Title: A Hundred Tiny Threads, Part 2/3
Pairings/Characters: Snape/Lupin, Minerva, Hermione, Bellatrix, minor omc
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Blinded in the final battle and stripped of his wand, Severus finds himself locked in a cell after the dust settles, feeling hopeless and no better than a Muggle. After a seemingly endless wait, he is finally allowed his "freedom" from Ministry incarceration only by, once again, binding his life to another's... but at least Lupin is better than the alternatives.
Warnings/kinks: Forced marriage, disability, H/C, first time, angst, romance
Word count: 20,000-ish (overall)
Authors notes: Snupin Santa gift for![[info]](http://www.journalfen.net/img/userinfo.gif)
lysa1. Post-war, canon to HBP (AU). Title comes from a quote by Simone Signoret: "Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years."
Part One, Part Two (this part), Part Three
Remus was surprised to find Severus sitting on the sofa again the next morning, and he fixed the man breakfast when he made his own. They seemed to fall into a pattern after that. Severus would remain in his room most of the day, but would come out at regular intervals for meals. They didn't talk much. Severus didn't allow for it, as much as Remus tried.
The first week was drawing to an end, and Remus knew what was coming. They both knew. The Ministry was, at least, not so stupid as to bind to wizards to one another without at least a trial period to make sure they weren't going to throttle one another, but the spell to bind them to one another was coming. It was coming once exactly one week had passed, unless Severus had reasonable objection.
They both had reasonable objections, he thought. However, fighting the details seemed a hopeless battle to Remus at this juncture, and there were many options other than Severus that would have been much worse. In fact, aside from the cold treatment, Severus wasn't bad at all. He was quiet, and decent company when he graced Remus with more than a few words at a time.
The morning of the seventh day was quieter than usual. Remus cooked in silence, and Severus did not break it. When Remus moved into the sitting room, he sighed. "You know, we can eat at the dining room table."
"There's a dining room?" Severus asked. There was something in his tone that made Remus feel a little guilty.
"Yes. Just through the kitchen," Remus said softly, "Shall we?"
Severus turned toward him, then sat up off the couch. Remus moved toward the kitchen door, and Severus followed behind him.
"If you turn-"
"I can follow you," Severus cut him off and did just that.
Remus wondered if Severus could see him, even if just a little. He hadn't asked.
Remus sat in one of the chairs and directed Severus into another before putting the plate down in front of him... and then the uncomfortable silence settled around them. They didn't talk much during meals, but there was a little conversation. Today it seemed they were both avoiding talking as much as possible. When they were done, Remus collected the plates and set them to washing themselves in the sink.
He turned back to Severus, watching him sit there for a moment before speaking. "I could... give you a tour... I probably should have done it sooner," he admitted.
"That would be agreeable."
"All right. Well, there isn't much in the dining room, save the table and chairs. In here..." He paused. How was he going to show Severus where things were? "Can you see me?" he asked.
"Oh, perfectly," Severus said, dripping sarcasm.
"Severus--"
"I can see your basic form," Severus said. "If it's light enough. I suppose I could follow you in darkness with the spell, if I just followed the only moving solid object."
"All right. The cooker is here," Remus said, moving to stand in front of it and feeling not the slightest bit silly for it. "Sink, cabinets, pantry," he listed off, indicating each by moving to it. Severus turned his head and followed his movement. "If you want to..." he started, moving back towards the kitchen door, and Severus stood and followed him through. "There's, of course, your room and en suite to the right, front door directly ahead, and a fireplace connected to the Floo in front of the sofa. If you go immediately left from out of the kitchen, you'll find the foot of the stairs, underneath of which there's the second downstairs bath."
Remus started up the stairs and Severus followed slowly behind. "There isn't much upstairs," Remus continued. "Just my bedroom to the left, the study straight ahead, and the bath on the right."
Severus stepped forward and into the study as the door was open.
"There's not much. Just a desk, a few books, and-"
Remus stopped when there was a knock at the door, and Severus turned back to look in his direction. Neither one of them spoke. Neither one of them moved. It was almost as if they both thought if they didn't move, whoever was at the door would assume they were gone and leave. It was a little silly, Remus knew, but there really wasn't anything to say, and he really didn't want to face what was waiting for them.
After a long pause, there was another knock. "I should get that," Remus said, feeling a little stupid for it. "Can you get back down on your-"
"I can."
"Right." Remus nodded at Severus and started back down the stairs.
He walked to the door, drew a deep breath and opened it.
"Remus," Cornfoot greeted, looking a little too cheery, and Remus wished he was less familiar with his name.
"Cornfoot," he replied. "I'd ask you to come in, but it seems you've already invited yourself," he added, when Cornfoot passed by him.
"Where is Mister Snape then?" the little man asked.
Remus wondered if he was oblivious to what Remus said or just ignoring it. "He's upstairs," he answered, shutting the door.
"How's it been?" Cornfoot asked, rocking on the balls of his feet.
"Fine," Remus answered. The more he saw of Cornfoot, the less he wished to talk to him.
Severus was descending the stairs slowly, sliding his foot forward on each step until he reached the edge, then stepping down. Remus mused to himself that Severus had probably gotten some practise for this in life, having always been so calculating and methodical. It would have driven Remus mad to have to move so carefully, which said a lot, as he was generally more reserved than most. Severus reached the bottom and turned toward them.
"Mister Snape, how has it been?"
Severus only turned to stare in the direction of Cornfoot's voice. It was funny, Remus thought, as he watched Cornfoot shift on his feet, that Severus could still look intimidating without words or even eye contact.
"Well, ah... I guess we should..."
Severus moved forward, and Remus held out his hand. Severus did not.
"What are my options?" he asked, and Remus dropped his hand.
Cornfoot gave Remus an apologetic look, but Remus only crossed his arms over his chest.
"You either consent to being bound to Remus now, or we move you to a new partner and see if that works out better for you."
"Who is next on the list? Surely you know where else you intend to shunt me off to."
"Ah," Cornfoot started, then pulled a slip of parchment out of the satchel around his shoulder. He scanned the page for what he was looking for. "We're running out of wizards in your age range. When a generation goes through two wars, people either pair off or die off." He laughed at that, and Remus thought it was a little inappropriate. "It appears that, while not nearly as safe a match, Charlie Weasley is the next-"
Cornfoot didn't have to finish his sentence before Severus held out his hand towards Remus.
Remus reached up and hesitantly took it. It was... strange. Remus was sure he'd never actually touched Severus before. His fingers were long and slender and cool to the touch. His hand almost felt delicate, and Remus tried to cover the little thrill at the feel of it in his fingers.
And then Cornfoot's wand was pressing into the side of his hand, and touching Severus didn't feel quite so... intimate, anymore.
Cornfoot started the incantation to bind Remus and Severus together magically. It was almost a musical string of words, lilting out of the man's mouth. Remus could feel something unseen wrap itself around their joined hands. It was hot and growing tighter as Remus wondered stupidly if he might crush Severus' fingers. Cornfoot preformed a little wand movement, and the sensation spread, the pressure sweeping through his entire body so quickly it nearly stole Remus' breath. Severus drew a sharp breath, and the feeling slowly dissipated, the tightness slowly uncoiling until they felt normal again.
No one spoke for a moment, though Severus quickly withdrew his hand as soon as the spell was done, the mildly surprised expression on his face melting back into a scowl. In spite of having known what was going to happen, having accepted it as an inevitability, Remus still couldn't quite process that he was now, effectively, married to Severus Snape.
*****
Minerva and Hermione had been by. Severus hadn't spoken with either of them, but he was relieved they had come, if only because each of them had brought things of use to him. Hermione had given Remus a set of Quick Quills to give him, and Minerva had shown up with a Daily Prophet. He wasn't sure who was paying for it, but the newspaper continued to show up on a daily basis. Remus tended to leave it on the dining room table for Severus after he was through with it.
