Koanju

Note to self:

2008-08-25T21:56:38Z

List of organizations and things I'm doing this semester:

1. 9 credit hours of classes (including Foundations of Criminal Justice, Teaching Sociology, Classical Sociological Theory)
2. Teaching Assistant for Race and Ethnicity
3. Research Assistant for research on Bangalashi women
4. Graduate and Professional Student Council sociology representative
5. Secretary/Treasurer of GA United (GAU, the grad assistant union)
6. Illinois Education Association (IEA, the state-wide union GAU is affliated with) Higher Education Council member
7. Organizing a legislative platform for GAU and local lobbying efforts
8. Finishing my thesis on adult female video game players (seriously, if I haven't talked to you yet about this and you want to do an interview, leave me a message)

...whoops.

Also, I slipped a disc in my back about two weeks ago. Which was fun. Physical therapy two times a week and prescription drugs. Go me.

What else is going on? Not much. What about you guys?

Boston.

2008-07-31T09:01:56Z

Leaving for Boston today at too fucking early A.M.

Returning Monday at too fucking late P.M.

See you all on the flip side.

Things that are frightening.

2008-07-23T17:44:44Z

Apparently you really can't leave your internet past behind.

Ahh, jokersama, this takes me back. What was it your dad used to say about us?

All aboard.

2008-07-07T13:23:49Z

So, I'm sitting in the Detroit airport right now. The Northwest terminal is *huge.* There's around 80 gates. Of course, I deplaned at gate A12 and right now (my flight isn't until 12PM so I expect it'll change soon enough) is at A67. I opted to walk the terminal rather than take the shuttle. It was good exercise.

The RA was awesome and awe-inspiring. I'm not sure I have the brain power at the moment to really sum it up and talk about it the way I'd like to. The days were long, yesterday especially, and I was up at 3AM so I could make my 6:40AM flight out of D.C. But I will say that it was an honor and a privilege to participate in the world's largest parliamentary body. I was able to help chart the course for my union, speak at the Illinois caucus, put in to speak on the RA floor (but they called debate before I had a chance to speak, damnit!), see Obama speak, suggest a new resolution for next year, and despite the 10-12 hour working days, the early mornings, the insane prices of food in D.C., the beds that made my back hurt, I'm energized about unionism and ready to get started. There's a lot to do this year and I'm super-excited to be part of that. (See, you can tell how tired I am when I'm resorting to words like 'super-excited'.)

Best substitution ever.

2008-06-06T20:48:04Z

So, I'm grading papers from Soc 223's final exams (Men and Women in Society). One woman is writing about the male fantasy presented in music videos and how all women shown are nymphomaniacs. Only she doesn't use the word "nymphomaniacs." She used "necrophiliacs."

My day is made.

Another semester over.

2008-05-11T03:18:46Z

Okay, can someone please explain to me what the fuck happened in the latest Tsubasa chapter? Damn CLAMP and their clones and doubles and dual storylines.

The semester ended and I'm taking a week (much needed) off. Let's see, what happened?

1. Have a conference presentation coming up that terrifies me.
2. Have a paper for publication I need to finish writing.
3. Aced my gender and sport seminar, which felt like a near thing given how much of a fucking total waste of time the course was. HUGE. DISAPPOINTMENT. Never, ever, EVER taking a class -- even if it's cross listed in women's studies -- in the kineseology department again, if only to avoid EVER having to see that total incompetent ninny of an instructor to teach the course. Apparently two PhD students from the soc department (including one who has a degree in KIN) turned down the offer, as well as a couple of other people before they dragged a woman who has no experience teaching, took the class two years ago, and only has her MA to teach it. She barely had a handle on the subject herself, which meant she couldn't properly teach a bunch of other people who had no experience with gender studies or social constructionism.
4. Now know a lot more about the correllates of happiness in GSS data over time than I ever fucking wanted to.
5. Have a rough draft for my thesis to work off of. The majority of the thesis writing will be this summer, of course, but the draft I turned in for my deviance paper will do nicely as a jumping off point.
6. Was elected the graduate assistant union Secretary/Treasurer for July 1 2008 - June 30 2009, which makes me happy. No more being responsible for people other than myself! Oh god, such a relief. I forgot how much running meetings, particularly with people who are volunteering their time, sucked ass. LOGISTIC NIGHTMARES. I also was elected the department rep to the Graduate and Professional Student Council (GPSC). 5 hours a month of sitting in meetings, plus any committees I end up on. I plan on going on the grant tech fee committee, which allocates funds for tech departments want to buy (I did it this year, it's quick, it's painless and it's actually sort of cool to decide which projects get funded) and no others, if I can help it.
7. Was elected the union delegate to the Illinois Education Association-National Education Association (IEA-NEA) representative assembly this coming July. 4th of July in Washington fucking D.C. With 9,000 other delegates. Apparently, it's the largest representative policy making body in the country.
8. I've been catching up on the tv, books, movies, anime, and manga I've missed over the last semester. I should have a list of the first three, per se, but I can tell you what I've been reading/watching anime/manga-wise:

