[Most Recent Entries] [Calendar View] [Friends]
Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in
Metaquotes' LiveJournal:
| Saturday, November 7th, 2009 | |
| 4:52 pm | netsrikeel1 posts about prostitution at badfic_quotes Copper and Iron Vignette in which Rorschach reflects in a back alleyway beyond the prostitutes and filth You know it's going to be nothing but "See whores. Young whores, old whores, strung whores, bold whores. Seen whores lie. Seen whores die. Yesterday, saw head crushed in door; belonged, of course, to filthy whore. Whores dream, whores scream, but whores forget; New York, for sins, will always abet." I don't think I need to Seuss up Rorschach anymore, and really need to stop right here and now. Context is also unamused by how many people in the Harry Potter fandom find prostitution hilarious. |
| 4:52 pm | netsrikeel1 posts about prostitution at badfic_quotes Copper and Iron Vignette in which Rorschach reflects in a back alleyway beyond the prostitutes and filth You know it's going to be nothing but "See whores. Young whores, old whores, strung whores, bold whores. Seen whores lie. Seen whores die. Yesterday, saw head crushed in door; belonged, of course, to filthy whore. Whores dream, whores scream, but whores forget; New York, for sins, will always abet." I don't think I need to Seuss up Rorschach anymore, and really need to stop right here and now. |
| 1:33 am | Julia Child she is not... When I cook, thing can get...interesting. Generally I come out with pretty awesome food as a result, but getting to that point often involved my temper rising--when utensils don't do what I want them to do, or there are too many pots and pans going at once and something's boiling over, or when our super-sensitive smoke alarm system goes off. Here's a basic translation guide: Profanity - Warning: The actual profanity you may hear may vary from the examples given. Each string of profanity is individually crafted with care and organic materials. FUCK! = One thing is going wrong MOTHERFUCKER! = Two things are going wrong simultaneously COCKSUCKING MOTHERFUCKER FROM HELL! = At least three things are going wrong simultaneously; be wary POXRIDDEN SPAWN OF A GUTTERSLUTFUCKER FROM THE BOIL-RIDDEN GOAT-ARSE OF SATAN! = Take cover, preferably in an intact fallout shelter if you have access to one. Do not attempt to quantify how many things are going wrong. Do not ask later, either. There is no way to safely gauge whether or not utensils will be hurled in your direction. Smoke Alarm - They're all connected, so when one goes, they all go. Goes off once = Something's boiling over Goes off twice = The oven is being cantankerous Goes off more than twice = Satan got tired of me taking his arse in vain, and has arrived to discuss the matter--politely, of course. Goes off in conjunction with profanity = supper's done--get your drinks! Context is served! Flocked, QWP. |
| Friday, November 6th, 2009 | |
| 11:39 pm | ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} padparadscha probably doesn't have psychic powers:I just tried to use the Force to pull my jump drive* to where I was sitting. westriderchimes in:I thought only guys had much of their brain in their Sticks?Context is not Matilda. |
| 6:04 pm | In an entry about the Pledge of Allegiance (and failures thereof) in mock_the_stupid valkyriekaren: I'm not even sure I understand what point he's trying to make. This pledge is so important and sacred to us and the memory of the Founding Fathers... that we dicked around with it in the 50s to shove some godbothering in there? zenicurean: "Well it's what the Founding Fathers would've wanted, except for the atheists, the agnostics, the anticlericalists, the secular Deists, the uncommitted, the disinterested, the ones who'd have thought it dangerous, and the terminally vague, just like you there, Jefferson, I'm on to you."Comment thread here. |
| 3:15 am | I want this on a bumper sticker. Or an icon. copperbadge has had enough:THIS DAY IS MORE THAN FIRED. I'M PUTTING OUT A HIT ON IT. Context could never get the hang of Thursdays. |
| 12:10 am | dragonazure tracks a new disease vector:mistressrhi indicates there is a new disease on the rise. WH1N3, otherwise known as the "Whine Flu". Symptoms include uncontrolled kvetching, extreme ranty-ness, and chronic complaining. Highly contagious. Some people are prone to organ recitals: Oh, my back! I'm taking liver pills! My spleen hurts! Heavens to Mergatroid, I'm now allergic to air and water! WARNING! HIGHLY CONTAGIOUS! Originating disease vectors may include lack of adequate planning, lack of forethought, hypochondria, and/or inability to take responsibility for one's self. Exposure to people suffering from WH1N3 can trigger similar symptoms. Run! It's the Schleprockalypse! Note: Do not confuse with the W1N3 strain of influenza, which induces snobbery with regard to fermented grape-based beverages and condescending attitudes towards people who do not understand “bouquet” and “finishing notes”. QWP, and in full |
