Running Out Of Ink

Copypasta from wank_report:

Broomstick flyer is a fanfic writer who, along with her husband, writes HP fanfic that she like to read to her grandkids.

One of her best works was a fic where Hermione dies and is confronted by the children that she was supposed to have with Harry - and she realises what a shame and waste her life has been, and how terrible her kids with Ron are (Heaven sent).

Something even viler than that: The Potter blood feud
( Possibly triggering content under the cut )


Bet the grandkids will love that.

In a reply to a review to this very story, she writes:

Note to smedman, First I would like to say thanks for your highly intelligent review. Second I dont recall asking you to read this story, if you read my profile you will see that I write for my grandchildren, who it seems are far more intelligent and are able to express their likes and dislikes without being insulting, at least they dont resort to the sort of rubbish you posted as a review.
which means that her grandkids have read this very story. With her blessings.

Snape and His Fears. The original post is more or less okay, but there is a lot of insanity in the comments, especially about the incident with Hermione's teeth.

I give you The Dog that Didn’t Get Exonerated in the Night in which the usual Manip!Dumbledore paradigm is once again trotted out for display. For bonus lulz, marionros got good and wound up and blasted a few screeds about how that horrible fucktard Harry Potter is NEVER WRONG AT ALL NO SIR THE BOOKS NEVER SHOWED THIS (never mind that, uh, we do indeed read that in the "big reveal" scenes at the end of the books, that the gaps in Harry's (and therefore our) knowledge are filled in); she also doesn't seem to grasp the concept of a POV character who introduces us to the world in which he or she inhabits.

As seems to be par for the course, trying to find ways to prove that the Death Eaters weren't really all THAT bad and such, we get this bald-faced assertion:

So Grindlewald was the Dark Lord of his time, and Voldemort did a bid to the title a couple of decades later. Bagged it too (although I still don't get why everybody was so afraid of him. All that talk of 'he did great things.. Terrible, but great' and what do we get? A few murders of muggles and old women! A two-bit muggle crook can do better than that! The DE's would faint at seeing 'Silence of the Lambs'!).

*coughBULLSHITcough*

Voldemort did a hell of a lot more than "A few murders of muggles and old women", Ms Ros. He founded a terrorist organization devoted to overthrowing the lawfully constituted government of his nation. He counselled the commission of murder, torture, vandalism and property destruction by the members of his organization. Every action proved that power for its own sake no matter how convoluted the pathway was his basic justification. Else why greedily snatch at all elements of immortality? Even though he had his Horcruxes he wanted a Philosopher's Stone and had no compunction about drinking Unicorn blood.

But hey, why let the books speak for themselves when you can make stuff up? Example by means of this detour:

Sirius loathes Snape and calls him 'Greasy Git'. Harry loathes Snape and calls him 'Greasy Git'. We might assume that Neville also loathes Snape, but as far as I know, he never referred to him as 'Greasy Git'. Just because Neville loathes Snape but doesn't call him Greasy Git doesn't mean that those who do call him Greasy Git don't loathe him.

It's amazing how these fen can make it all about Snape amid meta about Dumbledore. The making stuff up is that the words 'greasy' and 'git' never occur together once in the books. Chew on that, Ms Ros, and quit substituting fanon for logical analysis.

Then The Corruption of the House System in which terri_testing takes a little sideswipe or three at James by insinuating he didn't respect his mother, and then goes on to basically portray Dumbledore in a manipulative light again. The actual logistical underpinnings of her assertions seem quite weak. How would, as she claims, a mass Obliviate work on twenty some thousand people? (Since that is, in effect, what she's proposing as the reason why nobody remembers what House Dumbledore happened to be in; she says (paraphrased) 'the spell works on books and memories')

My spork is in storage at the moment so I can't do more than take a few feeble stabs at these meta-pieces which probably have grains of truth, but which seem to be built on a helluva lot of speculation and more than a bit of fanon.

ETA:

Oh for chrissakes mary_j_59 came along and managed to bring in some of that ridiculous Four Elements of Nature theory as well as demonstrate just how badly she excels at Missing The Point.

Her comment is here and I'll be over in my corner of the universe, karate headdesking at the ridiculousness of her ability to ignore what the Sorting Hat and Dumbledore both said about Slytherin traits.

Son of ETA: I noticed a segment of the LJ comments over there segued into some very revealing comments made by the Snapefen. My JournalFen entry regarding what I saw is linked.

Just in time for Christmas, Blizzard has started selling World of Warcraft in-game items for real world money! That's right, you can get a Pandaren pet or mini version of the the terrible Kel'Thuzad. In addition to being adorable, they cost $10, and do absolutely nothing useful in game.

