Fandom Wank BNF Deathmatch's Journal

11:37pm: Fight Card Seven
Pool A

renjenri vs. ivyblossom

Pool B

amandatwop vs. smo

Pool C.

psychoaddict vs. gairid

Pool D

mirabellawotr vs. rann

We've noticed that some of you have been losing interest. Vote anyway, you lazy bastards.

11:26pm: Results of Fight Card Six
Pool A.

dreagonfli vs. ereshkigal --- won by dreagonfli

Pool B.

biichan vs. veuki --- won by veuki

Pool C.

cesare vs. eljuno --- won by cesare

Pool D.

sorchar vs. zorrorojo --- won by sorchar

The next card will be up shortly.

fw_deathmatch would like to remind zorrorojo that we only count the votes.

oulangi received some votes too.

12:21am: Fight Card Six
Pool A.

dreagonfli vs. ereshkigal

Pool B.

biichan vs. veuki

Pool C.

cesare vs. eljuno

Pool D.

sorchar vs. zorrorojo

Remember we don't like block votes. We like snark, Batman mpreg and Pinot Grigio.

And to a Certain Person: vote early means early after that fight card is put up. However, please continue with your efforts, dear. You amuse us.

ETA: We apologize profoundly to ereshkigal for getting hir name wrong. We have the utmost respect for ereshkigal; in fact, at least one of us will be voting for hir.

11:37pm: Results of Fight Card Five
Pool A

musette vs telesilla --- won by telesilla

Pool B

eyebrowofdoom vs bnfshavemorefun --- won by eyebrowofdoom

Pool C

iczer6 vs raisedbyhyenas --- won by raisedbyhyenas

Pool D

pyratejenni vs anatsuno --- won by anatsuno

The new fight card will be up soon.

12:50am: Fight Card Five
Pool A

musette vs telesilla

Pool B

eyebrowofdoom vs bnfshavemorefun

Pool C

iczer6 vs raisedbyhyenas

Pool D

pyratejenni vs anatsuno

Vote early, vote cleverly and bring the fucking snark instead of the block votes.

12:40am: Request and Fight Card Four Results
We at fw_deathmatch Inc. want to make this fun and wanky for all. Including ourselves. We don't like giving up time we could have spent combing the net for more wank, reading our favorite Mpreg Batman fic, waxing our bikini area, or hanging out with our crack team of hardened drinkers in order to count your block votes.

Furthermore, we at fw_deathmatch Inc. have been made aware that the JF Goddess seems to view block voting as something very like server abuse and let me tell you those two words send chills through to our very lack of souls. We remember what it was like when we had to make do with Blurty or, even worse, with Crazylife before we were given a home here at JournalFen.

Also, the block voting made a difference in only one of the four matches.

Finally, although we were at first amused by the block voting, it very quickly became a lot like someone else's tiresome crying child. The lurkers support us in email on this one.

We could change policy here. Or we could ask you all to act like reasonable adults. Or we could ask that you all try to go for quality and humor in your voting over quantity.

We chose a mortal life to go with the third option for now. Don't make us get out the jackboots.

You won't like the jackboots.


Pool A

esorlehcar vs misswindy --- Won by esorlehcar

Pool B

kissaki vs resmiranda --- Won by resmiranda

Pool C

cmikhailovic vs sajasma --- Won by cmikhailovic

Pool D

katemonkey vs kyuuketsukirui ---Won by kyuuketsukirui

The next fight card will be up shortly.

2:47pm: Here's how it's going to work from now on
People have made suggestions which we have listened to and then done what we were going to do anyway.

Anything goes in fight card four. However the polls might close a little earlier tonight because we have bedtimes and counting this card is going to suck. Hard.

In the future any mass block of votes will be counted as one vote unless you give us a realistic line count. Not only do we have bedtimes but we have lives as well. Not to mention that as jokes go, mass voting has gotten old. Don't make us point and laugh at you as others are already doing.

