ingrid

And yet another offer for fics for Japan.

This one is good as the fics are 'bought' outright by purchasing a "Help Japan" V-gift from the LJ gifting page for $2.99 each.

I'm offering three H/W ficlets (Victorian only) in this thread here.

Send a Help Japan v-gift to my profile and the fic is yours, sans any bidding.

I'm now following George Michael and Boy George on Twitter. This makes me ridiculously happy.

Gah, busy day today. Not much time to write, but ... I'm going to try later.

Speaking of writing, I'm offering up a fic for Help Japan on LJ. (And from the news they really need every cent.)

My offer thread is here. H/W, Gaeta/Dee, King's Speech, Nick shows and Twin Peaks.

Be sure to troll the rest of the post for other writers -- there are tons of good ones that still aren't claimed.

Here is my Help Japan auction post. Below is what I'm offering at this entry right here

~*~

You can see things I've created at: http://archiveofourown.org/users/ingridmatthews

http://www.fanfiction.net/u/255057/ingrid_matthews

I am offering: A fic of at least a 1,000 words, for your specified prompt.

Fandoms (if appropriate): Sherlock Holmes (Victorian, Holmes/Watson only, NO BBC), iCarly (any), VicTorious (any), Big Time Rush (any) The King's Speech (Bertie/Elizabeth only), BSG 2003 (Gaeta/Dee only), Twin Peaks (Albert/Dale only).

Additional Info: I've been involved in numerous charity auctions and I've completed and delivered all my fic. Please note that I don't write infidelity, extreme angst/kink (scat/blood/snuff/beastiality) or death fic. My strengths are hurt/comfort, schmoop and fluff. I will always do my best to deliver a fic that fills the prompt and my obligation to the winner here will come first.

Starting Bid (in USD): $5.00

~*~

Again, please note again that I've done this a few times before and I've always delivered my fics because my OCD guilt thing will make you come first. *grin*

Please bid on me here if you wish.

Recipe for what I'm cooking tonite. It's a one-skillet, five ingredient, twenty minute recipe.

( Chicken Scarpiello )

*tucks napkin*

The New BBC "Modern" Sherlock Holmes Press releases.

All I can say is .... EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

And that's one gorgeous Sherlock, OMG.

Again, EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!

Prompt post for the Tenth Porn Battle closes in a couple of hours. Quick, go leave prompts!!!! (Holmes/Watson prompts, hint, hint.)

fail_fandomanon interests me. Fascinating, if occasionally brutal and trolly, reading.

From Beginnings End. Rizzoli & Isles smut. ♥

Sporting Instinct. H/W HOT, HOT SMUT.

Beds Are Burning. Albert/Cooper smut! \o/ (Sequel to my fic by the fabulous amatara.

~*~

LJ is purging journals! Without any entries! OHNOES!

*eyeroll*

See, this is why I wait a good 48-72 hours before I get annoyed by anything LJ announces. If they had a beta-reader for their announcements, 99% of LJ wank would be avoided.

Now I want that "OHNOEZ!" animated icon.

Yes, I know. BUT it really annoys me that there's no Kelly Wainwright fic in this fandom. Not even a little. So, I fill a square on my Bingo Card and fill a niche. It's all good.

Title: Assistant's Day
Fandom: Big Time Rush
Rating: PG
Genre: Schmoop, Humor, Romance
Words: 2,141
Pairing: Kelly/Gustavo
Summary: For the "Anniversary' square on the Schmoop Bingo card. It's been five years as Gustavo's assistant and Kelly is in for a few surprises.

( not as improbable as you might think )

Um, just saw a commercial for a new series on TNT called Rizzoli & Isles.

EXCUSE ME, WHERE IS THAT FANDOM BUS? THERE IS A SLASHY DESTINATION TO BE HAD HERE.

I mean, they're in bed together - platonically, cough - in the ad! COME ON.

A detective, a medical examiner who are insanely hot and THEY FIGHT CRIME? Yeah, I need to jump on this bad boy right away, omg.

