Who, Me?

Okay, I couldn't help myself. I ordered The Lair, the spinoff of Dante's Cove. Lucky me, Amazon sent it from a local distribution center, so I got it in like a day.

Holy crap, it's every bit as crackalicious as Dante's Cove, and I've only watched like 20 minutes. I am gonna LOVE sending Sam and Dean there on their missing stripper case. Magic, vampires, naked boys, naked boys dancing and doing Other Fun Stuff. Plus... plus.... I think this series has its very own Toby and Kevin. This is gonna be the most fun I've had with fic in a looooong time.

Ahhh, Supernatural... my happy place. Within are my thoughts on the good, the bad and the ugly... and oh hell, so much good, very little bad, and the ugly was awesome.

I left this sitting for a couple weeks with all that's been going on around here, and finally found the time to take care of Sam's boner. I think he's grateful. So is Dean, the perv.

( Sam/Dean smut this way )

Yikes. Spam is trying to eat one of the hosting servers. We had to ease way back on the spam filtering until we can implement a new solution. In the meantime, I'm seeing a whole lot more spam, of course.

I find myself strangely amused by the subject lines. Such as:

--My boyfriend's dick keeps slipping out

--My boyfriend's putz is too big for my mouth

--My new guy's peter is enormous, my mouth is tiny

--Hi honey, remember me?
(coming right after the tiny mouth thing, this cracked me up.)

--Top stories for the tag "Penis"!!
(This one actually intrigued me)

--Tell me what's wrong, baby. I can fix it!

Clearly, the spam filters have spoiled me, if I'm finding spam funny today. I hope to hell we can get a handle on the spam flood before it ceases to amuse me and begins to piss me off.

Okay, first. I really wish the packaging for SG-1 Season Ten didn't so prominently feature Carter's boobs. Contrary to popular (male) belief, her breasts were not responsible for saving the galaxy.

Next. Turns out there is such a thing as medicinal masturbation. As it happens, orgasms are good for temporarily relieving sinus congestion. Who knew? But caution is necessary... it takes a lot of them to truly replace a good OTC decongestant. Use that information wisely.

Third. I am sick to frigging death of those dumbass viagra commercials. There's something extremely creepy and very wrong about my 6:00 evening news breaking for a commercial in which grungy middle-aged men sit around together in a grungy, otherwise empty bar, stroking their musical instruments and singing the praises of their boners.

There. I feel better. :)

Okay, so I've spent the last couple weeks (or months) buried in the back-end of the server stuff. And it's not as naughty as it sounds, actually. But tonight, I finally took a minute to really look around at some of the newer communities and journals here, and holy shit! I'm practically in Supernatural paradise!

I feel like a kid who threw back the covers, looked out the window, and saw a carnival in her back yard! Oooh, clowns! And porn! It's everything a girl could ask for.

I shall take another moment to savor the bounty. And then I'm gonna try to take a few minutes to finish off some of that SPN filth I have started. I left poor Sam sitting there with an unrelenting boner. Bad me.

Everybody gets that now and then, right? Only me? For some reason, it's running through my head with a slight twist that I just don't get. Since watching Supernatural on Thursday, White Rabbit has been on replay in my head. It ordinarily wouldn't bother me. Like I said, it happens now and then. It can be annoying, but it isn't fatal. The thing is, when I hear it in my head, I keep hearing this one line sung as:

And if you go chasing wabbits.

Yes. I cannot hear the song in my head without hearing wabbit instead of rabbit. Got no clue why. I don't recall ever thinking Grace Slick had a speech impediment. Huh.

To me, that is the sadist part of the hole situation.

This after a discussion of premarital sex in the student's first assignment of the class. Sometimes, sometimes, I love my job.

I'm ready to take a fucking shotgun to that cricket outside my window. Blow his little squeaky fucking legs off. I can't hear Shrek 2, dammit.

It was 105 degrees here today. No A/C in the house. With popsicles and my fan, I survived. Even though at 8 pm it was still 90 degrees outside. Ugh.

