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Faulty Premise (![[info]](http://www.journalfen.net/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} faultypremise) wrote,@ 2007-08-16 23:05:00 |
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Because I can't help myself.
Oh MsScribe... you cosmically stupid tart.
So I have permission to post this. Enjoy it because it'll be the last of it's kind.
Until the next time.
Although it doesn’t matter much anymore, Clara asked that I write this up.
Did she.
(Oh, didn't Charlotte tell you that she was real?
Have you told your psychiatrist about these voices in your head talking to you? They prescribe medication for that kind of thing, you know. Also, they have padded white cells and these very fashionable jackets that fit so snugly around you you can't stop hugging yourself.
Nanea used to talk to her on the phone. Also to me. We sound different. Also, you know, when I was hospitalized Nanea talked to her because I was incapable of it. )
Well of course you couldn't communicate with anyone yourself, at that time, you were busy having your fake crisis. That's why you used sock puppets, duh. We already know this.
Frankly, I don’t think this post is all that necessary but here it goes.
No, not necessary, except I'm sure being out of the limelight lately is killing you.
I was never going to post this and Clara didn't want me to but she has since changed her mind since this whole thing has put a strain (for her) on our friendship.
Understandable. After all, she's probably the little devil sitting on your left shoulder.
This whole Bad Penny thing has done me a lot of good, though. I’m sure this wasn’t their intention, but it has. I’ll explain later.
My nipples explode with anticipatory delight to hear that one.
In the beginning (In know, I know, a little Biblical but bear with me) I was in a car accident. I had a head injury.
You know, if this is actually true, it explains a lot right there.
The oldest was only 6 months old and so we got my neighbor’s younger cousin who had come to visit a few times to care for her (and me) during my recovery. Think I’m vying for sympathy here? Read back to me the number of posts I’ve made detailing this part of my past in the last 6 years. Like four, maybe?
Vying for sympathy? Not yet, but you've laid down a nice groundwork.
So yeah, I didn’t meet Clara on the web. We totally got online together and SarahKJames? Her college roommate (A funny chick who I’d love to get back in contact with) would come with her for weekends at my house. They’d do laundry. Oh, and in case you’re wondering, Clara isn’t her real name. We gave the fake name to Carissa Lynn because she was a cunt to Clara and Clara thought she might try to do something regarding her in school. Sarah was in art school and eventually went on to do something in Real Estate. No, she wasn’t 36. We made that up. She was gay, though, and after she moved in with her girlfriend we didn’t hear much from her. She stopped posting.
Is anyone else just completely confused by this paragraph right here? I am, I've read it three times now and I'm trying to figure out who she's talking about, exactly, from sentence to sentence.
Don’t you just love the Internet?
Oh honey, you have NO idea.
So, as part of my recovery I had a hard time with language. I still don’t type very fast. It’s part of the reason why I’ve never been a big chatter. The doctor told me to try reading children’s books. I chose Harry Potter. Clara read it with me. We were hooked. We searched for things about it and we stumbled upon Eight Ways From Sunday by jlh.
This is almost starting to sound like a plot hatched from the mind of Charles Dickens.
Jlh turned us onto Harry/Hermione so we found Portkey. It was later that we found out that Fiction Alley had other fics, lol. At this point I’d never even heard of or read anything about Cassie. Clara had started the Draco trilogy but frankly, at that point, it was actually too long for me to try to tackle. Some months went by before I began to post anything. Clara made these goofy icons and ‘fangirled’ me and so did Sarah and it was a game. I knew about it. Seriously. I’d like to have a better reason, but when it came down to it we were just fucking around.
Just fucking around?
It was then that I began writing Requital aka the shittiest fanfic ever written, but I’m proud of that fic for all of it’s errors because it was something I did on my own and that took a LOT of time back then. Clara thought she was helping me, and she was. She used my laptop and I’d use my husband’s (did I mention there are three computers in this house?)
No wonder she was able to sock puppet so effectively. I wonder if she had them all lined up together.