He was starting to learn the layout of the home, so he wasn't using his wand as much to get around. Not that he spent much time outside of his room. He'd felt utterly useless during his imprisonment and move here, but with the help of a charm that essentially read for him, he was able to read the paper, and now with the Quick Quills, he was once again an armed man. Where his wand failed him now, his words most certainly would not.
It had been two weeks since they had been bound together and only a few days since Hermione had brought the quills. Just knowing the stack of coarsely worded letters were sitting on the small desk in his room, waiting to be mailed out, already left him feeling a little more in control of his situation, even if it was just the illusion of control.
"I need an owl," he announced without preamble, upon emerging from his room just before dinner.
The Remus shaped form, the only moving form in the room, shifted. He assumed Remus was turning to look at him.
"We can go to Diagon Alley and get one... or I can go, if you'd prefer."
"That would be best," Severus said. It wasn't as though Severus wished to remain in hiding even after being "freed," but he wasn't sure if it was safe to go to someplace that populated. It felt a little like putting a rather large bulls eye on himself
Besides, it would leave him to explore the house alone. Remus wasn't terrible company. He was quiet most of the time and a decent cook, but Severus still didn't feel quite at ease with someone else in the house.
"Are you hungry?" Remus asked after a long pause, and Severus nodded.
They hadn't broken the pattern they had been in at all. Remus sighed and stood to go into the kitchen. He couldn't help but wish that Severus might speak to him at times other than meal times. He knew it was too much to hope for, but it didn't stop him from wanting it. He'd realised in the past week how little he actually knew of Severus. There were a lot of things he thought he knew about Severus, but nothing real. He knew a little more now than he did before. He knew Severus took far too much sugar in his tea, and that he had a habit of pacing. He hadn't seen that so much as heard that. The walls in this house were thin and his extra sensitive hearing helped.
He finished cooking, not speaking, lost in thought. He hadn't realised that Severus was still sitting on the sofa until after he was done. "It's ready."
Severus nodded, and they both settled themselves at the table.
"What do you do in there all day?" Remus asked cautiously as they began to eat.
Severus didn't answer at first. He seemed to be considering whether or not he wanted to, which struck Remus as odd. Why did he have to keep so private, even now that the war was over? Perhaps, it was just habit.
"Writing letters, editorials and the like..."
That would explain the need for an owl. "To who?"
"The Ministry, the Daily Prophet... It seems that no one has yet questioned this law. Or, at least, the Ministry is keeping them quiet."
"Likely the latter." Remus shifted in his seat. "This could be worse."
"True. You actually leave me alone."
Remus smiled... and then he laughed. He couldn't help it. "Yes. I have little doubt that, while you can't hex my bollocks off any longer, you'd likely rip them off if you felt it necessary. I'm trying not to overstep."
Severus flushed, and Remus went silent, wondering if he had just overstepped by making mention of the fact that Severus was not allowed his wand any longer. He wasn't sure why it was a subject that needed to be danced around, but it apparently did. That, or perhaps the subject of Severus' hypothetical ire had been uncomfortable.
Remus didn't speak again until their meal was nearly finished, and then his voice was soft. "The full moon is next week."
Severus sighed and put his fork down, even though he wasn't done with his meal. He pushed back in the chair an stood. "I'll prepare a list necessary supplies for you." With that, Severus left the room.
Remus felt he was getting a little too used to the sight of Severus slipping in his door and shutting it behind him.
*****
Remus was starting to wonder if perhaps they needed more than one owl. In just the first week since purchasing her, Severus had sent the poor bird out at least twice a day, sometimes with multiple letters at a time. He'd written just about every wizarding newspaper, magazine, and wireless network he could think of, as well as both national and international wizarding law organizations.
On the plus side, Severus was spending more time in the shared parts of the house. Remus found that he was growing fond of even the terse instructions he gave their owl before sending her out, and the small bits of conversation he got out of Severus between trips to and from her cage.
"I think you ought to give her a name."
Severus snorted. "You give her one."
"All right. How about Irene?"
"Irene?" Severus turned towards him, frowning. "Most definitely not."
Remus smiled. Just like Severus to act like he didn't care when he obviously did. "Xiomara?"
Severus considered it for a moment. "Fine." He paused for a moment, shifted on his feet as if he might consider sitting down, but wouldn't. "Did you purchase the necessary items?"
"Of course, I did," Remus replied, and the reminder that they had to attempt to brew his potion this afternoon chilled Remus again. He wasn't a bad brewer, but he really didn't trust himself to pull off a successful batch of Wolfsbane. He really didn't know how it was going to go. He only knew he was warding himself in his bedroom under the most powerful ward he could manage, and he was going to ask Severus if he could ward him in as well.
"When shall we...?"
"We can do it now," Severus said, his tone more suggestive than commanding.
"Yeah, I suppose. I have everything set up in the dining room." After lunch, Remus had decided to get all the set up out of the way... and then promptly ignore it was there until he couldn't any longer.
"Have you been keeping the aconite in cold storage?"
"Yes, Severus, I followed your directions exactly."
Severus was torn. On one hand, he was certain that he was a good teacher... with students who bloody listened and did as they were told. He, truthfully, couldn't recall how Remus had done in potions in school, but he was certain Remus was as interested in getting this correct as he was. On the other hand, he couldn't help but feel a little disheartened that he couldn't do it completely on his own.
He moved to the kitchen, then through to the dining room and felt for the cauldron. It felt the right thickness, and Severus picked it up to feel the weight and thickness of the bottom. He couldn't help but sniff it, as well, not just to see if it was clean, but because he missed the smell of regularly heated metal.
He placed it back on the table. "You'll need a low heat under that."
"Right."
He heard Remus move, then light a match; the smell of sulfur hit his nose next. He started to give Remus directions, listening to the crunch of a blade through herbs. He tested each by feel before approving them. Remus was almost silent, he assumed in concentration. It wasn't until they were about halfway through that he had to touch Remus.
"There's a specific way to stir here," he said softly. "The stirring rod needs to be near the center of the cauldron," he continued. He couldn't stall. Time was an issue, so as soon as Remus confirmed that the stirring rod was where it needed to be, he reached forward to take the end of it, clasping his hand over Remus.
There was a intake of breath from across the table, but otherwise there was no reaction. Remus' hands were warm, and smoother than he'd expected, and he tried to ignore the thrill of the feeling. When was the last time he'd willingly touched someone? When was the last time anyone had willingly let him touch them?
"Keep me mostly in the center," he said, and he started the motion, Remus retraining his movement just enough to keep him center. He withdrew his hand as soon as was safe to, and brushed his hand on his trousers, unconsciously wanting to wipe the lingering feeling of Remus' hand off his own.
"It needs to rest for thirty minutes," he said, "No longer."
"All right. Shall I fetch you?"
Severus paused. He knew he should retreat again, but he felt uncomfortable leaving such a delicate potion, even if he couldn't see it, and their conversations were growing less and less tense lately. "Is there any tea?"
He couldn't see Remus' smile, but he could hear it, along with his surprise, in his voice. "Darjeeling or orange pekoe?"
*****
Severus had allowed himself to be warded into his room for the evening, and Remus did the same to himself upstairs. The potion did work, though it was not without its problems. He was in pain the entire night. He wondered if perhaps he always felt this way as the wolf and properly brewed Wolfsbane masked the pain, or if it was a direct result of the potion being off, but it hardly seemed to matter.