Took a break from server shit to play Bookworm for a while. I need to experience the outside world more, I think... I was quite angry for a while that the game wouldn't accept Yoda, spooge or cunt as valid words.

Watched a lot of cartoons this week with my nephew. I'm now fully conversant on Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends. I fell madly in love with Cheese on thursday's episode. I've taken to spontaneous bursts of Cheese quotes the last couple days. I've also found myself giggling at random intervals and repeating "Orlando Bloo" in memory of Bloo's efforts to break up Frankie and her new boyfriend Dylan. Yeah, well, I guess you had to be there.

And I really, really want to shoot that fucking cricket.

I need a vacation.

I try to be a good aunt, I really do. Sometimes I fuck up. Like tonight.

I took the time to distract my nephew with Spongebob while I fixed the deck to give him a good hand. I was afraid he'd catch me if I delt from the bottom of the deck, so I inserted the cards at the top of the deck, in what I thought was the right order.

Uh. I mis-counted where to put them. I was off by one-- in my direction.

Yes, I cheated at cards. With a 9 year old. If there's a hell, I'm burning for sure.

The worst part?? It didn't occur to me until after I won the pot that I shoulda thrown away the good cards. Doh! I swear, I was just too shocked at what I'd done for it to cross my mind!

I did end up fixing the deck the right way the next time, so my nephew did get a good hand the next deal. But man...

After we were finished, I sat down at the computer, and I was confessing my deeds to Caly, when it occurred to me... Oh my fucking god, I'm EZRA!!! Okay, so I'm an Accidental Ezra, but I'm Ezra all the same.

Jeez. Karma's gonna get me, I just know it. There's probably a special cosmic justice for people who cheat little kids at cards. I am so in for it.

Bad news? The Dell is dead. It went down not in a blaze of glory, but in a blaze of ominous beeps and boot failures. All my settings are lost, which sucks big time. Some of my porn and a lot of pictures are lost. Weep for me. Especially for the loss of porn. Real, goodness to naked gracious porn.

The good news is that Best Buy had an awesome deal on E-Machines. And after 3 days of battling with drivers and inept tech support at SBC, I finally have a DSL connection. Dialup is TORTURE, I tell you. Torture!

I'll eventually get out the old hard drive and try to set it up as a slave to try to get my old files retrieved. But for now, I want to revel in a new, clean machine. And I've got my DVDs ready to make backups. I kinda hadn't done that in about a year. Oops. That'll learn me!

I thought at first that the quiet buzz I was hearing about a threat to Net Neutrality was just a vague threat, and thus that was why it was quiet. But noooooo. This could seriously change the face of the Internet as we know it, and guess what? JournalFen would be one of the casualties if the end of Net Neutrality becomes reality. US Congress is right now considering various bills and changes to the latest Telecom Act that would change the face of the Internet forever.

What is this threat, do you ask? Well, the big ISPs (AT&T, Verizon, Comcast, specifically, and really, there aren't many more) want to regulate content and the speed at which it reaches their customers' browsers. Site owners would either have to pay the ISPs to have their content delivered normally, or would be relegated to sloooooow delivery.

It wouldn't matter if you have broadband access. The only sites and content you'll get at fast speeds will be the content your ISP allows to go through at that speed. If the owner of the site you're accessing isn't paying the ISPs (and really, how many sites will be able to afford that), you'll either be forced to live with the slow speeds, or-- and this is what the ISPs want-- you'll feel compelled to access content from sites that *do* pay and are delivered at the speeds you're used to.

Is this threat real? Yep. It's why in the last few years, the Telecoms beat even the health insurance and related industries in the money spent lobbying congress (upwards of HALF A BILLION DOLLARS since 1998). The COPE Bill is coming up, and promises to give the Telecoms everything they want, and leave the door open for them to change the Internet as we know it, for further skyrocketing profit, and to our detriment. Common Cause outlines it nicely in this pdf:
http://www.commoncause.org/atf/cf/{FB3C17E2-CDD1-4DF6-92BE-BD4429893665}/COPE-BILL_5-4-06.PDF

Common Cause also has a petition form prepared (that you can edit and fill in your own words) asking Senators to co-sponsor a bill that would specifically protect Network Neutrality:
http://www.commoncause.org/siteapps/advocacy/index.aspx?c=dkLNK1MQIwG&b=1529265&action=5826&template=x.ascx

Don't take my word for it, though. Look through the info at Common Cause, and even do some Googling (while you still can) and see for yourself what the Telecoms and their buddies in congress (from both parties, mind) have in store for us.