We were both newbies to the web 'community'. The term ‘fandom’ was completely new and we trolled and started flame wars on Portkey. It was funny at the time. We had no idea people took that shit so seriously.
*facepalm*
So, here’s where things went buggy. So there was this guy who liked my shitty fic until it got to the part where Cho has this weird sexual tension thing going on with Hermione. (Hey, that ship is really hot!) And he FREAKS OUT. Up until this point, he’s been sending me emails and they were all really nice and he was really nice so I answered. With my real name. Yeah, naïve much? Wait, it gets better. He sends me a bunch of religious texts on homosexuality from Amazon.com. I send them back. (He had a return PO).
Bizarre, but not entirely unlikely. There are nuts on the net. However...
Now, it’s at this point that I want to make something clear. I never, not once, claimed that I was afraid for my life or being stalked.
I'd like some confirmation on /that/ one.
Ever. He was weird and creepy, and invasive, but he never threatened me. It frankly wasn’t that deep. He was trying to convert me to his way of thinking, but it wasn’t a threat. His Internet name was fermatojam.
Ah, and fermatojam is born. Now this leads one to the quandary of which came first, the nutball or the sock puppet.
So the next part is the reason why I haven’t said anything this long. I’ve been waiting until Clara felt comfortable enough to say anything and until we had worked through our own friendship issues.
What?
The whole fermatojam thing was funny to me. Clara and I talked about it for hours and it was exhilarating.
Exactly, a real stalker! Catapulting you to fame and fortune on da intarwebz! This could be the big, time, baby, just me, my voice and ... ah... PROFIT!
So she did something without me knowing. She pretended to be him to get me going.
AHAHAHAHAHA! What a tangled web this is, a sock puppet sock puppeting. What is the world coming to?
It might seem inexcusable to you, but you have no idea what things were like for me and she did.
... do you really think we've bought this whole Clara isn't a sock puppet thing?
I basically was trapped in the house, was on more meds than a diabetic 85 year old, and being msscribe was empowering. At home I had to rely on others to take care of me and I wasn’t even able to fully care for my child at that point so the Internet was an escape.
This I can actually believe. And for once, I won't mock. It's kind sad, honestly. If she'd stuck with this excuse I might have actually had a smidgen of pity for her. But then, she went on...
I didn’t know anything about the politics of GT or Cassie Clare or anyone at that point, but she has gotten a little deeper into it and she did. Clara made the post on Cassie’s LJ. Clara logged onto GT. I only found this out a few months ago.
Sure. We believe you too.Not really.
When the bad penny report came out, I couldn’t believe it.
I'm sure... all your hard work suddenly dropped into the limelight just like that.
I was furious that they were editing screen caps to make it look like it was coming from my house, but Clio asked me a hard question and I eventually had to break down and admit it was possible.
It was possible that you were sock puppeting?
So I confronted her. It was a terrible time for it. She was very pregnant and needed my friendship (And frankly, that was never at risk) and so when she admitted it I said nothing except to maybe two or three people. And honestly it didn’t matter much anymore because I was dealing with my own drama as the husband and I had a serious discussion about separating on June 10th, 2006. Days before any of the other stuff was going down, in case you were wondering about my absence from the Internet. Priorities, people. And frankly, fandom hadn’t been a part of my life in years aside from some of the people in it.
Zzzzzzz. Eh, wot? Oh, sorry, fell asleep at the keys.
And the other sock puppets like Pottersginny? Killiganshope? I’m sad to say that this was also something she did. She used an anonymizer she had set up on the computers and told me that it was coming from the UK and she thought it was this guy at GT. It was coming from the UK but what I didn't know was that it was a different anon thingy. She screencapped and I went into a mild rage. I was completely wrong about that. I'm definitely sorry, but I really believed that shit. I really did.
I'm sure you do, believe it that is.
