Randy Harrison and Christopher Eccleston
(dated 2002 - after Nicole, during some kind of break in QAF, either the season or a break for Randy)
"I'm exhausted," Chris had murmured the night before and fallen asleep in Randy's arms. It was a long trip to the US and though he was getting used to it, it was still hard on him. He is feeling good now, though, having slept what feels like forever. Katie, he knew, was already off somewhere with a friend, having made plans over the phone, and he was fine with it, she always did have more energy than he did. He curls around Randy and kisses under his ear softly, not sure if he's awake or not.
Randy shifts in his sleep, pressing closer to Chris and snuffling a bit. He ducks his head, burying it under a pillow and muttering before throwing his arms up over the pillow. He keeps his body pressed to Chris' though, making sure he stays close to his lover even in sleep.
"Randy," Chris whispers in his ear, having moved under the pillow too. "It's morning..." he kisses him again, this time swirling his tongue inside his ear. He loves watching Randy sleep but he loves him just woken up even more, possibly. "And I'm awake..."
He shivers, mumbling even more and trying to burrow deeper. He swats at Chris' ass, whimpering. "Fi' more minutes."
"Mmm okay," Chris concedes, wrapping around Randy more, deliberately letting his hard cock brush against Randy's thigh. "I can wait that long..."
He turns slightly, pressing his ass back against Chris' cock with a sigh. "Mmmkay maybe I'm awake now..." He smiles, turning his head to look at Chris. His hair is rumpled from sleep and he still looks sleepy.
"Funny, I thought that might work..." and Chris melts. He loves how Randy looks when he's just woken up. He loves how he looks other times, but this... he could live with this always. He's a little... upset isn't quite the right word, he's happy Randy has good work, and it's not like he and Russell hadn't encouraged Randy, but he misses having him close all the time. He'd been thinking about asking Randy to move in with him when the role had come up, so things had sort of been put on hold for the moment. And right now his cock is telling him that it's time to stop thinking.
He presses back more, not knowing what is going through his lover's head. "Mmm you gonna fuck me?" He smiles, leaning in a bit and kissing him deeply. He reaches back, sliding his hand over Chris' hip and back to his ass. "Really want you to right now..."
"I did have that in mind," Chris nodded. "Lube or rimming to get you ready?" he asks, kissing the back of Randy's neck. "How fast do you want me?"
"You pick...I don't care. I just want you inside me." He kisses him, grinding his ass back against Chris to tease him into action.
"Lube, it's faster," Chris groans and bites down, before reaching for the tube that is on the bedstand, slicking his fingers and pressing them inside Randy. "Mmm, hot..." he whispers.
Randy whimpers softly, thrusting back against the fingers. "Feels good..." He whispers, closing his eyes and shivering.
"Always so good with you," Chris says and stretches him carefully before coating himself with lube. "Ready for me, baby?" he asks.
"Yes...please..." He turns his head again, kissing him and pulling one of Chris' arms over him. "Mmm fuck me hard...please?"
"Love to fuck you hard," Chris answers and pushes in, quickly, hips snapping to pull him out again almost immediately, then back in.
He cries out, rocking back with everything thrust and reaching down, stroking his own cock in time with the thrusts. "Feels...oh fuck baby yes..."
"Good... been too long," Chris whispers in his ear, continuing to fuck him. His hand joins Randy's on his cock and he sets the rhythm again after a falter, going a bit faster.
He thrusts his hips back, moaning louder and laying his head back against Chris' chest. "Oh god yes baby..."
"Feels so, so good," Chris moans, and he wants to make it last, but he knows it won't last as long as he wants, it's just been too long since they were together. They can do leisurely later... and he can feel the tingle in his balls. "Close, baby..."
He nods, squeezing his hand around his cock. "I'm gonna come baby..." He whispers, shaking a bit.
"Come," Chris whispers in his ear. "Want you to come first, baby..."
He nods again, shivering and tensing up before crying out and coming hard.
One more snap of his hips and Chris comes, deep inside Randy, filling him and moaning as he collapses, limp.
He pants softly, turning over and kissing Chris. He shifts, laying his head on his chest and closing his eyes. "Sleep now?"
"Or I could cook breakfast while you rest and we could eat outside as it's a gorgeous day?" Chris suggests to him.