His body shifted back into its human form, and Remus collapsed in bed with a groan. Pain was radiating to every corner of his body and he couldn't bring himself to even get up and go get himself something for it. And then his head felt as though it was being smacked soundly and repeatedly with a two by four. He moaned, clamping his eyes shut and pinching the bridge of his nose before he realised the pounding wasn't pounding at all. It was a knock on his bedroom door.
"I- ohh." Remus fumbled for his bed sheets to cover himself, forgetting Severus couldn't see him in his modesty, and once he was mostly covered he spoke again, voice so hoarse he wasn't sure if Severus would even hear him. "Come in."
The door clicked open and Severus froze in it, that lost expression on his face again that he used to get when he first moved in to the house. He'd never been in this room before.
"I'm here. There's nothing in your way."
"You whimpered all evening. Is that normal?"
Remus frowned and closed his eyes. "N-no. It's not. It was unusually painful."
"What did it feel like?" Severus' tone was business like.
"I don't- Like something deep inside my body, like the center of me was on fire, and it radiated out to every place else."
"Too much aconite. You do realise the potion is essentially a poison and can kill even you in the right dosages, don't you?"
"Severus, I-" Before Remus even got started with his sentence, he was interrupted by the sound of Severus' footsteps descending the stairs. He looked up to see that Severus had moved out of the doorway, but left the door open.
Remus was tempted to shut it again. Why did he feel so embarrassed about being naked in his own home, when the only other inhabitant was blind? He squirmed a little at the thought, as it seemed to somehow float seamlessly into the memory of the way Severus' hand felt on his last night, the way it had felt when they'd been bound together... and then how he'd refused to even consider wanking to the thought. It was Severus, and he was only lonely.
Before he'd managed to get the energy to get up and shut the door, however, Severus reappeared, holding a bottle of pain potion, a wet rag, and a bezoar. Remus could only assume Severus had used a spell to read the bottles and the bezoar was one of Severus' own possessions.
Severus stepped across the room, stopping where Remus told him to (had Severus grown to trust his word that completely? It only just struck Remus now) and held out the bezoar. Remus took it and stuck it in his mouth as Severus unscrewed the cap of the bottle. The pain did not subside much, but his body no longer felt as if it were humming with it.
"You don't have to do this."
"Yes, I do. If you expire, they will give me to a Weasley."
Remus couldn't help it. He laughed, which caused his chest to ache and his eyes to water. Severus looked un fazed
"Besides, I won't next time. If this hasn't taught you how to follow instructions, nothing will."
Remus took the bottle from Severus, when Severus held it out, and drank about half... and then Severus did something he didn't expect. He knelt down, felt for Remus, and brushed the rag over Remus' forehead. "Likely running a fever if it was enough to make you ill," he explained.
Remus was tempted to say he could do it himself, but the wonder that Severus was doing it for him gave him pause to mention it. After plainly staring at Severus for a moment, Remus started to relax. It was soothing. He closed his eyes.
It was silent for a long time. Severus would occasionally pull the rag away and swing it in the air so that when he brought it back to Remus' skin it was cooled again. Remus' mind started to wander, and eventually he spoke again, his voice very soft. "You know, I spent the last year of the war hating you more than I thought it was possible for me to hate anyone."
Severus' movements paused briefly, and then began again after a moment.
"I'm sorry," Remus muttered.
This time when Severus' movements stopped, they didn't start again. "Sorry for what?"
"A million things," Remus replied honestly, "But that apology was for hating you when you least deserved it." Remus pulled the rag off his forehead, feeling already considerably better than he had before, though the ache in his bones would take time, not pain remedies, to get better again. He turned his head to see Severus simply staring.
"You were supposed to, Lupin," Severus said finally, and then he stood and left the room.
*****
In the next few weeks, letters were not only pouring out of their shared home, but pouring in as well. Severus' letters and editorials were certainly making the rounds, and Remus was certain that Severus' name being attached to them had garnered the sort of interest that they had. If it had been him, or some other witch or wizard, the letters might have gone straight in the bin as soon as they were opened if they were opened at all.
Severus was getting requests for interviews, and he was actually giving them as well. Remus might have been amused by it, if it wasn't for the constant string of Ministry approved visitors it brought to the house. If he was honest with himself, he might have admitted that a small part of him was growing fond of Severus being around, he was growing to enjoy the sound of Severus' voice even when he was speaking to other people, and it bothered him to see Severus fight so hard to cut him out of his life for good.
Remus was sure Severus would, and he was surprised by how much he didn't want that to happen.
The next full moon passed with far less pain than the time before, though the potion was not as good as Severus' had been when he could see. Severus met him the following morning and Remus lied and told him he was fine. He didn't want to make Severus feel bad. The first month it had been so easy for Severus to blame him, but if it he had continued to tell Severus he was in pain, Severus might start to get down on himself for not being quite as capable without his vision.
He staggered about trying to heal himself, all the while wishing to feel Severus' hands on him again as they were both times they'd brewed, and as they had been when Severus had mopped his brow with the wet cloth.
Severus' presence was clearly affecting his sanity.
Remus had lied to him.
It was a funny thing about being blind. You learned to pick up on subtle things that you might not have noticed before, like the hint of pain in someone's voice even when they told you they were just fine, thanks, and they didn't need your help. Severus stood in Remus' doorway for a long moment, debating arguing the point, but decided against it and headed slowly down the stairs.
Severus honestly wasn't sure why he even wanted to help. It wasn't as if Remus had ever been a friend, ever been anyone Severus would have gone out of his way to help before. Maybe it was just that he wanted to feel useful. He was doing what he could when it came to changing things outside their house, but when it came to things inside it, Severus felt at a loss, having been stripped of most of his vision and magic all at once. He didn't like accepting charity, and Remus was doing all of the cooking, the cleaning... Severus couldn't even brew on his own. The Ministry had succeeded in making him dependent on Lupin, but when Remus was recovering from his transformations, he could at least speed that recovery... he could at least serve some kind of purpose.
Remus had been grateful, as well. He could tell not only by the simple fact that Remus had allowed him to do it, but by the sound of his voice and the unprovoked apology. Severus couldn't remember the last time he'd helped someone and been shown immediate gratitude. He didn't need thanks when it came to the war. He didn't want the Order of Merlin. What he'd done was done. He didn't want grievances for past mistreatment and he didn't want people who honestly disliked him before to suddenly fall at his feet in thanks...
Even still, for that very reason, for the thanks he could hear in Remus' voice for what he was doing that very moment, helping Lupin had felt more satisfying than just about anything he'd done to help win the war.
*****
Another full had passed and Remus wasn't feeling particularly well. Severus had outright insisted on helping him this time, and Remus was appreciative, in spite of his protests. He wanted Severus' touch more than he would ever dare to admit, and he wondered where it was coming from.
A few days later, when he was up to doing more than the basics, he'd made them both tea. Severus was going over his notes for the interviewer that was coming by that afternoon (he'd stopped taking interviews the few days before and after the full). Severus had started spending more time in the sitting room since the interviews had started, and Remus was glad for the company, even if it was mostly silent, save the scratching of Severus' Quick Quill on parchment.
Remus handed Severus his cup and settled his favourite chair, curling his legs under him. He was growing used to being able to watch Severus without getting barked at, so he did, studying the frown of concentration on Severus' face until there was a knock at their door that caused Remus to jump and nearly spill his tea. He cleared his throat, set down his cup, and moved to the door.
The woman on the other side was short, with curly red hair, blue eyes, and a smile that was too wide to be genuine. Had Remus still been in the pack, he might have thought she was baring her teeth, not smiling.
"Hello," he said, when she did not speak. "I'm Remus Lupin, you must be-"
"Arabella Pur," she said, finishing his sentence for him, and then she pushed through the entrance right past him.
