Just Jude - Danger, Danger, Will Robinson! [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Jude

[ website | Disclaimer ]
[ userinfo | jf userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

Danger, Danger, Will Robinson! [Jun. 20th, 2006|01:10 pm]
Previous Entry Add to Memories Tell a Friend Next Entry
[Current Mood |Frustrated, like, OMG!]

[public to Est members]

I am going to KILL him.

I have just figured out what my boyfriend's plan is. It wasn't hard. He more or less told me himself. But the full awfulness of it didn't quite sink in until I put down the phone.

So now I have to kill him. It's either that or DIE in a horrible explosion once I get to St. Denis. Five days. Even worse, five nights. Fuck. Or no fucking, to be precise.

Also, an advance warning to any paps - not that they can see this, thank fuck - if I see you, I will BITE. I just hope someone in NYC will bail me out if I get arrested.

LinkLeave a comment

Comments:
[User Picture]
From:[info]est_cumming
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 03:29 am
(Link)
I'm always good for bail, mate!

What on earth has your knickers in such a twist, though? The Establishment doesn't allow explosions, I'm sure. I'm on probation for simply sharing out the whips last time.
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 03:46 am
(Link)
Good. I'll keep your number handy for that "one allowed phonecall".

As for my knickers, no, they are not twisted. They are locked and bolted. Sort of. Aaaaaargh! I'm not allowed to come.

And probation? I didn't hear about this? You been a bad boy? Silly question... I mean, have you been badder than usual?
[User Picture]
From:[info]ewan_mcgregor
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 03:57 am
(Link)
You know you love it.
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 04:49 am
(Link)
...No, I don't!

...okay, I do.



I'm still allowed to whine about though, aren't I?

[User Picture]
From:[info]ewan_mcgregor
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 04:57 am
(Link)
Of course you are. Watching your frustration is part of the fun. *grins*
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 06:43 am
(Link)
Well, I'm glad someone's having some. Fun, that is. This is torture, you evil bastard.

Love you.
[User Picture]
From:[info]rachelweisz
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 09:00 pm
(Link)
Oh Ewan, you're an evil, evil man. What have you been doing to lovely Jude while I've been away? And more importantly, can I watch next time?!
[User Picture]
From:[info]ewan_mcgregor
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 09:38 pm
(Link)
Well, I've been mostly torturing him over the phone, so I haven't got to watch it myself. I keep thinking we need some sort of video phone and then not doing anything about it.

Will you be at the island?
[User Picture]
From:[info]rachelweisz
Date:June 21st, 2006 - 07:53 pm
(Link)
Unfortunately I won't be there, sweetie, as I'm just back from my honeymoon! Have sex on the beach for me, and tell me all about it when you get back. Or even demonstrate.
[User Picture]
From:[info]est_cumming
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 04:04 am
(Link)
Ah, the halcyon days of having a proper lover who might do these kinds of things...

I'm afraid I was drunk and disorderly on the island last year. One's allowed to be disorderly but not drunk, or drunk, but not disorderly, but not both. It's like the Red Queen.
[User Picture]
From:[info]jonnyleemiller
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 03:35 am
(Link)
Killing boyfriend = depriving generations of Ewan. Is it really that bad?

And you exploding doesn't sound any better. Rather messy. Not to mention eliminating the possibility of a Sky Captain sequel.
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 03:56 am
(Link)
Yes it is that bad. He's teasing me! Ringing me up and getting me hot under the collar, steaming and then... just when the kettle's about to boil, bang, that's it, no cup of tea. Damn. I'm getting dirty texts, wicked emails and some downright filthy phonecalls and all it does is get me into a right state. With no relief in sight until Friday.

I should have listened to you, Jonny. The man is evil.
[User Picture]
From:[info]jonnyleemiller
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 04:15 am
(Link)
What?! Shame on him, being so cruel to his boyfriend. You mean, he's telling you wicked things, like how he's going to shag your brains out, in great detail, of course, and then not letting you wank or anything?
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 05:58 am
(Link)
Oh no, Jonny! Not you too?!

What did I ever do to deserve such cruel, cruel friends and lovers? Eh? Tell me!

...no, wait. On second thoughts, telling me what I've done to deserve it could take a while...

From:damonalbarn
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 03:38 am
(Link)
I think killing him might put even more of a damper on your sex life.
[User Picture]
From:[info]ewan_mcgregor
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 03:45 am
(Link)
What an eminently sensible reply. ;)
From:damonalbarn
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 03:58 am
(Link)
Still, if I were you, I'd invest in some body armour or something.
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 04:13 am
(Link)
Well, I don't know. It might be a service to mankind. If he keeps teasing me until Friday, I think the resulting explosion might take out half the island and a good portion of the world's kinky elite along with it. And what would we do then?



Actually, I should stop saying 'explosion'. It's putting some grotesque images in my head. I should say... spontaneous combustion instead. I am going to just catch on fire from the inside out, or from the balls up, and just burn to death.

How are you?
From:damonalbarn
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 04:16 am
(Link)
Now I have grotesque images in my head. Thanks ever so much. I think I may opt to be on the OTHER side of the island from you two.

I'm not unwell. I hope you're doing fine, all potential combustion aside.
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 04:32 am
(Link)
Haha, you're welcome! (Sorry...)

So you're coming to the party? That's fantastic news. I haven't seen you in an age. You should be able to recognise me... at this rate, I'll be dressed as Jerry Lee Lewis. Goodness, gracious!
From:damonalbarn
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 04:34 am
(Link)
It's a good thing for me I don't sleep much or I'd be worried about nightmares.