Or at least watch it, LOL. *prays it doesn't suck*

I had the stylist cut off most of my hair today.

I LOVE IT.

My girlfriend is all D:

*sadface* It was always in a ponytail anyway.

Can't win 'em all.

Stuff I'm kinda in love with at the moment...

- Pandora's Desktop ap over the AIR Adobe platform. My browser doesn't crash and the music keeps coming. WORTH EVERY PENNY OF THAT SUBSCRIPTION. I've found so many new artists through Pandora. (EEE - "Halo" by Beyonce is on!)

- Cleaning my spare room has discovered me a new clean keyboard for my desktop and the power source for my external hard drives that I thought died, but the plug wasn't working. \o/

- amatara's gonna write me a continuation for my Twin Peaks, Albert/Cooper fic. A SMUTTY ONE.

- While I love Flo from Progressive forever, I also have a crush on Darrell (Mr Rollback) from Wal-Mart. I couldn't find the ice cream rollback commercial but this one is cute too: ( catsup! )

- The Kissing, Cuddling, Nuzzling, Wrap-You-In-My-Clothes fic prompt meme. And not only because I got two fills for one of my SH cuddle prompts. OKAY, MAYBEE THIS HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH IT.

- The The BSG Porn Battle that if I don't write some Gaeta/Dee for, I suck.

- The Shakespeare Kink Meme! EEEEE!

- I'm enjoying this Cat/Jade girlslash fic even if it's one-sided and grumpy, it's adorable, like Jade herself.

- SPAIN WON! And the octopus was right again. Weird.

- My icon up there. Because it makes me laugh.

♥ all you guize!

Title: Wait For You
Fandom: Twin Peaks
Rating: PG
Genre: Angst
Pairing: Cooper/Rosenfeld
Summary: After Leland Palmer's demise, Albert and Cooper reunite.
A/N: For amatara as well as the Schmoop Bingo Prompt: Reunion.

( out in the cold )

C&P FOR A FRIEND (Feel free to pass around.)

Late last year, my very lively mom - some of you have met her and y'all know what I mean - developed rapidly accelerating degenerative arthritis in her spine which caused her to have a pinched nerve. This has resulted in about an 80% loss of mobility for her. Since she has little access to health insurance, applying for disability and seeking adequate medical care has been extremely slow going and she is largely confined to her home (since she can no longer drive). She's been out of work since February 2010, when she no longer was able to stand or sit for any length of time.

Why am I telling you guys this? She has entered a South Florida contest to get a free kitchen makeover from Panda Kitchens, in collaboration with Whole Foods. There aren't a lot of entries, but basically the way she would win is by getting a lot of votes. She would use the makeover prize to be able to remodel her kitchen for greater accessibility for her physical disabilities. They're living off one income at this time and can't pay for this themselves at all.

So if y'all could do me the favor of:

Voting For My Mom Here!

I would really appreciate it. Click on CARY DIAZ's story to see her current kitchen (it's pretty crappy and the counters are VERY high, meaning she can't access them in her chair) and vote for it. It literally takes a second - you do not have to register or anything. You can vote every day, and if possible, please post this on your LJ, Twitter, and/or any other avenue you would like.

Leaving this open to the public. Feel free to point people to this entry and/or cutting and pasting its contents. Thank you :)"

A fannish to-do list (includes "VicTorious", "BSG", "Twin Peaks" and of course, SH):

- Write Andre/Tori fic that is better than what's found in FF.N's Andre/Tori Community. (And yes, I did read "Why Are You So Buff?" anyway. BECAUSE I'M DESPERATE.)

- Write Cat/Jade fic because they would be adorable together (and the porn would be *scorching*). See the background singers in this video. The red-haired girl is Cat, the dark-haired wicked gal who is smearing frog guts into the singer's shirt is Jade. \o/ HAWT.