Bleach
Naruto
Bastard!!
D.Gray-Man (and what the fuck does that name mean, anyway?)
Deadman Wonderland
Death Note (...okay, yeah, it was a seriously gripping story with the plot twists and turns but, just... Any psychological realism it had for me just went out the window after the thing with L. Possibly because I'm just not interested in Light at all, because he's very predictable as a justice archetype. So's L in his own way, really, but the fact that they're paired together as mirrors is what made me literally blast through the first 60 chapters in about seven hours. I suppose that makes sense, because I've always been more interested in the paranoia control agent than the fascist control agent. But still. I rode it all out and now am full of mirth at seeing the commercials for the Death Note live action film.)
Desire Climax
Fairy Tale (which fucking rocks, btw)
Flame of Recca (Hey, I never actually got around to reading all the manga, so, come on people, that ending? I haven't decided if I like it or don't like it.)
Ga-Rei
Highschool of the Dead
Houshin Engi (up to about, hmm, chapter 120 before I just gave into my boredom and went to do something else)
Hunter x Hunter (current storyline: boring, current characterization of Gon and Killua: interesting, current art style: hideous)
Kurohime
Maijin Tantei Nougami Neuro (liked the anime conclusion what with the fun implications, but I think I like the manga's buildup better)
Ouran High School Host Club
Penguin Revolution (too cute for words!!! Also, the heroine Fujimaru Yukari is my favorite type of character, so I'm predisposed to like it, even if it weren't cute and improbable and fun and smile-inducing)
Perfect Girl Evolution (so fun, horrible backgrounds, but man I wish the point weren't so blatant)
Persona 3 (yes, the P3 manga)
Psycho Buster
Psyren
Shina Dark
Soul Eater
Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles
Vampire Knight (goth vampire shoujo! It's like the bad candy filled with the bad crack!)
xxxholic (my current number one love on the list)
Persona Trinity Soul
Shugo Charat!
Kyou Kara Maoh (the new season)
Monochrome Factor
Toshokan Sensou
Amatsuki
Some other shit I'm probably forgetting

</cut>

9. Re-discovered my love for Robert Downey Jr. He still doesn't have as much of my 80s heart as James Fucking Spader, though. It's close!
10. Making a huge list of video games to play this summer. The one I'm working on now is Lost Odyssey. I adore the 1000 years of dreams segments, much more than the story or the game itself (the trigger ring is actually kind of annoying) even if they do break up the flow of the game A LOT if you watch each episode as it's unlocked. Which I do.

I think that's pretty much it.

Ah, if only the mind was so easy to master.

2008-04-18T15:17:53Z

Intellectually, I know there's nothing to worry about.

But, man, feeling these aftershocks while I'm in my office. On the top floor (4th) of a building. Creepy. It makes my heart jump every time.

Problems with liquids.

2008-03-24T02:06:41Z

All week I've been having issues with liquids; from the small ones (i.e., spilling drinks two or three times a day) to the big one (i.e., the car accident). It's starting to wear on my nerves. Worse yet, since I had a nasty nightmare last night that I put the rental car into a river.

It does have me thinking more than a little about the idea of karma and Murphy's law and what goes around comes around. The more bad things happen to me, the more I'm inclined to believe in karma, as strange as it sounds.

In other news, I probably will only be on a little this week. I have lots of errands to do in the beginning of the week -- contract delivery -- and the conference from Thursday through Sunday. Then the fun of figuring out what to do with my car.