He groans, kissing across Chris' chest before looking up and nodding. "Alright...usual breakfast? I love the way you cook bacon with the little bit of maple syrup..."
"Like I'd make anything else?" Chris says with a kiss and a smile. "You'd never let me back in bed."
"Mmm no never. Bacon...biscuits with lots of butter and that jelly you love so much, eggs, and pancakes. I'm a growing boy." He gives a bright smile before kissing Chris. "Gonna take a shower ok?"
"That you are," Chris laughs. "Okay. I'll take mine after. I'm only going to get all messed up again with the cooking anyway...." Watching Randy walk into the bathroom, his eyes are glued to his ass.
He gets in the shower, leaning into the hot stream and groaning once he has it going. He closes his eyes, sighing softly and washing through his hair.
"I don't know how he actually manages to stay as thin as he does," Chris says to himself, searching through the kitchen. He would make the scones - biscuits indeed! - but as Randy already has some in the fridge, he'll heat them up. He won't even look at the pre-fabricated pancakes though, and finds milk and flour and the other ingredients, starting them off.
He finishes up, heading into the kitchen with just a towel around his waist. He moves up behind Chris, kissing his shoulder and sliding a finger down his spine to his ass. "Mmm hungry." He smirks a bit, licking his lips, but he isn't looking at the food. He's looking at Chris.
"Really now?" Chris grins. "I would never have suspected, not with the breakfast menu you asked for..." and he knows very well that Randy isn't referring - at least entirely - to food.
"Can you...ah...lapse on the food duties for a moment? You can still watch and mess with it...but I have better things on my mind for you." He sucks at his neck softly.
"Hmmm..." Chris pretends to consider. "I suppose, I haven't started the bacon yet... if I had it might have had to be a different story, I know how much you don't like burned bacon..." and of course he moves back, arching his neck a little. "What do you have in mind, Randy?"
He pulls away, dropping to his knees quickly and sliding his hands up Chris' legs and over his thighs. "I was thinking something a little like this..." He mumbles, leaning in and licking up Chris' cock slowly.
"I do think I like your thoughts," Chris says and then he moans, cock twitching along the path Randy's tongue follows. "God. Think like this every day, baby?"
He chuckles, sucking his cock down and moaning.
Chris' hands move to rest in Randy's hair and pull slightly, anchoring himself as well. "Fuck..."
He sucks harder, sliding his hands up and over Chris' ass, squeezing as he bobs his head and closes his eyes.
"Randy... oh god," Chris shudders, just loving how he feels. "I love the way you suck me so much, baby."
He sucks more, slipping a finger between Chris' cheeks to tease his hole. He moans, working harder and wriggling his finger into the hole slowly.
If he didn't have Randy holding him up he'd fall, Chris thinks. But he is and oh... Chris clenches around that finger. Shuddering he thrusts further into Randy's mouth. "More..." softly, not quite a demand. Not quite.
He works more of his finger in, wiggling it to try and open Chris up more.
"Fuck... yes... good," Chris says, stroking Randy's hair. He's sort of working on the food as well but it's a good thing the bacon isn't started because that wouldn't even get touched right now.
He starts working in a second, scissoring them quickly and pressing deeper, brushing a fingertip over his prostate quickly.
"Oh god... Randy... fuck..." Chris is moving towards incoherence fast and he has just enough presence of mind to be sure he can let things go for a few minutes before he starts pushing back on those wonderful fingers inside him.
He pumps his fingers slowly, moaning around Chris' cock loudly and pulling back, scraping his teeth gently.
"Close," Chris warns Randy, not stopping because if Randy wants to he will, and if not he knows he can just keep going....
He doesn't stop, bobbing his head faster and pumping his fingers harder.
Chris can feel his balls draw up, close to his body, and he feels the shuddering rip through him as he comes, bearing down on Randy's fingers, his cock pulsing as he comes in Randy's mouth.
He swallows with a moan, leaning his head back. "Mmm so good." He whispers.
"God you look so gorgeous like that..." and oh... Chris has thoughts about what he could do with Randy like this. But he hasn't ever talked much about kink with him. "Hard, baby?" he asks. Then he turns, quickly, flipping the pancakes.
He stands, wrapping his arms around Chris from behind. "M'okay." He whispers, kissing his shoulder and peeking around to watch Chris cook. "Where's the biscuits?" He mumbles, rubbing his cheek against Chris' skin.