$5 from the sale of the Pandaren goes to charity, at least.

I know at least five people who have already bought them and I am ashamed for every one.

The next live Rifftrax show will be December 16, with an encore on the 17th. This time the theme is Christmas shorts! Tickets are already on sale at some theaters, but I guess the 13th is when they will be widely available.

...I love shorts! Also, this reminds me that I need to find my copy of Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, which is required Christmas viewing at my house now.

More here

Just a light wanky snack.

Facts:
(1) Hideo Kojima is the creator of the Metal Gear Solid series.
(2) He is a fan of Twilight.
(3) He will be in ur Pixiv, judging ur Twilight fanart. Also, winner gets an autographed copy of MGS4: Guns of the Patriots.

( Metal Gear fans: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO )

ETA: ONTD post. Thanks to: vitalitat.

Okay, I've seen a number of book rec posts here every now and again, so I was wondering - is there a community (either on LJ or JF - or both) that specializes in people asking for book recs (on fiction or non-fiction)? If there were something like that, it'd be great to see what people thought were good reads on any given topic.

Thanks!

PSA: Snippets taken from the wank report.

Old Portkey had a forum, and on this forum they had a thread. And with a self-righteous bleat here and some srs bsns there, the Harmoanians had their say.

PJLikesAUfanfic: I even got little one trained to say 'ron is icky and yucky and mean to Hermione' and she is so adorable when she says it too. At school they play the HP movies *1 and 2 only since the movies 3 & 4 and up would scare little kids in her Special Needs class* sometimes and she stands up and points at the TV and says it in the middle of her class and her teachers smile and nod and give her a sticker. I guess they have read the books too and know which couple is the right choice rather than the 'easier' choice.

WHAT THE HELL IS THIS I DON'T EVEN-- *stares*

I think my face looks like that dog that's trying to comprehend the sheer level of stupid up close he's witnessing.

What kind of person uses their children to validate their world of batshit? I mean, that's just a million degrees of Fucking Creepy, in my book.

I don't even want to try and wade through the rest of it but I imagine some of you will be more than ready to take out your sporks and apply some deserved ego reduction to these folks.

Meanwhile, I'll be over here. *karate headdesks*

ETA:

I want to point out that this icon from littleshebear is so very appropriate.

Over on FurAffinity Kitara makes a journal about the theft of her tablet (the original journal is on the bottom half and the update is on the top half). She says she lent it to Recca_se_li and it was then either stolen by Razr or Recca lent it to Razr. Either way Razr refuses to answer any of Kitara's emails or text messages on the subject. Kitara then updates same journal (top half) when she manages to contact Razrs roomate/master/girlfriend/sockpuppet knowstobite. Knowstobite insists that the tablet was given to Razrs by Recca as a parting gift and that he will only return it once Kitara gives him another tablet of same or better quality.

Recca says Razrs has also stolen from him and owes him money

ICEman goes on Heidi patrol and internet lawyers

Kitara posts another journal where she shares a conversation she had with Knowstobite The conversation is tl;dr but the gist of it is Knowstobite thinks Razr has done nothing wrong by willfully accepting and keeping property he knows is stolen and again insists Kitara sends a new tablet to Razrs before she receives the original back.

Knowstobite shows up to share her two cents

Knowstobite also posted a journal on the subject of the tablet
The edited version
Screen caps thanks to Nightfurson of the original version in which knowstobite tries to raise money to buy Razr a new tablet.

Screen capt comments from Knowstobite's first journal where we find out Razr just made over $200 dollars on a commission and can easily buy himself a new tablet with that money.
the furbuy auction (half a NSFW picture)

At some point Recca also started taking donation money to buy Kitara a new tablet even though Kitara explicitly said she doesn't want a new one, she wants her old one back for sentimental value. Questions are raised as to what happens to the donation money after Kitara receives her old tablet back. Unfortunately I can't find the original post where Recca says this, just a comment referring to it.

There is much internet lawyering throughout. 

ETA: There appears to be a happy ending after all Kitara posts a new journal saying she got the tablet back.

From the Beeb:

He sent a message - or tweet - to the user with whom he fell out, saying: "You've convinced me. I'm obviously not good enough. I retire from Twitter henceforward. Bye everyone."

(I can only imagine that there is a row going on about this somewhere, but as I am not a Twitter user, someone else may have to provide).

I read the strangest rant today. How strange you say? So strange no one can agree just whether it's even a rant at all!

OP replies to requests to clarify, a few times, while a brave idealist attempts first contact, before realizing only a sucker would try to breach such impenetrable walls of WTF.

