Monday, February 20th, 2012 @ 5:44p
Rule and a recipe.
For reasons I can't get into, this rule came up in chat:Rule and a recipe.
Secret Fandom Wank Rule #7: If you kill a mod, you get to assume their position and their icons.
Addendum to Secret Fandom Wank Rule #7: Sep has bear traps everywhere.
_______________________
In other news, I'm telling people the recipe for Kitty Litter Cake, a family staple ever since my mom discovered the internet had recipes back when I might not have even been in double digits. The baby brother asked for it for his birthday! I'm currently working on a modified version to create 'dirt cake' (involves gummi worms) which is not a new thing, but I want to make one I really like. May involve little flowerpots.
Anyway, recipe:
Kitty Litter Cake:
Ingredients:
Packet of Vanilla Pudding
Two Cakes (chocolate and vanilla, or two marble cakes)
Cookies with cream inside (oreo, white oreo, off-brand)
Miniature chocolate bars or tootsie rolls
Object needed:
UNUSED litterbox
WHAT YOU DO:
Make pudding according to directions.
Make cake according to directions.
Grind up cookies (not too fine, but not huge pieces either. Don't make paste, I'm saying)
Place all three in litterbox and start mashing that all together. Add chocolate bars/tootsie rolls.
OPTIONAL: drops of green food colouring.
Serves small children best.
Monday, February 20th, 2012 @ 4:41p
Please enjoy this active flist attempt, Puipui
"Hi, I'd like a book with a female protagonist and no fat-shaming!"Please enjoy this active flist attempt, Puipui
Singe: "May I interest you in this male protagonist with fat-shaming?"*
"Hey, check out this John Cleese stuff!"
Singe: "Oh cool, I have icons of this racist guy's puppets! Anyway, I like the other guys more"
I'm starting to think she only posts drunk.
*Don't take this to mean I do not love the hell out of Pterry, but people do not keep quiet about the thickerset sort in his books
Monday, February 6th, 2012 @ 11:29a
Two icons I drew myself!
Fanfic writin' and Klartch the Griffin from Diana Wynne Jones' Chrestomanci series.
Saturday, January 14th, 2012 @ 5:52p
My current workspace
My current workspace
I have to write 30k words by March. Shit just got real.
Not present: My post-it notes for what happens where on the maps I drew, because I RAN OUT. I called my mom and went 'emergeeeeencyyyy' because I am ten and didn't want to get out of my pjs.
I try not to think too hard about why that remains an effective course of action.
Saturday, January 7th, 2012 @ 9:55p
Little Women aka What the hell are they doing now
For Yuletide, my friend Snacky wrote Little Women: IN SPAAAACE (that's what I like to call it, but it was actually a serious fic and it was quite nice! I heartily recommend it) and to help her, I started rereading Little Women which I haven't done since I was a tiny hamster determined to read the biggest book in the kid's section. Little Women aka What the hell are they doing now
I didn't finish it in time, but I did render aid in the form of 'have you considered separating scenes?' so I count that as a plus.
Right now I'm about halfway in of book one and I love it. I love the Marchs. I love the shit they get up to and how weird they are and Beth breaks my heart.
I described their main problems like this on the twitter: Meg is envious, Jo isn't being allowed to live as a man, Beth has social anxiety, and Amy is twelve.
This is my favourite scene so far, where the March sisters are putting on a play for their friends. Roderigo is Jo, Zara is Amy, and Don Pedro is Meg:
A good deal of hammering went on before the curtain rose again, but when it became evident what a masterpiece of stage carpentering had been got up, no one murmured at the delay. It was truly superb! A tower rose to the ceiling; halfway up appeared a window with a lamp burning at it, and behind the white curtain appeared Zara in a lovely blue and silver dress, waiting for Roderigo. He came in gorgeous array, with plumed cap, red cloak, chestnut lovelocks, a guitar, and the boots, of course. Kneeling at the foot of the tower, he sang a serenade in melting tones. Zara replied and, after a musical dialogue, consented to fly. Then came the grand effect of the play. Roderigo produced a rope ladder, with five steps to it, threw up one end, and invited Zara to descend. Timidly she crept from her lattice, put her hand on Roderigo's shoulder, and was about to leap gracefully down when "Alas! alas for Zara!" she forgot her train—it caught in the window, the tower tottered, leaned forward, fell with a crash, and buried the unhappy lovers in the ruins!
A universal shriek arose as the russet boots waved wildly from the wreck and a golden head emerged, exclaiming, "I told you so! I told you so!" With wonderful presence of mind, Don Pedro, the cruel sire, rushed in, dragged out his daughter, with a hasty aside—
"Don't laugh! Act as if it was all right!"—and, ordering Roderigo up, banished him from the kingdom with wrath and scorn. Though decidedly shaken by the fall of the tower upon him, Roderigo defied the old gentleman and refused to stir.