I also finished this great book today: Territory by Emma Bull. It's a retelling of Tombstone with magic. Pretty cool. I'd recommend it to people who like alternate histories.

Flooding strikes back.

2008-03-19T04:11:59Z

So, I ended up in a flooded ditch tonight. Am fine, spending the night at a friend's place because the roads to where I live are all flooded out. Unfortunately, the car is totaled. And my poor cat has to spend the night home alone.

This really happened.

2008-02-24T23:33:47Z

And the number one sign you're a nerd is things like this:

So, I was at a union executive committee meeting. All of us but the VP of membership were there, and we were waiting on her. Ron, the president, was talking about a presentation a professor was going to give, sponsored by Sigma Tau Delta (STD). STD is an English honor society. I joined way way back in, oh, 2000 or so, when I was getting my first degree.

Me: Hey, Ron, is STD a lifetime membership?
Ron: Yes, why? Are you a member?
Me: A long time ago, back when I was actually an English major.
Ron: Why did you turn to the dark side? [I am a sociology grad student now, despite that first English degree.]
Me: Because force lightning is cooler than force persuade.
Ron: ...True that.

Worst. Night. Ever.

2008-02-13T14:24:33Z

Well, probably not, but it was definitely not fun. Let's start from the beginning.

Yesterday was shaping up to be a splendid day. I have a bit of a cold that's going around, so when they called a snow day and closed the university, I was esctatic. It meant a chance to stay in bed and try and get better. Even my realtor called and cancelled my appointment in the afternoon to go look at places for fall (apparently the backroads were pure ice).

I was happy. Until about 6pm.

When the power went out.

No lights, no HEAT. IN WINTER. WHEN THE TEMPERATURE WAS IN THE TEENS.

I lit a bunch of candles, fumbled around in the dark until I found two flashlights. Got all my blankets and piled them on my bed. And curled up with a book. (But not before this happened to me. Sadly, I was only wearing socks at the time.)

My power came back on at around 5am this morning, but apparently a lot of people are still without. My house still hasn't quite warmed up (or hadn't when I left at 7am).

The fun continues today, where the university is not closed. The main roads are patchy, but mostly clear, and the backroads are... pure ice. I did a little sliding getting to the main roads, but nothing serious. No, the serious part happened when I got out of the car. And did a nice wipeout on the COMPLETELY ICE-COVERED SIDEWALKS on the way to the building. Luckily, my laptop is fine. My back and rear and the ankle I slid on before going down... throbbing and will probably be nicely blue by the time I go home this afternoon.

But since I'm here on campus (and warm, so warm), time to attempt to get some work done before my 1pm meeting. Of which I still don't have the materials needed. Wonderful.

Travel

2008-02-05T22:42:48Z

Well, to my surprise I'm now co-author on a paper that was accepted to a regular session at the ASA (American Sociological Association) annual meeting this fall. Which means that, well, it'd be very very good for my career if I go to the ASA annual meeting this fall.

The bad news is that it happens before fall semester starts. Before loan money comes in. While all grad students are poor.

So, basically, what I'm looking for is two things:

1. Someone who is willing to put me up in Boston from July 31 - August 4 (this is the ASA conference, plus a section pre-conference, which I'm submitting a paper to).
2. Someone who is willing to put me up in Seattle (or nearby Seattle) from August 29 - 31. This is when PAX is. I will have money by then, but I think it would be more fun with other people, even if it is a working trip. The beautiful thing about using adult female video game players as your thesis participants/subjects is that your field work is at... events like PAX.

Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?

Out of curiosity?

2008-02-01T16:18:48Z

Do I know anyone who will be in Seattle (or rented car rate reasonable driving distance) of Seattle at the end of August?

127.0.0.1 is the loneliest number.

2008-02-01T01:46:40Z

I really would like this shirt, because it makes me laugh. However, I feel it would join my collection of geektastic shirts that alternately get me weird looks or people stopping me on campus pointing and jumping up and down and going "O.M.G. WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?" (This would actually be fairly cool if these random people didn't actually spell out 'O.M.G.') The Han Shot First shirt is especially good for this reaction.

Anyway!