"In the oven, baby," Chris says. "Next time I'll make them from scratch." He settles back against Randy. "Promise they'll be better." He chuckles as the timer goes off. "You have good timing." He turns the oven off and takes them out, then takes the other food out, putting it on a platter. "Okay, breakfast is served, baby."
He kisses Chris deeply before grabbing a plate and piling it with food. He goes to the fridge, grabbing the butter and any jelly he can find before heading to the kitchen table and sitting down. He curls up a bit, pulling his feet beneath him as he eats, smiling at Chris. "Thank you babe."
"You know I love to cook for you," Chris smiles. "Always have..." softly, thinking not only of Randy but casting his mind back a long way, to the first breakfast he'd cooked for David. He piles a plate for himself and starts eating.
He leans over to Chris, kissing his lips quickly and smiling. "Mmm thank you. Best cook I know besides my momma." He giggles, fidgetting. "Are you taking the day off from work?" He looks a bit hopeful, blushing softly and biting his lip.
"Considering the only work I had was a meeting with my agent, and I called yesterday to reschedule, yes," Chris agrees. He thinks, again, how young Randy looks. Younger even than... but he's not going to think about David any more today. "Did you have... something in mind?" He wriggles his eyebrows.
"Oh I have many plans for you, but not all of them include a bed with your cock up my ass." He laughs, taking a sip of juice. "Actually I was thinking that we could get dressed and go out. I could show you around here and everything. Maybe even take you and Katiebug to a play tonight? New York is an awesome place to find plays. Or we could do a Broadway show tonight."
"As long as some of the plans include a bed, I'm happy," Chris says with a smile, sipping his coffee. "Getting dressed is never a bad thing. And I do love Broadway - or off-Broadway for that matter. And I would love to see the city through your eyes baby." He takes Randy's hand and kisses the fingers gently. "Sounds perfect to me. Whatever seems good."
He laughs, blushing at the kisses to his fingers. "How about we go get to bed right now...and then go out in a little bit hmm?" He kisses Chris' shoulder softly.
"I think that would be good," Chris answers, kissing Randy's hair. "Mmm. I'll stack the dishwasher if you want, then we can... relax," he winks.
He nods, grabbing his dishes and heading over to the sink. He rinses them off, pulling open the dishwasher. "I feel so...domestic when you're here. Its a good feeling." He laughs and blushes slightly.
"Domestic is... is good," Chris agrees, stumbling slightly on the words. "When it's us..." He stacks his own dishes and the cooking ones, before moving into the living room, his eyes lighting on... a picture of Randy with his parents. Chris wasn't going to think about these things, but they are hitting him at every turn. His eyes fill with tears and he sits down.
He follows Chris and frowns when he sees the tears. "Chris whats wrong?" He sits next to him, grabbing his arm. "Did I say something baby?" He wraps an arm around him, kissing his shoulder softly and waiting.
"Not... not exactly," Chris says, softly. He's not crying... yet, probably. "Just... thinking. Letting things that maybe shouldn't come up. Domestic... I like the concept but the word... it's got... some bad memories associated with it. My... my father used to treat my mother like a domestic, that's what she said... and then..." He doesn't even know how he gets the words out. Randy doesn't know anything and he knows he's going to have to tell him now. "It was after that that he got... that he... hurt me," Chris whispers. He can't say any more yet. Not how...
Randy's eyes widen quickly and he pulls Chris to him, hugging him tightly. "Shhh baby....I'm so sorry. You know you can tell me, right? I won't...judge you. Couldn't judge you." He kisses Chris' forehead softly, rubbing his back.
"I was seven years old," Chris says, softly. "I didn't even know..." he holds Randy, tightly. "Even then, before... my father used to say that I wouldn't be any good to anyone except to fuck. I didn't know what that meant. And then he got... got really angry one day. I was scared. And he..." Chris trembles. "He fucked me. Said it was all I was good for, I might as well start then. Of course I protested. It hurt." He says the words with short phrases. The words he's only said to one other person outside of his therapist in his life. And again, he's holding tightly. Almost expecting Randy to pull away in shock or horror. "He just wouldn't stop."
