I'm also enjoying the fuck out of spn_gossip. The latest is that their prophet, the holy gossip columnist Ted Casablanca, has updated a blind item saga that was previously thought to be about our dear ones - Jared Potatolatke and Jensen Quackles. But shock! horror! gasp! it suddenly doesn't seem to be about them. Sacre bleu!



I know, Gaga, I am also amazed. But since Casablanca's writing makes very little sense, I'll explain. Wait, no, it is too long to explain. Let me sum up: SPN anons think Judas Jack-Off, star of a couple of Casablanca's blind items, is Jared. They also think Dashed Dingle-Dream (what did the English language ever do to Casablancas?), the spurned bf that Judas ditched so he could pretend to be straight, is Jensen. Naturally. Here, let their reference guide explain it to you. (Yes! A reference guide!)

Anyway, they've been freaking out all morning since Casablanca said via his Twitter theawfultruth yesterday that he would update another edition to the Judas and Dashed story, which he did! Alas, no one thinks Jared would go skydiving - and how quickly they turn:

It's not Jared and FUCK YOU TED for keeping us guessing for months!

FUCK TED honestly, he was totally pandering to fandom like other people said. What a douche.

Of course, some still believe.

Maybe I'm in the minority, but I still don't think this is a not to Jared. If it was that blatantly obvious, I think Ted would have NOTted him at the bottom.

The references to flying: well, Jared has been spotted in LA and NY so he's been flying a lot lately, Y/Y?

The 2012 movie reference could be a reference to the end of the world and thus a reference to the apocalypse on SPN.

"He's been flying a lot recently..." I am dying. SOMETIMES HE FLIES AND THEN, HE JUMPS OUT! BECAUSE FLYING COACH IS JUST LIKE SKYDIVING

But how can they doubt the blind items? The Sacred Text of the J2 relationship? Why would their prophet, Ted, deceive them? It must be the Gods themselves that are deceiving them! Testing their faith! Or hiding their gay! Jensen and Jared are screwing with Ted's psychic readings!

You know like mabe Jensen and Jared were 99% who their mole was and they spun this story to see what the person would do.

This story is SO out there it seems like something, no offense, Jensen and Jared would come up with.

Oh, THOSE BOYS. Skydiving! That's SO out there! Why, thinking they're fucking and their girlfriends are beards or lesbian beards or evil whores black-mailing them into marriage or just doing it for press and the money because CW stars make a lot of money and they were getting gay-married in CANADA THE LAND OF THE FREE AND MAPLE SYRUP BUT NOT FREE MAPLE SYRUP and you know their clothes match sometimes and so on and so forth - why, yes! That's much more plausible than skydiving. That is not out there at all. That is a perfectly logical, well thought-out theory.

And then it continues on next page... is Judas actually - dun dun dun - JENSEN? Who knows! Honorable mentions include "I'M A HAPPY TINHATTER AND I'M OKAY," "He's not just closeted... He's a MURDERER," and "double wedding lolz." And, of course, PANIC SORROW SUSPICION.

God bless the tinhats. All I'm left to wonder is, with Casablanca calling women dogs and joking about throwing them off planes... did he hate his mommy a lot or has SPN just seeped into his brain? Someone get MYSTERY-SOLVING TEENS on the case!

PS my cat is on top my monitor and she is adorable