No, we will not pull names out of the match. Ask your minions to vote against you if you want out because you either emerge victorious or you go out feet first. Suck it up.

One person suggested that every vote should have an explanation, however lame, for why the vote is being cast. While we are not going to bother making this a rule, we would very much like to see people making an effort. It can be snarky or sweet or surreal; we here at fw_deathmatch Inc. are very fond of the surreal. We're also fond of tentacle porn, badfic in any fandom although bad HP fic has a special place in our black heart(s), wing fic, tinhat canon fic and RPS involving real slashers. And we like a nice Pinot Grigio with our Salad Nicoise.

Finally, if you look at fw_deathmatch, throw your hands up in the air and grumpily protest that it's all a big popularity contest, congratulate yourself on your keen understanding of the world around you.

12:27am: Fight Card Four
Pool A

esorlehcar vs misswindy

Pool B

kissaki vs resmiranda

Pool C

cmikhailovic vs sajasma

Pool D

katemonkey vs kyuuketsukirui

You know the drill. Username, snark, no cheating. Oh wait; cheating is encouraged.

Have at.

12:16am: Fight Card Three Results
Pool A

lulinda vs mynxkittie --- lulinda wins

Pool B

sagralisse vs backfromspace --- backfromspace wins

Pool C

nevadafighter vs workingslacker --- nevadafighter wins

Pool D

funkyhelix vs. hugsnkisses --- hugsnkisses wins by the largest margin


This round saw some wanky snark, although we think you could do better. For those who are wondering and not counting votes, the results were the same even before the rush of sockpuppets there at the end.


Fight Card Four up shortly

12:26am: Fight Card Three
Pool A

lulinda vs mynxkittie

Pool B

sagralisse vs backfromspace

Pool C

nevadafighter vs workingslacker

Pool D

funkyhelix vs. hugsnkisses

Once more, use the username in your vote.

Amuse the masses. Amaze your friends. Bring the snark. Vote early, often and anonymously.

12:14am: Winners for Fight Card Two
Fight Card Two:


Pool A

lasayla vs. singe -- Won by singe

Pool B

rebeccasama vs. cimorene111 -- Won by cimorene111

Pool C

versaphile vs. morganya -- Won by versaphile

Pool D

embitca vs. wizzard -- Won by wizzard in the closest match.

Fight Card Three coming soon

12:50am: Fight Card Two
Fight Card Two:


Pool A

lasayla vs. singe

Pool B

rebeccasama vs. cimorene111

Pool C

versaphile vs. morganya

Pool D

embitca vs. wizzard

While the mods of the deathmatch would like you to think that they are all powerful, they aren't. They don't know the actual RL names and/or pet names of all of the contestants so please use the user name somewhere in your vote.

Now go out there and vote and crush your enemies and hear the lamentations of their women. Or you know, not.

12:11am: Match Results!
The results of the first match are as follows:

Pool A:

the_squid vs. babyjesus -- Won by the_squid. This also takes the prize for best reasons to vote for one or the other.

Pool B:

tempslut vs. ipomoea -- Won by ipomoea

Pool C:

phosfate vs. uniquesnowflake -- Won by phosfate

Pool D:

arkane156 vs. heyoka -- Won by arkane156 in the closest vote of this match.

12:30pm: match ups
Just to clarify, aside from the obvious sock vs. sock match, the matchups were chosen using an obscure Etruscan divination system in which cling-film wrapped priestess flung sacred donuts in front of divine crazed weasels.

In other words, it was totally random. Don't blame me if you're up against someone better than you.

2:33am: Let the Games Begin!
Pool A
babyjesus vs. the_squid

Pool B
tempslut vs. ipomoea

Pool C
phosfate vs. uniquesnowflake

Pool D
arkane156 vs. heyoka

Voting will last for two days. You may vote anonymously or not. Socks may vote.