootless, relying on what fit in a ship, or a bag, or a pocket, then other than this he had nothing. He was a bad shot, an indifferent liar, nothing of an entrepreneur; all Simon Tam was was a very good doctor. Which mattered, if nothing else did, so he couldn't let it slip.

"There are babies," River said from the doorway, as Simon's hand hovered over a curiously empty spot in his tray of tools. He looked over, and frowned. She had one arm wrapped around herself and looked sober, but he couldn't tell if there was anything more than that. Since Miranda, it was hard to tell what kind of day it would be; she was incalculably better than before, but so much of the damage was purely biological and possibly permanent. He couldn't be lulled into wishful thinking that she was entirely okay, because that made it worse for him when she wasn't.

"Babies? Whose babies?"

"The mother's babies. You won't be able to tell. Reprocessed, repackaged, made less identifiable. They're edible that way." There was a pause, and her voice lost its vague sound. "He took your scalpel to do it."

He knew what to do when she stepped back, and as he took the stairs two at a time he cursed Jayne in the name of every rat to have ever lived. Even here, there had to be some rules of civility, or they'd all end up--eating rats.

He was running out of levels of depravity to which they had yet to stoop.

"The best part is the tails," Jayne was saying, looking up from his work at Zoe, who leaned against the kitchen table and took another swill of Kaylee's moonshine. "Grill 'em up-" and then they both looked at Simon.

Without any real clue how this would go, he said, "River said you had babies."

Old news to Zoe (he was belatedly thankful, suddenly aware of how badly that might have gone now that it hadn't) and Jayne just gave a wry grin. "Protein's protein, doctor. You gonna turn your nose up at real meat?"

With the implied not like a real man but Simon was used to ignoring that; old and new arrogance both said he didn't need to pick his bones with the teeth of his enemies, even out here; being a doctor carried its own weight. "You are not going to use my instruments to slice up rat babies and feed them to us for dinner."

"It's the only blade in the whole ship that can do the job, unless I fry them whole."

"No," Zoe said. "Jayne, I am not eating a whole one. I have to be able to pretend it's something halfway decent." Simon saw an opening and extended his hand for the scalpel. He saw Jayne eye them both, and do a quick mental count of the rest of the ship--Inara, no, too fancy; Kaylle, hell no; River, who knew, and Mal wouldn't unless Inara did.

"Not worth the effort anyway," he said, throwing the scalpel down on the counter.

Simon cleaned the scalpel and returned it to its rightful place, deposited the babies into the incinerator chute with little twists of yellow paper River had made, and went to check up on Kaylee.

She was in her hammock, picking at the remains of a protein bar with her nails. She looked up and smiled when he came in and sat sideways on the end of the hammock, but was obviously painted a mild shade of glum today.

So--talk about what made her happiest. "How much damage was done to the wiring?"

She flicked her hand dismissively--no big deal--but came more present. "Not much important. I just had to jimmy everything around to make some of the shorter wires fit now." A reflective pause. "Wish I knew how they got in there. We haven't had rats before. I hope Jayne got them all out."

Simon resolved not to mention the babies. "Did the captain say we had a course yet?"

Her face dropped back as close to melancholy as Kaylee ever got, and she looked up sidelong at him through her eyelashes. "Beylix."

"That's where your family is, isn't it?"

She wriggled her toes, and he took the hint to start rubbing her feet. "Yep. After I took up in Serenity, they got to thinking that maybe they could do better. I seen 'em once since I left home, and they're doing all right on Beylix. They'll be glad to see me again."

He was still sorting through things; fluid life out here, bouncing from one planet to the next in the black, until one suddenly had roots, suddenly meant something. Like testing water, he ventured, "I think I'd like to meet your family."

Which was obviously something she'd been worried about, because she lit right up at that (he cringed a little inside at how obviously she'd been expecting him to say something stupid) and grinned at him. "That'll be nice."

Eventually, she went to work doing routine maintenance on finicky bits of Serenity's engine, and a while after that he went back downstairs, and lost valiantly to River for three games of checkers.

Then lunchtime rolled around. They might have made some kind of stand--had there been many options, most of them might. Had Shepherd Book been there, Simon thought, they might have reconsidered. He'd never noticed then how much of a civilizing influence the Shepherd had until now, when he was gone and the world had changed again.