All of us have heard lyrics incorrectly before, I'm sure. I've been listening to the 70's music channel a lot lately, on my cable lineup... sort of reliving my youth, I guess.

One result is that I've been noticing lyrics more than I ever really had. You remember the song "Precious and Few" by Climax, right? Well, I'd always thought it was a song about lovebirds... "precious and few are the moments sweet toucans share." Yes, I finally, just last night, heard correctly, "precious and few are the moments we two can share."

I'm pretty sure this bird thing was inspired by my love of Froot Loops and Toucan Sam. My love of Froot Loops was only rivaled by that of Boo Berries. Besides:

"Quiet and blue, like the sky, I'm hung over you.
And if I can't find my way back home, it just wouldn't be fair."

That sounds reasonably like birds flying home and frolicking in tree branches, right? Right??

So anyway, I was feeling nostalgic about Toucan Sam in the wee hours of the morning, so I googled him, and guess what??? I stumbled across someone else who'd made the same damn mistake with Precious and Few! I'm not the only dork in the world who heard toucans in that song!!!

After further googling, I discovered I'm also not, by far, the only dork who thought "Blinded by the Light" mentioned something "wrapped up like a douche" instead of "wrapped up like a deuce."

I take comfort that I'm not alone in the muddlings of my mind.

From discovery.com:

TLC — I Am My Own Twin
I Am My Own Twin


Babies are being born split right down the middle, half black and half white, a testicle on one side and a vagina on the other. Explore the extraordinary medical phenomena that causes two different babies to fuse together in the womb.

**********

My first thought is whether the personalities are split, too... As in, does the vagina side play with Barbies while the testicle side plays with itself?

For anyone interested, here's the link:
http://tlc.discovery.com/tvlistings/episode.jsp?episode=0&cpi=111185&gid=0&channel=TLC

Okay, so I have my niece with me again. The same one who talks about The Magic "Tortalini" and her belief in reincarnation and atheism. And she's still 12 years old.

Anyway... I had freshly laundered sheets and pillow cases out, but she was sprawled on the bed, listening to her iPod. I tossed the sheets and stuff on the bed and told her to make herself useful.

She says: I am useful. I'm dancing.

I said: That's not dancing. That's just waving your fingers.

She says: They're busy hands. Isn't that supposed to be a religious thing?

I said: I dunno. I know it's not getting the sheets on the bed.

She says: I think it's like Jesus.

I said: What's Jesus got to do with it?

She says: He had busy hands. So he stayed busy enough. How else do you think he got that 6-pack?

I said: Jesus had a 6-pack?

She says: He must've. He had all those women and even a bunch of guys following him.

I said: That's why I love you even when you aren't useful.

Yes, I ended up putting the sheets on the bed myself, once I got my niece and her iPod off of it.

Okay, anyone who has their DVD copy of Brokeback Mountain and who also saw it in theaters... Is it just me, or is that first sex scene in the tent a LOT lighter sitting at home than it was in the theater???

I remember being in the theater (both times I saw it) and feeling a tad disappointed that I couldn't see it any better. But then I had it home on DVD yesterday, and was watching it when... HELLO! No problems seeing all that yummy groping now! heh.

I should be a little more remorseful of my theater shallowness, but I ain't. I'm too busy being grateful for rewind and the magic of brightness settings on my television. I'll be deep and thoughtful another day.

That's the old Tail O' the Pup hotdog place in West Hollywood.

That hotdog stand lasted from the 1940's until just this year. Rumor has it that the building may show up again somewhere in Westwood. I kinda hope so. Something that obscene should live forever.