The Pottersginny thing hurt the most, I think, although I know why she did it, but that one hurt because she was upstairs in her room, I thought she was asleep, and here I was thinking I’m online with the worst troll of all. I understand why, though. At that point she confessed to just liking my reactions. And I’ll admit they were drama queen to the max. Looking back, I took that stuff waaay too seriously.
Kinda like the folks at Portkey were taking that shit waaaay too seriously?
But we talked through it because, you know, it’s the web, and here is someone who I love like my own kid. So in the end it didn’t matter. It was just the web.
Yeah, because people on the web aren't real people with real emotions, they're just toys to be played with by her and her sock puppets.
She never threatened to kill anyone. She was a newbie, like me, who trolled (like I did sometimes, too and so have ALL of you!) And five years later she is a mother to one with one on the way who hadn’t thought of any of this in years.
*wags her finger at you* And let that be a lesson to YOU kids, it's ok to hurt people and smear their names around as long as it's over the internet.
Also, I really didn’t want to admit that the grumbly chicks at GT were actually right. But they were. They caught on waaay before this and I remained loyal and stubborn. But seriously, maybe if they’d been nicer. You chicks thought that I made people loathe you? HA. Y’all did a pretty damn good job of that all on your own. But that’s another thing…
Yeah, because heaven knows you should be NICE to people who are lying about you and causing trouble for you. Turn the other cheek bastards so I can hit that one too!
When GT suspected Clara was sockpuppeting, they sent me the WORLDS nastiest letter. So of course, I was like, “Fuck you” and moved on. Did I think they were right? Hell, no. Was I wrong? Hell, yeah. Were they still really, really shitty about it? Yep.
Because they totally had no right to be angry about it. Totally.
So yeah, I had fun with them. I snarked at them. I created the community GT_Hidden room that, basically, my whole f-list knew about. I even had moced them on FW with another account (Can't remember it offhand). I’m serious. I posted about it. It was no secret, in spite of what some people claim. And the drag queen mocking? Yep, I also did that. And I wasn’t the only one who did it, either. But we made fun of their fic, and their uptightness, but mostly their fic. Which is, and will always be, really really bad. Sorry. But it is. Except the one Irina wrote. That was pretty damn good.
I almost felt sympathy before, now I'm afraid I must borrowtez's stamp of FAIL.
But at this point, I believed that fermatojam knew them all along (which Clara told me) and that they were harassing her. I love her, and the people close to me know how I am about people I love. They weren’t harassing her, so I’m sorry for that. I really, really am. I truly believed that this was the case.
I hate you all, you suck, die in a fire... but I'm sorry you weren't harassing my invisible friend. (WHY WEREN'T YOU DAMMIT.)
Now let me tell you what I didn’t do. I didn’t call any of their jobs to get them fired, even though I had most of their first and last names thanks to random people who decided to share with me (You all made a LOT of enemies way before I came along!).
Ok, we've now entered creepyville.
I never, not once, posted or made fun of their personal lives or stories they told about their families. I never, not once threatened them with their jobs and I know at least two of you are teachers, one of you living pretty damn close to me.
... this went beyond creepyville to downright fuckings scaryville. Can you say someone else was a stalker? I can.
I had dinner with your boss. How easy it would have been to step over that line. You think you're the only ones who know how to screencap? Do you know how easy it would have been for me to cross that line if I ever had the intention of doing that?
Wow... you gathered all this information up? I wonder when you planned to use it, perhaps things cooled off before you got the chance. (Raise your hands if you think she wouldn't have done it if she felt justified.)
I never took it out of the pretend world of the Internet or had ANY intention of ever doing that. I still don't. I wish they could say the same. I didn’t say I had taken GT down, in fact, I posted that they had imploded themselves under a locked post. I bought GT.org and thought I had bought GT.net, but that turned out to only be a domain waiting list purchase thing. Yeah, not so much with the bright, huh?
Well no, you're certainly not bright. You got caught, after all.
Someone DID send a letter to my job, and I WAS forced to resign, and because of the postmark I had a pretty good idea of who it was. I never posted about it publicly until I was asked to by a friend. So at that point, the gloves were off.