The copy I have is heavily footnoted, but I haven't been checking them out much except when something seems intriguing with a note attached. David Attenborough voice for footnotes: and this is where the author reveals she hates the Irish. Okay, they didn't say that exactly but that is what they do say. Apparently Louisa May Alcott loved everyone but the Irish, which is shown once in the story via Amy declaring that the Irish kids are her nemesis.
Sunday, January 1st, 2012 @ 9:51a
Yuletide reveals are up! So it's time to say what I wrote!TITLE: The Lion of Caprona and it was for Minutia_R.
FANDOM: Chronicles of Chrestomanci - Diana Wynne Jones
SUMMARY: Janet and Julia are studying abroad (with Klartch along for part of the ride), but something is rotten in the state of Caprona.
Extra Notes: Wow! The comments I got on this were amazing. Anyway, this was my first f/f fic (not really a huge thing, I just write pairings so rarely it hadn't come up), and that was awesome because I really wanted to participate in the Misses Clause Challenge, but I was only gonna do it if that was what my recipient requested.
A lot of this fic was me trying to plot it out like a DWJ story, because I've been so sad about her passing away and wanted to give the characters more adventures. I was afraid to say it in the notes, though, but there were so many comments saying I managed it that my heart grew six sizes this Christmas. And most of those comments came right before I went to bed, so I slept grinning a lot. :D!
I wrote a Chrestomanci story last year too, Millions of Cats that was also crossed with Howl's Moving Castle because I'd offered both those fandoms and my recipient had asked for both those fandoms and I uh, wasn't sure which one I was assigned.
IN CONCLUSION: thinking of writing a prequel to the Lion of Caprona to add to a mention I made in it and also because I want to write Marianne Pinhoe and that's the first idea that came to me. I'm just like, do I tag it as a New Year's Resolution fic or what? I do not know!
Also, drawing with crayon to help figure out character details is amazingly soothing. I got the round thingie of 150 crayons and it is the best decision I made last year. Also, when I was writing out my concept notes (I will not be linking that, as I managed to call Tonino 'Tonio' for most of them), I doodled little characters above. I made the Klartch into my icon you can see above.
Monday, December 26th, 2011 @ 9:50a
The Yuletide Madness fic that wasn't revealed yet is now revealed!Some kind soul wrote me Facts She Wrote, aka Jessica Fletcher facts a la Chuck Norris.
This is a thing that makes me happy.
Sunday, December 25th, 2011 @ 9:16a
Yuletide stories are up! And I just wanna rec what I got because they are wonderful.The Next Part of Your Story is a Murder, She Wrote/Neverending Story crossover and it is *amazing*. I love it. It makes me want to reread the book. I always want to reread the book. But the urge is so much stronger than usual right now. The author even zeroed in on one of my favourite sections of Bastian's time in Fantastica.
Up He Rose, and Donned His Clothes. Genderqueer Hamlet! It's exactly what I asked for. :D :D :D!
There's also a Yuletide Madness waiting to be unlocked. I'LL KEEP YOU POSTED.
Oh please let my recipient be as happy with what I wrote as I am with what I got.
Wednesday, December 14th, 2011 @ 12:25p
OH HAY THERE SANTA
Dear Santa Claus:OH HAY THERE SANTA
mood festive
It's that time again! Yes, the Demanding Time is upon us.
We both know I could have been better this year, but between you and me those Peanuts comics were just begging to end up on my harddrive. It was like a rescue. 'Oh help us all alone on this torrent site' and I'm all 'I can do this for you' and I do own the books. LOOK JUST DON'T HOLD THIS AGAINST ME. Also this year I held open like, a billion doors.
A billion.
Nitty gritty time!
Here is what I want:
1. Small wooden animals. I find them appealing.
2. Peace on earth.
3. The common sense god gave a gnat. I sliced open my fingers today by shoving them in a bag of soda and broken glass to fish out the unbroken bottle. I can't help but feel that this is a failing on my part.
Thank you for your time, Santa! Glad to do business with you again this year.
I appreciated the itunes card last year. It was v. thoughtful.
-Little John Harris, age 26
Tuesday, December 13th, 2011 @ 4:58a
I was looking across some writing advice while I worked on my yuletide (about 8,500 words and nearly done now), and found this little gem on writing villains:Nevertheless we mustn't forget that our villains are sometimes related to the hero or heroine. Tricky balance here because we are all aware of hereditary factors in human beings. The danger can be that doubt is built about the hero or heroine's ability to be heroic when they have such "bad" blood flowing in their veins.
To heck with you, lady. I ain't finishing this.
Tuesday, December 13th, 2011 @ 12:44a
If anyone's noticed, I haven't really called anyone a whore as an insult in years. I started thinking about it a long time ago, and realized that there was a lot of baggage attached to the word and even if I wasn't associating it with sexual activity, shaming, etc, it suddenly lost all its appeal in one huge SWOOSH.Just as a FYI that I wanna share 'cause I'm pleased I stuck by my decision like a real adult.