Okay, why aren't there people far and wide jumping all over Dana Rohrbacher? Bill Mahar clarified/asked if he thought of Iraq as a roach motel for terrorists, in that they check in but don't check out, as part of the party line mentality "fight them over there so we don't have to fight them here."

Rohrbacher wholeheartedly accepted that analogy. Oh yeah, nice one, Dana! Very comforting for the innocent Iraqi people we were supposed to be liberating from a horrible regime! Yeah, get rid of Saddam, the big bad nasty, but subject the people to a roach motel of terrorists. Why aren't people outraged by that? Why hasn't anyone stood up and called these assholes on their failure to utilize ALL the information in the National Intelligence Estimate? The one that gave them the excuse to go to war (by indicating there may have been the possibility of WMD but that adamantly stated that Saddam didn't have the capability to utilize what he did have and was NOT inclined to do so anyway if he did)?

Oh, and the immigration thing has me steamed. Someone should stop and let these kids protesting (and the adults, too) that Cesar Chavez fought for the rights of LEGAL immigrants, particular the migrant, Mexican-American workers. Chavez was actually opposed to illegal immigration, feeling that (surprise) it undermined fair wages for the legal immigrants. Sound fucking familiar? Jees, these kids and protestors are invoking the name of a man who opposed illegal immigration and are stamping his name on their cause! Yikes! Oh, and Chavez was born in Arizona, not Mexico.

While we're at it... migrant workers have little to do with the immigration debate now. Despite dredging up Chavez's name, the fact is that the farm workers do NOT comprise the biggest sector of jobs for the illegal immigrants. That honor goes to restaurant, hotel and CONSTRUCTION industries. I can guarantee you that there are American citizens who want those jobs. Ask my uncle and cousin who lost their construction business because they couldn't compete with the crews comprised of illegal immigrants. Those crews don't even have to pay minimum wage, let along union wages, or pay for benefits. By the way, my uncle and cousin worked out of Kentucky and Ohio, not CA, AZ or NM or Texas. Nowhere near the border. They had a buddy in Atlanta who lost his business and has trouble finding work for the same reason, there.

Oh, one last thing. Waving the MEXICAN flag in their protests does not illicit more sympathy from me. My sympathies are with American citizens, of all races and ethnic heritage. I would have much more sympathy for their plights if they waved the American flag and demonstrated that they want a piece of the American Dream and not just the American Economy. There's a difference, you know.

If the American Economy could genuinely stand it, I might not even mind the hit it takes from illegal immigration, because these people are here out of poverty-driven desperation, and no one should be that desperate. But from a practicality perspective, we can't take that hit. We just can't. Not now. Talk to me about it again when the far right extremists and big oil have loosened their own stranglehold on the economy.

Christmas is definitely early here at the Casa. I got The Price of Milk, and Bedrooms and Hallways today, and watched them both already.

I'm such a happy, giddy thing right now. So much hotness, all in one day!

( Spoilers, asses, gushing and girliness ensues )

I was incredibly fucking fortunate enough to get to see Brokeback Mountain last Thursday at a special advance screening in Santa Monica. Five days later, I'm still feeling so touched by this movie, and I know others will be, too, when they see it.

I really, really *don't* want to see a bunch of Brokeback Mountain slash though, and I know there's going to be some.

I'm kinda torn about the subject, in a way, though. I never, ever want to tell people what they should and shouldn't write about. I know if I was moved to write fic about it and some random chick scoffed at me, I'd flip her the cyber bird before tap-tap-tapping away at my keyboard. So I'm not trying to climb up on a high horse. It's just that in a weird way, I kinda feel as though no fic out there could possibly do justice to what's already perfect. Fixit fic will ruin the meaning of what the characters had to sacrifice in the big picture, and an abundance of sexfic will dampen the yearning (and how beautiful it was) that the lack of lots of sex or physical contact caused.

Ah well, I suppose the fic is inevitable, and I'll get over it, of course. And for those who do end up writing it, I just hope they get a lot of fulfillment out of it.