Does anyone believe this either? Srsly.
(To be continued, I need to sleep...)
Oh MsScribe... you cosmically stupid tart.
So I have permission to post this. Enjoy it because it'll be the last of it's kind.
Until the next time.
Although it doesn’t matter much anymore, Clara asked that I write this up.
Did she.
(Oh, didn't Charlotte tell you that she was real?
Have you told your psychiatrist about these voices in your head talking to you? They prescribe medication for that kind of thing, you know. Also, they have padded white cells and these very fashionable jackets that fit so snugly around you you can't stop hugging yourself.
Nanea used to talk to her on the phone. Also to me. We sound different. Also, you know, when I was hospitalized Nanea talked to her because I was incapable of it. )
Well of course you couldn't communicate with anyone yourself, at that time, you were busy having your fake crisis. That's why you used sock puppets, duh. We already know this.
Frankly, I don’t think this post is all that necessary but here it goes.
No, not necessary, except I'm sure being out of the limelight lately is killing you.
I was never going to post this and Clara didn't want me to but she has since changed her mind since this whole thing has put a strain (for her) on our friendship.
Understandable. After all, she's probably the little devil sitting on your left shoulder.
This whole Bad Penny thing has done me a lot of good, though. I’m sure this wasn’t their intention, but it has. I’ll explain later.
My nipples explode with anticipatory delight to hear that one.
In the beginning (In know, I know, a little Biblical but bear with me) I was in a car accident. I had a head injury.
You know, if this is actually true, it explains a lot right there.
The oldest was only 6 months old and so we got my neighbor’s younger cousin who had come to visit a few times to care for her (and me) during my recovery. Think I’m vying for sympathy here? Read back to me the number of posts I’ve made detailing this part of my past in the last 6 years. Like four, maybe?
Vying for sympathy? Not yet, but you've laid down a nice groundwork.
So yeah, I didn’t meet Clara on the web. We totally got online together and SarahKJames? Her college roommate (A funny chick who I’d love to get back in contact with) would come with her for weekends at my house. They’d do laundry. Oh, and in case you’re wondering, Clara isn’t her real name. We gave the fake name to Carissa Lynn because she was a cunt to Clara and Clara thought she might try to do something regarding her in school. Sarah was in art school and eventually went on to do something in Real Estate. No, she wasn’t 36. We made that up. She was gay, though, and after she moved in with her girlfriend we didn’t hear much from her. She stopped posting.
Is anyone else just completely confused by this paragraph right here? I am, I've read it three times now and I'm trying to figure out who she's talking about, exactly, from sentence to sentence.
Don’t you just love the Internet?
Oh honey, you have NO idea.
So, as part of my recovery I had a hard time with language. I still don’t type very fast. It’s part of the reason why I’ve never been a big chatter. The doctor told me to try reading children’s books. I chose Harry Potter. Clara read it with me. We were hooked. We searched for things about it and we stumbled upon Eight Ways From Sunday by jlh.
This is almost starting to sound like a plot hatched from the mind of Charles Dickens.
Jlh turned us onto Harry/Hermione so we found Portkey. It was later that we found out that Fiction Alley had other fics, lol. At this point I’d never even heard of or read anything about Cassie. Clara had started the Draco trilogy but frankly, at that point, it was actually too long for me to try to tackle. Some months went by before I began to post anything. Clara made these goofy icons and ‘fangirled’ me and so did Sarah and it was a game. I knew about it. Seriously. I’d like to have a better reason, but when it came down to it we were just fucking around.
Just fucking around?
It was then that I began writing Requital aka the shittiest fanfic ever written, but I’m proud of that fic for all of it’s errors because it was something I did on my own and that took a LOT of time back then. Clara thought she was helping me, and she was. She used my laptop and I’d use my husband’s (did I mention there are three computers in this house?)
No wonder she was able to sock puppet so effectively. I wonder if she had them all lined up together.