- I just realized that if Beck moves to the Sahara, many of my wishes might come true. *narrows eyes at Beck*

- Work on my schmoop_bingo card *and* fulfill some owed fic obligations for amatara and certain Gaetafic pals. Might be able to work some VicTorious and iCarly fic in there as well. MULTI-TASKING!

- Finish some of my Sherlock Holmes self-imposed obligations. Poor Holmes is still damaged and waiting to be sent away to the 'home' by Mycroft, darn it.

And note, this is all without joining *any* Big Bangs or Remixes or charity auctions. WTF is WRONG with me?

Title: The Final Straw
Rating R (for sexual situations)
Words: 1,987
Pairing/Characters: Holmes/Watson, Mrs. Hudson, Yardies, Gladstone
Summary: For this prompt "Mrs Hudson finally loses it and chucks Holmes and Watson out. Where do they go? What do they do? Does Watson skin Holmes for making him lose his home? How do they make it up to her and get back to their rightful places is 221B?"

( a conflagration of unfortunate events )

Comments keep Gladstone in dog biscuits! Thanks!

There's a moth in the house.

That keeps trying to land in my wine.

BAD MOTH! NO! BAD! GO FIND A COAT TO EAT!

~*~

I'm very happy today. I have no idea why.

~*~

Someone reviewed my Watson Torture fic on FFN and asked if I'd write some InnocentBottom!Watson in exchange for eternal love.

Dude. I will write that for momentary disdain. Eternal loathing. I will write that for nothing at all.

Also, there's not enough porn in my fandom to devour on a daily basis. This has never happened to me before. I read old favorites and look forward to the continuation of the fic where Watson is such a shitty doctor he declares Holmes dead and lets him be buried alive.

CrappyDoctor!Watson. WHAT'S NOT TO LOVE?

~*~

A new Porn Battle is coming. I'm going to be ready with prompts this time, I swear!

Unless I'm already late. *scratches head*

This go-round I'm going for Drumline and Miss Congeniality prompts.

Because the Goddess Slashia is VERY UNHAPPY so little slash exists for these movies.

~*~

I owe comments. I owe fic. There are a million and one things I want to write.

As soon as this moth is waved out the window.

Gah, it's 102 degrees outside. MY BEAUTY, SHE IS MELTING! *pouty face of needy*

Anyway, here's some stuff to read while lazing away under the AC (or heater for those of you lounging in the southern part of the globe):

Cold Comfort by amatara. Twin Peaks. Some Albert/Cooper h/c and yes I beta'd it. And yes, it's awesome.

Alliances by sparkle_free is finished! Oh, Holmes. \o/

No one can tell me this isn't an intentional badfic: My Immortal. Harry Potter, Draco/OFC and omg SO FREAKIN' FUNNY. "WARNING: SUM OF DIS CHAPTA IS XTREMLY SCRAY. VIOWER EXCRETION ADVISD." Indeed.

Young Holmes by pennies_4_eyes. I might have posted this already. I don't care. Why isn't Older!Watson jumping that? WITH IMPUNITY? Come on, someone, write me this!

I skipped my sick Holmes torture fic for the weekend and wrote The House Call which is some good ol' Watson Torture with Holmes Comforting & Protecting instead. Now, back to beating on Holmes.

Making Up For Lost Time by kate_lear. Virgin!Holmes lets Watson work that magic on him. This hits my kinks hard, especially that position. My fave!

There Was No Longer Any Reason To Fear by echoindarkness. Post-Hiatus reunion boink. With tears. Yes, I'm a weenie like that.

My friend who was supposed to get stents got a better report from the 'dye scope' or whatever that is and while she has narrowing of the arteries, you need a 70% blockage to get a stent so she's off the hook for now.

Still, they stuck the scope up her arm (her right arm, of course) and she can't do anything for a few days. I brought over a big bowl of whole wheat spaghetti and turkey meatballs with berries for dessert. Monday, we'll go over and barbecue and all will be well.

Tomorrow we're getting a swim day at another friend's house in his pool and Sunday ... not sure yet.