| Thursday, November 5th, 2009 | |
| 9:25 pm | Do you ever get that not-so-bacony feeling? During a discussion of products designed to change the scent of one's genitalia, hotcoffeems muses on bacon- and pizza-flavored possibilities:Vulvae should not smell like flowers, somehow. Context reminds you NEVER to insert something sugary into your vagina. |
| 8:01 pm | ironychan tells Ancient Greek what’s what: So the Ancient Greek word for "I wish Soenso would go away" is ioih. That's four vowels in a row! Stupid Greeks, no wonder they got conquered. You don't see the Romans lining up four vowels and calling it a word. How the hell do you even pronounce that? "ee-oi-yay"? That's not a word, that's the chorus of Old MacDonald. Context shamelessly conjugates. |
| 5:29 am | We all have our own cravings starsandtildes has some odd cravings during that time of the month:Some people want steak when they're on their periods. I always want noncon. Context has yet to be satiated. Locked, QWP. |
| 4:03 am | seanan_mcguire is a professional, honestly! Alice, on the other hand... ...There's a reason I don't usually take phone calls in my house. The Agent called to discuss my upcoming trip to New York, during which we're going to be doing several dinner-type things, some meeting-type things, and a lot of hanging out. During our forty-minute or so discussion, she was treated to... "Ow! Ow ow OW! Goddammit, Alice, get your claws out of my fucking leg!" "No. No, you can't have that. No, that isn't yours. No." "Get off of there! Jesus, cat, I swear, I will skin you." "I can get new cats, you know. Better cats. Smaller cats. Cats that don't do that." "Alice, give back my bra." "I'm serious, Alice. Give me back my damn bra." "THAT'S MY FUCKING BRA, CAT!" "Okay, I give up. Just do whatever the fuck you want." ...all while we were having a serious business discussion. I swear, the fact that she hasn't drowned me and put me out of her misery is something of a miracle. QWP, under the onslaught of a gorgeous Maine Coon. |
| Wednesday, November 4th, 2009 | |
| 8:46 pm | nihil_duce responds to the county-by-county breakdown on Ref. 71... Regardless of whether 71 passes or fails I am going to green light every law, bill, referendum, imperial decree or drunken idea written on the back of a cocktail napkin that insures that hillbilly backwoods cro-mags take it in the pants somehow. You show me a plan where they, their children and their children's children are reduced to digging marsh beets for sustenance and hoping that the village lawspeaker doesn't sacrifice them to Thrakzog the Swamp God to keep the wolves out of the huts for another moon cycle and I will follow you to the ends of the earth. You might be ready to say "It's like that already". I want it legislated. — context is FLocked, QWP, and not gonna take it anymore. |
| 2:25 pm | fenris_lorsai in relating a story...Little does the ST know the chaos to follow now that the character with Science has a Really Big Lever. Context is sharing RPG events |
| 8:45 am | "What I found was a neurosurgeon." sdmrks10 is recovering from surgery, and gets an insensitive message from a family member.My step mother's parents know I am not a "believer" and even so, sent me a get well card attempting to save me - or help me "find victory in the lord." Well, as I quipped before, what I found was a neurosurgeon, and on top of that, how dare you use my suffering to attempt to indoctrinate me! Think of it in this manner - what if you, a believer, were ill or suffering in some manner - and I, fully knowing you are a believer, sent you a copy of "The God Delusion" with a card stating that you are much better off trusting your doctor than a fictional magical sky man? Context is doing just fine with the REAL sources of support available to her, thankyouverymuch. :) |