I've been insanely busy this week, between meetings and classes and my assistantship. But somehow I managed to write a 3500 word essay on video games, the perception of games as less, the violence/sexuality debate, and the deviance of adult female gamers. And how they aren't really deviant, but society refuses to wake up and smell the next-gen consoles. I might post it at some point, if people are interested. It's not anything really publishable, but it's a memo for my thesis. For those who don't actually do qualitative research, memoing is basically something you do throughout every step of the process. You write theory, you write observations, you write reactions, you write basically everything up. I love writing, but sometimes it's enough to make me remember why positivism is so popular. (Not that I'm not doing a pretty heavy quantoid project this semester -- ordered probit and trend analysis, anyone? -- but...)

Oh, and I did a crapload of work for the union. Yep. Here at SIU we've got a graduate assistant union and just finished bargaining our first contract, but there's still a lot of work to do to strengthen the union and truly create an environment of solidarity and just working conditions. I'm actually going on a retreat this weekend to plan and organize. I'm looking forward to it, it'll be fun (and hey, it's paid for, including free booze and food) but I'm also not sure I want to spend three days in close contact like that. Oh well! Too late to back out now, I'm a union officer (head of the stewards council), so it's sort of part and parcel of leadership.

I'm sure you all don't want to hear me babble about that.

In other, er, virtual news, the Devil May Cry 4 demo was fun but... same-old same-old. Rock Band drums are difficult; I just can't get that foot pedal down. I'm fine with the pads but whenever I have to hit the pedal, whoops, there goes all my rhythm.

The Mighty Boosh is hilarious.

My ears don't lie.

2007-10-12T12:58:51Z

Last night's SPN sampled the Nightmare on Elm Street theme. That cracks me up.

Typing numbers on a laptop really sucks.

2007-09-12T17:53:17Z

In a moment of utter and blissful geekitude, I spent the last, oh, five hours playing with random variables in the General Social Survey (GSS) 2006 data to see what weird and random things I could find out. Now I have to stop because my shoulders hurt from the oddly stooped position I've been sitting in, the cat wants attention, and I think I want to spend some time baking. And possibly some time cleaning. And relaxing. I'm ahead on work. For now. I suppose if I really wanted to be ahead I could get started on my crim lit review. Or work ahead into some ANOVA stuff for stats, since my brain was apparently eaten by the Correlation Monster.

Or I could actually write that post about games that's been in my brain for ages. But I probably won't. I'm lazy. I'll write it up tomorrow while I'm waiting between class and appointments.

In other news, I apparently got a tuition scholarship. Heh.

...I could read an actual book. Of fiction. Must resist urge to go to bookstore. Must. Resist.

Drunken yay.

2007-09-03T04:16:14Z

Long weekends good. Loss of internet access during them bad. Going out with new friends and consuming three pina coladas and a pomegranite mojito... good. At least until tomorrow.

Also: Persona 3's Bebe is about as hysterically stereotypically "gay as a fanny pack on John Waters." To quote someone I heard this weekend. Now I drink lots of water, take some aspirin and play a little more of Atlus's Dating Sim Gone Wild at least until I pass out. Which'll probably be soon.

Look Ma, no spell check!

Twice in one day; I must be high or something!

2007-08-27T02:08:50Z

Gamers' world reveals secrets of the next epidemic

I read this and I laughed and laughed. Then I realized what people did in the game is exactly what people would do in real life and that shut me up pretty quickly. Also, it's a really interesting social experiment; sort of puts the Black Death in perspective.

But the coolest thing about a WoW epidemic is that real epidemiologists used the virtual outbreak to study behaviors, such as the "stupid factor," they hadn't considered in creating outbreak models. Of course, my thought to that is mostly: "you don't consider the stupid factor first?"

Research topics

2007-08-21T03:26:36Z

I think I want to do a qualitative research project on female genital piercing. This could be a cool project because a) piercings squick me (yes, even ear piercings), so it's a chance to explore something that gives me the willies and b) because of the connotations with pornography and female genital mutilation and legality issues.

The hard part will be finding at least two people who are willing to own up to having one and agree to be interviewed. If you are one or know someone, will you please get in touch with me? Leave a comment or email me and I can go over it with you.

Cat on my head.