We were both newbies to the web 'community'. The term ‘fandom’ was completely new and we trolled and started flame wars on Portkey. It was funny at the time. We had no idea people took that shit so seriously.
*facepalm*
So, here’s where things went buggy. So there was this guy who liked my shitty fic until it got to the part where Cho has this weird sexual tension thing going on with Hermione. (Hey, that ship is really hot!) And he FREAKS OUT. Up until this point, he’s been sending me emails and they were all really nice and he was really nice so I answered. With my real name. Yeah, naïve much? Wait, it gets better. He sends me a bunch of religious texts on homosexuality from Amazon.com. I send them back. (He had a return PO).
Bizarre, but not entirely unlikely. There are nuts on the net. However...
Now, it’s at this point that I want to make something clear. I never, not once, claimed that I was afraid for my life or being stalked.
I'd like some confirmation on /that/ one.
Ever. He was weird and creepy, and invasive, but he never threatened me. It frankly wasn’t that deep. He was trying to convert me to his way of thinking, but it wasn’t a threat. His Internet name was fermatojam.
Ah, and fermatojam is born. Now this leads one to the quandary of which came first, the nutball or the sock puppet.
So the next part is the reason why I haven’t said anything this long. I’ve been waiting until Clara felt comfortable enough to say anything and until we had worked through our own friendship issues.
What?
The whole fermatojam thing was funny to me. Clara and I talked about it for hours and it was exhilarating.
Exactly, a real stalker! Catapulting you to fame and fortune on da intarwebz! This could be the big, time, baby, just me, my voice and ... ah... PROFIT!
So she did something without me knowing. She pretended to be him to get me going.
AHAHAHAHAHA! What a tangled web this is, a sock puppet sock puppeting. What is the world coming to?
It might seem inexcusable to you, but you have no idea what things were like for me and she did.
... do you really think we've bought this whole Clara isn't a sock puppet thing?
I basically was trapped in the house, was on more meds than a diabetic 85 year old, and being msscribe was empowering. At home I had to rely on others to take care of me and I wasn’t even able to fully care for my child at that point so the Internet was an escape.
This I can actually believe. And for once, I won't mock. It's kind sad, honestly. If she'd stuck with this excuse I might have actually had a smidgen of pity for her. But then, she went on...
I didn’t know anything about the politics of GT or Cassie Clare or anyone at that point, but she has gotten a little deeper into it and she did. Clara made the post on Cassie’s LJ. Clara logged onto GT. I only found this out a few months ago.
Sure. We believe you too.
When the bad penny report came out, I couldn’t believe it.
I'm sure... all your hard work suddenly dropped into the limelight just like that.
I was furious that they were editing screen caps to make it look like it was coming from my house, but Clio asked me a hard question and I eventually had to break down and admit it was possible.
It was possible that you were sock puppeting?
So I confronted her. It was a terrible time for it. She was very pregnant and needed my friendship (And frankly, that was never at risk) and so when she admitted it I said nothing except to maybe two or three people. And honestly it didn’t matter much anymore because I was dealing with my own drama as the husband and I had a serious discussion about separating on June 10th, 2006. Days before any of the other stuff was going down, in case you were wondering about my absence from the Internet. Priorities, people. And frankly, fandom hadn’t been a part of my life in years aside from some of the people in it.
Zzzzzzz. Eh, wot? Oh, sorry, fell asleep at the keys.
And the other sock puppets like Pottersginny? Killiganshope? I’m sad to say that this was also something she did. She used an anonymizer she had set up on the computers and told me that it was coming from the UK and she thought it was this guy at GT. It was coming from the UK but what I didn't know was that it was a different anon thingy. She screencapped and I went into a mild rage. I was completely wrong about that. I'm definitely sorry, but I really believed that shit. I really did.
I'm sure you do, believe it that is.
The Pottersginny thing hurt the most, I think, although I know why she did it, but that one hurt because she was upstairs in her room, I thought she was asleep, and here I was thinking I’m online with the worst troll of all. I understand why, though. At that point she confessed to just liking my reactions. And I’ll admit they were drama queen to the max. Looking back, I took that stuff waaay too seriously.