But by now they were all starving for something remotely different, and by now they only opened cans every third day, so in the end, Serenity's crew sat down around their kitchen table and ate rat.

ealusaid @ 2007-11-28T17:01:00

2007-11-29T00:03:35Z

I passed my advanced road test!

I'll have my driver's licence in a month. Until then, I have a crappy piece of paper.

Also, I got my passport photo taken on the weekend. It was really gross, but the guy at the photo place said they like them that way. I figure it's because ~~when~~ if I create an international incident that's embarassing to Canada, they can get back at me by showing my really really gross passport photo on the national news.

dies and IS DEAD

2007-11-23T07:15:06Z

Fabio: Writer of Romance Novels.

ealusaid @ 2007-11-20T19:09:00

2007-11-21T02:11:12Z

Nice start, but a little shaky on the dismount.

Know what's exciting? I have TEA. After a week with two term papers due and NO TEA, this dramatically changes my inner landcape.

ETA: And oddly, I'm not getting comment emails on this entry.

ealusaid @ 2007-11-12T10:57:00

2007-11-12T17:55:31Z

To go with the cool pants:

More ways than you ever needed to tie your shoes.

ealusaid @ 2007-11-11T12:45:00

2007-11-11T20:02:25Z

I'm not really able to handle a journal that's actually, like, interesting and shit to people I kind-of know. So there's this, which I almost never write in, and goldjadeocean at lj, in which I am the tealiest deer you ever did see about my minute emotional breakthroughs in therapy or the rocks in the stream on my campus or stuff like that.

I would offer something cool I've written, but people seem to like porn and I'm bad at porn. I tried an Elizabeth the Golden Age/Temeraire crossover with an Elizabeth/Raleigh/Bess threesome and it was just all them sitting in their bedclothes talking about The Faerie Queene because I hate it. Which contains no sex, and is so boring I stopped writing it.

And I totally forgot about it until last Thursday, but I have a research paper due on Tuesday about Sir Phillip Sidney's Astrophil and Stella, which is a really creepy series of sonnets about this guy's obsession with his 13-year-old cousin. Except for the part when it's about, I don't know, how much he loves pancakes. I haven't done any research yet so I don't know what it's about except for him whining because he can't get laid.

I really hate my 16th-cen lit class because now I'm realizing where all the sexist racist shit in the world COMES from. I started reading Ben Jonson's The Masque of Blackness but then realized I'd already read that wank.

My other paper is on women in the late middle ages, which makes me a lot happier, because I already knew the worst bits so now I'm just finding places where the sexism doesn't apply and things like a load of female artisans who were able to handle their businesses completely independently of their husbands, and it's an excuse to read more Christine de Pisan.

So I'm going to go do homework, and I leave you all with some really awesome pants.

Everyone else is going nuts.

2007-11-02T05:41:11Z

Meanwhile, I am so damn happy I'm not doing NaNo. *stretches, sips her drink, leisurely taps out a few hundred words*

ealusaid @ 2007-10-19T23:47:00

2007-10-20T05:48:27Z

I love Dumbledore being gay. I'm sure they'll be at each other's throats by morning, but HP fandom is one big orgy of love and goodwill tonight.

I also love that after explaining that Dumby's Thing with Grindlewald was a great tragic love affair she chuckled, "Oh my god, the fanfiction."

Because equality is sexy

2007-10-19T05:10:27Z

Busting stereotypes that peg feminists as men-haters, a new study shows that having a feminist partner is linked with healthier, more romantic heterosexual relationships.

ealusaid @ 2007-10-16T13:31:00

2007-10-16T19:39:57Z

I'm kind of lucky I'm a psych major, because it helps me save face when I'm checking out books in the inter-library loan system. I mean, research for class is a good reason to have books on dissociative identity disorder coming in for me three days in a row; I somehow don't think trying to understand and either deal with or call bullshit on someone on a site I mod is a good explanation. Never mind what they're thinking now that I'm getting a ton of books on self-injury.

I kind of love FW, as an admin. I've already seen the heights of internet perfidy, so I'm by no means shocked by sockpuppets, internet muchausens, or general jackassery.

I haven't seen very much of the Battlestar Galactica: Razor flashbacks, but I'm still kind of sad at how bad they seem to be. BSG as a whole makes me sad.