2007-08-18T17:22:30Z

Domain successfully reclaimed. Databases almost successfully retooled and updated. Some data lost, recreated the pages and link listings. Mourning the loss of all comments. Wonder how long it will be before someone reads this page again. Fond of speaking without pronouns.

All pretentiousness aside, I've somehow managed to survive my almost first week of work + graduate school. This makes me happy; it would make me happier if I weren't still sick. Yes, the head cold is still here and on top of that I managed to bite my tongue somehow last night while I was sleeping.

There's apparently hurricane Dean boiling and brewing right now. We talked some about this last night at work and it didn't really hit me until this morning. You see, I just started working for Hyatt. (Queue another post sometime later about the insane corporate culture they have.) I'm in training to be a reservation agent, which means I'll be talking to those people fleeing from the gulf. Already people are packing up and leaving New Orleans for fear it hits them and the levees break again.

You can talk all you want, and I know I spent a lot of time being pissed off in my econ class because of the horribly racist and classist connotations of the professor's take on the situation, about Katrina and just how bad the government response was and what should have been done to help move people out and why some couldn't, etc. And it really hit me that I'm going to be working in hospitality during hurricane season. I'm going to be assisting this people, or at least be trying to, find them a place, any place to go that they can take themselves, their things, their families, their pets that's safe. That's really a pretty awesome responsibility.

In other news, I think I have about three different ideas for research papers right now and at least one doesn't seem to have much in the way of literature out there about it, at least when I did some preliminary searching on the topic yesterday, so it's a possible thesis topic. The other big one probably has been done but I haven't actually tried a lit search yet. I plan on doing some Monday afternoon. This weekend is strictly for relaxation and catching up on stuff I need to do.

To do, in the future

2007-08-15T12:39:40Z

Sometime this weekend, when I have time completely free and have caught up on sleep, remind me to write that essay I've been thinking about on the shifting and occasionally classist definition of "fandom." Because I really don't have enough to do in the next couple of weeks. And now I'm off to my 8 hour departmental orientation and then 5 hours of work directly after! Yay!

Uwe Boll's Five Steps To Being A Wanker

2007-08-14T21:12:02Z

Uwe Boll FTW!

So, celebrity deathmatch: Uwe Boll vs. Anne Rice; who wins?

And now I go in for my second day of work with a nasty head cold.

It's pretty, but now what?

2007-08-13T00:13:46Z

I've finally succeeded in making my Wordpress look virtually indistinguishable from a LJ. Go me.

I start training for my new job tomorrow; this makes me happy. It also makes me worried because it's an evening shift 40 hour a week job and not the much-hoped for grad assistantship. I am apparently an alternate for a tuition scholarship, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed. Given the pay drop at my new job (it's about $4 or so less than the one I left) I'll need something to help pay the rent. Especially if 40 hours a week + 12 hours of graduate classes = dropping grades. Especially since it's a 15 mile drive from school to work and I live smack dab in the middle of the two. Yay for loads of gas!

Next project: fixing up one of my mostly defunct domains, as soon as I figure out what the hell to do with it. Or successfully manage to pawn the space off on someone else. Either way works. And then finally doing a needed reorganization of my del.icio.us. I'm anal like that. I get in these "MUST CLEAN AND ORGANIZE NOW" mood and... I clean and organize like crazy. I got up this morning and switched out the litter and swept the floors and double checked my book and movies databases. I need to edit the forms a bit, I think, since there's a lot of extraneous information I built into the databases to input (like publish year or lead actors) that I haven't bothered to use. And I need to update my games database. Oh, and make a burned stuff database. I haven't bothered with a music one because I've moved to a totally digital collection. So now that my house is clean and organized (I did laundry on Friday and even moved furniture around in my bedroom today). I've got photos from moving in up on my flickr, though my personal favorite is probably this one because I absolutely adore my corner shelves.

The place needs more pictures on the walls, though. I really wish my cat hadn't eaten Africa ages ago or that I have a few star charts, because I love maps and that was a particularly nice one. (Ha, now you all know what to get me for Christmas. Hangable detailed maps!)

