My Evil Guide Plan
Congratulations on being the creator of a new Evil Plan (tm)!
Your objective is simple: criminal activities.
Your motive is a little bit more complex: to show them all
To begin your plan, you must first incapacitate a chosen one. This will cause the world to slaughter a sacred calf to appease the gods, bewildered by your arrival. Who is this Threat to our Children? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good in a Supervillain Costume with Gimmicks?
Next, you must desecrate the internet. This will all be done from a obsidian citadel, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will fall into catatonic trances, as countless hordes of animal minions (rats, birds, etc...) hasten to do your every bidding.
Finally, you must tauntingly wave your needlessly big weather machine, bringing about Something That's Really Metal. Your name shall become synonymous with the Spice Girls, and no man will ever again dare refuse to be your prom date. Everyone will bow before your Extraordinary Charisma, and the world will have no choice but to fall madly in love with you.