Remus shut the door and then turned to frown at the back of her head. If it were just him, he might have asked her to leave, but if he had endured Rita Skeeter for Severus, he could endure any manner of rudeness.
She stalked toward the dark shape on the couch until she could see Severus clearly. "Severus Snape," Arabella said, and there was something in the tone that made Remus nervous.
He reached for his wand, but before he could get to it, she had turned to point her own at him. Something hit him, first stealing his voice, then his vision, then finally control of his limbs and his balance, and he hit the floor with a thud. Remus could hear her pace away from him, toward Severus, but he couldn't do anything, and a slow growing burn started to course through his body.
"We meet again," she purred.
Severus heard the something hit the floor to his right, and he knew immediately that something was wrong that Remus was suddenly silent. He turned his head towards the noise, but then someone was touching him, caressing his face and... climbing into his lap, straddling him. He moved to shove her off, but ropes were quickly wrapping around his arms, tying them behind his back.
"Poor little Snape can't see me," she murmured, voice lilting, her hands petting his hair in a way that was meant to be patronizing, he was sure. "But it's doubtful he would recognise me like this anyway."
Severus couldn't speak. He wouldn't speak. His mind was too busy racing to come up with a plan to bother replying to her.
She leaned forward to whisper in his ear. "I assure you I'm still every bit as pretty as I was last you saw me on the battlefield. Do you remember?" Her fingers touched his forehead and slid down his face until they forced the lids of his eyes closed.
Bellatrix. Severus jerked away from her touch, finding the back of the sofa was doing a pretty good job of keeping him in place, so he did the first thing he could think to do. He bit her. He lunged forward and clamped his teeth down on her hand, and it felt like he'd hit the juncture between her thumb and forefinger. It was amazing how quickly he drew blood, and she cried out. It was satisfying to hear, but almost as soon as it started, it was over. Something was wrapping itself around his neck, a spell, squeezing until he choked and let go. The spell released and left him coughing, but Bella had shifted back a little, and she had her hand around his throat. It was warmer than the spell had been.
"Not. Very. Nice," Bella said, and something hot and sticky was dripping on his face now. "You'd look better in your own blood, I think, but we'll just call this marking my claim." She shifted off his lap and muttered the charm to heal the wound he'd made. He could hear her walking away, toward the kitchen. Of course, she wouldn't just kill him. She liked to toy with her food before she ate it, and Severus knew he had to think of some way out of this.
"Not going to talk to me?"
She was in the kitchen now. Severus could hear her shoes on the lino.
"No one believed me, did they? But I was right all along."
Something sliced through his cheek, and he clenched his jaw not to respond, feeling the blood trickle over his skin.
"I was right about you."
Another spell grazed the underside of his nose and he wondered if she'd aimed to cut it off as the blood began to run down his upper lip.
"Goodness... How could I have missed a target that size?"
"Witty," he muttered.
"I must be getting rusty since My Master has fallen," she said, not acknowledging he'd spoken. There were cabinets being opened and closed, it sounded like silverware was being rustled. "No matter, we have all the time in the world for me to practise."
Another cut sliced through the center of his chest. It was shallow enough not to cause major damage, but it was bleeding freely already anyway. He had to do something. Fucking Ministry thought he was a threat with a wand, and it was going to get him killed without it. Unless...
Bellatrix went on, but he wasn't listening to her. He turned his head to where he'd heard Remus fall, straining for any sound of movement, but there wasn't any.
"Oh, he'll be dead soon enough." Her voice was clearer. She must have turned and saw what he was looking at and had spoken while facing him. When she went on again the voice seemed to be aimed at the walls again, and he silently tried to Accio Remus' wand.
"I think I might cut out your heart like you did mine - only I'll do it by hand," she said, and there was more rustling of cutlery.
He felt something hit him in the side, something lightweight from Remus' direction. He shifted, gripping the thin wood in his fingers, and the ropes that bound his arms fell away. Turning to watch her form, he took aim at the shadow that seemed to be drifting lazily around the kitchen and cast an Incarcerous.
It missed. Severus heard it hit the wall.
"Oh, that was cute," Bellatrix purred, "Playing with a big boy wand?"
Her shadow shifted sharply, and something was hot around his neck. Flames engulfed the tips of his hair and were quickly licking their way up towards his scalp, smoking and blistering his neck, and Severus roared. He had to be quick with his Aguamenti, and even quicker with his own curse.
His Sectumsempra hit her this time, because he heard her hiss, but it must not have done much damage because she shifted again, just a wave of lighter color Severus knew to be her hand, and this time Severus deflected whatever it was she threw at him. It he could just watch her movements...
It was a good thing Bellatrix was never particularly subtle.
Another curse deflected, then another, and she was going to get frustrated with this soon enough, but Severus was trying to focus so that the next time he dared give up his defense to cast a curse of his own, he would hit her squarely... and then he realized he didn't have to at all if he cast a wide enough spell. He started quickly mentally thumbing through all the curses he knew. Crucio, Sectumsempra, and Avada Kedavra were all too specific, Fiendfyre, too uncontrollable, and he only wished he was close enough to cast a well aimed Conjunctivitis Curse.
Bellatrix roared as he deflected yet another curse, and then her form was getting bigger, she was getting closer, and Severus needed to stop her. He did the first thing he thought to do. With a flick of his wand, he cast a Reducto at the ceiling, hoping it wouldn't bring the house down on top of him as well, and the ceiling in the kitchen crashed in on top of her. Rubble and debris flew everywhere, and there was a sudden haze of dust in the air. The house groaned and creaked, but it didn't completely collapse... and then it was almost silent. He didn't hear her voice. He didn't see her form in what he could see of the debris, though everything had gone a little greyer, more washed out.
He waited for a moment, wand raised, eying the new mass of shapes for movement, and when he didn't see any for a long while, he slowly backed towards where Remus had fallen until his heel hit something soft.
He spun and dropped to his knees. Forgetting Remus' wand, he felt for Remus' shoulders and turned him, trying not to let fear seize his chest. His fingers slid across Remus' chest to his neck and he pressed two fingers into skin that was a little too cool. There was a pulse. Barely. He gripped Remus' wrist and Disapparated with a crack.
Suddenly, there was far too much white.
Severus had Apparated directly into St. Mungo's and was immediately at a loss for where he was. It didn't help that Remus' dead weight had pulled him to the ground as soon as they cracked into existence, but the white walls and white uniforms all blended together and there was very little Severus could make out, save some movement.
In his haste to get Remus to help, he'd forgotten to pick up Remus' wand again. He couldn't levitate Remus, and he wasn't sure he could carry him either. Even if he could he might wind up doing more damage if he didn't know where he was going. He reached up and snatched at something, someone, moving, and they struggled a bit, likely startled, but Severus held tight.
"He needs help. Bellatrix Lestrange." He might not have time to fully explain, so he hoped just the mention of her would get them moving.
"Al-- all right," the person he grabbed answered. A female. Probably young.
He let her go and in a matter of moments, someone, many someones, were pulling Remus away from him. Severus found himself not wanting to let go, not because he wanted to keep Remus from help, but because he wanted to follow. They pried his fingers open and off of Remus and helped Severus to his feet. He barely noticed he was being touched far too much by far too many strangers as he strained to follow the huddle of shapes moving away from him with Remus in tow.
He brushed them off with and almost unconscious gesture as soon as he was stable on his feet. They were saying something about taking him in to be looked at, but he wasn't paying attention. He was trying to follow the last bits of movement he could still assume Remus was part of. "Where are they taking him?"
"I'm sorry, sir, only family is allowed back, but you need to have "
"He's-" he started, cutting her off. His voice was tight, but then he swallowed hard. He didn't know why there seemed to be a lump in his throat, but that hardly mattered. When he finished his thought, his voice had dropped back to its normal register. "My husband."