What else makes me sad? Bionic Woman. It also could be awesome if it didn't suck so much.

ealusaid @ 2007-10-13T20:55:00

2007-10-14T02:55:52Z

This is absolutely mesmerising.

Because I don't use this thing enough

2007-09-27T04:36:58Z

The downside of going to a college in the middle of nowhere in Alberta is realizing that the food you really, really want is now two and a half hours away.

(Als. happy [belated] birthday, PuiPui)

Ps. Is there actually anyone on here who cares whether or not I post Emelan fanfic?

ealusaid @ 2007-09-05T21:27:00

2007-09-06T03:36:24Z

I am such an absolute scatterbrain. A week ago, I wrote a very short Emelan fanfic and sent it off to two people--one random bystander in a forum who said she'd like to read it when I mentioned in passing that my writing was being irritating, and my beta. So a few days ago when I got back a copy marked up with corrections, I assumed it was from my beta.

The corrections were absolutely on crack. They crossed out every use of "had" as a helper verb, explaining that I should avoid the passive voice, except it was all in sentences like "They had arrived the previous week, and were now well-acquainted with the city." And then criticised that the timeline didn't make sense because two separate timelines seemed to be happening at the same time. I was absolutely mortified, since my beta is a wonderful writer who was, I thought, very well-versed in grammar, and walked around in a pensive mood for a few days considering how to address it.

So today in IM with her I carefully and apologetically broached the difference between passive and pluperfect and why the fic actually had two timelines and her critique was, well, wrong and she went, "Wait, that Emelan fic with Tris? Um... I haven't even finished it yet, to be honest." And I go back and see that the revisions come from the person I'd never even met before.

Why do I keep doing this? I'll talk about a friend to them in their own livejournal, too. I keep blanking out on usernames. It's a really good thing I'm not in the habit of gossiping about my friends, or I'd be in real trouble.

ealusaid @ 2007-09-04T13:14:00

2007-09-04T19:14:31Z

Roommate appears to be entirely devoid of fleas. Also speaks Norweigan.

ealusaid @ 2007-09-02T23:00:00

2007-09-03T05:01:07Z

Thanks to this thread, I'm terrified to meet my college roommate tomorrow. Because of it, I'm sure to say something stupid like, "Thank God, I thought you'd have fleas."

ealusaid @ 2007-08-31T19:34:00

2007-09-01T01:34:34Z

*looks shifty*

ealusaid @ 2007-08-30T11:34:00

2007-08-30T17:50:25Z

I should be packing for college, but instead I'm sitting around watching as much Victorian Romance Emma as I can get my hands on. I'm three episodes into the second act, and I loves it.

The basic premise is that, in London of roughly 1895, Emma, a housemaid, falls in love with William Jones, the heir to a merchant family that was elevated into the gentry sometime in his father's lifetime. What I love most about it is, it never once shocks you out of the time period. It's a truly adult romance story, which I love.

So Emma's meek and demure and all those good things, while William is a bit of a space cadet. While he can be entirely charming when he wants to be, he really doesn't realise that being charming to a shy debutante will make her fall in love with him. He announces that he's in love with a maid to his entire family and tells his father, "I'm sure society will understand in time" and, well, I'm sure the fangirls agree, but his father and I (and Emma) can't help but think the boy's a bit clueless.

I guess I like it so much because the author seems to be sending the message that it takes more than attraction to make things work. When someone finally yells at William for being a total ass to the debutante, Eleanor, and he finally treats her right, I cheer even though it means he can't be with Emma, because what he and Emma realise at the end of the first season is that they wouldn't have been happy together, not really--beyond affection, most of the people they knew would have made their lives a living hell.

It's possible the story will come up for a way for it to work, but it will be because they will find specific ways to remove all those obstacles (there's always the beloved Victorian trick of making Emma the orphan of some rich nobles, I don't know) but there's also the fact that it will hurt, but if William marries Eleanor and Emma gives the time of day to the hunky footman at her new job, they could all actually be happy and perhaps look back on the doomed romance as something that made them both open up, to other people if it wasn't possible to be together.