By now, Randy's eyes are huge as he stares at Chris, lifting his chin and staring into his eyes. "Oh god....oh my god baby I'm so sorry." He whispers, folding him into a hug and holding tightly to him, letting Chris know that he could anchor to him. "Oh baby..." He whispers again, kissing his temple and rocking with him slightly.
"I know." Chris holds tight to Randy. "The... the next day after he... he did that... after the first time, he hit me. He got a stick of birchwood and he hit me so hard I bled. And then..." Chris shudders, "he licked the blood up. I was a kid, baby. I didn't know how to stop him. It went on for years..." he's crying, but it's not harsh sobbing, tears are falling from his eyes. "Five years..."
He shakes his head, brushing the tears away. "He'll never hurt you again. Not ever. I'm here for you...no child should suffer through that, but you are a good man. You didn't become him like so many others might. You are better off. You are a father, an amazing one at that. You are the best lover and friend I could ever ask for..." He smiles, kissing him softly again.
"He... he's dead, baby. He died... when I was twelve," Chris says, softly, holding tightly to Randy. "I couldn't have... even then I knew it was wrong. I couldn't become like him. He and Mum... I'll never know if she knew and I have to believe that she had no idea," he whispers. "When I was twelve, they were in a car accident. I went into foster care and was... I kept to myself. Do you know how bloody terrifying it was when I figured out I liked men? I wondered... wondered if... it was from that. And then I rebelled by fucking anyone - guy or girl - who'd say yes. And then I got into therapy..." Chris pauses then, memories overwhelming him.
He nods, shifting slightly and sitting back, pulling Chris closer and giving him every chance to pull away if he wants or do whatever. "You wanna lay down and tell me this baby? Might make you....feel better? Or...help?" He looks slightly hopeful, biting his lip.
"Not... not all that much to tell you now," Chris answers, holding even tighter to Randy, needing to feel him close. "Laying down would be good, here or in bed?" He's still trembling, the tears are coming out though he's not sobbing, he's just breathing hard and holding as tight as he can to Randy, knowing if he lets go he'll fall to pieces. "The therapist helped me realise what I was doing, and I realised it wasn't good for me to fuck everyone like that. And then I was a lot more picky about who I had sex with. Met a couple of people who were really good to me, but things never quite... worked. And then, I met... David. After that ended, I shut down again, until you..." he knows he and Randy aren't exclusive, but he also knows they're more than casual and he does love him. "I'm sorry... to put all this... on you."
He shakes his head, kissing his jaw. "Don't you ever hesitate to tell me anything Chris. Come on. We are gonna go lie down in bed and I'm gonna take care of you."
"Okay. This is the... worst," Chris says. He lets Randy help him up, feeling drained and so tired, suddenly. "I want... I want to be held, so badly," and he wouldn't usually say it, but it's how he feels now. He holds onto Randy as they move to the bedroom.
He leads them into the bedroom, letting go long enough to get into bed before lifting the blankets and opening his arms to Chris. "Come here baby." He watches Chris climb in, wrapping his arms around him immediately, kissing his shoulder and holding him tightly.
Chris just sinks into the feeling of being held by Randy. "I love you... for being able to hold me, for not running away... for letting me be able to trust you. You know I've only ever told one other person this?" He sighs, softly. "Not that it's what you tell everyone, but I've only been able get it out to two people not including my therapist and that means something. I never even told Katie's mother." He tries to gather his thoughts, to tell Randy about the rest. "It wasn't only that I liked men, though god knows that was hard enough. I was absolutely terrified when I realised I wanted to explore kink. It scared me to death. I was terrified it was that I was turning into him, wanting to hurt the people I was with. I was lucky my therapist was kink-friendly... she helped me realise that's a part of why I like to be in control - I get to decide how the hurt happens and it's a good, positive pain."
Randy nods, listening and scratching over his back slowly, helping him relax. "I would never run away Chris. Not for...that. Ever. It would be wrong of me." He kisses him softly, brushing their lips together with a soft moan.
"Thank you," Chris whispers. He kisses back, and presses against Randy. "That's all the details, but you know now a part of why I do prefer to Dom and why there are only a few people in my life I could have and could even now trust to Dom me." He moves a hand down to Randy's hip. "Since... I figured it all out there've only been a few people in my life. Yes, I play with a few more than that, but there are only a few people I've really cared for. Wanted as more than play partners."