Pairings/Characters: Snape/Lupin, Minerva, Hermione, Bellatrix, minor omc
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Blinded in the final battle and stripped of his wand, Severus finds himself locked in a cell after the dust settles, feeling hopeless and no better than a Muggle. After a seemingly endless wait, he is finally allowed his "freedom" from Ministry incarceration only by, once again, binding his life to another's... but at least Lupin is better than the alternatives.
Warnings/kinks: Forced marriage, disability, H/C, first time, angst, romance
Word count: 20,000-ish (overall)
Authors notes: Snupin Santa gift for
lysa1. Post-war, canon to HBP (AU). Title comes from a quote by Simone Signoret: "Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years."Part One, Part Two (this part), Part Three
Remus was surprised to find Severus sitting on the sofa again the next morning, and he fixed the man breakfast when he made his own. They seemed to fall into a pattern after that. Severus would remain in his room most of the day, but would come out at regular intervals for meals. They didn't talk much. Severus didn't allow for it, as much as Remus tried.
The first week was drawing to an end, and Remus knew what was coming. They both knew. The Ministry was, at least, not so stupid as to bind to wizards to one another without at least a trial period to make sure they weren't going to throttle one another, but the spell to bind them to one another was coming. It was coming once exactly one week had passed, unless Severus had reasonable objection.
They both had reasonable objections, he thought. However, fighting the details seemed a hopeless battle to Remus at this juncture, and there were many options other than Severus that would have been much worse. In fact, aside from the cold treatment, Severus wasn't bad at all. He was quiet, and decent company when he graced Remus with more than a few words at a time.
The morning of the seventh day was quieter than usual. Remus cooked in silence, and Severus did not break it. When Remus moved into the sitting room, he sighed. "You know, we can eat at the dining room table."
"There's a dining room?" Severus asked. There was something in his tone that made Remus feel a little guilty.
"Yes. Just through the kitchen," Remus said softly, "Shall we?"
Severus turned toward him, then sat up off the couch. Remus moved toward the kitchen door, and Severus followed behind him.
"If you turn-"
"I can follow you," Severus cut him off and did just that.
Remus wondered if Severus could see him, even if just a little. He hadn't asked.
Remus sat in one of the chairs and directed Severus into another before putting the plate down in front of him... and then the uncomfortable silence settled around them. They didn't talk much during meals, but there was a little conversation. Today it seemed they were both avoiding talking as much as possible. When they were done, Remus collected the plates and set them to washing themselves in the sink.
He turned back to Severus, watching him sit there for a moment before speaking. "I could... give you a tour... I probably should have done it sooner," he admitted.
"That would be agreeable."
"All right. Well, there isn't much in the dining room, save the table and chairs. In here..." He paused. How was he going to show Severus where things were? "Can you see me?" he asked.
"Oh, perfectly," Severus said, dripping sarcasm.
"Severus--"
"I can see your basic form," Severus said. "If it's light enough. I suppose I could follow you in darkness with the spell, if I just followed the only moving solid object."
"All right. The cooker is here," Remus said, moving to stand in front of it and feeling not the slightest bit silly for it. "Sink, cabinets, pantry," he listed off, indicating each by moving to it. Severus turned his head and followed his movement. "If you want to..." he started, moving back towards the kitchen door, and Severus stood and followed him through. "There's, of course, your room and en suite to the right, front door directly ahead, and a fireplace connected to the Floo in front of the sofa. If you go immediately left from out of the kitchen, you'll find the foot of the stairs, underneath of which there's the second downstairs bath."
Remus started up the stairs and Severus followed slowly behind. "There isn't much upstairs," Remus continued. "Just my bedroom to the left, the study straight ahead, and the bath on the right."
Severus stepped forward and into the study as the door was open.
"There's not much. Just a desk, a few books, and-"
Remus stopped when there was a knock at the door, and Severus turned back to look in his direction. Neither one of them spoke. Neither one of them moved. It was almost as if they both thought if they didn't move, whoever was at the door would assume they were gone and leave. It was a little silly, Remus knew, but there really wasn't anything to say, and he really didn't want to face what was waiting for them.
After a long pause, there was another knock. "I should get that," Remus said, feeling a little stupid for it. "Can you get back down on your-"
"I can."
"Right." Remus nodded at Severus and started back down the stairs.
He walked to the door, drew a deep breath and opened it.
"Remus," Cornfoot greeted, looking a little too cheery, and Remus wished he was less familiar with his name.
"Cornfoot," he replied. "I'd ask you to come in, but it seems you've already invited yourself," he added, when Cornfoot passed by him.
"Where is Mister Snape then?" the little man asked.
Remus wondered if he was oblivious to what Remus said or just ignoring it. "He's upstairs," he answered, shutting the door.
"How's it been?" Cornfoot asked, rocking on the balls of his feet.
"Fine," Remus answered. The more he saw of Cornfoot, the less he wished to talk to him.
Severus was descending the stairs slowly, sliding his foot forward on each step until he reached the edge, then stepping down. Remus mused to himself that Severus had probably gotten some practise for this in life, having always been so calculating and methodical. It would have driven Remus mad to have to move so carefully, which said a lot, as he was generally more reserved than most. Severus reached the bottom and turned toward them.
"Mister Snape, how has it been?"
Severus only turned to stare in the direction of Cornfoot's voice. It was funny, Remus thought, as he watched Cornfoot shift on his feet, that Severus could still look intimidating without words or even eye contact.
"Well, ah... I guess we should..."
Severus moved forward, and Remus held out his hand. Severus did not.
"What are my options?" he asked, and Remus dropped his hand.
Cornfoot gave Remus an apologetic look, but Remus only crossed his arms over his chest.
"You either consent to being bound to Remus now, or we move you to a new partner and see if that works out better for you."
"Who is next on the list? Surely you know where else you intend to shunt me off to."
"Ah," Cornfoot started, then pulled a slip of parchment out of the satchel around his shoulder. He scanned the page for what he was looking for. "We're running out of wizards in your age range. When a generation goes through two wars, people either pair off or die off." He laughed at that, and Remus thought it was a little inappropriate. "It appears that, while not nearly as safe a match, Charlie Weasley is the next-"
Cornfoot didn't have to finish his sentence before Severus held out his hand towards Remus.
Remus reached up and hesitantly took it. It was... strange. Remus was sure he'd never actually touched Severus before. His fingers were long and slender and cool to the touch. His hand almost felt delicate, and Remus tried to cover the little thrill at the feel of it in his fingers.
And then Cornfoot's wand was pressing into the side of his hand, and touching Severus didn't feel quite so... intimate, anymore.
Cornfoot started the incantation to bind Remus and Severus together magically. It was almost a musical string of words, lilting out of the man's mouth. Remus could feel something unseen wrap itself around their joined hands. It was hot and growing tighter as Remus wondered stupidly if he might crush Severus' fingers. Cornfoot preformed a little wand movement, and the sensation spread, the pressure sweeping through his entire body so quickly it nearly stole Remus' breath. Severus drew a sharp breath, and the feeling slowly dissipated, the tightness slowly uncoiling until they felt normal again.
No one spoke for a moment, though Severus quickly withdrew his hand as soon as the spell was done, the mildly surprised expression on his face melting back into a scowl. In spite of having known what was going to happen, having accepted it as an inevitability, Remus still couldn't quite process that he was now, effectively, married to Severus Snape.
*****
Minerva and Hermione had been by. Severus hadn't spoken with either of them, but he was relieved they had come, if only because each of them had brought things of use to him. Hermione had given Remus a set of Quick Quills to give him, and Minerva had shown up with a Daily Prophet. He wasn't sure who was paying for it, but the newspaper continued to show up on a daily basis. Remus tended to leave it on the dining room table for Severus after he was through with it.