Good news, perclexed has been given some breathing room by all you awesome folks, which is great. Thank you all for that! She's a great person, I've known her for the past eight years and if anyone deserves a hand up, it's her.

I'm using my Breha - Leia's adoptive mama - icon here at Dreamwidth. Because I didn't know her name before I got it and because she's awesome.

Also, folks who voted Dee from BSG as one of the most disappointing female characters in Sci-Fi, fuck you. *I* loved her, still do, and love the actress who played her. You fill me full of haterade, but not for her. :(

On December 22nd 2009, perclexed lost her home and most of her possessions in a house fire. She was homeless over Christmas. Thankfully the Red Cross were able to find her a hotel, but it didn't lessen the devastation of the event. After several stressful weeks and days, she managed to find an affordable apartment, only for her job to end six weeks later. She thought she'd be able to go back to it; this did not happen.

She's been unemployed ever since. She has a meeting with her former employer scheduled for tomorrow (Friday), but she half-expects him to cancel. Apparently he's prone to it. While he dithers, she exists in a state of financial crisis; her rent is due and her bank account is overdrawn and about to be closed, her bills are going unpaid. And, oh yeah, she has to eat, too.

I've watched her sell and sell and sell what few possessions she has left in order to buy herself more time. She's a knitter; she's sold her equipment, what wasn't ruined in the fire, and she still has things for sale here, if you'd care to take a look.

Make no mistake, this appeal is not a solution to her problems. This is about buying perclexed some time, another month to be exact, and fandom taking care of its own. perclexed is a long-time fangirl; I've known her since the early days of Smallville. She's helped other fangirls when they needed it; I trusted her with my money during that school library appeal a few years back and I had no cause to regret it. She's a wonderful woman, she's terrifically strong, but everybody has their limit.

The Mission:

1. The immediate target is $550 to cover her rent; anything over that is gravy. It would would be fantastic if we could get her overdraft fees paid off, too.

2. It will take $2000 to buy her that extra month of relative peace.

I think the usual way to do this is to set up some kind of auction or arrange all the money raised to go forward as one big gift, but we don't have time. If you can give anything at all, please send it direct to perclexed ...

perclexed at gmail dot com (Paypal email addy)

** If you cannot donate, please consider boosting the signal. Thank you guys for your time.

Dear LJ:

Gimme my comments and tracked thread replies. GIMME THEM!

*holds you upside down and shakes you*

How will I know when my favorite meme fics (*coughAlliances*cough) are updated? I can't F5 all day you bastard!

Hate,
Me

PS: I lied about the F5 thing, but still ...

The Last Airbender reviews are making me LOL even though I'm bummed that such an incredible animated series was butchered in so many sorrowful ways. The creators and artists of the original should have never been tainted by this monstrosity, especially Mako

In other awful movie news, what is it about Kevin James that makes me want to see all his movies? I want to see "Grown Ups" so badly. I mean, "Paul Blart: Mall Cop" should have cured me of this little 'problem' but NO. Every time I see him in a trailer my jaw slackens, I guffaw stupidly and take my wallet out to buy a ticket.

Maybe he's a master hypnotist? A demon of some kind? Or I have a serious problem.

Okay, now to work on Schmoop Bingo before getting ready for the ball game tonight. Sproglet already has his hat and glove on. THAT'S MY BOY.

damned_colonial purchased me some paid time on my Dreamwidth account which means I got my network back - and my icons - which pleases me greatly. :D :D :D THANK YOU!

I'm having quite the time with my kinkmeme torture fill as it's now become dub-con (non-con?) and completely messed up before my very eyes. LOL, that's what writing on the fly does, you throw that crazy spaghetti out there and see if it sticks. It's interesting as an improvised piece but as a finished work it would need the hell edited out of it or maybe rethought entirely. But what good is a kinkmeme if you can't go over-the-top?

There goes my Fluff Master rep, tho'. Heh, heh, heh.

Man, I'm hungry. Sushi is calling to me.