| 7:04 am | In which my brother bolddeciever rescues Grandma and Grandpa's cat:Well, I just got back from a catnapping. Since Grandma and Grandpa's stay in MS has been extended indefinitely, they were worried about their cat Valentino, who has a neighbor coming over to feed him but who's been pretty much alone since they left, so I was talked into driving down to Kirkland, stuffing the cat in a carrier, and dragging him up to Kirkland. (Tino had other ideas; he wasn't terribly articulate in expressing them but I think they were along the lines of "I'll scratch your face off." I explained that, while emotionally satisfying, his proposal didn't do much to solve the problem at hand. Like any good demagogue he stuck to his guns, so we put it to a vote, weighted by size and presence of higher cognitive function, and the crate-and-car idea won the day.) I've got him in the bathroom right now until I'm convinced he's rediscovered the concept of "litter box" (he was an outdoor cat down in Oly, and really can't be here for various reasons). |
| 7:04 am | In which my brother bolddeciever rescues Grandma and Grandpa's cat:Well, I just got back from a catnapping. Since Grandma and Grandpa's stay in MS has been extended indefinitely, they were worried about their cat Valentino, who has a neighbor coming over to feed him but who's been pretty much alone since they left, so I was talked into driving down to Kirkland, stuffing the cat in a carrier, and dragging him up to Kirkland. (Tino had other ideas; he wasn't terribly articulate in expressing them but I think they were along the lines of "I'll scratch your face off." I explained that, while emotionally satisfying, his proposal didn't do much to solve the problem at hand. Like any good demagogue he stuck to his guns, so we put it to a vote, weighted by size and presence of higher cognitive function, and the crate-and-car idea won the day.) I've got him in the bathroom right now until I'm convinced he's rediscovered the concept of "litter box" (he was an outdoor cat down in Oly, and really can't be here for various reasons). |
| Tuesday, November 3rd, 2009 | |
| 2:49 pm | heebee: So I was thinking about Disney's Beauty and the Beast and how Belle says that she wants "adventure in the great wide somewhere" but then spends the majority of the film locked up in a castle. But then if you think of it as a dungeon, then it's like she's Link, only she fell in love with the boss monster. Context is sprouting plotbunnies right and left. |
| 3:55 am | No "Meat Puppets" jokes, please. apocalypticbob laments the death of her Wahl massager, to the tune of "Lake of Fire":Where Do Sex Toys Go? ApocalypticBob Where do sex toys go when they die Do you throw them away with a tear in your eye Bury them and wave a long goodbye Can't recycle them no matter how you try I knew a lady who came from O.K. Used a pack of batteries everyday Started to look for some plug in fun flew away howling on her Hitachi Wand Where do sex toys go when they die Do you throw them away with a tear in your eye Bury them and wave a long goodbye Can't recycle them no matter how you try Ladies squirm and the men all moan Look for a new toy to make them groan Their plaything becomes their new best friend It's hard to say so long when they reach their end Where do sex toys go when they die Do you throw them away with a tear in your eye Bury them and wave a long goodbye Can't recycle them no matter how you try QWP. Context gives her "deepest" apologies to Nirvana. |
| Monday, November 2nd, 2009 | |
| 9:10 pm | In Soviet Russia, history writes you. A fanfic passes into the Twilight Zone that is a romance between Grand Duchess Anastasia's son and Josef Stalin's daughter. ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif){kind=small} liekomgwtfbbq has some thoughts."Your daughter is a little proletariat whore! She is not good enough for my son!" "Your son is a bourgeois asshat!" "Your mother is so communist she shares her ass with the rest of the gulag each night! The sainted Czar Nicholas had a piece of her the night before the revolution!" "Don't you talk about my mother that way! My mother was a saint! Your father was a royal douche!" *fisticuffs, guns firing, revolting, communism* Context wants peace, bread, land and all power to... someone. |
| Thursday, October 29th, 2009 | |
| 5:53 pm | Safety first! cvirtue on the raising of children:The kids had done their homework, so I asked them "Do you want to have a run around and scream session?" Which they did. During the course of this, Arthur was chasing Elizabeth with a pretend chainsaw, which makes great noises. She was doing a lot of shrieking. ME: Both of you, come here right now. A & E: Aww, Moooommmm, whine, etc etc. ME: Now Arthur: when you hold a chain saw, you need to have both hands on both of the handles. It isn't safe otherwise. A: Oh! Ok! ME: Ok, now start chasing her again. A & E: shrieks, yells, running, etc. Context is QWP, but insists on all safety checks before proceeding |