He was starting to learn the layout of the home, so he wasn't using his wand as much to get around. Not that he spent much time outside of his room. He'd felt utterly useless during his imprisonment and move here, but with the help of a charm that essentially read for him, he was able to read the paper, and now with the Quick Quills, he was once again an armed man. Where his wand failed him now, his words most certainly would not.
It had been two weeks since they had been bound together and only a few days since Hermione had brought the quills. Just knowing the stack of coarsely worded letters were sitting on the small desk in his room, waiting to be mailed out, already left him feeling a little more in control of his situation, even if it was just the illusion of control.
"I need an owl," he announced without preamble, upon emerging from his room just before dinner.
The Remus shaped form, the only moving form in the room, shifted. He assumed Remus was turning to look at him.
"We can go to Diagon Alley and get one... or I can go, if you'd prefer."
"That would be best," Severus said. It wasn't as though Severus wished to remain in hiding even after being "freed," but he wasn't sure if it was safe to go to someplace that populated. It felt a little like putting a rather large bulls eye on himself
Besides, it would leave him to explore the house alone. Remus wasn't terrible company. He was quiet most of the time and a decent cook, but Severus still didn't feel quite at ease with someone else in the house.
"Are you hungry?" Remus asked after a long pause, and Severus nodded.
They hadn't broken the pattern they had been in at all. Remus sighed and stood to go into the kitchen. He couldn't help but wish that Severus might speak to him at times other than meal times. He knew it was too much to hope for, but it didn't stop him from wanting it. He'd realised in the past week how little he actually knew of Severus. There were a lot of things he thought he knew about Severus, but nothing real. He knew a little more now than he did before. He knew Severus took far too much sugar in his tea, and that he had a habit of pacing. He hadn't seen that so much as heard that. The walls in this house were thin and his extra sensitive hearing helped.
He finished cooking, not speaking, lost in thought. He hadn't realised that Severus was still sitting on the sofa until after he was done. "It's ready."
Severus nodded, and they both settled themselves at the table.
"What do you do in there all day?" Remus asked cautiously as they began to eat.
Severus didn't answer at first. He seemed to be considering whether or not he wanted to, which struck Remus as odd. Why did he have to keep so private, even now that the war was over? Perhaps, it was just habit.
"Writing letters, editorials and the like..."
That would explain the need for an owl. "To who?"
"The Ministry, the Daily Prophet... It seems that no one has yet questioned this law. Or, at least, the Ministry is keeping them quiet."
"Likely the latter." Remus shifted in his seat. "This could be worse."
"True. You actually leave me alone."
Remus smiled... and then he laughed. He couldn't help it. "Yes. I have little doubt that, while you can't hex my bollocks off any longer, you'd likely rip them off if you felt it necessary. I'm trying not to overstep."
Severus flushed, and Remus went silent, wondering if he had just overstepped by making mention of the fact that Severus was not allowed his wand any longer. He wasn't sure why it was a subject that needed to be danced around, but it apparently did. That, or perhaps the subject of Severus' hypothetical ire had been uncomfortable.
Remus didn't speak again until their meal was nearly finished, and then his voice was soft. "The full moon is next week."
Severus sighed and put his fork down, even though he wasn't done with his meal. He pushed back in the chair an stood. "I'll prepare a list necessary supplies for you." With that, Severus left the room.
Remus felt he was getting a little too used to the sight of Severus slipping in his door and shutting it behind him.
*****
Remus was starting to wonder if perhaps they needed more than one owl. In just the first week since purchasing her, Severus had sent the poor bird out at least twice a day, sometimes with multiple letters at a time. He'd written just about every wizarding newspaper, magazine, and wireless network he could think of, as well as both national and international wizarding law organizations.
On the plus side, Severus was spending more time in the shared parts of the house. Remus found that he was growing fond of even the terse instructions he gave their owl before sending her out, and the small bits of conversation he got out of Severus between trips to and from her cage.
"I think you ought to give her a name."
Severus snorted. "You give her one."
"All right. How about Irene?"
"Irene?" Severus turned towards him, frowning. "Most definitely not."
Remus smiled. Just like Severus to act like he didn't care when he obviously did. "Xiomara?"
Severus considered it for a moment. "Fine." He paused for a moment, shifted on his feet as if he might consider sitting down, but wouldn't. "Did you purchase the necessary items?"
"Of course, I did," Remus replied, and the reminder that they had to attempt to brew his potion this afternoon chilled Remus again. He wasn't a bad brewer, but he really didn't trust himself to pull off a successful batch of Wolfsbane. He really didn't know how it was going to go. He only knew he was warding himself in his bedroom under the most powerful ward he could manage, and he was going to ask Severus if he could ward him in as well.
"When shall we...?"
"We can do it now," Severus said, his tone more suggestive than commanding.
"Yeah, I suppose. I have everything set up in the dining room." After lunch, Remus had decided to get all the set up out of the way... and then promptly ignore it was there until he couldn't any longer.
"Have you been keeping the aconite in cold storage?"
"Yes, Severus, I followed your directions exactly."
Severus was torn. On one hand, he was certain that he was a good teacher... with students who bloody listened and did as they were told. He, truthfully, couldn't recall how Remus had done in potions in school, but he was certain Remus was as interested in getting this correct as he was. On the other hand, he couldn't help but feel a little disheartened that he couldn't do it completely on his own.
He moved to the kitchen, then through to the dining room and felt for the cauldron. It felt the right thickness, and Severus picked it up to feel the weight and thickness of the bottom. He couldn't help but sniff it, as well, not just to see if it was clean, but because he missed the smell of regularly heated metal.
He placed it back on the table. "You'll need a low heat under that."
"Right."
He heard Remus move, then light a match; the smell of sulfur hit his nose next. He started to give Remus directions, listening to the crunch of a blade through herbs. He tested each by feel before approving them. Remus was almost silent, he assumed in concentration. It wasn't until they were about halfway through that he had to touch Remus.
"There's a specific way to stir here," he said softly. "The stirring rod needs to be near the center of the cauldron," he continued. He couldn't stall. Time was an issue, so as soon as Remus confirmed that the stirring rod was where it needed to be, he reached forward to take the end of it, clasping his hand over Remus.
There was a intake of breath from across the table, but otherwise there was no reaction. Remus' hands were warm, and smoother than he'd expected, and he tried to ignore the thrill of the feeling. When was the last time he'd willingly touched someone? When was the last time anyone had willingly let him touch them?
"Keep me mostly in the center," he said, and he started the motion, Remus retraining his movement just enough to keep him center. He withdrew his hand as soon as was safe to, and brushed his hand on his trousers, unconsciously wanting to wipe the lingering feeling of Remus' hand off his own.
"It needs to rest for thirty minutes," he said, "No longer."
"All right. Shall I fetch you?"
Severus paused. He knew he should retreat again, but he felt uncomfortable leaving such a delicate potion, even if he couldn't see it, and their conversations were growing less and less tense lately. "Is there any tea?"
He couldn't see Remus' smile, but he could hear it, along with his surprise, in his voice. "Darjeeling or orange pekoe?"
*****
Severus had allowed himself to be warded into his room for the evening, and Remus did the same to himself upstairs. The potion did work, though it was not without its problems. He was in pain the entire night. He wondered if perhaps he always felt this way as the wolf and properly brewed Wolfsbane masked the pain, or if it was a direct result of the potion being off, but it hardly seemed to matter.