Though every time I talk about maps, I always think of that West Wing episode, Someone's Going to Emergency, Someone's Going To Jail (S2), in which C.J. discovers that maps are wrong. (For the record, the one you can see hanging in my living room in those pictures is a Winkel Tripel projection. circa 2005.) I suppose, if I wanted to do another post for ibarw about real cultural imperialism, I could talk about teaching to the Mercator projection and bring up all the points that Aaron Sorkin made for me in that episode. But I'm lazy and hot and hungry and Youtube serves up the point precisely in about 2 minutes.

Really freaking eerie.

2007-08-10T05:36:57Z

So I went out and saw Live Free or Die Hard tonight and indulged in completely mindless destruction, violence and the awesome that Bruce Willis can still be an action hero in his 50s. I did not allow myself to think about the problematic presentations of women (hot Asian hacker-martial artist chick who was repeatedly referred to as a hooker, strong daughter who takes after Daddy McClane but still has to be saved by a man chick, and the random FBI assistant chick) and race (wait, there were minorities in this movie? Oh, right! There's Bowman and the four that I counted in miscellaneous crowd scenes! Woo! Racism is totally dead in the US!) and did my best to just enjoy the pretty pretty fire.

Yippee ki-yay, motherfucker.

This was further compounded by the wtf of the three lights along the highway from the theater to my town being down. Very freaky.

How the hell do people live in the south? I totally don't get it. I just moved about 160 miles south (I'm in spitting distance of three states; it's actually kind of cool) and it's ten degrees hotter on average than where I used to live. And it's wetter, which makes it worse. Stupid high 90F temps. And I'm actually going out during the day so I had to spend $10 on a bottle of SPF 50 sunscreen. I walk outside and I turn crispy. Then I drench myself in sweat. I'm afraid what my first power bill is going to look like from running the AC just to keep from dehydrating myself (I keep it set at 80).

I have to go clothes shopping, since I'll be working in a professional dress environment again. All I have is long sleeved shirts and that is, trust me, not cutting it in 95-100F weather.

And I have to find some way to reconcile my arachnophobia and the three spiders I've seen today. Teddy took care of one for me, thankfully, but I have a spider bite on my leg so I know they're crawling around on me at night. I just hope it's a couple that are getting in because the back door isn't sealed well or something and not an infestation my landlord somehow missed. Thank god none of them are recluses. I'd be on the phone immediately with my landlord bitching him out if I saw one of those.

ibarw: visibility

2007-08-08T17:34:56Z

This isn't so much an essay or a personal account, as it is a question and a challenge.

I watch TNT a lot in the mornings and afternoons (more so now that I've been out of work and have next to nothing better to do/watch) because I like the reruns of old school E.R. and Law and Order. They've been showing promos for The Ron Clark Story, a made-for-TV movie about a small town (white) teacher, Ron Clark, who moves to New York City and starts teaching at (AFAIR) a mostly all-black school. I saw it ages ago, when it first premiered, so I pretty much dismiss the commercials as background noise.

But since it is International Blog Against Racism Week (ibarw) I realized something. I can, off the top of my head, think about about seven or eight movies (either dramas or comedies) in which a white teacher goes into an ethnically-dominated school and shapes up the classes/students that everyone else has just plain given up on or inspires their students to perform and succeed in ways they weren't before:

1. The previously mentioned Ron Clark Story
2. Dangerous Minds
3. Music of the Heart
4. The Blackboard Jungle (with a
5. High School High
6. (stretching the category a bit to include mentors) Finding Forrester
7. (private tutor) The King and I/Anna and the King
8. The Substitute (and possibly its sequels, of which I'm seen neither)

Then I tried to think about it the other way around. What movies have I seen that shows a person of color/minority as an inspirational teacher/mentor either to other minority-dominated classes or to white students:

1. To Sir, With Love
2. Stand and Deliver.
3. Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit (I suppose you could also technically include the original Sister Act if you're willing to stretch your idea of who students are)
4. Lean on Me

Now, I know there's got to be more of these movies and presentations that I haven't run into. Because I'm fairly uncomfortable with the idea that we still perpetuate the myth that the "savages" have to be "tamed" by the good, noble white person. I know intellectually that it exists but I never quite thought about the perpetuation shown quite so baldly. School is, after all, societal indoctrination and a primary source of socialization for most children. Even more, I can't recall seeing this type of movie for any minority but African Americans and Latino/Hispanic Americans.

So, rec me! Tell me movies I've missed. I've got nothing but free time right now.