Oh yes, I've been threatened with various forms of bodily harm if I don't show up. Jerry Lee Lewis? Do I want to know who Ewan is going as?
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 04:55 am
(Link)
*tsk* Kids today... If that had been an Oasis reference I bet you would have got it, and don't deny it. Haha. </i>Don't kill me!</i>

You shake my nerves and you rattle my brain
Too much love drives a man insane
You broke my will, but what a thrill
Goodness, gracious, great balls of fire

Ewan's going as a Jedi. I'm going to be a Sith. We had a stand up bitch fight over who was going to be wearing slinky sexy black and who was wearing prissy white, and he won.


From:damonalbarn
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 05:08 am
(Link)
Oh right. I'm getting old and senile, you know. Oh, fuck you. I should have known someone would make a crack like that.

Ewan as a Jedi, imagine that. Keep count of how many people ask to see your "lightsabres."
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 06:27 am
(Link)
Yeah, we're kind of setting ourselves up for it, aren't we? groan... Still, I've heard cornier pick up lines. Ewan should be used to it by now.
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 06:29 am
(Link)
And anyway, you haven't told me who (or what!) you're going as yet.
From:damonalbarn
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 06:34 am
(Link)
I can't decide whether to keep it a secret or not. But then, it's not all that clever of an idea. I've got myself a brown suit and tie and a pair of specs... I'm going as my secret identity.

Although I get the feeling I'm going to get mistaken for the Tenth Doctor a lot.
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 06:46 am
(Link)
That's brilliant. It's geek chic. I can't imagine how many people are going to want to get you in a phone booth.
[User Picture]
From:[info]jonathan_r_m
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 03:56 am
(Link)
I'll say I wanted to do evil things to him on occasion on VG -- does that count? Draw blood if you can! Begging forgiveness is easier than asking permission ;}
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 04:27 am
(Link)
I think it's fair to say he's had it coming for a while. Building up. Coming to a head. Reaching a climax.

...oh god...


You're right on the second part too. He likes it when I beg. So do I.
[User Picture]
From:[info]jonathan_r_m
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 05:44 am
(Link)
Poor thing, suffering so. Believe me, I feel your pain.

Briliant icon, by the way, all dangerous and scary. I think I need to go and wank.

That is, assuming I have permission...
[User Picture]
From:[info]leo
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 04:21 am
(Link)
Who would've thought Ewan was such a sadistic bastard? Never trust a redhead. ;)
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 04:35 am
(Link)
I'd like to say "Shame. He was such a nice boy too." But no, Ewan was never anything as tame as 'nice'. He's always been wicked.

I kinda like him like that.
[User Picture]
From:[info]scott_speedman
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 04:33 am
(Link)
Sounds like a wonderfully sinful way to pass the time until the party this weekend. :-))

What a shame I'm not in NYC. Biting is a good thing.
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 06:22 am
(Link)
Sinful, yes. Wonderful... not so much, although I'm sure Ewan will tell you different. Bastard.

Agreed on the biting thing. It's my nails at the moment though, and that's probably not so much fun as the, well, the fun kind of biting. If you're going to be at the party next weekend maybe we could test the theory?
[User Picture]
From:[info]scott_speedman
Date:June 21st, 2006 - 12:23 am
(Link)
I'm inclined to agree with Ewan on this one. :)

I will be there as a matter of fact. And I'm always happy to prove a theory. I'll be watching for you... the desperate one. *G*
[User Picture]
From:[info]cillian_murphy
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 04:59 am
(Link)
Just think how fucking amazing it'll be when the explosion comes. *g* Practice deep breathing. Yoga?
[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 06:35 am
(Link)
Yes. Breathing. In and out. In and out. In... out...


Well, fuck. That's no bloody good at all.

Good to see you around. You coming on Saturday?
[User Picture]
From:[info]cillian_murphy
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 06:43 am
(Link)
Try counting, might be more useful.

I'm not sure, I've been hijacked by two very sexy men and they're keeping me busy. If not, I'll be thinking of you. ;)

[User Picture]
From:[info]judel
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 08:10 am
(Link)
Counting. Riiiiiight....

oh, jeez this is hard. I'm going to be so fucking desperate by the time I get to the Carribbean. I'm sure that's the whole point. Desperate and eager to please. It's going to be brilliant. In the meantime though, I'm going to whine to my heart's content.

These two very sexy men? Would those be the two very sexy men I'm thinking of? In which case, good luck. I'd love to see them at the party too, if you can all make it. You guys would make an awesome superhero/supervillain team.
[User Picture]
From:[info]cillian_murphy
Date:June 20th, 2006 - 08:22 am
(Link)
oh, jeez this is hard.

I think I get that. ;)

I'm going to be so fucking desperate by the time I get to the Carribbean. I'm sure that's the whole point. Desperate and eager to please. It's going to be brilliant. In the meantime though, I'm going to whine to my heart's content.

You're giving people ideas. Keep going!

These two very sexy men? Would those be the two very sexy men I'm thinking of? In which case, good luck. I'd love to see them at the party too, if you can all make it. You guys would make an awesome superhero/supervillain team.

I'm going to go with a probably, yes. I know I've been posted about once or twice.

I'm very lucky. Thanks.

The timing is bad, Jude, really. I'd love to go. I look good in spandex but, I don't think it's going to work out. Take pictures for me so I can see you in your constume, please?