He stares up at Chris for a moment, looking straight into his eyes before lowering his head and kissing his chest. "I can understand that Chris. Sometimes you just can't be close to someone." He kisses up his neck.
"I find it hard to love," Chris whispers. "Came close with Nicole, and there was David... and there is you." He shivers. "Randy? Would you do something for me? Something I haven't done in a very long time? Would you... make love to me? Would you top?" They haven't done this a lot, but right now he needs this.
"Of course I will Chris..." He whispers back, tilting his lips up and kissing him softly, but deeply. "Will do anything you ask of me...always." He shifts, lifting a bit and slipping between Chris' thighs.
"Thank you," Chris lay back. "I need you so much. I'm yours, Randy." He needs to feel Randy inside him to banish the memories their talk has raised, to reaffirm his emotions and to take all the joy in being with Randy that he always has. "I love you," he whispers.
He grabs some lube, slicking his fingers and slowly pushing one in. He smiles, kissing Chris. "I love you too Chris."
"More..." Chris whispers, spreading his legs, looking up at Randy. "You know you're really good at this..." he smiles. "You make me feel so loved and safe. Always have."
He blushes a bit. "I always feel weird though...still not used to it." He mumbles softly, dragging teeth down his neck and shoulder before biting in softly. He pushes a second finger in, working it around and pumping the two.
"I know, but you know what they say about practice," Chris moans softly at the feel of Randy's teeth and his fingers. "Don't want to push you, but... you'll let me know if that happens. I know you will. I just... I can't let myself go with others as much as I can with you." The only others have been David and Nicole... flits through his mind briefly before he is back here, with Randy, feeling safe.
He adds a third finger finally, scissoring all three fingers and pumping them faster. "God your so hot baby." He kisses Chris' chest before teasing at his nipples, nipping and flicking his tongue over them.
"Mmmm, thank you baby, you feel pretty hot yourself..." Chris moans as he feels Randy's tongue. "That's so good... fuck..." he's suddenly really, really hot for Randy, in a way he hasn't been in a while. "Fuck me hard, baby, please," Chris pleads.
He nods, pulling his fingers out and sliding between Chris' legs. He bends, kissing his lips again as he slowly pushes in.
"Love you..." Chris whimpers softly. "Need you, baby. Always. Want..." he doesn't finish. Not yet. He can't let himself say it yet. Not... and even in the middle of sex with the man he loves, the shadow falls over him. For a moment. But then he comes back to Randy, to the moment. "My Randy," he whispers. "Saved me..." And he had, from the pain of losing Nicole, and even healed him some from David.
He smiles, leaning his forehead against Chris'. "I know baby. Just relax." He whispers, ghosting his lips over his skin slowly as he pulls out, thrusting back in slowly and moaning.
Chris does, moaning and curling his fingers in Randy's hair. "You feel so good, baby," he whispers. He clenches around Randy's cock, then releases. "Mmmm. Love feeling you inside."
He gasps at the clenching, staring into Chris' eyes and cupping his face. "You feel good too...so damn good." He pants out.
"Mmmm, try to, for you... love the way you make me feel," Chris smiles. "The way you react to me, so gorgeous..." he runs his fingers over Randy's lips.
He flicks his tongue out against the fingers before sucking them into his mouth, thrusting his hips faster and moaning.
"Oh yes, like that..." Chris groans, liking the increased pace from Randy. "Harder, baby..." he says. 'Just a little... fuck... so good..."
He thrusts harder, moaning loudly as he bends, kissing Chris hard.
"Going to come soon," Chris murmurs into the kiss, clenching around Randy. "Going to feel so good..."
"Come for me babe...let me feel you." He growls a bit, staring into Chris' eyes.
"Yes..." Chris reaches up to bring Randy's lips down so he can kiss them, and he comes, splashing Randy and himself with his hot come.
He gasps against Chris' lips, thrusting once more before coming as well, filling Chris with his seed. He groans, kissing Chris deeper now before pulling away. "That was amazing."
"You were amazing, baby," Chris answers, holding Randy tightly. "You're here and I love you. " And maybe someday I'll be able to tell you about my other nightmares but right now I just want to hold you. He kisses Randy's neck softly.
He smiles, holding Chris close and listening to him breath. "I'm glad I'm here baby." He leans up, kissing him again softly.
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