A random potshot at someone's fic-writing skills prompts the best simile ever.

The more persistent commenters dig through the layers of Bizarro-talk until they uncover the truth: OP is... 'anti-criticism'?

PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE SMILEYS.

And shattered idealism is shattered.

ETA: aslongasitlasts has studied the people of FFR. He's like a magic 8-ball, in a way.

And wank_report has some too.

ETA2: Modly intervention. But he wants to be banned. No, really.

ETA s'more: Post got blanked and F-locked. Comm membership is open, though.

The ETA Apocalypse Now: Comments are being baleeted at random, and the original post is replaced by the preface to The Picture of Dorian Gray. It's the final troll blowout, people.

ETA Captain Obvious:: Oh, so that's what started it. Taunting the mod, and then deleting comments (A no-no in ffr^2). He's banned now, but you wouldn't know because the mod comment that said that is... deleted!

ETA Cry For Justice: There are 409 Google caches of the wank still with pre-baleetion comments. Saving the ones I can before they update.

From Offbeat Bride via Kotaku and solarbird</lj>.

Anli & Laura's Lesbian Gamer Geek Wedding

The offbeat bride: Anli, data analyst

Her offbeat partner: Laura, public servant

Location & date of wedding: The Old Stone House, NSW Australia — 5 September 2009

What made our wedding offbeat: We wanted a ceremony that reflected our geeky, romantic, pink aesthetic, while at the same time being profound and meaningful. Our ceremony was themed around the video game Portal and the anime series Revolutionary Girl Utena.

We incorporated lots of geeky details, from the table names (Revolution, Sierra, Katara and GLaDOS) to the choice of music. We also kept several traditional elements such as bouquets, dresses and bridesmaids. However, we both walked down the aisle unaccompanied and skipped the garter/bouquet toss.

...

And we walked down the aisle to an obscure piece of music from Utena.

Here's the music the couple used for their processional: Hikaru sasa niwa.

Go click on through to the Offbeat Bride story. There are lots of lovely photos, including a slide show.

As for the Portal part, a commenter on Kotaku pointed out, "So the cake wasn’t a lie afterall…"

After some consideration, I've decided to x-post this from the sparklefield because it's a very special kind of transcendent, as in...how is Twilight the first fandom to actually Go There with this sort of merchandising? Srsly.

***

I think I'll let the product speak for itself since I cannot -- well and truly cannot -- find the words:

You can now have RPattz's face buried in your crotch any time you wish. Think I'm kidding? Check out the completely classy detail painstakingly created for the panty lining.

*just looks at y'all*

Anthony Bourdain gets his own cartoon. :-D

Just Valve being awesome some more. This weekend, Team Fortress 2 is having a Halloween themed special with free hats to take from dead players. There is an egg* on the page which leads to TF2's backstory. Yes, this game now has a plot deeper than just two sides trying kill each other. As a bonus, the new page has another egg** that gives a nod to a popular TF2 character fanart.




~Egg spoilers~

* Zepheniah Mann
** Barnabas Hale

(Sorry if this has been posted before :P)

I was curious about why people at Portkey have Draco/Ginny as one of their "official" ships, so I went looking for their D/G forums, and found this list.

I've selected the most lulzy reasons out of the lot to avoid the tl;dr.

( LOLWAT )

It was really pretty goddamn clever.

( For those who dislike links )

Also, this was an ideal excuse to bust out my brand-new ZP icon.

Yep, popslash is still around, and it's still the best! And there's still a popslash SeSa -- not the original DWNOGA, but the authorised sequel, Make the Yuletide Gay.

Even if you don't usually take part in challenges (like me), then SeSa is the one you shouldn't miss. There will be resources and mentors for all, and all the cheerleading you could want. Plus, at the end of it, you get your very own lovingly hand-crafted story to enjoy, something written especially for you.

If you've drifted away from popslash, SeSa is the perfect time to get back in touch. Sign up and have a lovely couple of months of nostalgia. And then stay!

Sign-ups for Make the Yuletide Gay are open until Oct 30th.

On spitting_image, we're going to have a special Halloween post called Night of the Bad Comic Artists. Submissions will be compiled and the post will be up on October 30th at 5 p.m. PST. Please submit images here!

Machinarium is kind of a cute adventure game. It's pure point and click with some fun puzzles thrown in. Not very hard or long, I'd say about ten hours of play time. It lagged a little on my machine, which doesn't quite meet the minimum requirements, but nothing too bad.

You can try the demo on machinarium.net or buy it from several different sites. Costs somewhere between 15-20 euros.