Kinda like the folks at Portkey were taking that shit waaaay too seriously?
But we talked through it because, you know, it’s the web, and here is someone who I love like my own kid. So in the end it didn’t matter. It was just the web.
Yeah, because people on the web aren't real people with real emotions, they're just toys to be played with by her and her sock puppets.
She never threatened to kill anyone. She was a newbie, like me, who trolled (like I did sometimes, too and so have ALL of you!) And five years later she is a mother to one with one on the way who hadn’t thought of any of this in years.
*wags her finger at you* And let that be a lesson to YOU kids, it's ok to hurt people and smear their names around as long as it's over the internet.
Also, I really didn’t want to admit that the grumbly chicks at GT were actually right. But they were. They caught on waaay before this and I remained loyal and stubborn. But seriously, maybe if they’d been nicer. You chicks thought that I made people loathe you? HA. Y’all did a pretty damn good job of that all on your own. But that’s another thing…
Yeah, because heaven knows you should be NICE to people who are lying about you and causing trouble for you. Turn the other cheek bastards so I can hit that one too!
When GT suspected Clara was sockpuppeting, they sent me the WORLDS nastiest letter. So of course, I was like, “Fuck you” and moved on. Did I think they were right? Hell, no. Was I wrong? Hell, yeah. Were they still really, really shitty about it? Yep.
Because they totally had no right to be angry about it. Totally.
So yeah, I had fun with them. I snarked at them. I created the community GT_Hidden room that, basically, my whole f-list knew about. I even had moced them on FW with another account (Can't remember it offhand). I’m serious. I posted about it. It was no secret, in spite of what some people claim. And the drag queen mocking? Yep, I also did that. And I wasn’t the only one who did it, either. But we made fun of their fic, and their uptightness, but mostly their fic. Which is, and will always be, really really bad. Sorry. But it is. Except the one Irina wrote. That was pretty damn good.
I almost felt sympathy before, now I'm afraid I must borrow
tez's stamp of FAIL. But at this point, I believed that fermatojam knew them all along (which Clara told me) and that they were harassing her. I love her, and the people close to me know how I am about people I love. They weren’t harassing her, so I’m sorry for that. I really, really am. I truly believed that this was the case.
I hate you all, you suck, die in a fire... but I'm sorry you weren't harassing my invisible friend. (WHY WEREN'T YOU DAMMIT.)
Now let me tell you what I didn’t do. I didn’t call any of their jobs to get them fired, even though I had most of their first and last names thanks to random people who decided to share with me (You all made a LOT of enemies way before I came along!).
Ok, we've now entered creepyville.
I never, not once, posted or made fun of their personal lives or stories they told about their families. I never, not once threatened them with their jobs and I know at least two of you are teachers, one of you living pretty damn close to me.
... this went beyond creepyville to downright fuckings scaryville. Can you say someone else was a stalker? I can.
I had dinner with your boss. How easy it would have been to step over that line. You think you're the only ones who know how to screencap? Do you know how easy it would have been for me to cross that line if I ever had the intention of doing that?
Wow... you gathered all this information up? I wonder when you planned to use it, perhaps things cooled off before you got the chance. (Raise your hands if you think she wouldn't have done it if she felt justified.)
I never took it out of the pretend world of the Internet or had ANY intention of ever doing that. I still don't. I wish they could say the same. I didn’t say I had taken GT down, in fact, I posted that they had imploded themselves under a locked post. I bought GT.org and thought I had bought GT.net, but that turned out to only be a domain waiting list purchase thing. Yeah, not so much with the bright, huh?
Well no, you're certainly not bright. You got caught, after all.
Someone DID send a letter to my job, and I WAS forced to resign, and because of the postmark I had a pretty good idea of who it was. I never posted about it publicly until I was asked to by a friend. So at that point, the gloves were off.
Does anyone believe this either? Srsly.
(To be continued, I need to sleep...)