His body shifted back into its human form, and Remus collapsed in bed with a groan. Pain was radiating to every corner of his body and he couldn't bring himself to even get up and go get himself something for it. And then his head felt as though it was being smacked soundly and repeatedly with a two by four. He moaned, clamping his eyes shut and pinching the bridge of his nose before he realised the pounding wasn't pounding at all. It was a knock on his bedroom door.
"I- ohh." Remus fumbled for his bed sheets to cover himself, forgetting Severus couldn't see him in his modesty, and once he was mostly covered he spoke again, voice so hoarse he wasn't sure if Severus would even hear him. "Come in."
The door clicked open and Severus froze in it, that lost expression on his face again that he used to get when he first moved in to the house. He'd never been in this room before.
"I'm here. There's nothing in your way."
"You whimpered all evening. Is that normal?"
Remus frowned and closed his eyes. "N-no. It's not. It was unusually painful."
"What did it feel like?" Severus' tone was business like.
"I don't- Like something deep inside my body, like the center of me was on fire, and it radiated out to every place else."
"Too much aconite. You do realise the potion is essentially a poison and can kill even you in the right dosages, don't you?"
"Severus, I-" Before Remus even got started with his sentence, he was interrupted by the sound of Severus' footsteps descending the stairs. He looked up to see that Severus had moved out of the doorway, but left the door open.
Remus was tempted to shut it again. Why did he feel so embarrassed about being naked in his own home, when the only other inhabitant was blind? He squirmed a little at the thought, as it seemed to somehow float seamlessly into the memory of the way Severus' hand felt on his last night, the way it had felt when they'd been bound together... and then how he'd refused to even consider wanking to the thought. It was Severus, and he was only lonely.
Before he'd managed to get the energy to get up and shut the door, however, Severus reappeared, holding a bottle of pain potion, a wet rag, and a bezoar. Remus could only assume Severus had used a spell to read the bottles and the bezoar was one of Severus' own possessions.
Severus stepped across the room, stopping where Remus told him to (had Severus grown to trust his word that completely? It only just struck Remus now) and held out the bezoar. Remus took it and stuck it in his mouth as Severus unscrewed the cap of the bottle. The pain did not subside much, but his body no longer felt as if it were humming with it.
"You don't have to do this."
"Yes, I do. If you expire, they will give me to a Weasley."
Remus couldn't help it. He laughed, which caused his chest to ache and his eyes to water. Severus looked un fazed
"Besides, I won't next time. If this hasn't taught you how to follow instructions, nothing will."
Remus took the bottle from Severus, when Severus held it out, and drank about half... and then Severus did something he didn't expect. He knelt down, felt for Remus, and brushed the rag over Remus' forehead. "Likely running a fever if it was enough to make you ill," he explained.
Remus was tempted to say he could do it himself, but the wonder that Severus was doing it for him gave him pause to mention it. After plainly staring at Severus for a moment, Remus started to relax. It was soothing. He closed his eyes.
It was silent for a long time. Severus would occasionally pull the rag away and swing it in the air so that when he brought it back to Remus' skin it was cooled again. Remus' mind started to wander, and eventually he spoke again, his voice very soft. "You know, I spent the last year of the war hating you more than I thought it was possible for me to hate anyone."
Severus' movements paused briefly, and then began again after a moment.
"I'm sorry," Remus muttered.
This time when Severus' movements stopped, they didn't start again. "Sorry for what?"
"A million things," Remus replied honestly, "But that apology was for hating you when you least deserved it." Remus pulled the rag off his forehead, feeling already considerably better than he had before, though the ache in his bones would take time, not pain remedies, to get better again. He turned his head to see Severus simply staring.
"You were supposed to, Lupin," Severus said finally, and then he stood and left the room.
*****
In the next few weeks, letters were not only pouring out of their shared home, but pouring in as well. Severus' letters and editorials were certainly making the rounds, and Remus was certain that Severus' name being attached to them had garnered the sort of interest that they had. If it had been him, or some other witch or wizard, the letters might have gone straight in the bin as soon as they were opened if they were opened at all.
Severus was getting requests for interviews, and he was actually giving them as well. Remus might have been amused by it, if it wasn't for the constant string of Ministry approved visitors it brought to the house. If he was honest with himself, he might have admitted that a small part of him was growing fond of Severus being around, he was growing to enjoy the sound of Severus' voice even when he was speaking to other people, and it bothered him to see Severus fight so hard to cut him out of his life for good.
Remus was sure Severus would, and he was surprised by how much he didn't want that to happen.
The next full moon passed with far less pain than the time before, though the potion was not as good as Severus' had been when he could see. Severus met him the following morning and Remus lied and told him he was fine. He didn't want to make Severus feel bad. The first month it had been so easy for Severus to blame him, but if it he had continued to tell Severus he was in pain, Severus might start to get down on himself for not being quite as capable without his vision.
He staggered about trying to heal himself, all the while wishing to feel Severus' hands on him again as they were both times they'd brewed, and as they had been when Severus had mopped his brow with the wet cloth.
Severus' presence was clearly affecting his sanity.
Remus had lied to him.
It was a funny thing about being blind. You learned to pick up on subtle things that you might not have noticed before, like the hint of pain in someone's voice even when they told you they were just fine, thanks, and they didn't need your help. Severus stood in Remus' doorway for a long moment, debating arguing the point, but decided against it and headed slowly down the stairs.
Severus honestly wasn't sure why he even wanted to help. It wasn't as if Remus had ever been a friend, ever been anyone Severus would have gone out of his way to help before. Maybe it was just that he wanted to feel useful. He was doing what he could when it came to changing things outside their house, but when it came to things inside it, Severus felt at a loss, having been stripped of most of his vision and magic all at once. He didn't like accepting charity, and Remus was doing all of the cooking, the cleaning... Severus couldn't even brew on his own. The Ministry had succeeded in making him dependent on Lupin, but when Remus was recovering from his transformations, he could at least speed that recovery... he could at least serve some kind of purpose.
Remus had been grateful, as well. He could tell not only by the simple fact that Remus had allowed him to do it, but by the sound of his voice and the unprovoked apology. Severus couldn't remember the last time he'd helped someone and been shown immediate gratitude. He didn't need thanks when it came to the war. He didn't want the Order of Merlin. What he'd done was done. He didn't want grievances for past mistreatment and he didn't want people who honestly disliked him before to suddenly fall at his feet in thanks...
Even still, for that very reason, for the thanks he could hear in Remus' voice for what he was doing that very moment, helping Lupin had felt more satisfying than just about anything he'd done to help win the war.
*****
Another full had passed and Remus wasn't feeling particularly well. Severus had outright insisted on helping him this time, and Remus was appreciative, in spite of his protests. He wanted Severus' touch more than he would ever dare to admit, and he wondered where it was coming from.
A few days later, when he was up to doing more than the basics, he'd made them both tea. Severus was going over his notes for the interviewer that was coming by that afternoon (he'd stopped taking interviews the few days before and after the full). Severus had started spending more time in the sitting room since the interviews had started, and Remus was glad for the company, even if it was mostly silent, save the scratching of Severus' Quick Quill on parchment.
Remus handed Severus his cup and settled his favourite chair, curling his legs under him. He was growing used to being able to watch Severus without getting barked at, so he did, studying the frown of concentration on Severus' face until there was a knock at their door that caused Remus to jump and nearly spill his tea. He cleared his throat, set down his cup, and moved to the door.
The woman on the other side was short, with curly red hair, blue eyes, and a smile that was too wide to be genuine. Had Remus still been in the pack, he might have thought she was baring her teeth, not smiling.
"Hello," he said, when she did not speak. "I'm Remus Lupin, you must be-"
"Arabella Pur," she said, finishing his sentence for him, and then she pushed through the entrance right past him.
Remus shut the door and then turned to frown at the back of her head. If it were just him, he might have asked her to leave, but if he had endured Rita Skeeter for Severus, he could endure any manner of rudeness.