Wednesday, December 7th, 2011 @ 8:02p
Important News!
Important News!
REALIZATION
In other news, another deleted scene from the Yuletide fic*:
It was king of dinosaurs against king of dinosaurs! Roars tore through the peace of the night like it was so much tissue paper, followed by the first splinter of wood as a lance shattered against the hide of the old bull.
With a jerk of his massive gnarled head, the old bull got his teeth into the throat of the younger t-rex and applied sudden, deadly pressure. An inhuman almost undinosaur cry rang out and then the smaller t-rex fell, body twitching with dying spasms. Character 2 barely had time to roll off her dead steed to safety when the old bull slammed his foot down on top of his dead opponent in triumph.
"You've lost, Character 2," said Character 1 calmly as she looked down at Character 2. "Accept it with grace and abandon your mad mission. Give me the red diamond."
"You don't understand!" screamed Character 2. "You never did! Not in school, not when we were together, and certainly not now!"
"What didn't I understand, Character 2? Your knavery? You're right, I never did." Character 1 put steel in her voice, but she blinked back tears.
*That doesn't exist
Wednesday, December 7th, 2011 @ 1:39a
icon may have something to do with fandom, may not
Another deleted* Yuletide scene! Disclaimer: Characters are numbered by appearance in the scene and have nothing to do with who was who in the previous scenes. Thank you.icon may have something to do with fandom, may not
Character 1 lifted her sword. It weighed nearly nothing. Instead of cold steel it consisted of generated hard light, with an edge as small as an atom. Character 1 didn't know if it would be enough to stop Character 2.
Character 3, in all his wisdom, had told Character 1 that the Star Cleaver, as the sword was known, could take any enemy. Even one that was a eighteen foot killer android.
Character 1 sighed. It was one thing to tear that android apart, but it was another to face yourself after you'd torn it apart knowing that it was programmed with the brain engrams of your dead mother. And... deep inside, Character 1 suspected she was just as likely to slice herself in half with the damned sword as actually do injury to Character 2's metal carapace.
*of a fic that never existed
Monday, December 5th, 2011 @ 2:04p
Totally Not Made Up Yuletide Excerpt
As I work on my Yuletide, there's scenes that just don't make the cut*. So here's one of those delightful scenes while I continue to beaver away:Totally Not Made Up Yuletide Excerpt
Character 1 nodded to her opponent. Character 2 had stuck to her word and now sat on the back of her mighty steed on the other side of the jousting field, waiting for Character 1 to issue the opening challenge. Both women had chosen their tyrannosaurus rexes for the traits they found most useful in a mount.
Character 2 had stuck to her nature, choosing a rex that while it wasn't the largest of the herd, was clearly fast and agile. The t-rex, Character 1 narrowed her eyes as she looked at it, realizing it was a male, was a fine specimen, with long wiry legs that never seemed still, yet never unbalanced. Character 2 was stroking its neck the way t-rexes enjoyed, and whispering to it.
Strength, however, was Character 1's forte, as it were, and her t-rex displayed this trait in spades. It snorted and pawed the ground, its little arms waggling menacingly in the air. It was a huge bull, covered in scars, the veteran of many fights... of which it had been the winner.
"Character 2!" barked Character 1. The other woman's head snapped up to look at Character 1.
Character 1 continued: "We can end this now, you know. Give me the red diamond and this can be all over." She kept her voice even, but it was hard. "We'll never return to our world if you keep it out of some selfish desire to see your family. It won't be them, Character 2. It will just be shades that drive you mad."
"If you want it, princess, you'll have to take it from me!" yelled Character 2, dropping her helmet's mask down, readying her lance and charging!
Other news:
John's brain inventory in order of capacity taken:
1. Screaming on repeat
2. Procrastination protocols
3. Fidgeting protocols
4. Tea
5. consumerism
6. Booger production
7. Christmas music
8. City of Heroes and the making of shinies
9. Romancin' Angela Lansbury plans
10. Small birds
11. Trying to find out why my ipod keeps turning on shuffle.
12. Pear acquisition protocols.
13. Blank walls where thoughts should be.
----
110. Remembering to eat and sleep
*Also are totally fake and have nothing to do with any existing fandom
Saturday, December 3rd, 2011 @ 9:19a
Readin' the encyclopedia
Readin' the encyclopedia
The unicorn appeared in early Mesopotamian artworks, and it also was referred to in the ancient myths of India and China. The earliest description in Greek literature of a single-horned (Greek monokerōs, Latin unicornis) animal was by the historian Ctesias (c. 400 bce), who related that the Indian wild ass was the size of a horse, with a white body, purple head, and blue eyes, and on its forehead was a cubit-long horn coloured red at the pointed tip, black in the middle, and white at the base. Those who drank from its horn were thought to be protected from stomach trouble, epilepsy, and poison.
-Encyclopaedia Britannica
Things that don't sound like rhinos for 500, Alex.