And that's so much more satisfying.

ealusaid @ 2007-08-29T11:08:00

2007-08-29T17:11:05Z

The Tim Horton's store locator scares me. It lists all the places where, say, gas stations sell their coffee, so when I do a search of my neighborhood it shows three stores within two km of my house, and I'm left confusedly wondering why I haven't been seeing the invisible Tim Horton's, because clearly those stores are ninjas.

11:00 is the saddest time of day. That's when they stop making breakfast sandwiches.

ealusaid @ 2007-08-27T00:59:00

2007-08-27T07:06:15Z

Somehow it's turned into sockpuppet season in Pierce fandom. Twice today (from two different sites) I got, "We think so-and-so is actually that old member who left in a fit of stupid, could you check IPs?" I think it's a downside of a place that's FULL OF FLOUNCE.

One RP I used to be part of had a flood of people creating twenty characters a day so it made up a rule that every character needs at least a basic profile page. One so-and-so decided the rules didn't apply to her and naturally the modmin would agree with her.

Modmin: Player, why don't you have any profiles up for your characters?
Player: my site crashed, it's not fixable.
Modmin: you do know that you have to have a profile for your characters now, even if it's just short?
Player: I have pictures of them, that should be enough. i can stop playing them, if you want.
Modmin: yes, please. You can start playing them again as soon as you actually have profiles up again. Though I'm not going to ask you to stop in the middle of this scene. That would be a little too rediculous.
Player: you actually want me to stop playing them? ahah. if you make me stop playing them, i promise you that i will actually leave for good now, rather than being lazy about it.
Modmin: I don't care. The rules are the rules and they apply to everyone, including you. If you don't like that you are very welcome to leave.
Player: ahahah. seriously? okay, consider me left.

And then there's the stupid part where I volunteered to hack a flawed byzantine PHP script when I have almost no actual knowledge of PHP.

On the upside, I got fic written last night.

ealusaid @ 2007-08-11T01:26:00

2007-08-11T07:30:15Z

There aren't words to express my GLEE over the Stardust movie.

Instead, with the vain hope that someone else will share some corner of my obscure interests, I will say it contains VICTORIAN CANE FIGHTING. I give this movie's fight choreographer a Thumb Up.

Also, Sienna Miller is finally the twat her fashion sense always told us she could be. Win!

ealusaid @ 2007-08-06T21:12:00

2007-08-07T03:21:41Z

I'm sunburned and sore and back from a historical re-creation event in Saskatchewan. There were some awesome parts; I'm now a Lady, and I got authorized to do equestrian combat and tilting at the trot.

However, explaining my knee to a physiotherapist will be kind of irritating. I tripped on my skirt while I was swordfighting and went ass over teakettle, and wrenched the joint.

I kind of hate explaining fannish activities to mundanes. I think it comes from having eight fingers, which I had to explain to pretty much everyone I met, because, after all, what would be rude to ask of an adult isn't rude of a child. I got so good at masking the small hand it took new aquaintances an average of three weeks to spot it.

These days, I'm more than ready for them.

Hesitantly: "Um, hey... can I just ask? What happened to your hand?"

Innocent reply: "Sorry, my... hand?" A pause, for examination, provoking by the vehemently horrified: "SHIT!"

I feel so bad, because they fall for it every time.

I also feel bad for realizing the guy I spent months mooning after during my gap year is actually just really whiny and emo. Thank God I didn't do anything stupid there.

ealusaid @ 2007-07-02T00:25:00

2007-07-02T06:34:01Z

Today had the most incredibly frustrating fight with my mom ever. This tops the "Sweetie, you have too many books and should throw them out" discussion.

This was the, "You should write books aimed at 10-12 year olds and make them about the real world, because I don't think that anyone will read what you're writing now, and you're just hiding from the truth" argument.

Yes, mom. Because adult fantasy doesn't have an audience, nobody likes my hurt/comfort or angstfic ever at all, and writing thinly veiled sci-fi about my highschool experience clearly isn't working. Despite the fact that you haven't read anything I've written since I was twelve, even though I keep giving you drafts and letting you into my fic journal and guiding you through the exhausting process of looking at your own LJ userinfo to find it.

"Because really, Harry Potter has gotten kids to read, but has it affected anyone's life beyond that? I doubt it."

And she drank all the booze over dinner. And I have course selection at eight in the morning tomorrow. I am not pleased about any of this.