She stalked toward the dark shape on the couch until she could see Severus clearly. "Severus Snape," Arabella said, and there was something in the tone that made Remus nervous.
He reached for his wand, but before he could get to it, she had turned to point her own at him. Something hit him, first stealing his voice, then his vision, then finally control of his limbs and his balance, and he hit the floor with a thud. Remus could hear her pace away from him, toward Severus, but he couldn't do anything, and a slow growing burn started to course through his body.
"We meet again," she purred.
Severus heard the something hit the floor to his right, and he knew immediately that something was wrong that Remus was suddenly silent. He turned his head towards the noise, but then someone was touching him, caressing his face and... climbing into his lap, straddling him. He moved to shove her off, but ropes were quickly wrapping around his arms, tying them behind his back.
"Poor little Snape can't see me," she murmured, voice lilting, her hands petting his hair in a way that was meant to be patronizing, he was sure. "But it's doubtful he would recognise me like this anyway."
Severus couldn't speak. He wouldn't speak. His mind was too busy racing to come up with a plan to bother replying to her.
She leaned forward to whisper in his ear. "I assure you I'm still every bit as pretty as I was last you saw me on the battlefield. Do you remember?" Her fingers touched his forehead and slid down his face until they forced the lids of his eyes closed.
Bellatrix. Severus jerked away from her touch, finding the back of the sofa was doing a pretty good job of keeping him in place, so he did the first thing he could think to do. He bit her. He lunged forward and clamped his teeth down on her hand, and it felt like he'd hit the juncture between her thumb and forefinger. It was amazing how quickly he drew blood, and she cried out. It was satisfying to hear, but almost as soon as it started, it was over. Something was wrapping itself around his neck, a spell, squeezing until he choked and let go. The spell released and left him coughing, but Bella had shifted back a little, and she had her hand around his throat. It was warmer than the spell had been.
"Not. Very. Nice," Bella said, and something hot and sticky was dripping on his face now. "You'd look better in your own blood, I think, but we'll just call this marking my claim." She shifted off his lap and muttered the charm to heal the wound he'd made. He could hear her walking away, toward the kitchen. Of course, she wouldn't just kill him. She liked to toy with her food before she ate it, and Severus knew he had to think of some way out of this.
"Not going to talk to me?"
She was in the kitchen now. Severus could hear her shoes on the lino.
"No one believed me, did they? But I was right all along."
Something sliced through his cheek, and he clenched his jaw not to respond, feeling the blood trickle over his skin.
"I was right about you."
Another spell grazed the underside of his nose and he wondered if she'd aimed to cut it off as the blood began to run down his upper lip.
"Goodness... How could I have missed a target that size?"
"Witty," he muttered.
"I must be getting rusty since My Master has fallen," she said, not acknowledging he'd spoken. There were cabinets being opened and closed, it sounded like silverware was being rustled. "No matter, we have all the time in the world for me to practise."
Another cut sliced through the center of his chest. It was shallow enough not to cause major damage, but it was bleeding freely already anyway. He had to do something. Fucking Ministry thought he was a threat with a wand, and it was going to get him killed without it. Unless...
Bellatrix went on, but he wasn't listening to her. He turned his head to where he'd heard Remus fall, straining for any sound of movement, but there wasn't any.
"Oh, he'll be dead soon enough." Her voice was clearer. She must have turned and saw what he was looking at and had spoken while facing him. When she went on again the voice seemed to be aimed at the walls again, and he silently tried to Accio Remus' wand.
"I think I might cut out your heart like you did mine - only I'll do it by hand," she said, and there was more rustling of cutlery.
He felt something hit him in the side, something lightweight from Remus' direction. He shifted, gripping the thin wood in his fingers, and the ropes that bound his arms fell away. Turning to watch her form, he took aim at the shadow that seemed to be drifting lazily around the kitchen and cast an Incarcerous.
It missed. Severus heard it hit the wall.
"Oh, that was cute," Bellatrix purred, "Playing with a big boy wand?"
Her shadow shifted sharply, and something was hot around his neck. Flames engulfed the tips of his hair and were quickly licking their way up towards his scalp, smoking and blistering his neck, and Severus roared. He had to be quick with his Aguamenti, and even quicker with his own curse.
His Sectumsempra hit her this time, because he heard her hiss, but it must not have done much damage because she shifted again, just a wave of lighter color Severus knew to be her hand, and this time Severus deflected whatever it was she threw at him. It he could just watch her movements...
It was a good thing Bellatrix was never particularly subtle.
Another curse deflected, then another, and she was going to get frustrated with this soon enough, but Severus was trying to focus so that the next time he dared give up his defense to cast a curse of his own, he would hit her squarely... and then he realized he didn't have to at all if he cast a wide enough spell. He started quickly mentally thumbing through all the curses he knew. Crucio, Sectumsempra, and Avada Kedavra were all too specific, Fiendfyre, too uncontrollable, and he only wished he was close enough to cast a well aimed Conjunctivitis Curse.
Bellatrix roared as he deflected yet another curse, and then her form was getting bigger, she was getting closer, and Severus needed to stop her. He did the first thing he thought to do. With a flick of his wand, he cast a Reducto at the ceiling, hoping it wouldn't bring the house down on top of him as well, and the ceiling in the kitchen crashed in on top of her. Rubble and debris flew everywhere, and there was a sudden haze of dust in the air. The house groaned and creaked, but it didn't completely collapse... and then it was almost silent. He didn't hear her voice. He didn't see her form in what he could see of the debris, though everything had gone a little greyer, more washed out.
He waited for a moment, wand raised, eying the new mass of shapes for movement, and when he didn't see any for a long while, he slowly backed towards where Remus had fallen until his heel hit something soft.
He spun and dropped to his knees. Forgetting Remus' wand, he felt for Remus' shoulders and turned him, trying not to let fear seize his chest. His fingers slid across Remus' chest to his neck and he pressed two fingers into skin that was a little too cool. There was a pulse. Barely. He gripped Remus' wrist and Disapparated with a crack.
Suddenly, there was far too much white.
Severus had Apparated directly into St. Mungo's and was immediately at a loss for where he was. It didn't help that Remus' dead weight had pulled him to the ground as soon as they cracked into existence, but the white walls and white uniforms all blended together and there was very little Severus could make out, save some movement.
In his haste to get Remus to help, he'd forgotten to pick up Remus' wand again. He couldn't levitate Remus, and he wasn't sure he could carry him either. Even if he could he might wind up doing more damage if he didn't know where he was going. He reached up and snatched at something, someone, moving, and they struggled a bit, likely startled, but Severus held tight.
"He needs help. Bellatrix Lestrange." He might not have time to fully explain, so he hoped just the mention of her would get them moving.
"Al-- all right," the person he grabbed answered. A female. Probably young.
He let her go and in a matter of moments, someone, many someones, were pulling Remus away from him. Severus found himself not wanting to let go, not because he wanted to keep Remus from help, but because he wanted to follow. They pried his fingers open and off of Remus and helped Severus to his feet. He barely noticed he was being touched far too much by far too many strangers as he strained to follow the huddle of shapes moving away from him with Remus in tow.
He brushed them off with and almost unconscious gesture as soon as he was stable on his feet. They were saying something about taking him in to be looked at, but he wasn't paying attention. He was trying to follow the last bits of movement he could still assume Remus was part of. "Where are they taking him?"
"I'm sorry, sir, only family is allowed back, but you need to have "
"He's-" he started, cutting her off. His voice was tight, but then he swallowed hard. He didn't know why there seemed to be a lump in his throat, but that hardly mattered. When he finished his thought, his voice had dropped back to its normal register. "My husband."